[KnM][RGU][MH] Revolutions
Revolutions – Chapter 13 (Phone calls to the Edge)
A Kannazuki no Miko, Revolutionary Girl Utena and Mai Hime X-Over Fanfic
February 23, 2013 – March 6, 2013
Word Count: 9,700
More Author's notes follow at the end. Comments and Criticisms are greatly appreciated!
On the other side of Japan, in the middle of a lesson plan, standing at the front of her classroom, Utena suddenly got very, very dizzy and collapsed to the floor. Her students rushed to her aid, the class rep telling one of her peers to quickly go get the school nurse. The nurse checked all her vitals, but couldn't find anything wrong with her. Still, to be safe, they escorted her to the nurse's room and asked her to rest there for a little bit.
Despite this, Utena couldn't help but know, deep down, in the very core of her being, that something fundamental was changing – had changed – in the universe, and whatever that something was, it was terrible, and heartbreaking. She felt as though someone was screaming for help, that a great injustice was being committed right now, that something beautiful and meant-to-be was being ripped apart and perverted.
... no, not ripped apart, something deep inside Utena's soul corrected, but rather, unwound, unwritten, and rewritten, into something... something soulless. Something without love.
The nausea hit her again, and Utena's vision swam. Vertigo assaulted her, and for a moment, she felt as though she were zooming out of her own skull, up and up, the world shrinking smaller and smaller in front of her, until she could see the whole of it in front of her, and the people, so many people, so many unhappy, distraught, crying people, howling for help.
Howling for her help.
WHY AREN'T YOU HELPING THEM? Something deep inside her demanded. YOU ARE THE PRINCE, ARE YOU NOT? WHY HAVE YOU FORSAKEN YOU DUT-
She managed to grab the garbage can beside the bed just in time.
When she was done retching, she put the can down and weakly wiped the spittle from her mouth. Sliding feebly backwards, she threw an arm over her eyes and trembled on top of the mattress for a few minutes, having broken out in cold sweat.
What... what the hell was that?!
Swallowing, the bitter taste of the bile in her mouth managed to ground her firmly back into her own body, on the nurse's bed, and Utena took a shuddering breath.
That was when the anxiety and baseless (but was it really baseless?) paranoia hit, and Utena suddenly scrambled up and fumbled for her phone from her jacket pocket. Punching in her daughter's number with quivering hands, she thought she would go nuts from anticipation as the phone rang, and rang and rang.
Pick up the phone, baby girl! Please! Pick up the phone!
Chikane finally answered after far too many rings. Her voice was completely normal and neutral, toneless, even. "Hello?"
Utena's heart did a strange flip in her chest. On the one hand, the calm, collected voice of her daughter brought instant relief to her mind – oh, thank god, she's alright – and yet, an instinct inside her heart kept insisting that not all was as it appeared. "Baby girl? Are you okay? Did something happen?"
Surprise entered her daughter's voice. "I'm fine, Okaa-sama. Nothing's happened to me. Did something happen to you? You don't sound well."
Utena was silent as she evaluated her daughter's words. There was obvious concern in her daughter's voice, and she wanted desperately to believe in her daughter's words, desperately, and yet, she could tell that Chikane was hiding something from her.
Memories of those alien yellow eyes on her daughter's face flashed through Utena's mind, and she grit her teeth.
Stop this, she scolded herself. Stop this now.
"I guess I just had a weird panic attack." Utena finally admitted, laughing weakly, fooling no one. "Wow. Your old woman really is getting old."
"I see." Chikane replied, faint amusement in her voice.
Though the conversation should have ended there, Utena was not ready to let her daughter go yet. Hastily, she wracked her brains for something, anything, to keep her on the line. "Um... so... so how is everything? How's school?" And then, an old memory clicked in her mind, and Utena blurted, "oh! My surprise! Has she shown up yet?"
Chikane was silent on the other side of the line for a very long time.
Utena frowned, feeling that anxiety in her heart rise again. "Hello? Chikane? Are you still there?"
"Yes, I am, Okaa-sama," Chikane replied quickly, a little too quickly. "Sorry. Yes, I met H..." her voice skipped, "...I met Kurusugawa-san. Yes. It was everything I had hoped for. I wish you could have been here to see it."
And now Utena could tell her daughter really was lying. The heartbreak in her voice was unmistakable.
"Chikane-" Utena tried to say, but her daughter cut her off.
"I'm sorry, Okaa-sama, but I have to go. I'm actually in the middle of something somewhat pressing right now."
Utena's brow creased with worry. Desperately, she tried to think of another topic to ask her daughter about. Anything. She just didn't want her daughter to go. Her instincts told her that if she let her go, then it would be a very long time before she'd be able to talk to her again.
"Chikane-"
"Please, Okaa-sama, I-"
"I love you." Utena said, because she suddenly felt that it was absolutely imperative that she remind her daughter of that. "I love you. I'll always be here for you. Always."
Her daughter was silent on the line. Finally, after an eternity of a moment, she replied, "I love you too, Okaa-sama."
And then Chikane hung up.
Utena felt her phone slip out from her fingers.
She clenched her hands into fists.
Something inside of her threatened to break.
Something important, something that supported the basis upon which the core of strength within her had been built and sprung from, for so many years now, that which had enabled a scare, stupid, kid to struggle on against the misery of the world and carve out a life, a relatively happy life, for herself and her baby.
Faith.
Faith that someone she loved was looking out for her and hers.
Faith that Himemiya Anthy had been moved, that someone as far gone over the edge of despair as even the Rose Bride had been, was able to once more open her eyes after eons of misery and torture, and have the courage and hope to step out into the world again.
To look for her. To look out for her. To shine together.
Even if Himemiya Anthy couldn't be seen. Even if Himemiya Anthy couldn't be touched.
