Since I first wrote Emma, I have grown spiritually: I have received my First Confession, my First Holy Communion, and my Confirmation. Rereading this story, I find that I have also grown in my writing abilities, and I felt it best to rewrite Emma in my new style of writing. It follows the same plot (Mary reminiscing on her life with Jesus on the night of Black Saturday), but written (somewhat) differently.
The title, "emma," is the Aramaic word for "mother," the language Mary (and Jesus) spoke. Constructive criticism is, as always, appreciated.
The scripture verses I will be using come from the Douay-Rheims, which is in the public domain. Therefore, I do not own (nor claim to own) the Bible, nor, of course, express any copyright on our Lord and our Lady.
"Emma."
How often did I hear that word: one simple word, yet it brought me immense joy each time I heard it uttered. I truly loved my Son, and He truly loved me. He brought me, and Joseph, great joy throughout his life—I will always cherish the times we shared. Even before His birth, He brought me great joy. . .
I will always remember that day: the sun shone in the sky as dawn broke. As I did each morning, I went to the well to draw water. . . "Hail, full of grace, the Lord is with thee!" Full of grace?. . . Before I knew how to respond—before I even knew who spoke to me this salutation—I was told further, "Blessed art thou among women." I was handed a lily by this celestial creature, who continued, "Fear not, Mary, for thou hast found grace with God." Why should I—a servant of the Lord—a young peasant girl—be greeted in a manner such as this?—before I was able to ask these questions I pondered, the angel spoke further, "Behold thou shalt conceive in thy womb and shalt bring forth a son: and thou shalt call his name Jesus. He shall be great and shall be called the Son of the Most High. And the Lord God shall give unto him the throne of David his father: and he shall reign in the house of Jacob for ever. And of his kingdom there shall be no end."
I knew not how to speak to the angel. All that came to my lips were, "How shall this be done, because I know not man?" I had taken a vow of virginity in my childhood—I was to remain a virgin perpetually. The angel appeared assured, and answered, "The Holy Ghost shall come upon thee and the power of the Most High shall overshadow thee. And therefore also the Holy which shall be born of thee shall be called the Son of God." I pondered these words for a few moments—I then bowed, and answered, "Behold the handmaid of the Lord: be it done to me according to thy word." With this, the angel smiled—and from me he did depart.
I struggled with how I was to tell Joseph, my betrothed. He was a just man, but I was unsure how to tell him that I was to carry within my womb the Son of God—however, as the angel announced to me that I was to be the mother of the Son of the Most High, he also announced to me that my kinswoman, Elizabeth, conceived in her old age. I paid not attention to my obligations—as Elizabeth needed my help. As I entered her home, Elizabeth cried out in a loud voice, saying, "Blessed art thou among women and blessed is the fruit of thy womb. And whence is this to me that the mother of my Lord should come to me? For behold as soon as the voice of thy salutation sounded in my ears, the infant in my womb leaped for joy. And blessed art thou that hast believed, because those things shall be accomplished that were spoken to thee by the Lord." In response, I prayed—"My soul doth magnify the Lord, and my spirit hath rejoiced in God my Saviour. . ." I stayed with Elizabeth for three months, and after she brought forth her child—a son named John—I returned to Nazareth.
After I returned to Nazareth, I was three months with child—I resolved that it was now time to reveal it to Joseph. I found him working—he was a carpenter, who built furniture for the rich in the south—in his workshop. I told him—calmly, slowly—praying to the Lord that Joseph would understand, as best he could. He said he did understand—but that others would not. As he did not wish me hurt—the punishment for adultery was stoning—he told me that he would "put me away privately." How sorrowful did I feel! I wept myself to sleep—the words "put me away privately" echoing in my mind.
The following day, I awoke, and went to the well—the well in which my life was changed eternally—to draw water. I washed my face, dressed, and did housework. After my work was finished, I took a walk—as I walked, I saw Joseph. He appeared happy: I was confused as he approached me, smiling. He said that—as he slept—he was visited by an angel who told him, "Fear not to take unto thee Mary thy wife, for that which is conceived in her, is of the Holy Ghost. And she shall bring forth a son: and thou shalt call his name Jesus. For he shall save his people from their sins." O great joy! I smiled, and embraced Joseph in my arms.
