I shifted my weight backwards, plopping down on the ground as the world around me slowed its spinning. I took a sip of my water, my hands still visibly shaking.
"Hm. Anxiety?" he cocked his head to the side, his green eyes studying me with an amused expression. "That can be easily fixed." I swallowed, raising an eyebrow.
"Excuse me." I blinked at him, my voice devoid of all emotion. I didn't know who this guy was, but I knew he was not a faculty member, and odds are if he was skulking around the halls of a high school before school, he was probably bad news. And I did not need any more bad news in my life.
"Don't they have medicine for that?" he shot me a smile that could charm the pants off of the Queen of England, and I glanced around me, just to be sure he was still talking to me. I had to admit, for someone who had probably recently busted out of the clink, he was attractive. Very attractive. I couldn't help shake the feeling that I knew him somehow though.
"Right." I said slowly, standing up and wiping my now still hands against my jeans. "Who are you?"
"Derek." He smiled at me as if it were the punch line of a joke, and I took a small step back. "You're Ryan? Right?"
"How do you know my name?" I eyed him skeptically, looking him in the eyes and reminding myself to stand tall. I had been through enough to not let myself be scared by some dude in a leather jacket. He leaned a bit closer to me, looking from side to side before meeting my eyes again.
"Call it a hunch." He smiled at me and I swear I saw fangs as my vision blurred. I blinked hard, but it was no use. I wasn't in Beacon Hills High School anymore. I was back in New York, at Casey's house, two years younger.
You better run, run, run, run, run
Cause there's gonna be some hell to pay
You better run, run, run, run, run
And that's the only thing I'm gonna say, hey
I wish I'd known right from the start
that I was dancing with the dark
You better run
Devil, Run, Run, Devil, Run Run
Run Devil Devil Run Run
"Stop, stop, stop." Casey held her hand up as the music played on, the speakers on her boom box visibly thumping to the beat. "Avery, you missed your mark again!" she shot her younger sister an exasperated look, before sighing loudly and looking at me.
"I did not!" Avery defended, crossing her arms.
"Well then make it sharper or something! This routine has to be flawless! We're going to make those cheerleaders regret cutting us from the team."
"Case, calm down. Not making that squad of bimbos is the best that's happened to us yet." I laughed, as her glare softened slightly. I looked at Avery, who was seething frustration, and patted her arm. "Ava, just get into it more. Give it more emotion, or it just looks like a robotic dance." It always made me smile at how similar Casey and Avery were. Not only did Avery look more like Casey's twin than her little sister, she had inherited all of Casey's personality traits and mannerisms.
"Why can't you be nice to me like Ryan, Case?" Ava stuck her tongue out at her sister, who reciprocated the action.
"Because Ryan doesn't have to deal with you waking her up in the morning with your god awful singing in the shower. Now, back to work. From the top." She strode over to the stereo, which balanced delicately on the edge of her end table, pressing the back button. The intro to the song started again as Ava and I got into position. About three seconds later, Casey hit the stop button.
"Did you guys hear that?" She spun towards us, looking panicked. Casey Scott never panicked.
"No…Dude what's with you? You look seriously spooked. Is everything o-" I was cut off by the sound of a muffled scream. It almost sounded like a howl. I looked at Casey, who was watching me with wide eyes, as I walked towards the stairs. I had known the Scotts my whole life, and I couldn't remember a time when they weren't ridiculously wealthy. Their house was proof, consisting of three stories, a basement arcade and a winding driveway about a mile long. It was located on the edge of town, buried in the woods, with three ceiling to floor glass windows adorning the front.
As soon as I approached the bannister overlooking the foyer, I saw it. A man, running through the woods, shirtless nonetheless. "What the…"
"What? What is it?" Ava asked eagerly behind me, Casey on her tail.
"I don't…I don't know…" I began descending the stairs, squinting in an attempt to better make out what exactly was going on. "Is he…growling?" My face contorted into a mask of confusion, as I felt Casey follow down the stairs behind me. Suddenly the man turned toward us, green eyes blazing and…his teeth, pointed and sharp, were barred. My eyes went wide as his gaze met mine and I froze, throwing my arm out to halt Casey's descent, instead shoving her back up the stairs.