Somewhere, somehow, deep down, Utena had always known that Anthy was with her, every day, looking out for her, for her child, whom she had named after her, to never forget her, to have some semblance of her in her life always (even if that child went by another name on a daily basis, she was always 'Anthy' on some level to her mother). To make sure that they were okay. To make sure nothing horrifying they couldn't eventually spring back from would ever befall them.
Himemiya.
Angry, inhuman, monstrous yellow eyes flashed through Utena's mind, followed by an image of her daughter, splattered with blood, holding a very long sword, swinging madly away at an ancient, bound foe, severing heads with wild desperation in her eyes.
Akio stood beside her. Anthy stood behind him.
Utena clenched her fists, and squeezed her eyes shut.
Her faith broke.
Himemiya Anthy, Utena thought, was gone. She hadn't been looking out for her all these years, after all.
It was then that she felt the wind play with strands of her hair.
Turning her head towards the window, she spied... absolutely no one there.
Utena closed her eyes again, and laid down on the bed once more, feeling suddenly, very, very tired and wary.
"Himemiya," she whispered softly, finally able to utter that name out loud. "Please, if you're out there somewhere, please, answer me. What happened? What happened to my baby?"
She waited a long time for an answer – any sign of an answer – but the room remained silent. No one answered her questions. Utena looked over at the window again, but there was no one there.
It wasn't until a little while later, did she wonder, absently to herself, 'why did I feel the wind blow if the window is shut?'
In a desolate landscape, Himeno Fumi sat in the dirt and stared straight ahead, unseeing, unhearing.
She didn't notice when her blue-black haired attacker lowered her arm, the bow she held in it flickering, and then disappearing entirely.
All she knew was that Suishouhime was gone, disintegrated into a cloud of purple black speckles before her very eyes, and then time had slowed to a crawl.
Even when there came a sudden and shrill ringing sound that vibrated all around, all that prompted Fumi to do was to blink slowly.
Her world had ended. How could time still exist after that?
Chikane frowned. "Excuse me," she said, before turning away from Fumi and pulling a cellphone out of her pocket to put to her ear. "Hello?"
Fumi woodenly turned to look at the girl. She could see her. She could hear her conversation. But none of it seemed to be making much sense in her mind.
"I'm fine, Okaa-sama. Nothing's happened to me. Did something happen to you? You don't sound well."
A phone call? Fumi wondered.
"I see."
The director frowned. But... how is there reception here?
At this point, there was a second pause, much longer than the first, and in its duration, Fumi blinked slowly once more. Time still seemed to be moving strangely.
When Chikane spoke again, her voice was noticeably more strained than before. "... Yes, I am, Okaa-sama. Sorry. Yes, I met H... I met Kurusugawa-san. Yes. It was everything I had hoped for. I wish you could have been here to see it. I'm sorry, Okaa-sama, but I have to go. I'm actually in the middle of something somewhat pressing right now. Please, Okaa-sama. I..."
There was another long pause.
"... I love you too, Okaa-sama."
Curious... Fumi thought, as she listened to Chikane's voice, softer than she'd ever heard it.
How can one capable of such cruelty also be capable of such tenderness...?
Chikane pulled the cell phone from her ear, blood from the gash on her cheek smeared all over it. She ended the call and put the phone back in her pocket. She was silent for a while after that, and Fumi thought she could see the girl take a long, deep breath, before turning around to face her again, her mask back on.
"I'm sorry about that," Chikane said, crouching down so that Fumi's could look her in the eyes. Fumi stared at the left eye uncomprehendingly, wondering, with an almost detached sense of morbid curiosity, why the large black vein that ran through it looked so familiar. Even as she looked at the eye, the gash on the cheek directly under it began to heal, leaving only the blood already spilt to dry on the skin.
"Are you hurt, Director Himeno?"
Fumi stared at Chikane.
Hurt?
It wasn't a particularly complicated question, and yet, Fumi found herself having a hard time answering it.
Finally, she blinked again, once, twice, before saying, in a very hoarse voice, "... what did you do? What did you do to Suishouhime? To Mashiro-sama? Why..."
And the enormity of just how hurt she was finally hit Fumi full in the face, in all of her senses, snapping her out of her dazed funk.
Time sped up to regular pace again. and she grit her teeth even as she clawed at her chest, trying to rip out what was trying to pass itself off as her heart.
"Why do I feel so... ! So...!"
"Empty?" Chikane's expression was remorseful.
Fumi cringed, clenching her eyes shut even as tears spilled from the corners of her eyes.
Mashiro-sama. The girl who had taken her in, and given her everything when she had nothing. The girl who provided her twenty years of home, duty and purpose. Her most important person. The girl she loved with every fibre of her being. Just recalling memories with Mashiro-sama used to fill her heart with strength, enough to get through the day, enough to make a difference in many, many young lives.
But right now, thoughts of Mashiro-sama made her feel... nothing.
Like there was a crater in her chest where her heart should have been.
Like Mashiro was no one to her at all.
Like the last twenty years of her life hadn't happened the way she remembered it.
In her mind's eye, it was as though she had two sets of memories – one in which she'd grown up the maid of Kazahana Mashiro, the other in which she'd simply gone back to the foster home.
When Fumi opened her eyes again, they were ablaze and she slapped Chikane in the face as hard as she could. The blue-black haired girl's head was wrenched roughly to the side by the force of the slap, and stayed there for a while. When the girl turned her head back to regard the director, there was a trickle of blood coming out of her mouth.
"A Child is the manifestation of a person's love for their most important person. They are powered by it, and they are personified by it," Chikane said softly, patiently, wiping the blood away from the corner of her lips. "I am sorry, but I have need for that power, for your power. I hope, one day, to be able to return it to you, but that is not something I can promise."
Fumi stared at the girl who said this to her, and she knew hatred, and she knew despair.
It came to her with disturbing ease.
She raised her hand to strike Chikane again.
"Call your servant."