Joseph and I lived in normality, and home life was peaceful. I recall one particular moment from those days long ago—I sat upon a chair—one which Joseph had built—and, caressing my abdomen, heavy with child, I silently sang, "my Babe that I carry carries I." I felt great peace as I sang this to my Child—who I loved with all my heart, all my soul, and all my being—who was to be our Saviour.
As months passed, I grew heavier with child, and, eventually, the Child was soon to be born. Shortly before the Child was born, Joseph announced he had news: it was declared that a census of the people would be taken, and all men should return to the town of their birth. Joseph was born in Bethlehem—the city of David—which was many miles away, to the south of Nazareth. I felt no anxiety at the thought of journeying a long way—unlike Joseph, who told me that, if I so wished, I could stay at home in Nazareth. However, I did not desire for Joseph to travel alone—and I resolved that I would be journeying with him to take the census.
We left for Bethlehem soon thereafter—I rode upon a donkey while Joseph walked. After a week's journey, we arrived in Bethlehem: it was cold and dark. Due to the tiring journey, Joseph and I searched for a place of rest. He spotted an inn: however, when he asked if there was any room, the innkeeper simply said, "No—there is no room. I apologize." With a forlorn expression, Joseph began to walk back towards me—to search for another inn—but the innkeeper called out to him. Joseph returned, and, after they talked briefly, Joseph began following the innkeeper, leading me upon the donkey. He told me that the innkeeper noticed I was heavy with child, and gave us his stable in the stead of a room. I thanked him, gratefully, as well as God for giving us this place of rest through the innkeeper.
Joseph and I entered the stable. . . there were not many animals: save for our donkey, four hens, and a sheep. Joseph arranged the hay in the stable so that I may sit down. After I sat down, I felt "something". . . I did not know what it was: it was not painful. It felt peaceful, somewhat relieving. I soon realized that the time for the Child to be delivered had come, and I announced it to Joseph. I could notice he was anxious, but he helped me recline on a stack of hay in preparation for the delivery. As I lie on the soft hay, I looked up at the dark, star-filled sky: in the millions of beautiful stars in the sky, I noticed one star that sparkled brighter than all the rest. I saw it sparkle, and thereafter brought forth the Child. Joseph, in his joy, exclaimed, "yeled"—"child" in Hebrew. I felt great relief after the birth of the Child. Joseph handed me the Child, and I wrapped Him in swaddling clothes. As I held Him in my arms—fed Him—I saw that His eyes were of a dark brown colour—like mine. I wept in my joy—in my immense love for this Babe, who was both my Son and my God. After I finished feeding Him, I lay the Child in a manger—which, given our location, was the most comfortable resting place. He drifted off to sleep, but Joseph and I stay awake in adoration.
Soon thereafter, shepherds came to the stable—genuflecting in front of the child. They told us that an angel of the Lord appeared to them—telling them, "I bring you good tidings of great joy that shall be to all the people: for this day is born to you a Saviour, who is Christ the Lord, in the city of David. And this shall be a sign unto you. You shall find this infant wrapped in swaddling clothes and laid in a manger." The shepherds left soon thereafter.
After the census was taken, we returned to Nazareth—soon thereafter, the covenant of circumcision took place. I felt great sorrow hearing the wail of my Son as He was circumcised, but, as the Lord has given us this covenant, I will fulfill it. During His circumcision, He was named Jesus—the name which He ". . .was called by the angel before he was conceived in the womb." After forty days were completed for my purification—according to the law of Moses—Joseph and I took Jesus to be presented to the Lord in the Temple in Jerusalem—as it is written, "Every male opening the womb shall be called holy to the Lord." It is also written in the law of the Lord that we are to offer a sacrifice: a pair of two turtledoves, or, two young pigeons. In the Temple, Joseph and I were greeted by an elderly man—named Simeon—who took the Child into his arms, and told us that he ". . .had received an answer from the Holy Ghost, that he should not see death before he had seen the Christ of the Lord." Simeon blessed God and prayed as he held the Child—he blessed us, and thereafter took me aside to say, "Behold this child is set for the fall and for the resurrection of many in Israel and for a sign which shall be contradicted. And thy own soul a sword shall pierce, that, out of many hearts thoughts may be revealed." I pondered his words for a moment before a woman—an elderly widow named Anna—came to us, and spoke of the Lord to all that looked for the redemption of Israel. After we had fulfilled the law of the Lord, we returned to Nazareth.