"Ryan, what the-"
"Go!" I shouted at her, flying up the stairs myself, pulling Ava's arm with me as I passed her. I dove behind their couch, crouching down as Casey and Avery dove behind me. "Did you see that?" I turned to Casey, who looked slightly less panicked, but still obviously spooked. She gave me a confused look and I threw my hands up to my mouth. "The fangs?!" Her lips pressed together into a thin line, as she swallowed and shook her head 'no' slightly. I stood up, walking cautiously to the bannister again.
"Is he gone?" Ava whispered from beneath the sofa cushion she had grabbed.
"No sight of He-Wolf." I sighed, turning back to them. "Maybe invest in some curtains for these things?" I threw a finger over my shoulder to point at the giant windows that seemed to be scrutinizing us at this very moment. "Did you guys know that guy?" I asked, plopping down on the floor, leaning my head back against the wall.
"No. I think I would have remembered seeing him around." Ava gulped, as Casey smoothed her hair down.
"I think his name's Derek." Casey said nonchalantly, continuing to brush her fingers through Avery's hair.
"You think?"
"Yeah. I think he lives somewhere around here. Just a hunch really." She cleared her throat, dismissing the topic. I narrowed my eyes at her, acknowledging that she was keeping something from me, and doing a very poor job of it. She was probably hooking up with him and didn't want my opinion on the matter.
"Well I'd steer clear of him if I were you."
"Why?"
"Call it a hunch." I shot her a look, crossing my arms over my chest.
Everything came back into focus at once, but it all looked brighter. The blue of the lockers, the green of Derek's eyes, the pounding in my head growing by the second.
"You," I breathed, my voice shaky. "You…"
"How's Casey doing?" He cocked his head to the side, and I broke.
"What did you do to her?!" I screamed, launching myself towards him, grabbing a fistful of his jacket. His eyes went wide as he held his arms out, trying to take a few steps away from me.
"What? Calm down, what are you talking about?"
"What did you do? WHAT DID YOU DO? You killed her, didn't you? Are you the reason she's dead? Are you?!" I pulled him back to me, surprised at my own strength, and from the look on his face, so was Derek.
"Word on the street is you're the reason she's dead." He hissed, grabbing my wrists. "Now let. Go. Of me." He pried my hands off of him, pinning my wrists to the lockers. I was near hysterical and I could feel the tears streaming down my face. "I was going to ask you something, but clearly you need some time to adjust here." He said, glancing down the hallway at the sound of a door closing. "You need to get yourself together, before someone else dies." He added, before the screaming started.
It took me until I sank to the floor, curled up into a ball to realize the screams were coming from me. Derek was long gone by the time my mother and Ms. Morrell found me there like that, I guess after someone had either heard me screaming, or after my mom got tired of waiting for me in the car. I don't know how long it was, or how I got home and into my bed, and I only vaguely remember my father coming in to sit with me, trying to calm me down and failing.
I sat there staring at my wall as the sun retired for the night, and the moon beckoned for the stars to come out and play. I was frozen in time, numb to all feeling. I know I had to have been sitting there for hours, but it felt like mere minutes. All I could see was Casey's face, all of the life drained out of her. And Ava, little Ava, staring at me like I had just ripped the sun from her sky. And I had.
"Ry? Are you hungry?" My dad peeked his head in and I shook my head, not trusting my stomach to keep any food down. "Okay. Excited for school tomorrow?" He asked sitting down on my bed again, and I just stared at him, raising my eyebrows after a while. "Figured I'd ask." He shrugged. "Did you know that Beacon Hills is really into lacrosse? Learned that at work today. They think it's better than football, but I don't know about that. You know how much I loved football when I was in high school. I was the star quarterback. I always got penalties when I played lacrosse. I would tackle players unnecessarily, according to the refs." My dad continued his rant, that familiar reminiscent look in his eyes. "Anyway, I hear there's a game tonight. I wonder if they're any good. Hey, do you wanna go? Maybe you can make some new friends before your first day tomorrow?"
