"WHAT IS THAT!?"

The recently appointed Queen of the Pirates looked at the red head as if he was being incredibly daft, a bit like how she looked at those who complained about a woman being the strongest person in the world.

"This is Monkey D. Anne. Say hi to Grand-uncle Shanks, Anne."

The toddler in her arms gurgled happily at the pirate's impersonation of a fish, her dark brown eyes shining with something that everyone that knew her mother would identify as amusement.

Shanks however was still trying to get past the fact that his adorable Anchor now came with baggage.

"What!? But that is… and those are… that is a baby!"

"For now, yeah."

"Do you even know where babies come from?" Shanks screeched.

Behind him, Benn shook his head in exasperation. It figured that of all things that Shanks could have overreacted for first (like Luffy actually managing to find One Piece, bringing down the nobility system or even breaking the record for most takoyaki eaten under an hour) he would chose the fact that she was a mother.

"Meanie Shanks! Of course I do! And it was a real drag, I had to throw away my shorts after my water bro-" Thankfully both crews were spared the gruesome details by the Straw Hats' navigator, who knocked her captain upside the head.

"They don't need to hear that!"

"But, Nami! He started it!"

Shanks shook his head, not willing to get sidetracked. If that damn Kaidou had left him alone a few years ago, he would have arrived to Marineford sooner, and this, this travesty would never have happened! Oh, if only Luffy had been born a boy!

"No way! I forbid you to.. to… to do kids! No! Just no!" Shanks said in what could only be described as a shriek.

"You know, that is exactly what Ace said." Chopper said quizzically, examining the older pirate with awe.

"But, but… Shaaanks." Luffy scrunched her eyebrows and looked at him with teary eyes in her best impersonation of a puppy. In her arms, Anne followed her cue and did the same, with an amplified effect since a baby's eyes are bigger.

"And that is what our girls did." Franky added, nodding with the wisdom of a sensible uncle (or maybe just a distant cousin… the crew never did finish that argument on what exactly they were to Anne).

At this point the yonkou's eyes became slightly unfocused, and a blush began spreading on his face. The baby chose that moment to giggle and suddenly blood burst from the hardened pirate's nose. He muttered something intelligible before the cuteness became too much for him, and he fainted.

"That is new, though." Robin concluded, hiding a smile behind her palm.

"Shanks? Oi, Shanks? Hey, don't fall asleep on me!" Luffy pushed him with her foot, but the pirate was completely knocked out and ignorant of the snickers the crew was having at his expense.

"Let him be, he'll wake up when we open the booze." Benn finally said, guiding her away from his useless captain. Once the initial surprise was over, his eyes took a dangerous glint and he smirked over his cigarette. "Now, you haven't introduced us to the father? We'd like to have a chat with him."

"Ah, Zoro? Well, after we met Dad, Chopper has forbidden him from having any more chats with overprotective members of my family. Say, what does 'overprotective' mean? Can you eat that?"

"Um, we can try to find out." He muttered darkly, while sending a look over her shoulder to the gleeful grins of the senior Red-Haired pirates.

Uh.

Who knew Lucky Roo could look that threatening without even showing his eyes.

This was going to be fun.