Chapter 22

... Pinch me ...

It was now Tom's time to take the stand. He approached the stand slowly to allow himself as much time as possible to calm down his racing heart rate. As he sat down he tried to maintain his usual look of indifference, hoping that his tired appearance didn't betray him and let them know he would be rather easy to break if they pushed a little.

He knew his nervousness was irrational, as today was just like any other case. Doug had treated it that way so why couldn't he? Recently however he had been struggling with even the most simple cases, his anxiety about being in the stands increasing each time. He simply hated the scrutinising eyes coming at him from all directions, it reminded him too much of the time when he stood in that very room and fought for his own freedom. Today he was determined to keep it together, unlike when he had when they arrested Lawrence and unlike when he stood up here the last time.

"Officer Hanson, considering you spent a lot of time with the defendant, I'm sure we would all be interested to know what you think about Former Captain Lawrence's testimony?"

"I believe he's done a very convincing job of portraying his remorse to all of you today. However I also believe this portrayal of guilt is not honest. The man I got to know and the man behind todays façade isn't sorry for what he did, he's sorry he got caught,"

"Again relying on your experience with the issue and by thinking about yourself and your colleagues how easy do you think it would be to get caught up in this world?"

"We are exposed to it constantly so I suppose theoretically it would be easy. And becoming disillusioned with the work, sure, I get it. " he said solemnly hating how easily he related with the man he was testifying against. He was also disappointed in his lack of a real answer, as he knew that the accusatory lawyer would be expecting better from him than 'I suppose so'.

So when the lawyer didn't continue, he tried to, "But that doesn't mean we should feel sorry for him or show him our pity. Most officers if they've had enough leave and I don't know become a car salesman or something," he said.

Then suddenly he felt a rage he thought had been put out months ago threatening to flare up and disintegrate his calm exterior.

"Because once you have seen the damage these drugs can do, how it can ruin a person's life, devastate families, leaving parents childless as well as destroying neighbourhoods forever there is no way any decent person would willingly become a part of the problem. No decent person would be able to stand by and watch it happen, let alone encourage and take part in this ugly underworld. Guys like him, they don't know what it really means to be a cop, they make me sick," he said looking in Lawrence's direction with his new found spark, showing that he was no longer intimidated by him.

"He knew the conditions going in. Nobody becomes a cop with the aspirations to be rich. You do it to make a real difference, to make our society a safer place. So don't feel sorry for him because he thinks he didn't get paid enough. Don't feel sorry for him because he got bored of his job. Feel sorry for him because he doesn't value the ability to be able to save someone from being robbed, or from a life of abuse, or even the ability to save someone's life."

After this little passionate outburst Tom answered the rest of the questions rather smoothly, before he knew it, it was time for the defence lawyer to have his time to play with the witness,"

"Officer Hanson is it true you are currently on suspension?"

"Well, no not exactly, I've been forced to take some time from field work,"

"Ok, and has this been brought on by your actions in this case?"

"Well no, I mean yes, not really it's more to do with some personal issues I'm sorting through," he said a little flustered and clearly annoyed.

"Do you care to share them with us?" Tom looked over at Doug helplessly.

"No there um, they are as I said, personal, besides I don't really see how this has anything to do with the case,"

"It has something to do with the case if it means the officer working it wasn't fit for work. As I'm guessing these 'personal issues' have something to do with the time you sent incarcerated? Just a wild guess?"

"Objection," Called the other lawyer, "This is irrelevant sir, he is trying to tarnish the officers character,"

"Get to the point," replied the judge.

"If you remember I was proven innocent so can we please get on with discussing the case," Tom provided bluntly.

"That's right officer Hanson you were proven innocent, but you were jailed even though there was no solid evidence against you. So I would have thought you of all people would believe in not condemning anyone before we are certain of their guilt?"

"I uh, I believe that is what all people of the law strive for, to put the right people away,"

"I believe you also ran away and admitted guilt to the crime in the heat of the moment isn't that right?"

"Uh well, I was frightened, confused,"

"He was also frightened," the lawyer said interrupting a flustered Hanson.

"Look I don't know what you're playing at but I don't appreciate you trying to place me in the same boat as him. What happened in my trial doesn't change the fact that Lawrence is guilty, he admitted his guilt and had all the motive in the world. So if you're not going to ask me anything else regarding the case I think I'll sit back down," he said before pushing himself off his seat forcefully and striding back to his place next to Doug.

'Hey it could have been worse' Doug mouthed at him slapping him on the back. He was sure it could have been, but that didn't mean it was any less horrible. Or that it wasn't like his nightmares were playing out in real life or that he wanted to melt into his chair and become invisible any less.

The lawyers both made there closing statements and then finally the hearing was done and the jury had gone off to deliberate. They returned quickly and the verdict was handed to the judge with everyone eyes in the room following it.

"On the charge of carrying out the sale and distribution of an illegal substance the defendant is found, guilty. On the charge of the murder of Jeffrey Benton the defendant is found, guilty," the Judge then paused and took of his glasses.

Mr. Lawrence I not believe you are remorseful for your actions and in the sentencing this will be reflected. However I also have to consider the lack of solid evidence provided. So regarding these factors Mr. Lawrence, you will be sentenced to life imprisonment.

Tom and Doug looked at each other with relief. "We did it man," Doug offered in a hushed tone slapping his partner on the back jovially.

"Thank god man I, I think I would have killed him myself if he got away with this," he said in a playful tone that was contradicted by his deadpan expression.

"You would have to wait in line my friend," Doug said also struggling to hide his sincerity.

With that both of their attention was diverted to Mathew who was causing a commotion at the back of the court, saying something undecipherable through his tears before running out of the door.

"Looks like he'd be first in line though," Doug said grinning at his own joke before he turned back to Hanson only to see him burning holes into his head in disapproval.

"No?" Doug said his expression turning to one filled with fear.

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