Fumi froze. "What?"
"Suishouhime." The blue-black haired girl repeated, even as she got to her feet, and offered Fumi a hand up. The maid ignored it. Chikane retracted her hand awkwardly. "She may not be your Child anymore, for the Child known as Suishouhime, born of the affection Himeno Fumi held for Kazahana Mashiro, never existed, as the circumstances that brought Kazahana Mashiro into your heart have been overwritten. However, Suishouhime is still connected to you. As your servant. As your other self. Call her."
Fumi stared at Chikane as though she were completely mad. And then, with a tremble in her voice, Fumi whispered the name.
"S-suishou... hime..."
As she said this, there was a dull roar in the distance, and when Fumi turned to face it, she could see a familiar outline appear, lumbering out of the rolling fog.
Fumi covered her mouth with her hands in horror.
Out of the mists, Suishouhime appeared before her. While her outline hadn't changed, everything else had. Her skin, formerly a luminous, pearly white, was now a twisted grey-brown color. Her formerly beautiful, unearthly face was skeletal, with empty, black eye sockets, and a mouth full of twisted, jagged teeth. In the middle of her chest, where Chikane had shot her, was a darkly glowing, complicated symbol of interlocking lines cradled by a crescent moon.
Faintly, in the back of Fumi's head, she could hear it.
Screams of fury. Roars of outrage.
The Obsidian Lord.
What are you doing?! You have Suishouhime and her Hime in your grasp! You should kill them! Tear them apart limb from limb so that their souls will never know peace, in this world, or the one after it! I will have my vengeance!
And she could hear Chikane's voice in her head too. Calm and cold as ice.
Death is not the worst punishment. There are things far worse than death.
In the face of despair, death is a mercy.
And as Fumi stared at what had become of Suishouhime, she wished, very dearly, for mercy.
"Hey, Natsuki? Why does sex have to change everything?"
"I don't know, Mikoto. It just does."
Memories of a conversation from a few months ago drifted unbidden into Natsuki's mind just as she crossed that threshold between dreaming and consciousness. She hadn't been able to answer her younger friend that day, but now, Natsuki thought idly, if Mikoto were to ask her again, she thought she might be able to give her a more satisfactory answer.
She could feel Shizuru's breath tickling the top of her head. She had fallen asleep on top of her, in her bed, their limbs all a tangle, her head resting on Shizuru's chest.
It's because it's an act that strips everything away from you, and leaves you naked, defenseless and vulnerable, and, somehow, you're supposed to share yourself, in that state, with nothing else, just you, with someone else. And you're out there, just, out there, on a limb, unsupported, and they... they could do anything to you. They could take you at your most vulnerable moment, and, they could really mess you up. But, somehow, you trust that they won't, and then, together, you go to this place you've never been before, and you only get to go there for the first time once, and, after you get there with that someone, whom no one else has been to before, and a whole other world you didn't know existed just blossoms out in front of you, like... like eternity, or a miracle, or something shining... how can everything not change?
Even as she thought about this, Natsuki blushed, memories of the previous night's activities coming back to her. She'd now gone to that place with Shizuru several more times since their first trip there a couple weeks ago, and Natsuki realized she was probably being silly for still thinking so reverently about sex but she just couldn't quite help herself.
Maybe, one day, it wouldn't mean so much anymore – certainly, she knew enough about how the world worked to know how easily people could become jaded (take, herself, for instance), that even the most sacred of unions could quickly become just another itch to scratch, but, she hoped that day wouldn't come too soon.
Natsuki took a deep breath, even as she languidly drew circles with her index finger tip on Shizuru's skin. The older girl remained asleep.
Maybe they were overdoing it. Maybe it had been a bad idea to give Chikane their room for space, to have spent the last couple of weeks living with Shizuru instead. Sexual intimacy hadn't been why Natsuki had done it, of course, though she'd had a suspicion that it would result. Just not... so... copiously...
Natsuki took another deep breath.
Her heart was in seriously weird dichotomy.
On the one hand, she could not help feeling dread, and nervousness, clawing at the back of her heart.
On the other hand, the rest of her heart was so full and happy with what she was experiencing with Shizuru, sometimes, she couldn't even tell which way was up, and which way was down anymore.
She couldn't quite tell what was important, and what wasn't.
Something seriously bad was going down with Chikane. Natsuki knew this. Her friend had changed, subtly in the eyes of those who didn't know her very well, but Natsuki did know Chikane well (somehow, against all odds, two closed off and very private individuals had found a way to connect to one another, as though their bonds had been there from a previous life), and she thought the changes to be quite drastic.
When Natsuki had gotten home the night of the gala, she had been surprised to see her roommate not in bed. She had waited up all night for Chikane to return, and it wasn't until the wee hours of the morning did the student morality squad finally escort the student council president home, everyone looking deeply concerned.
Natsuki hadn't even gotten out of her dress yet – Chikane had said she wanted pictures of the gala after all, and Natsuki had figured her friend would have gotten a kick out of seeing her all decked out. So, she had still been dressed in finery, quite out of place, when Chikane was escorted home.
Natsuki had been surprised. "Where were you? What happened?" She had asked.
And Chikane had simply shook her head. "I don't want to talk about it," she said, shutting down that line of conversation immediately, though she did give her roommate an appraising glance to soften her rudeness when Natsuki had frowned. Chikane gave her a smile she might have actually felt. "You look lovely, Natsuki-sempai."
"Oh, um, thank you." Natsuki had said, hesitantly, not quite sure how to broach something her roommate obviously did not want to talk about. "I took some pictures at the gala, like you asked." She had said, trying to break the ice.
Chikane had raised an eyebrow. "Did I ask you for pictures?"
Natsuki had frowned. "Yes, earlier in the evening. You said you were going to sleep your headache off, and asked me to have fun at the gala, and to take pictures." She pulled her phone out to show her roommate the text.
