Chapter 2
Poor, Poor Dolores

Monday, 4th September, about 8 p.m
The Gryffindor common room

Harry's hand was in agony after his detention with the Pink Toad. Even three days ago, Harry would have suffered his injuries in silence. But since Dan Granger's letter, Harry no longer was willing to play the uncomplaining victim.

As soon as Harry entered the Gryffindor common room and he made eye contact with Hermione, she asked, "How was your detention?"

Harry replied, "I'll tell you in a few minutes. But first I need to get something, then take you somewhere. Please stay here."

"Harry, your hand—it's bleeding! Let me go get some essence of murtlap and—"

"Later, Hermione! Right now, I need to talk to people and I'm racing the clock. Stay here!"

Harry hurried up the stairs to his dormitory. One-handed, Harry opened his trunk, removed Dan Granger's letter and closed the trunk. Harry shoved the letter into a pocket, then he hurried down the stairs.

"Hurry, Hermione!" Harry said, as soon as he and Hermione had exited the portrait-hole.

Hermione and Harry hurried.

Minutes later, the two teens were outside the castle. The sun almost had set; only a sliver of the sun still was above the western horizon.

"Greyclay!" Harry called.

Pop. "Scion Potter calls Greyclay?"

Just like the last time that Harry had seen this house-elf, Greyclay was wearing an elf-sized grey tuxedo with black cummerbund, with the Potter crest on his left breast. Greyclay was a bit younger than Kreacher, and much older than Dobby. Greyclay's eyes were grey.

Hermione started to ask questions. Harry jerked his uninjured hand up in a Stop gesture.

Harry explained to Hermione. "The P-thing on Greyclay's tuxedo is the Potter crest, which I'd never seen till two days ago. Greyclay is the head house-elf out of four House Potter house-elves. I didn't know that House Potter had house-elves till two days ago, when Susan told me. Two days ago, all the Potter elves were magically weak, till I recharged them. This made me magically weak, till I ate a Ron-sized dinner. Hogwarts wards won't let me call a family house-elf in the classrooms, in the Great Hall, in the kitchens, in the common rooms or in the dormitories—which leaves only the castle corridors, and outside the castle. This is why you and I are outside now."

Then Harry looked at Greyclay. "Please check Hermione and me for Listening Charms, and remove any you find."

Greyclay did so, and reported no Listening Charms found.

At Hermione's puzzled look, Harry explained, "I don't want Dumbledore hearing what I'm about to say."

Harry turned back to Greyclay. "Please go to Tibia and tell her that I ask her to contact Madam Bones. I just finished serving detention with Dolores Umbridge. She has committed a crime against me with an evil quill, another crime is being committed now, and I ask Madam Bones to bring Aurors and a camera to Hogwarts as quickly as she can get them here."

"Greyclay will do!" Pop—the house-elf was gone.

"Harry, what's going on?" Hermione asked, sounding worried.

He replied, "Even if I knew how to Apparate, and I knew exactly where she was right now, I couldn't Apparate to Madam Bones, who is the Director of the Department of Magical Law Enforcement—nasty wards would stop me. I can't ask Greyclay to take me to Madam Bones—again, wards. But Greyclay can go through anybody's wards to talk with Tibia, who is the House Bones house-elf, and Tibia can elf-pop through wards to wherever Madam Bones is. So I just did a magical workaround to my being stopped by wards. By now, Madam Bones should be—"

P-pop. Greyclay and Tibia appeared in front of Harry and Hermione.

Tibia said to Harry, "Regent Bones asks you to go to the corridor outside Professor McKitty's office and you waits for Regent Bones and her Auries to come out."

Harry said, "Will do." Tibia elf-popped away.

Greyclay said, "Greyclay knows where to go! Greyclay can take Scion Potter and his lady friend there, but only one at a time."

Harry said, "Take Hermione there first. But before you take us, can you conjure a cloth to wrap round my hand? The flowing blood is making a mess."

Harry did not think to mention that his hand ached with nasty pain.

Ten seconds later

When Harry was elf-popped to the corridor outside McGonagall's office, Hermione was there and she looked anxious.

Harry said to Hermione, "I've something to tell you, when the excitement dies down."

Through the closed door, Harry heard McGonagall's voice and another witch's voice—

McGonagall said, "Albus needs to be informed—"

"Afterwards, Minerva, you may inform the old goat afterwards! Right now I need you to open the Floo so we can come through!"

"I'm not sure I'm allowed, when Albus doesn't know—"

"Minerva Kirstie McGonagall, you open this Floo right now, or as soon as I enter Hogwarts the hard way, I'll arrest you for obstruction."

Harry heard many footsteps, then McGonagall's door was yanked open by Madam Bones.

