This Love Doesn't Run Chapter 3: It's Too Late to Apologize, an agents of s.h.i.e.l.d. fanfic

This Love Doesn't Run

Disclaimer:
I own nothing.

Rating:
T

Genre:
Romance/Angst

Pairing:
Mayson

Lyrics Used:
Luke Bryan "Apologize" (Originally done by One Republic – I think – but, I just love Luke Bryan's version better! I've heard 3 different version – counting the original – and Luke Bryan's is my absolute – hands down – favorite!)

It's Too Late To Apologize

That it's too late to apologize | It's too late | I said it's too late to apologize | It's too late

That it's too late to apologize | It's too late | I said it's too late to apologize | It's too late

Holdin' on your rope | Got me ten feet off … the ground

With Garrett in custody, Skye had set to work establishing new identities for him and the rest of the team. Examining the new ID she'd made him – Clark Gregg – I like it … He thought to himself as he waited for his pilot, Melinda May – or Ming-Na Wen as she would henceforth be known – to join him in his office. So much had happened, lately. He could no longer be sure exactly where he stood with the cryptic pilot. Suddenly, he recalled the words Lorelei had once used to describe her.

"The warrior with the heart of ice…"

Deep down, Phil knew that wasn't true. But, he wasn't sure how he would ever learn to trust the woman he loved again. The senior agent was soon pulled from his reverie, however, with a quiet knock on his door. "Enter." He ordered, softly, as he watched the pilot timidly pass through the door – sliding it closed behind her – before she took a seat in the chair before his desk.

After a tense, palpable, silence stretched between them, Melinda spoke, first. "Phil, I just wanna say that I am-" However, her apology was cut short.

"Save it." Phil interjected, curtly. "It's too late for apologies, Melinda." He replied. His tone was cold but hurt, as well. It killed Melinda to hear that voice directed at her, as she hung her head. "All I want to know … is why?" He asked, steadfastly keeping his voice level and calm. "Why couldn't you tell me the truth? From the beginning? Why did you feel it necessary to lie – to my face – for months?!"

The pilot sighed, deeply. She knew she didn't have a good answer for the man that had run away with her heart. "I had orders." She argued, so softly that Phil had to strain to hear it, as she slowly looked up to look him in the eye.

"Bullshit." Phil cursed, quietly. "That's not good enough, May, and you know it!" He argued, vehemently.

"Well, it's all I got okay?!" Melinda fought back, weakly. "I don't have a good answer for you, Phil! I don't have the answer that would somehow … make this all okay for you. This is the truth and the truth sucks!" She snapped.

Finally … Phil thought to himself, relieved to finally see some real emotion coming from the usually stoic pilot. Now, we're getting somewhere.

"I just…" Melinda paused to take a deep breath. "I need you to know that … I never wanted to hurt you. I never wanted to hide anything from you." Another silence stretched over the room as both parties considered their positions on the issue. "If I could take it all back – do it all differently – I'd do it in a heartbeat." The pilot admitted, brokenly. "But, when Fury came to me … I was still so … fucked up from the news of your death … I … I wasn't thinking right." She conceded, quietly, staring at her hands in her lap in her efforts to hide her tears from Phil. "When they told me you'd died … It was like a part of me had died, too."

Phil understood where the pilot was coming from. And, his heart wanted nothing more than to take her in his arms and assure her that it would all be okay. But, how could he? How could he assure her of something that he didn't even know for certain, himself? "I get it." He conceded, softly. "I understand." Noting the immediate relief on the Cavalry's face, he knew he needed to make himself more clear. "That doesn't mean that I condone your actions, May."

Nodding, Melinda understood where he was coming from. None of this was okay. Nothing about their situation was fair. "I know." She whispered, her voice thick and watery. "But, I need you to know that I will never forgive myself for what I've done." She added, still unable to face Phil. "I don't ever expect you to, either." Having said her piece – and, thinking that Phil had done the same – Melinda rose from her seat and turned to leave before a gentle grip of her wrist stopped her dead in her tracks.

"Forgive I can do." Phil replied, gently. "But, forget … Well, that's something else, entirely, and you know it, Melinda." He defended, weakly, releasing his grip on her wrist. For that, Melinda truly had no words. She never even expected Phil to forgive her. She considered saying something, but, it looked as though Phil still had more to say. "But, I want to … And, I'm trying."

If the previous statement hadn't blown her mind, Melinda knew – for certain – that Phil's last statement blew it clear out of the water. Staring into Phil's piercing blue eyes, Melinda knew the road ahead of them would never be easy. But, she was beginning to feel – or was it wish – that there might be the smallest chance of hope for them. Not sure if this was the end or not, the pilot knew there was one last thing she needed to get out of her system. Carefully walking around the back of the desk, she stepped up to Phil, cupping his face in her hands. Staring straight into his eyes, she carefully searched for any signs of rejection but found only … was it hope? She liked to think it was as she closed her eyes and oh-so-slowly leaned in – finally closing the gap – with the softest of kisses. It was careful and chaste. Just testing the waters. Receiving no rejection, she decided it best not to push her luck as she pulled away – the faintest ghost of a smile tugging at her lips.

Phil hadn't known what to think when Melinda had pressed her lips to his. But, at the contact, Phil felt something flicker to life deep within his soul. He didn't know if they would actually make it – or if they would even make it past her recent betrayals. But, one thing was certain. He definitely knew he needed to try.

Author's Note:
Okay, so … Obviously not my best work. But, I hope it was satisfactory. Please, read and review! However, if you are "not trying to be mean" ... Don't leave reviews about tiny little nit-picky things that have nothing to do with the story, itself, and say absolutely nothing about the story. If you're not gonna review the story ... Don't review at all. Especially if you don't have the balls to sign the review.

~Skye Coulson