Chikane took the phone and read her message. Then she had simply said, "... I see."
After that, Chikane started to actively avoid Natsuki, going so far as to not return to their room at night to sleep. How she managed to escape curfew detection, and where the girl was actually sleeping, Natsuki didn't know, but she had flipped out after the third night of worrying about her.
Skipping one of her own classes, Natsuki had waited outside Chikane's one day, and grabbed her arm tightly just as classes were let out.
Natsuki couldn't even really remember the words she had exchanged with her roommate, only that they had been harsh, on both sides. All she could really remember with certainty was at one point, throwing her hands up in the air and shouting, "Whatever! Look, if it's ME you can't stand, then I'LL move out. I can just go stay with Shizuru or Mai or something. But you... you shouldn't not come home for days at a time! That's not right! Stop making everyone worry!"
And that's how Natsuki had found herself on Shizuru's doorstep, and the last week had been... eye opening.
Natsuki sighed. She just couldn't help feeling like an epically bad person, the most horrible of bottom feeders.
While one of her closest friends was going through something freakishly sinister which may or may not involve supernatural elements and the end of the world, here she was, having night after night of mind blowing sex with her girlfriend, so grand, they barely made it out of bed the next morning.
Natsuki knew, first hand, that despair and depression could seriously mess you up. Everything could get so overwhelming you couldn't see or think or walk straight anymore. She had no idea that happiness could make her feel the same way.
Seriously. What is wrong with me? Why can't I figure out what's right and what's wrong anymore?
Natsuki knew that she should be expending most of her energy on helping out a friend in need, even if that friend was making helping her impossible.
It was then that Natsuki felt Shizuru stroking her hair, and that sensation flipped her heart on its side again. Shizuru was awake. Natsuki craned her head up to look at ruby eyes regarding her with sleepy fondness.
"Good morning," Shizuru said softly.
"Morning." Natsuki replied.
Shizuru frowned, obviously sensing the change in Natsuki's mood. "What's bothering you?" Shizuru asked.
Natsuki looked away.
Shizuru sighed. "Natsuki, please, talk to me."
Natsuki shook her head. She knew she wasn't being fair or rational, but right now, in that moment, she didn't want to deal with the world just yet. She just wanted to stay here, in the comfort of Shizuru's arms, for a few minutes longer, where everything was right.
Pulling herself upwards a little, Natsuki resettled herself on top of Shizuru's body, and kissed her, deeply.
When she did this, everything else seemed to disappear. There was just her, and Shizuru. Nothing else existed.
Not even their silently buzzing cell phones, which had fallen off the night stand and onto the floor, muffled amongst discarded clothing.
The universe was a strange thing that sometimes resembled a piece of paper, and sometimes a piece of cloth. There's a reason why they called it the 'fabric' of reality. Despite what most people thought, the universe, and time, and reality, was not a set, static thing. It was quite responsive to those that existed within it, and sometimes, under very specific circumstances, it could be twisted and changed and bent to the will of the gods, higher and lessor, those incarnations of the basic, fundamental principles and emotions of the universe that sometimes became so strong they manifested to walk amongst humanity.
This was how the Hime Star could grant the wishes of the victor of the Festival, before the system was hijacked and overtaken by Obsidian, the God of Ambition and Greed. It was how the sacrifice of the Solar and Lunar Priestesses could unwind the destruction of the Eight Headed Demon of Despair. It was how the Witch could cut the Prince off from the source of his power, and why the Witch could not be with the new Prince, even though she knew she was loved by the new Prince, for there were other things lying dormant in the heart of the new Prince that would awaken at her presence. Angry things. Hateful things.
The End of the World smiled, as, despite his powerlessness, he still had the ability to sense it when his brethren tried to twist the universe, change what was or what was meant to be, to suit their own needs.
He stood on the top of the third torii gate, in the place that was not quite here and not quite there, and watched, impassively, as his daughter, the new Orochi, tried to force her will upon the universe, to un-write the personal history of Himeno Fumi, and turn the Hime into one of her followers, one of her disciples, one of her necks.
This wasn't the first time the Lunar Priestess had tried to fight back against the universe.
She hadn't been entire successful (or unsuccessful, depending on one's point of view) the last time, and she wasn't going to be entirely successful this time either, as tampering with the fabric of reality and trying to re-weave what-has-already-happened was not something that any of the incarnations did lightly. And if he had to guess what was going on through her mind, based on her actions so far, he would wager that she would be attempting this at least seven more times to come.
He smiled.
The universe was not going to just sit there and take it. She was twisting it too roughly, too insistently. Inelegant. Barbarian.
Tears were forming – had already formed. And from the tears in reality, those that did not exist within the universe, were already starting to creep and crawl their way into it, eager to taste the intoxicating headiness of existence.
In fact, several large, glowing red eyes were already peering out curiously from one of the cracks, inside the forest that bordered Fuuka Acadamy, and a single, large, clawed hand tentatively pushed its way out of the crack, and into the world.
The End of the World felt his smile broaden.
There was no way that the new Prince could ignore this for much longer.
He brought out a cellphone – not his – and tapped two short messages into it.
The first one he sent to an old acquaintance he'd had off and on contact with for the last 16 years: What you seek can be found under the area that was once a dueling arena.
The second one he sent to one whose acquaintance he had yet to meet:
Do you want to remember?
Miss Mikoto! Cometh quickly, thy presence is needed!
Mikoto looked up from her homework with a piece of toast still sticking out of her mouth at Chu Chu, who had just run up to her and was 'chu!'ing excitedly, waving her arms about.
"Hmm?" Mikoto quickly swallowed her bread. "What is it, Chu-suke?"
I hath detected a treasure trove of undergarments so marvelous the gods themselves would weep to behold the sight! Tis discovery most auspicious, windfall most divine!