Madam Bones called back, "Potter's waiting for us. Shack, get the camera ready."

McGonagall said, "Why is Mr Potter waiting for you? Did he attack Professor Umbridge?"

By then, the white cloth that Greyclay had conjured, which was wrapped round Harry's hand, was soaked with blood. Madam Bones hissed, then vanished the cloth.

Carved into the back of Harry's right hand were the words "I must not tell lies."

Hermione said sadly, "Oh, Harry." She hugged Harry fiercely.

Madam Bones snarled, "She made you use a goblin Blood Quill in detention? Repeatedly?"

"Merlin," said Kingsley Shacklebolt, as he snapped the first of two photos.

McGonagall asked, "Who did this to you, Mr Potter?"

Harry replied coldly, "A professor. So according to the 'conversation' that you and I had this afternoon, I deserve whatever I get after I 'lose my temper,' and I should 'keep my head down' if I don't want another such punishment to happen again."

"I need a name," McGonagall demanded. "Was it Professor Umbridge?"

Harry snapped, "Would it matter if it was? After all, Snape can do whatever he bloody-hell wants to students, and you never stop him. Don't talk like you would do anything to make my life better."

Dan Granger's letter had made Harry realise: If Harry had not involved Madam Bones and the Aurors, and if he answered McGonagall, Yes, Professor Umbridge just tortured me during my detention, all that would happen afterwards would be that soon he would be summoned to Dumbledore's office and would be lectured about "forgiveness." Would the torture stop, if only Dumbledore and McGonagall knew that Harry had been tortured? No, Umbridge would double it.

Meanwhile, Madam Bones was saying, as she conjured another cloth to wrap round Harry's bleeding hand, "...Stop this, both of you. Mr Potter, lead us to wherever Dolores Umbridge is holding detentions."

Harry, Hermione and Madam Bones in front, then six Aurors, then McGonagall in the rear, hurried through the castle. The classroom that Harry led them to had several drops of Harry's blood spattered on the floor, outside the closed door.

An Auror declared, "I detect two magical signatures inside."

Harry said, "One is the Pink Toad. The other is a first-year Hufflepuff girl. I don't know her name, but she's Muggle-born."

Hermione said, "Her name is Peggy Shaw. This is her fourth day in the magical world."

Madam Bones mouthed Three, two, one, then she yanked the door open and she and the Aurors rushed in.

Madam Bones's voice yelled, "Dolores Umbridge, you are under arrest for assaulting the last scion of an Ancient and Noble House, and for violating the Treaty of 1826! You do not have to say anything. But, it may harm your defence if you do not mention, when questioned, something which you later rely on in court. Anything you do say may be given in evidence. Do you understand what I have just said?"

The Pink Toad screeched, "You can't arrest me! I'll have your jobs for this!"

Madam Bones's voice said, "Whatever, Dolores. Aurors, cuff her, Silence her and check her for Portkeys."

Behind Harry and Hermione, McGonagall murmured, "Albus will not like this."

"How true," Harry said.

"Harry my boy," Harry said whilst doing a passable Dumbledore imitation, "I am keenly disappointed in you for helping to get a cruel criminal arrested; only victims should be punished."

McGonagall glared at Harry; Hermione hugged him.

After Umbridge was portkeyed to a DMLE holding cell, what would come next were two seemingly straightforward procedures: Harry and Miss Shaw would get their injuries documented, then treated; then Harry and Miss Shaw would be questioned by an Auror in the presence of an adult.

McGonagall insisted that all this must take place within Hogwarts Castle.

Harry refused. "The Weasley Twins claim that at Hogwarts, even the lavatories have listening charms. I do not want anyone who takes orders from Dumbledore examining me medically, otherwise the parchmentwork might 'disappear' "—McGonagall huffed—"and I don't want to be questioned in the presence of an adult, because that adult would be either McGonagall or Dumbledore, both of whom I have major problems with, right now."

McGonagall huffed again. "Mr Potter—"

Madam Bones said, "But Mr Potter, you need to have an adult custodian present, so that you needn't worry about an Auror doing improper things to you."

Harry shot her a look. "Madam Bones, with the life I've led since I was fifteen months old, being molested is the least of my worries."

What then happened was that Harry and Miss Shaw were taken to DMLE Headquarters, with Hermione and Professor Sprout acting as custodians. Once everyone was at the DMLE, Healer Malkin, who worked for the DMLE, documented, then treated, both students' Blood Quill injuries.

Whilst the Hufflepuff firstie was being examined and was being treated by the man in healer robes, Professor Sprout was rubbing the girl's back. Meanwhile, Harry and Hermione took Madam Bones aside.