I sighed, thinking it over. I really didn't want to go back to Beacon Hills High School. But I had to go tomorrow anyway. And I'd rather freak out at some high strung lacrosse game with everyone distracted as opposed to in class on my first day at a new school. I knew he was trying to get my mind off of everything, and honestly, at the moment that seemed like a good idea.
"Okay." I nodded, throwing the covers off of myself and reaching for my boots. About 30 minutes later my dad had his arm around me in the stands of the Beacon Hills lacrosse field, cheering and shouting so loud people were staring. Either that, or they knew we were new. Or they heard about the screaming psychopath who would soon be plaguing the halls of the school their children attended. It could have been anything really.
I didn't know much about lacrosse, but I put on a show for my dad, since he was trying so hard. I whooped and cheered when we had the ball, stood up and applauded when we scored, and booed when the other team did well. Unfortunately for us Cyclones, as we were apparently called, that meant I was just mostly booing. The other team was absolutely destroying us, and making good use of one player who seemed to be something of a small frost giant? Perhaps the son of the abominable snowman? Either way, he was wiping the floor with our team.
For a while, the game was really helping. It kept me distracted, and I was learning that that was what I needed. As long as I was distracted, I was okay. But when I saw a figure emerge from the woods to the side of us, who looked strikingly like Derek, I felt myself begin to go into panic mode.
"Hey dad, I'll be right back. I have to go to the bathroom." I leaned over and whispered to my father, who nodded okay at me before returning to his cheering. I made my way towards the darkened school, the only lights seemingly on being those in the lobby, bleeding out through the windows and onto the grass. I passed row after row of cars, before a boy in a red track suit almost trampled me. He clipped my arm, screaming a "Sorry!" over his shoulder as he frantically, and to be honest a bit spastically, ran towards the school. I stopped in my tracks, looking from the boy, to the direction he had come from. I heard strangled, muffled sobs coming from one of the cars. I knew I shouldn't have, that it was probably an invasion of privacy, but the sobs somehow sounded familiar. I silently made my way around the car, trying to get a good look at who was inside. All I saw was a red mane of curls, and I knew.
"Knock knock." I rapped on the window with the back of my hands as Lydia mopped up the last of her tears with her fingers.
"Go away!" she said, turning away from me.
"Actually, I believe the next line is something like, 'who's there?'" I smiled, leaning closer to the window. "What's up? Does badly played lacrosse usually make you this emotional?" I joked, as she fumbled with her tissue. "Hey," I said, more seriously. "I was just joking, I'm sorry. Seriously, what's wrong?"
"I'm fine, okay?" she still refused to look at me, instead looking straight ahead as she made an exasperated gesture with her hands.
"Listen, I know I don't know you, and more importantly you don't know me. But you're sitting out here crying alone in your car and I don't know what self help guide you've been reading, but that doesn't constitute being 'fine'."
"Did you come over here to lecture me, because I so don't need that right now." I sighed, realizing how I sounded.
"No. No, I came over here to see if you needed anything. Being alone sucks, crying sucks, and doing both together doubly sucks." I turned, pressing my back flat against her window. "So if you don't want to talk to me that's okay. I'll just stay here so you're not alone." She was quiet for a few minutes, before I heard the click of the door unlocking, and I turned around to see her opening the passenger side door.
"If you're really that insistent on staying here, you mind as well not get hypothermia from it." She looked at me, and her eyes said everything else she hadn't. The thank you that I hadn't needed, but appreciated anyway. I had the feeling Lydia wasn't the type of person to outright say thank you anyway. I slid into the seat, shutting the door behind me, the silence slowly devouring us.
"Did you want to talk or-?"
"Not really." She sniffed, nearly cutting me off.
"Okay." I nodded, pursing my lips. I had been the one in need of comforting for so long, I had almost forgot how to comfort someone else. I frowned at the thought, displeased with myself. I was going to do things right this time.
"You'd just think I was crazy anyway." She dabbed at her eye once more and I let out a laugh.
"You can't really beat me on the crazy scale, trust me."
"Why were you in guidance this morning?" she asked quietly, sounding a bit more like herself. I closed my eyes, a small smile on my lips. Thinking about it always made it worse, but she needed a distraction. Sacrifices needed to be made. I opened them, smiling a bit wider, turning to look at her.