"Panties?" Frowning, Mikoto got up from the table she was doing her homework at. She followed Chu Chu to the window and poked her head and the entire upper half of her body out to take a look. Chu Chu leapt onto her head and pointed due east.
'Chu!'
Mikoto cocked her head to the side. Chu Chu was pointing at the teacher's residence building. On the fourth floor, someone had hung out a circular clothes rack to dry. It was currently holding several (mostly dried) bras and panties. Mikoto's brow crinkled. "Mmm... I think those already belong to someone, Chu-suke. I don't know if we should take them."
Oh, Miss Mikoto, please! Thou art breaking mine heart! Please, lend me thine ear and listen closely! Closeth thine eyes!
Mikoto did as she was asked.
Canst thou not hear it? The sad, melancholic wail of a beautifully sew garment, unused? Denied the warm flesh of one twas made to support and hold, in sickness and in health, 'til death do them part? Tis a most sacred union, that be'twix a woman's flesh and the garments that coddle them. To treat one's underthings with such callousness! Such cruelty! Does not thine heart weep for the injustice in this world?
Mikoto scratched her head. "Um... I don't really understand what you're saying, Chu-suke, but, I guess, if you want the underwear so much, we can go get it."
Oh, Miss Mikoto! Thou art a knight! A saint! Thou art a bastion of all that is good in this world! A Prince! A King! All that which- CHUUU!
The monkey mouse was cut off from her soliloquy when Mikoto simply dropped head first out the third story window of her dorm room, did a couple of somersaults in the air, and then landed on her feet with her arms stretched out like a gymnast.
Uoooh! Truly magnificent, Miss Mikoto! Magnificent! The monkey mouse 'chu'ed furiously, and then displayed a sign over her head with 9.9 written upon it in black marker.
Mikoto rubbed the back of her head shyly. "Um, thanks, Chu-suke."
She skipped over to the other building, and then started to scale the wall, leaping from window ledge to window ledge with ease, sometimes needing to swing herself up over a balcony. She managed to reach the balcony with the drying underwear without breaking a sweat, and took the plastic drying ring down.
"Here you go." Mikoto said showing the monkey mouse on her head the booty. "Which one did you want?"
ALL OF THEM!
"Maah. Greedy, aren't you?" Shrugging, Mikoto carefully pulled the bras and panties from the ring and shoved them down the front her shirt, giving one of the panties to Chu Chu, who rubbed her face against it lovingly. Hoping back onto the balcony railing, Mikoto was about to go, when she heard a very angry shout behind her.
"Mikoto!" Sagisawa Youko-sensei cried in exasperation as she ripped open her balcony door, hellish fury clear on her face. "What are you doing?!"
Chu Chu gave a start of surprise and swallowed the panties she was holding in her paws to hide them. They lodged in her throat unexpectedly, and she turned a deeper shade of purple than normal, eyes bulging.
"Gah!" So surprised was she at being caught, Mikoto slipped on the balcony railing, and before she knew it, she found herself plummeting downwards, head first.
What? Mikoto thought, confusedly. What is this feeling? What happened? Why is the ground coming towards me so quickly?
She slammed roughly in the bushes underneath Youko-sensei's balcony, the back of her head actually hitting the ground with a loud smack.
Everything went black for a moment.
Time ceased to exist.
There was nothing, nothing at all. Just darkness.
And then, Mikoto thought she could hear shouting.
Stunned and dazed, Mikoto opened her eyes and looked blurrily up at the sky. It was a pretty blue, dotted by the odd white cloud, and an errant bird. What... what happened?
She wasn't sure how much time passed, but the shouting got louder, and clearer, until she could almost make out the words. Chu Chu's face popped up in her field of vision. The monkey mouse gave a 'chu?' of inquiry.
Miss Mikoto! Art thou whole?
Blinking a few times, Mikoto turned and realized that several people were staring at her in worry and horror, and it was these folks who were shouting.
"Oi! Minagi! Are you alright?!" Cried one of the boys Mikoto recognized was her classmate.
Mikoto blinked, and then nodded. She sat up and climbed out of the bushes, brushing the sticks and leaves out of her hair and clothes. She looked up and could see Youko-sensei staring down at her with disbelief.
Mikoto smiled weakly up at the nurse. "Sorry about that, Sensei!" She called.
"Mikoto!" Youko-sensei cried, supremely perturbed. "What the hell?! You just fell off of a 4th story balcony! How can you just get up?!"
4th story? Mikoto scratched her head. Huh. That is kinda on the high side... A creepy, crawly unpleasant sensation clawed at the back of her mind, and Mikoto did her best to ignore it. "It's okay, sensei! I'm alright! Don't worry!" To demonstrate her health, she waved to the teacher, and then got down on all fours to bolt away.
Mikoto wasn't sure why she was running, or why she suddenly felt so scared. For some reason, she could remember a confusion conversation from a few weeks back, close to the beginning of summer, when everyone's Hime marks had returned.
"I wished... I wished that Mikoto didn't have to die."
Mikoto frowned. She hadn't understood that conversation at all at the time, and no one had been willing to explain what Mai had meant either. She had wanted to ask her roommate about that several times, but Mai had always looked so uncomfortable, and if it was one thing Mikoto never wanted to do, it was to make Mai sad, so she always let the topic drop.
Mikoto tried to remember back to the fight with the Obsidian Lord. She remembered being injured. She remembered jumping in front of her brother's sword to take a swing meant for Mai. She remembered it hurt a lot, at first, and then, for some reason, it stopped hurting so bad, and she just started getting sleepy.
She wasn't really quite sure what happened after that. She knew they'd defeated her brother, somehow. She could remember everyone crowding around her. She could remember seeing Kagutsuchi standing behind Mai, and fading away. She could remember hearing Miroku, inside her mind, telling her everything was going to be okay.
