Emily pulled up behind the Bureau vehicles, parked on the side of the road on the edge of the woods behind the home where Robert Foster grew up. She got out of her car and ran to the back of the Suburban, pulling out a vest and putting it on. It felt foreign on her body and that feeling brought her up short. She couldn't participate in the search; to throw herself into things at this point would be a distraction that could jeopardize Derek. She settled herself against the side of car facing the woods, heart racing, swallowing down the huge lump in her throat. She would wait and be right there when the team found him. She trusted them to find him. She took in deep lungfuls of humid air. It was nearing three o'clock. If she calculated the time it would have taken Foster to drive here and then drag Derek uphill ten minutes to a cave, she figured Foster had had him there for about two hours. She knew Derek was out there in those woods somewhere; she could feel it. They're coming. Just keep breathing.

The phone in Emily's hand vibrated. Garcia. Her hands were shaking as she hit the button to answer. "They have him, Em. He's alive. Medics are on the way. Foster's not there. State police are coming to help with the search," Penelope said through her tears. They weren't tears of relief, they were tears of despair and Emily immediately knew - Derek had relived his worst nightmare.

Suddenly Emily saw movement in the woods about a fifty yards away to her right, a shock of auburn hair that glinted in the sun coming through the trees. He was carrying a dead rabbit in one hand and a gun in the other. Emily's heart beat with an all-consuming rage. "Foster's right in front of me," Emily hissed quietly.

"What? Emily! Where are you?"

Robert Foster turned and saw her. He didn't shoot. Out of bullets or in a panic, or quickly assuming that the gunshot would alert others? Emily didn't know. He dropped the rabbit and took off at a full run back into the woods. Emily shouted, "I'm in pursuit. I'll drive him back towards the team!" She dropped her phone and took off after him.

Foster was huge and fast, but Emily was faster and was gaining on him. He was downhill a bit from her on her right, and that was what she wanted. She ran perpendicular to him, sometimes losing ground when she had to avoid a tree, but catching up quickly. Just a few more paces to gain and a clear path and she'd have him. She saw a flash of JJ's hair up the hill and to her left, and though she knew they would be on Foster in seconds without her, she couldn't stop herself. With every stride, her anger had built and she was ready to explode. She was almost shoulder to shoulder with Foster at this point and she saw him bring his right hand up across his body to shoot at her right when she saw the clearing she needed.

Emily jumped before he got a shot off, using the fact that she was coming at him from uphill to knock his body, that was easily more than twice her weight, to the ground. She knocked the wind out of him and she took the seconds she had to straddle herself across his stomach and grab his gun. She had the muzzle pointed under his chin before he could take in a full breath.

"Emily," JJ gasped from behind her. "We've got him. Get up. We've got him!"

But Emily didn't move. Robert Foster was looking her in the eye and he smiled at her. "Emily? He cried for you at first."

Emily shoved the gun harder under Foster's neck and Hotch was yelling at her not to do it and to get up, and Rossi and JJ were there shouting the same thing, and she heard sirens in the distance. But all she felt was rage.

"Go ahead and do it," Robert said with that same smile. "I was just heading back so I could cook me and Derek a nice dinner before round two, but I think I accomplished what I wanted. He's broken."

She felt a tug on the back of her vest, but before they could pull her off Foster, she fired. She felt the satisfying splatter of small drops of his blood hit her face and the rage melted away from her, leaving fright and devastating sadness in its wake. Hotch pulled her off Foster, and JJ took the gun from her hand while Rossi checked for a pulse that wasn't there. They all stood and stared at her and she whispered, "Where is he?"

They quickly lead Emily up the hill, JJ keeping a hand on her arm. "I don't know if you want to go in there, Em," she said quietly.

Emily gave her an incredulous look. If that's where Derek was, she was going in. But the minute she stepped into that cave, she could see why JJ was concerned. The scene came at her in flashes. She could see vomit, handcuffs lying on the floor near a metal hook that was drilled into the rock, it smelled like urine and she could see a large wet area on the rocky floor. No blood. Thankfully, thankfully, no blood. And Derek, backed against the cave wall. He was cuffed when the team found him, and likely naked, Emily thought, but he was back in his clothes that he left the house in that morning, just that morning. He looked vacant, like he'd transported himself away from this scene in his mind. She could see the bruising around his wrists from the cuffs, some bruising on his face. Reid was sitting next to him, silent and sad.

Emily crouched in front of Derek and slowly reached her hand out to touch his cheek. "I love you. I'm here," she said softly. But when her hand touched his skin, he pulled away from her, closed his eyes, turned his head.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXX

Derek was non-responsive and silent the entire ambulance ride. He wouldn't answer any questions, he kept his head turned away from Emily and the EMT. Emily stomach turned in fear and worry and sadness. Her heart physically hurt. He was still breathing, but he wasn't really there. She stared at the wedding ring on Derek's finger and reminded herself that he would come back to her. With time, with love, he would heal. They would hang on together.

Emily sat curled in a ball, her forehead against her knees in the private emergency room waiting area. JJ had followed right behind the ambulance in Emily's car. When she came in the waiting area, she put Emily's keys and cell phone down and wrapped Emily in a hug, which she didn't return. She didn't move from her position. But she cried and she appreciated the warmth of her friend. Reid, Rossi and Hotch came in shortly after. They all sat silently in shock. They hadn't even taken off their vests.

At one point Hotch said, "The Unit Chief will be here in about ten minutes."

Of course he would be coming; he had two agents from the same unit in the hospital. Goldstone was fine, but he'd still been shot. And Derek. Emily didn't know what Derek was - definitely not fine. She had one brief thought of herself. She wasn't an agent and she'd pulled that trigger, not in self-defense but in blind rage.

Emily was aware when JJ got up from her seat and left the room. She returned a few seconds later with a container of disinfectant wipes and stood in front of Emily. She unclasped Emily's hands that were wrapped around her knees, and then grabbed Emily's ankles and brought her feet to the floor. Emily stared at her. JJ reached forward with a wipe and cleaned the blood splatters off Emily's face and neck. She repeated the process on Emily's arms and hands. It wasn't a lot, but it turned the wipes a light pink.

JJ reached forward and undid the velcro on Emily's vest, removing it. She did the same with her own vest. "You listen to me, Em. We let you come with us to the scene so you could be close when we found Derek. You promised to stay in the car. You knew you could put Derek in danger if you came with us to search. You got out of the vehicle and put on a vest when you heard a gunshot. My gunshot. We saw Foster running and I got to him first. My gun was holstered when I wrestled him to the ground, but I grabbed his when he dropped it. He reached for the gun in my holster and I fired his weapon, killing him."

JJ looked at Hotch, Reid and Rossi. "Understood?" They nodded firmly.

"We need to trade shirts. You have blood on your sleeves." JJ lifted her shirt off, not caring that the others where in the room. They didn't have time. Emily did the same; they traded. JJ made the same trade with the vests, reattaching Emily's for her before putting Emily's vest that was splattered with Foster's blood on her own body. She cupped Emily's cheeks and said with tears in her eyes, "You're both going to get through this, Em."