"Once you find out you're gonna kick me out of the car and never talk to me again. That's how the whole pretty popular girl and weird new kid friendship goes right? The popular girl bonds with the new girl, until she finds out her secret, then she dumps her and spreads her secret around the school?" Lydia laughed and shook her head, putting her tissue down.
"No. I won't. Maybe I would have once. But…well I'm not so sure how popular I am anymore anyway. I won't tell as long as you don't." I nodded, and sighed.
"Okay. Well, sometimes I see my dead best friend, I can't get through a single night without having brutally terrifying nightmares, I hear voices occasionally, along with being overly depressed and having awful anxiety." Lydia's eyes widened slightly as she blinked at me a few times, her mouth open and visibly fighting for words to say. "In other words, I have Post Traumatic Stress Disorder." I clarified, as she nodded slowly.
"Oh." she quipped, her lips pushed together into a thin line. "How did you get it?"
"My best friend died, and I basically killed her." I confessed in one big rush of air, hoping to rip the band aid off both for Lydia and myself. She stared at me again, blinking.
"Okay, currently considering kicking you out of the car…"
"I didn't slit her throat or anything." I said, trying to laugh. It came out as more of a choke though. "I was drowning. She tried to save me. The roles got reversed, and she died instead of me." I gave her the abridged version, knowing I'd probably have to finish telling Ms. Morrell the detailed one tomorrow, especially after my episodes today.
"Oh." Lydia said quietly, nodding again. "I'm sorry."
"Yeah." I nodded. "I like your gloves by the way." I said, pointing at her hands in her lap. Her head shot up, giving me a skeptical look before clearing her throat.
"Thanks. I didn't see you in school today, what's your schedule like?" She asked, skillfully switching topics. I liked her.
"That's because my first day is tomorrow. And honestly, I have no idea." I pulled my crumpled up schedule from my bag, handing it to Lydia.
"Oh we have a bunch of classes together!" She smiled, perking up. "Hey, why don't you sleep over my house tonight. I can prep you for school tomorrow and you can borrow an outfit to wear so you'll look killer." She smiled at me, clapping her hands together and I couldn't help but smile back. Maybe Lydia and I could really be good friends. I'd been lacking in the friend department for a while anyway.
Just try not to murder this one, a voice echoed in the back of my head snapping me back to reality. I bit it back though, nodding at Lydia.
"Yeah, that sounds good. Let me just go tell my dad back on the field." I opened my door, quickly walking towards the lacrosse field. The voice in my head was sometimes Casey, sometimes my own. Occasionally it was her older brother, but that's a different story. This time is was Ava. The only Scott child still breathing, as far as I knew anyway. And somehow that made it worse, made the words seem more bitter and vile.
Death followed me like a plague, how could I try to befriend Lydia when there was a 50% chance that doing so might kill her? I bit my lip and shook my head, ceasing my train of thought. I couldn't think like this anymore. I was going to try and be normal. Beacon Hills meant a fresh start at a normal life, and I was going to make the most of it. I climbed up the bleachers, finding my dad still enthusiastically cheering. Things had apparently turned around in my absence, with the addition of a new player on our team.
"Hey, dad!" I said cheerily. I was going to give him no reason to say no. Then again, he'd probably be delighted that I was actually making friends.
"Hey Ry, what took you so long? Did you get lost?" He chuckled.
"Um actually, I made a new friend. She was wondering if I could sleepover tonight?" Immediately my dad's expression changed to one of a more serious nature, beginning to shake his head.
"Ryan I don't know about that, tomorrow's your first day of school at a new school and-"
"Exactly! Lydia's going to help me get ready for school, and she has a bunch of classes with me. I'll be fine, I promise."
"Does Lydia and her parents know about your uh, condition?" he coughed out, as I rolled my eyes.
"Yes, Lydia knows. I'll be fine. I'll see you tomorrow after school." I said, hugging him goodbye.
"Be careful." He called after me as I made my way back to Lydia's car. I was going to make things better for myself. Starting with this.
A/N: Thank you so so much to everyone who has reviewed and given feedback! I appreciate it all so much, please keep it coming! I hope you like where it's going, next chapter is where things really get fun so stay tuned folks! :]