She remembered Mai screaming at her. "Don't go, Mikoto! Don't go! Please... please... I... I don't want you to die, Mikoto. Please, don't die. Don't... die..."
And she could remember, thinking to herself, hmm... Mai doesn't want me to die. So... so I shouldn't die. That would make Mai sad. I don't want Mai to be sad...
She wasn't completely sure what happened after that, but she remembered thinking to herself, how nice it was that both she and Mai wanted the same thing, and then, somehow, the pain in her middle became a different kind of pain - the familiar pangs of hunger instead.
She really couldn't remember what happened after that.
Mikoto frowned. She had put a lot of distance between herself and the commotion she had caused earlier, so she slowed her four legged run down to a two legged one, and then eventually to a walk, and then, finally, to a stop.
Chu Chu climbed back onto Mikoto's head from where she had fallen.
Miss Mikoto! That was absolutely marvelous Alas, however, I'm afraid I appear to have ingested my panties in my surprise... Please, pray tell, was thou able to keepeth thine winnings?
Mikoto's brow crinkled, feeling a little bit annoyed with her furry friend. "Chu-suke, why do you like underwear so much?!" Even as she asked this, she reached into her shirt and brought out one of the stolen bras to hand to the monkey on top of her head.
Miss Mikoto! How couldst thou even question mine passion? Why, panties are clothing of the gods! Such succulent softness! Such divine craftsmanship! Why, I can remember a time when women wore not such delicateness against their skin, and let me advise thee, twas times dark indeed!"
"You can remember when people didn't use underwear?" Mikoto blinked. "That's... that's got to be..." Mikoto tried to do some simple math in her head and failed miserably. "... a long time ago!" She picked the monkey up off of her head and held her in her palms, staring at her with wide amber eyes.
Verily! Twas many seasons ago, indeed. I am very happy that undergarments have spread as far and wide over rolling hills and passed distant shores as they have in the intervening years!
Mikoto's already massive eyes got even wider. "Chu-suke, how old are you?"
Hmm... I'm afraid I know not the answer to that, Miss Mikoto. The seasons do blur after a while. I can, however, with pride advise thee that a cake tasted is a cake never forgotten, and I have sampled 74,382 birthday cakes in my days, though, I am afraid I am not sure who's day of birth those delectable pastries were intended to mark...
Mikoto looked uncomfortable. "Can... can you not die too?"
I am afraid I doth not quite understand thy query, Miss Mikoto. The monkey mouse cocked her head to the side and gave Mikoto a questioning 'chu'.
Mikoto frowned. "I mean... mmm... I guess what I want to ask is... um... " She thought about it for a while before the right words came to her. "What's it like to live forever?"
Whatever does thou mean?
"I mean..." Mikoto scuffed her shoes against the ground uncomfortably. "I mean, you... you just keep going on and on, right? But the people around you, like, like, Hime, for example. You've been around since she was born, right? You remember when she was a baby, and now she's grown up, and eventually, she's gonna get old, and then... and then she's not always going to be there anymore, right? Won't you miss her?" Mikoto's brow crinkled. "I know I would miss Mai."
Ah! Well, if tis mine mistress that thou speaketh of, I am not so sure that she is one that will move on at the end of this life like all the rest, but yes, I understand thy concern. Worry not, Miss Mikoto. So long as the sun rises in the morning and the moon at night, they shall return to thee. The bonds forged during one's time on earth are not so easily broken while off of it. The same lives, the same souls, forever intertwine, time and again, like helix strands stretching forward forever to eternity. No, worry not, for thine loved ones will return, and you shall have grand adventures again, slaying villainous frogs and winning beautiful undergarments! And until then, there are bananas! Bananas, as far as the eye can see! Oh, canst thou not see it, Miss Mikoto?
Chu Chu leapt on top of Mikoto's head and pointed at the horizon with triumphant 'chu!', and Mikoto got the distinct impression she was supposed to go galloping towards it. She couldn't help but smile, feeling her heart lighten as she got down on all fours and bolted wildly onwards, down the path, and round a corner, swinging around a lamp post once, twice, and three times before flinging herself off with a loud laugh and running some more.
She startled many a classmate with her antics, leap-frogging over some, knocking over others, and narrowly avoiding others.
"Watch it, Mikoto!" Nao cried when the black-haired wild child appeared from out of nowhere and almost ran right through her. It was a last minute dodge that sent Nao spinning like a top instead, avoiding a head on collision.
"Sorry, Nao!" Mikoto said, turning back to laugh at her friend, though she did not stop her joyous journey.
It felt good to run. Everything felt right in the world when the wind was in her hair, and the sun was on her skin, and she could just run as far as her legs could carry her, to see what she would find when she stopped.
Her acrobatics had sent Chu Chu tumbling off her head, and the monkey mouse was now hanging onto one of her braids for dear life. She reached back and grabbed her, bringing her forward to stuff her into a more secure location - the breast pocket of her blazer jacket.
A thousand gratitudes, Miss Mikoto!
Mikoto smiled, even as she ran. By this time, she'd skipped off of the paths of the school entirely, and had made it into the forests, bouncing between the trees, sometimes even off of the tree trunks themselves, or swinging from the branches. "So, you're sure? That Mai will come back to me, Chu-suke? Promise?"
Of course! She hast already done so many times, already, I reckon! With bonds as strong as the one between her's and thee's, this cannot be thine first lifetime together, Miss Mikoto! Why, she may have been a mother, or a sister, or a lover to you, many times before!
Mikoto's eyes widened. "Really? You mean we were friends before?"
Verily! Bonds as tight as thee and thine, will surely last for all eternity, even when comes the time for humanity to leave this planet and head for the stars! Surely, even then, on distant yellow stars, twinkling in this night sky, the soul of Miss Mai will come to intertwine with thee in fellowship again.
Mikoto couldn't help but beam. "That sounds like a lot of fun! I can't wait!"