After we returned to Nazareth, we were greeted by three wise men from the east—who had seen a star in the east and came to adore Him, the newborn ". . .king of the Jews." They offered to us three gifts: gold, frankincense, and myrrh, and soon thereafter they departed. That night, Joseph woke me with a start: an angel of the Lord appeared to him in his sleep, saying, "Arise, and take the child and his mother, and fly into Egypt: and be there until I shall tell thee. For it will come to pass that Herod will seek the child to destroy him." We fled into Egypt—there we remained until the death of Herod. Following the death of Herod, an angel appeared to Joseph in his sleep, and spoke to him, "Arise, and take the child and his mother, and go into the land of Israel. For they are dead that sought the life of the child." With this, what was spoken through the prophet Hosea was fulfilled: "I called my son out of Egypt."
After we returned to Nazareth, life returned to normality. Years past—Joseph and I looked upon Jesus as He grew with awe. I recall one particular moment of His childhood—Jesus and I were walking, and we took a rest on a hill above the town of Nazareth. As we gazed upon the town from high above, Jesus looked upon me, and said, tenderly, "I love you emma." I looked at Him, and smiled: I kissed Him on His forehead, and said to Him, "I love You with all my heart, all my soul, and all my being, my Son." We both smiled—thereafter we returned home.
After Jesus completed His eleventh year of age, Joseph and I traveled with Him to Jerusalem—to the Temple—for the commemoration of the Feast of the Unleavened Bread—the solemn day of the Pasch—which commemorates the angel of death passing over the houses of the Israelites during the bondage of our people in Egypt. After the commemoration ended, we began to return home—unknown to both Joseph and I, Jesus had not returned with us. Upon discovering this, I felt great sorrow—Joseph and I returned to the Temple to find Him. After three days, we found Him among teachers—who were listening and talking to Him. As I approached Him, I said to Him, with great relief, "Son, why hast thou done so to us? Behold thy father and I have sought thee sorrowing." As He looked upon us, He said, "How is it that you sought me? Did you not know that I must be about my father's business?"—I have kept those words in my heart since that day long ago. He returned with us to Nazareth, and advanced in wisdom and age, and grace with God and man.
As Jesus grew, so did we: at our marriage, Joseph was several years older than I was, and, after he had completed his fifty-seventh year, he could work no longer. Therefore, he passed his carpentry work onto Jesus, who had helped him in the last years of his life. Soon after Joseph had entered his sixtieth year, he—as well as Jesus and I—knew the time of his passing would be soon: as we held his hands as he lie in bed, Joseph passed his spirit onto the Lord. I kissed him a final time, as did Jesus—we prayed to the Lord, giving thanks to Him for giving us Joseph and asking that He may receive his soul.
A year following the death of Joseph, Jesus came to me—He told me that He had been baptised by John—the child of my kinswoman Elizabeth—in the river Jordan. After He had been baptised, a dove came from the skies and sat upon His head. . . a voice from the Heavens spoke, "This is my beloved Son, in whom I am well pleased." Following a forty day fast, He began to preach, called disciples, and performed miracles.
The first of these miracles occurred at a wedding feast in Cana: I, along with Jesus and His disciples, attended a wedding fest in Cana—on the third day of the festivities, the wine ran short. I knew that if I interceded to Jesus on behalf of the wedding party, He would fulfill the task at hand. I approached Him, and told Him, "They have no wine." Jesus replied, "Woman, what is that to me and to thee? My hour is not yet come." I said to the waiters, "Whatsoever he shall say to you, do ye." Jesus transformed water into wine—the best wine—for the festivities. Following this miracle at Cana, Jesus began to teach in the synagogues, preach the gospel of the kingdom, and healing infirmities. He reproved the scribes and Pharisees, declaring them hypocrites—"Hypocrites, well hath Isaiah prophesied of you, saying: This people honoureth me with their lips: but their heart is far from me."