Harry said to Madam Bones, "McGonagall is supposed to be my Head of House, my advocate before the headmaster, but actually? She is Dumbledore's loyal house-elf."

Hermione nodded.

Harry continued, "Dumbledore claims to be my magical guardian; but if this isn't him spouting half-truths like usual, he should be arrested for being the world's shittiest guardian. But if you insist on having an adult here whilst I'm questioned, bring my oath-sworn godfather here—"

Hermione gasped. "Harry?"

"—just make sure Fudge doesn't get him Kissed."

Madam Bones shook her head in confusion. "Who is your oath-sworn godfather, and why would Minister Fudge want him Kissed?"

"My oath-sworn godfather is Sirius Black"—Madam Bones's eyebrows shot up—"and he was sent to Azkaban without a trial."

"Merlin on a mushroom," murmured Madam Bones.

Madam Bones decided not to bring Sirius Black to the DMLE to be Harry's custodian—"No way can that end well, when it's only a matter of time before Cornelius shows up, yelling and demanding Dolores's release."

After Healer Malkin finished documenting and treating the injured hand of Peggy Shaw and of Harry, Miss Shaw and Professor Sprout left to floo back to Hogwarts.

Meanwhile, Healer Malkin walked over to Madam Bones. The healer threw up a Silencing Bubble, then he and Madam Bones carried on a short conversation that Harry could not hear.

But whilst Harry could not hear the two DMLE employees, Harry could see them. Both the healer and Madam Bones often looked at Harry whilst they silently talked.

After Healer Malkin ended the Silencing Bubble and left, Harry, Hermione and a Dicta-Quill went to Director Bones's office. Harry said to Madam Bones, "Ma'am, now that I finally have a chance to talk to you without the bearded meddler interfering, I've a lot to say. The problem is, I don't think Hermione and I can say it before fifth-years' curfew."

The plan that the three magicals came up with was that Hermione would be returned to Hogwarts in time for curfew—but just barely in time, and an Auror would escort her to Gryffindor Tower. As for Harry, Madam Bones Floo-called McGonagall and told her that Harry would be returned to Hogwarts in the morning. Madam Bones ignored McGonagall's question whether Harry had been arrested.

Harry and Hermione just had told Madam Bones about the troll in the lavatory, four years ago—and wasn't it strange how the Hogwarts wards had failed to keep the troll out—when Minister Fudge burst in to the DMLE Director's office.

Fudge glared at Harry and said, "I should've known Potter would be mixed up in this!"

Then Fudge turned to Madam Bones. "Amelia, I see the boy is lying again, and I demand that you release poor Dolores immediately."

But the next words spoken were not by Madam Bones or by Harry, they were spoken by Hermione: "Expecto patronum!"

A glowing silver otter appeared.

Hermione told the otter: "Find Director Ragnok at Gringotts and tell him, 'Dolores Umbridge has broken the Treaty of 1826 with a stolen Blood Quill, and Minister Fudge is trying to cover it up.' "

One second later, the otter-Patronus swam through the wall and disappeared.

Fudge demanded that Hermione be arrested. Madam Bones refused.

As for releasing Dolores Umbridge, Madam Bones told Fudge that such a travesty wasn't going to happen: "I refuse to be the witch who starts another goblin war, Minister."

Later at 9:50 p.m, an Auror took Hermione back to Hogwarts. Harry never did get a chance to discuss Dan Granger's letter with Hermione, or to discuss the conclusions he had drawn from this letter.

Harry and Madam Bones talked for a bit over an hour after Hermione left.

Harry said to Madam Bones, sometime when only the two of them were talking—

"So I asked Susan, 'Why have you never contacted your aunt and said, "Get here now, and bring Aurors with you"? Madam Bones might not listen to Joe Student, but always she'd listen to you. The third-floor corridor on the right-hand side, students getting petrified, Dementors attacking me during a Quidditch game—Madam Bones should have good reason to show up here at least once every year. Why didn't you ever call her?' "

The real Madam Bones said, "That is a good question. How did Susan answer?"

"Well, Susan's eyes got strange then, and her voice got strange, and she answered, 'I did not think these were things that my aunt needed to be bothered with. Besides, I am sure that Headmaster Dumbledore can resolve all problems.' "

Madam Bones mouthed—but did not speak—what Harry was sure was a string of obscenities, even as she looked meaningfully at the Dicta-Quill, to confirm that it had just written down what Harry had said.

Madam Bones and Harry talked till eleven o'clock. Afterwards, she escorted Harry to the Auror bunkroom to sleep. By the time Harry climbed into bed, Madam Bones's Dicta-Quill had written thirteen feet of parchment since Hermione had left.