Chu-suke was right, Mikoto decided. Mai was her most important person ever, and she knew she was very important to Mai too! So, of course, they'll always be friends! Mikoto just had to be patient, and that was gonna be hard, but, for Mai, of course, Mikoto could wait.
And it wasn't like they'd be apart right away either! Mai was strong and super healthy! They'd have at least 70 or 80 years together this time too! And hey! Maybe Mai would have kids! Maybe they could be friends too!
It was then that Mikoto got a phone call. Skidding to a halt, she answered her phone. "Hello?"
"Mikoto?!" It was Mai on the line. "Where are you?! People are telling me you fell off a 4th story balcony! Are you okay?"
Mikoto grinned. "Umph! Better than okay! I feel great! I'm going to have lots of fun with your kids!"
"... ?! Did you hit your head?!"
"I did!" Mikoto replied cheerily, "but I'm okay! I-" She was cut off when a shadow loomed over her. Her eyes went wide.
Holy mother of all that is good and merciful! Chu Chu gave a terrified 'chu!' and hid herself deeper down into Mikoto's blazer jacket pocket.
In front of her stood what looked like a two story tall cross between a helicopter, a crocodile and a body builder. The monster was ocean green in color, and had at least seven glimmering red eyes dotting its face. It saw Mikoto and snarled, making a hissing sound.
"Um… Mai?" Mikoto said into the phone. "I'll call you back. There's a really big Orphan in front of me right now."
The hotel room is dark and still.
Presently, there is a soft click of the door opening, and the shuffling of footsteps, before the door clicks closed again. A single lamp is turned on, and a tawny haired woman can be seen. She puts her luggage on one of the two twin beds and dumps everything out. She stares uncomprehendingly at her personal effects for a long time – a computer, a camera, a cell phone, some clothing, a seashell pendant and a photo album. All she has to her name.
Wordlessly, she steps out of her shoes, and removes her socks. She pulls her sweater over her head and discards it onto the floor. Her skirt, her bra, her panties soon follow suit. She moves into the bathroom, and sits down in the tub, letting the spray from the shower above drench her.
She stays there for a very long time.
Out on the hotel bed, the cell phone beeps once, twice, and three times, unanswered. Her voicemail message takes the call.
"Hi! You've reached Kurusugawa Himeko. I'm not available to take your call right now, so please leave a message after the tone, and I'll get back to you as soon as possible. Thanks!"
*Beep!*
There is a long silence, before a hoarse voice finally speaks.
"... pick up the phone, Himeko. Please."
Another long pause.
"... please."
Another long pause.
"... don't... don't do it like this, Himeko. Not... not like this."
Another long pause.
"... please."
The fourth pause goes a bit too long, and the voice messaging software ends the call, thinking the message over. The communication goes to mailbox, to join the other eight similar messages left by this number.
There is silence in the hotel room.
And then the phone beeps again, with another call. This caller's voice is soft, and calm, but obviously worried.
"... Himeko-chan? It's Tomoyo. I... I know it's none of my business, truly, but, I thought you should know that I've let Oogami-san know about... about what happened. We're all really worried about you, so, wherever you are, please, just... just let one of us know where you are and that you're alright, okay? Please. I'll talk to you soon-"
Even before this call ends, a third call angles to take its place.
This caller is very agitated.
"Himeko, pick up the goddamn phone, you hear me?! NOW!" There was a pause. "You're in Mahoroba, aren't you? We can come get you! Hell, even if you aren't in Mahoroba, we got you. Dammit, Himeko, don't make me have Souma send out the entire force after you, because, so help me god, you know I will! Ah hell, I don't even have to ask, he's halfway down to the station already! Come on, Himeko, pick up!" There was a loud sigh of frustration on the line. "You're in the bathroom, aren't you? Well, when you get out, call me back. Stop making us worry like this. Talk to you soon. Souma and I love you, Himeko. Don't forget that."
A while later, the tawny haired woman comes out of the bathroom, her hair damp, wearing a bathrobe. She picks up her phone and sits down in one of the chairs, facing the window. Pulling her knees up to her chest and wrapping her arms around her legs, she puts the phone on the end table, and on speaker to listen to the messages.
She squeezes her eyes shut tightly as she listens to the three new messages, messages so similar to the dozens she's already received from these same numbers over the last few days.
She reaches out and hesitates for a while, her thumb hovering over the buttons.
She punches in the number of the first caller, and her thumb hovers around the 'call' button for what feels like an eternity. Of all the numbers, she knows it is most important to respond to the first caller, to Juri, sweet Juri, poor Juri, and yet, she does not know if she should return the call or not.
She does not want to hurt her anymore. She does not want to give her false hope. Bad enough that she had not the strength to refuse Juri's last embrace. Bad enough that she'd given in that night. Bad enough that Juri may have construed 'goodbye' to mean 'you may still have a chance...'
Although, with luck, the finality of those three words she'd left on the note could not be mistaken.
Three little words.
'She's the one.'
She had wondered, as she had written those words, if they were too cold to end two years together.
Would 'I'm so sorry' have been better? Or even, 'I loved you'?
No, she thinks. No.
Juri is a fighter and an ounce of hope is all she would need to rip her heart apart fighting for her, a losing battle. One she could never win.
She remembers having broken another's heart similarly before, ages ago, in high school, and at the time, she had not known how cruel she was being to him by returning his calls, by still being his friend. By still showing him kindness. It had taken him that much longer to get over her, because of her continued kindness and affection for him. If not for Mako-chan, she is quite certain Souma's heart would never have healed.
She does not want to do that to Juri.
But neither does Juri deserve this, being walked out on in the middle of the night, her messages unanswered. Perhaps she should let their friends know where she is, and let the news float back to Juri that way? Would that be kinder? But that does not seem right either...
She does not know what to do. Why doesn't she know what to do? Why doesn't she ever seem to know what to do?