The Feast of the Unleavened Bread—the solemn day of the Pasch—was approaching, and my Son commemorated the feast with His apostles. Following the supper, the apostle John came to me—he announced to me—and Mary of Magdala—that my Son had been arrested: He was betrayed by the apostle known as Judas, called Iscariot. His Passion—which He had foretold thrice—had now begun. Following His arrest, Jesus was led to Caiphas the high priest—where the scribes and the ancients were assembled—to be questioned. The council brought in false witnesses against my Son—one of which said, "This man said, I am able to destroy the temple of God and after three days rebuild it." The high priest said to Him, "Answerest thou nothing to the things which these witnesses against thee?" Jesus, however, held His peace. The high priest, therefore, continued, "I adjure thee by the living God, that thou tell us if thou be the Christ the Son of God." Jesus said to him, "Thou hast said it. Nevertheless I say to you, hereafter you shall see the Son of man sitting on the right hand of the power of God and coming in the clouds of heaven." The high priest rent his garments, saying, "He hath blasphemed. What further need have we of witnesses? Behold, now you have heard the blasphemy. What think you?" The council answered, "He is guilty of death." They blasphemed Him: spitting upon Him—buffeting Him—mocking Him. The following day, the council led Jesus to Pontius Pilate—the governor—that He might be put to death.
Jesus stood before Pontius Pilate, who asked Him, "Art thou the king of the Jews?" Jesus responded, "Thou sayest it." Pilate found no cause in Him that He should be put to death, but the crowd declared—upon the encouragement of the chief priests—that they desired for Him to be crucified. On the feast day, Pilate was accustomed to release to the people one prisoner: he offered to them the release of my Son, or Barabbas—a notorious prisoner. Pilate said to the crowd, "Whether will you of the two to be released unto you?" I—along with Mary of Magdala and John the apostle—began to weep as the crowd shouted, "Barabbas." Pilate said to them, "What shall I do then with Jesus that is called Christ?" The crowd continued to cry, "Let him be crucified." Pilate responded, "Why, what evil hath he done?" The crowd cried louder, "Let him be crucified." Pilate thereafter washed his hands of the blood of my Son—he had Him scourged, and then delivered Him to be crucified.
Jesus—bloodied, beaten—was mocked by the soldiers of the governor—they stripped Him, dressed Him in a scarlet cloak, placed a crown of thorns upon His head, and a reed in His right hand. Bowing before Him, they said, mockingly, "Hail, King of the Jews." They spat at Him, and hit Him with the reed. After they mocked Him, they tore off His cloak, dressed Him in His own garments, and led Him to be crucified.
As He walked toward Calvary—that way of sorrows—Jesus fell upon the ground. As I saw Him fall—I recalled a memory from days long ago—seeing Him fall as he played as a child in Nazareth. . . I ran to Him then—and I ran to Him again. I picked Him up, and when He recognized who I was, He said, simply, "Emma." I held Him close—kissing Him—but He was soon forcibly taken from my arms, and led back onto the path that led to His death.
Upon reaching Calvary—Golgotha—Jesus was stripped of His garments, and nailed to His cross. I stood underneath Him—with the apostle John on my side, and Mary of Magdala at the feet of my Son—looking up at Him. . . His blood redeeming the world of its sins as passersby blasphemed Him. Just prior to the ninth hour, I walked closer to His cross—directly underneath my Son—looking up into His eyes: I looked into them, and I recalled when I first looked into His eyes following His birth. I said to Him, weeping, "My Son, I love you with all my heart, all my soul, all my being—my Son—my Saviour." He looked down upon me, and with compassion in His hoarse voice, said, "Woman, behold thy son," referring to apostle John—looking upon the apostle John, He said, "Behold thy emma." Afterward, Jesus said, "I thirst"—they put a sponge soaked in vinegar to His mouth, which He drank. Thereafter, He said, "It is finished". . . looking up into the sky, He continued, "Father, into thy hands I commend my spirit." With this, His spirit went from His body.
The earth began to quake, rocks were rent, and the veil in the temple was ripped—in terror, the soldiers came to the crucified to break their legs that they may not remain on the cross on the sabbath. However, seeing that He had died, they did not break His legs—to see that if He was dead, they thrust a spear into His side, and immediately there came out blood and water. A disciple of Jesus', a man of Arimathea named Joseph, was granted by Pilate to take the body of Jesus—he and Nicodemus lowered the body of Jesus into my arms. I cradled Him—as I did after His birth, now I do so after His death. I kiss Him—on the forehead—and whisper, "Emma loves you."
That was the day before last: before the sun set, and the sabbath began, my Son was laid in His tomb, offered by Joseph of Arimathea. It is now in the early hours of the day following the Sabbath—the sun has not yet begun to rise above the horizon. However, I hear noise—strange, considering the hour—it seems to be footsteps. I—I hear a voice.
"Emma."