A Debate

Fili was in a river of emotions that constantly rolled over him. He was so in love with his beautiful Thora. She was everything a lad could hope for in a lass. Kind, funny, strong, wise, a good home maker, a good fighter and he suspected she would be a fine lover. He thanked his maker for her.

But they had fought more over the last six weeks than they ever had in the decades they had known each other. It was only one subject, though, that they fought over - their wedding. Thora wanted to get married before Fili left for Erebor. Fili wanted to wait until they were there and in their kingdom again.

"If we marry in Erebor, it will be the grandest of places and I will be able to give you the finest of everything. Beautiful jewels to weave into your hair and clothes, jewelry to adorn your beautiful neck and hands, and I'm guessing there would be a home for us more grand than we could ever imagine," Fili had said.

Thora had sighed. "Fili, I understand why you want to wait. It would be lovely to be married there and be dressed in the finest cloth and live in the finest home with probably a nice, big bed. I would love to see you dressed as a prince and be surrounded by your court, but Fili, I love you just as you are and I don't want to wait." Thora's hands had moved to his cheeks and she rubbed her fingers along his jaw line. "If we married now, we would have six lovely weeks to be together before you go. Perhaps I would conceive a child. Don't you think it would be good that if anything happens to you, the line of Durin would endure?"

"Thora, you are to be my wife and the mother to our family, not simply a vessel to create heirs," Fili was hurt and upset.

"But I want this. I want our child. A little piece of you with me always."

Fili shook his head. "I won't leave you alone with a child."

"I won't be alone. Your mother will help me," Thora pleaded.

He was so torn. He wanted to marry Thora now. He wanted to wait. He wanted her to have their child now and he wanted to wait so his children, the next kings of Erebor, could be born there, in Erebor.

"Even if I don't conceive," Thora had said, "Don't you want this time before you leave for us to spend as husband and wife? Don't you want to know the love that only spouses can share?" She had blushed when saying this, her maidenly innocence burning in her cheeks.

"Of course I want that," Fili had scooted closer to her, his arms around her back. Yes, he wanted that. His body twitched at the very thought. "But if we marry, then we are bonded, both in mind and body."

"I know. I want that. Don't you?"

"Well yes," Fili had stuttered, "but what if I should die? If we are bound to one another, then you are a widow with no chance of marrying again. You are so young and beautiful. You should be free to live a full life, marry another, have children with another. Not live your life as a lone widow."

"Fili, Joli's son!" Thora had jumped up and yelled, "I should cut you down with my ax for you even suggesting something like that!" His normally quiet lass was now showing the famous fierceness of a dwarrowdam scorned and she bellowed at him.

For a moment, he feared her like he feared his mother. Oh yes, she would make a fine wife and mother. Strong, protective and not to be mocked. He almost laughed, but then he would have felt her ax. He felt ashamed of his words to her.

"You seem to think that my love for you is so insubstantial that I could simple leave you for another?" She snarled at him for a moment before she regained her composure and went back to her normal self. "Fili, I would bind myself to no one else. Whether we marry or not before you leave, if you should die, I am a widow either way."

Blast this woman! Fili was torn and angry. He should be protecting her and instead he felt like he was tearing her in half. Why did Thorin choose to go on this quest now? Why not a year from now? Why did Thora have to be so strong willed? She was acting like a daughter of Durin.

"Hey, Fee?" Kili came up behind him. "I thought I'd find you here."

Fili was not startled by Kili. They had the ability to find the other when one of them was upset. They knew all their hiding places. All their thoughtful spots. Kili sat down next to him.

Fili sighed. "After my last argument with Thora, I had to get away to think. I didn't even realize I had come here." He was in his favorite spot in the forest near his home. He and Kili had discovered this place before they were twenty. It was a large rock at the bank of the river. He would sit there and stare into the swirling waters when he needed to think. He looked around, letting memories of his childhood swirl, just like the water. "We had a lot of fun here, didn't we?" Fili asked.

"Many picnics, many spars, many swims on hot summer days, and one poor tree, nearly dead from being used as target practice for all of my arrows," Kili looked up at the half dead pine. "You talk like we will never return."

"We may not. If Uncle is successful, we will live in Erebor for the rest of our lives. And if we die," Fili let his words hang.

"You can't think like that, Fili," Kili said. "It only makes things harder," he whispered. "Try to be excited. We're going on a great quest with Uncle."

They sat quietly for a long while, listening to the river and the birds. "I know what thoughts trouble your mind, Fee," Kili finally said.

Fili chuckled. "Am I thinking that loud?"

"Yes, you are. Just marry her, Fili. We have six weeks left before we leave. Uncle goes next week and we'll not see him again until we get to The Shire. Let him marry you."

"But, there's so many reasons," Fili started, but Kili cut him off.

"But nothing. Don't over think this. Thora is smart. She knows what she's getting herself into and she wants it. I don't understand why she wants it. She's been living with us for years, has seen what you look like first thing in the morning and she still wants to marry you."

Fili gave Kili a playful shove.

"Seriously, Fee. Don't put it off any longer. Enjoy what time you have together right now. It might be a long time before you see her again."

Fili leaned into his brother's side. "Thanks, Kee."

"It's what brothers are for."

Thorin was more than happy to marry his nephew to his namesake and adopted daughter. Due to the shortness of time and Thorin needing Fili's help with the final preparations before Thorin would leave, they decided to marry the following day. It would give Fili and Thora a few days together before Fili was needed again.

Dis and Thora went into a whirlwind of baking and Fili and Kili went out to the closest family, cousins and friends to invite them to the ceremony. They also helped Thorin move his belongings into Dis's home. He only had a week before he left and offered Fili and Thora his home to live in until Fili left, which they gratefully accepted.

The marriage ceremony was a simple, but joyful event. Everyone ate well and laughed much. They also saw it as a last party together, as a big family, before the quest. While no one expressed these thoughts, they all knew it might be the last time they would all be together in this life.