Her thumb hovers around the 'call' button... but instead, she deletes the number she's entered, and puts the phone back down on the table. She has lost track of the number of times she has done this. Punch in Juri's number. Wait. Delete Juri's number. Wait.
She sits still for a very long time.
Silence is best, she thinks. Solitude is best, she thinks. There is a certain sort of peace and closure in being cut off clean. She needs to give Juri time to get over her. And, she admits, she needs to give herself time too, to get over Juri, for Juri still has a powerful place in her heart too.
Eventually, the phone begins to ring again. Once, twice, thrice, and voice mail, via speaker.
*BEEP!*
"Did you hear, did you hear? Have you heard the news?"
She sits up at this unexpected message and turns to stare at her phone.
"Someone's ripping apart the universe! Someone's giving the universe and the gods, all 800 million of them, a giant middle finger! Is a Child the cause or the effect of the love between a woman and her most important person? If the Child is no longer a representation of love, but a representation of despair, then what happened to the relationship? You know what I think? I think, oh, crap, what the hey? I totally have the wrong number! Sorry about that!"
The tawny haired woman stares at her phone in disbelief, unable to comprehend what that last call had been about. A prank call, perhaps?
She almost jumps from her seat when the phone rings once more.
There is something different about this call.
Even as she stares at her phone, she can tell that this call... this call is one she must take.
Squeezing her hands into fists, she picks up the phone and finally answers it.
"... hello?"
The person on the other line doesn't say anything.
All she hears is someone swallowing, as though they are having a hard time speaking. "..."
And suddenly, she has a good idea of who could be on the line, though she doesn't know how they got this number.
Her heart clenches. She tries to speak, but the words are lodged in her throat too, and she cannot get them out. She tries again. And again. And eventually, she manages to whisper, "...Chikane-chan...? Is that you?"
The person on the phone remains silent, neither confirming nor denying her identity.
They are both silent on the line, and Himeko knows she needs to says something, anything at all, even something stupid or mundane.
"... I need some time." She finally whispers. "I'm sorry, Chikane-chan. I just need a little bit of tim-."
"Arisugawa-sensei," interrupts the caller on the line, her voice soft, and hesitant, and sad. So very sad.
She freezes.
"...Arisugawa-sensei," says the voice again, "... is a good person."
Her heart twists and squeezes, almost unbearably in her heart. "... she is." She whispers. "But you are too."
"... no." Say the voice, filled with regret. "No, I am not."
And then the line goes dead.
Frantically, her heart racing, she hits 'redial', and 'redial' again, and once more, and again, and again, and again. The calls do not go through.
'The number you are calling, is outside of the service area. Please hang up and try again later.'
Himeko blinks very slowly, as she stares at her phone. And suddenly, even as she stares at it, it buzzes, signalling the arrive of a text message. The message is short:
'Do you want to remember?'
She stares at the message, confused, and disoriented. Frowning, she looks up, and out the window. The soft, festive lights of the amusement park that the hotel has a view of try to sooth her, to no avail, even as she continues to look at them for a long time as she contemplates.
She does not notice when her photo album is quietly picked up from the bed, and spirited away.
She doesn't realize that it is gone, until the next morning, when she goes looking for it, and cannot locate it.
AUTHOR'S NOTES:
The chapter is out earlier than expected because I forgot yesterday was a holiday! Yay! XD
Oh, Natsuki, how you could possibly think you were not gay from the start of this fic, I am not sure... =P
As a heads up, I think the next chapter will more properly be rated 'M'. I don't think the fic, overall, is M though, as, I think, the sheer volume of mature content vs not will make this fic fall back onto the T side. Still, I thought I should give folks a heads up about that.
And, to be perfectly transparent – one of the scenes is Shiznat, but the other one is Jurimeko. I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry. But I feel like this is important. It's just... I feel like I'd be doing these characters I love a grave disservice if I don't even try to address the delicate matter raised in KnM canon that still bothers me to this day. :(
So, I'll apologize in advance if that is not your cup of tea. I think that scene is one of those, 'I just have to write this' scenes, even if no one wants to read it.
The next chapter should be out between April 10-April 13...
Cheers,
jen-chan
jen-chan-shaw. livejournal. com
OMAKE I: Cow Calls
[HIMEKO is sitting in her hotel room, hideously depressed and staring out the windows at the amusement park. The phone rings beside her. She lets it go to voicemail.]
VOICEMAIL: Hi! You've reached Kurusugawa- Beep! [The caller has clicked 'go straight to voicemail']
CALLER: Moooou
HIMEKO: [Sweatdrops and stares at her phone. Hesitantly picks it up.] Who's this?
CALLER: Moooooou
HIMEKO: What is this? Some kind of sick joke?
CALLER: [Mooing ebbs to a soft, sinister whisper] ooooore...
HIMEKO: What?
CALLER: ... mooooooooore cooooooooooooowbeeeeeeell...
HIMEKO: ... [Hangs up and shivers]
OMAKE II: A Serious Mai-Hime Style Preview Of Next Episode
[There are no clips. Just JURI and HIMEKO standing in front of a black screen together, reading scripts.]
JURI: Next time, on Revolutions, a Kannazuki no Miko, Revolutionary Girl Utena and Mai Hime X-over... [she looks up from the script uncomfortably] Really? Seriously? We're going there?
[The CAMERA ANGLE nods up and down.]
JURI: Are you really sure that's a good idea? Do you not remember the reaction to 'Gala Revelations?' I mean, wow, if you haven't been lynched already... [She looks over at HIMEKO worriedly.]
HIMEKO: [Read the script with an expression half determined and half scared]... Um... I think... I think this might be important, Juri-chan. For me. Tough, but, important.
JURI: [Sighs] Well... alright. Then please stay tuned for the next chapter of Revolutions, Chapter 14 – 'Flashbacks'