Fili – 13, Kili - 8

Joli and Dis sat together, staring into the fire; long after their sons had gone to bed. Dis was worn out. Fili and Kili were so busy and it took all her attention to make sure they didn't hurt themselves or something in the house. Fili would start weapons training in two years and Dis knew that day couldn't come fast enough. At least then, she would get one active child out of the house and doing something productive. She wasn't sure how she would keep Kili busy during that time, but now wasn't the time to worry about that. Her sons were pure bundles of energy and she was tired.

Joli pulled Dis close and let her lean against his chest. He pressed his lips to the top of her head and kissed her. He inhaled the smell of her hair and sighed. She sighed and he felt her relax against him.

"You need time away," he said.

Dis chuckled. "Yes. I'll leave the boys with their nursemaid tomorrow while I travel to visit my family in the Iron Hills, shall I?"

Joli just squeezed his hands around her a little tighter. "Would you have really had a nursemaid for the boys had you been in Erebor?"

"Yes, there would have been a nursemaid or two to help take care of them while I attended to royal duties. My brothers and I had several. Of course, by the time we were forced from Erebor, I was the only one still under a nursemaid's care. My brothers were in weapons training."

"I can't even imagine what you have been forced to give up. I often feel inadequate at how little I can provide you, my princess," Joli sighed.

Dis shifted and looked into her husband's brown eyes. "My darling, you are not inadequate. You are a fine provider an attentive husband and a good father. I remember very little of what we left behind. My life was out in the wilds of the world until I came here and met you. You have provided me with a home, a good life and two sons. Had I grown up in Erebor, I would have had to marry some stuffy Lord and we might have had children, but they wouldn't have been Fili and Kili. For all the trouble they are, they are wonderful and I wouldn't trade them for the world."

"Still, I think you could do with a little time away. We could travel to see my kin in Ered Atrev."

"And what would we do with the trouble makers?" Dis smiled affectionately.

"Uncle Thorin, of course."

Dis snorted. "Thorin? Are we talking about my brother Thorin? Oh my, no, I don't think that would be a good idea."

"For who? Thorin or the boys?"

Dis thought about it for a moment. "I don't know." She laughed.

"Well, think about it," Joli said. If you wish, we could go to Ered Atrev for a few weeks."

"Now, are you sure you'll be alright, Thorin?" Dis asked.

"Don't worry about a thing, Dis. I can do this. You go and enjoy your holiday." Thorin said. Kili was crying in his arms.

"If you really need me, just send a messenger or word by raven, if you have to, and I'll come straight home." Dis was frowning.

"Dis, it will be alright. Don't worry. If I need help, I've got Dwalin," Thorin smiled.

Dis exhaled sadly. "My Kili, Amad loves you. Please don't cry. I'll be back very soon." Kili leaned forward and threw himself into Dis's arms. "Oh, Joli, I can't leave. Kili's too young."

"He'll be fine. We just need to go," Joli said.

"Amad?" Fili stepped up. "I'll take care of Kili. You don't have to worry about him."

Dis stood straight and looked at her eldest son. He stood tall and confident. Almost like a golden haired Thorin. Dis knew at that moment that they would be well. Fili would never let anything happen to his brother. She kissed Fili's forehead. "I won't worry, knowing you are with him." She gave Kili one last hug and kiss and put him down on the ground, next to Fili. Kili cried, but Fili put his arms around Kili's shoulders and held him. She went to her pony and Thorin helped her up. They started to walk away and Dis turned around to see Fili and Kili waving at her. Tears started to form in her eyes. As much trouble as those boys caused, she would miss them terribly. She had never spent so much as a day away from them. She gave them one last wave and turned back to see her husband smiling at her.

"Don't worry about a thing," he said.

"I'm a mother. It's my job to worry about everything," Dis replied.

"How about you worry about this boy," he pointed at himself.

Dis smiled. Two weeks without the boys and all the time with her beloved. Yes, this could be a very nice journey.

Thorin was bathing Kili for the second time that day. How the lad ended up completely filthy twice was beyond him. They hadn't even left the house today. He scrubbed at Kili's hair, getting the mud clots out. Kili was singing.

"Lad, keep clean the rest of the day," Thorin said as he poured a bucked of warm water over Kili's head.

"Alright, Uncle Thorin," Kili chirped. He dressed the lad in the last clean thing he could find. He would have to wash the clothes. He hated washing clothes and hadn't planned on having to do it for several days yet, but Kili had made waiting impossible.

"Fili," Thorin called. His eldest nephew came into the washroom. "Try and keep him out of trouble while I wash these clothes."

"Will you read to us later, Uncle?" Fili asked.

"I will tonight, before bed, if I'm not up too late washing your brother or his clothes again," Thorin growled.

Fili did as he was told and kept Kili clean, but the same couldn't be said for the sitting room. With the boys help, they managed to straighten the sitting room, eat something that was somewhat decent for a supper and finally he had them in their sleeping clothes, ready for bed. Thorin sat down on the couch, a book in his hand. Kili and Fili climbed up onto him. Kili settled himself between Thorin's legs and Fili was hanging off his right shoulder. Thorin opened the book and found a story. He read to them, pausing periodically as Kili had many questions to ask.

The story didn't last long. Kili got restless, so Thorin picked him up in his arms and Fili gripped Thorin's neck and hung onto his back. Thorin, half choking from Fili's grip, carried the boys to their room and plopped them down in their beds. Kili needed to go to the toilet once more. Fili forgot to hang up his sword properly. Kili needed a drink of water. Fili's feet were cold. And after what felt like forever, Thorin finally managed to get away, threatening them that if they didn't go to sleep, he would have Dwalin come over and sit on them. This made Kili laugh, but Fili laid unmoving in his bed, showing a healthy dose of fear for the large dwarf.

He closed their door and went back to the untidy sitting room. He was exhausted. How in the world did Dis do this every day? He sighed. That, he supposed, is why she was having her little holiday.

"Uncle Thorin! Uncle Thorin! Fili's got pushed by the big lads," Kili ran into the bakery where Thorin was purchasing some bread for their meal. He ran out of the bakery, just in time to see a couple of youth running down the road, and Fili lying in the dirt in the middle of the road. He sat up and rubbed at his face. Thorin got there and saw the blood trickling down Fili's nose.

"Lad, are you alright?" Thorin asked.

"Yes, Uncle," Fili wouldn't look at Thorin.

He helped Fili to stand. "What happened?"

"Nothing," Fili mumbled. Thorin would get the truth out of him, but here, in the middle of the square wasn't the best place, so he picked up his things and handed Fili a bit of cloth to hold over his nose until they could get home.

Kili was over excited. "Are you alright Fili? Does it hurt? Can I see? Why is the blood coming out of your nose? You got dust all over you. Those boys were mean. You were brave, Fili." Kili's constant chatter was starting to annoy Thorin, but they were soon home. Without asking any more, Thorin led Fili to the washroom and wet down a rag. He wiped at Fili's face, getting all the blood off. It didn't look too bad, whatever had happened. He sent Kili to play in his room for a while.

"Now, can you tell me what happened? Why did you get into a fight with those big lads?" Thorin asked as gently as he could.

Fili wouldn't look at Thorin in the face. "They were saying mean things about Kili," Fili said. "I think they called him a really bad word."

"What word, Fili?" Thorin asked. When Fili wouldn't look at Thorin, he knew the boy was afraid of being punished for repeating the word. "You don't need to worry. I'm not going to be angry with you. I am asking you to simply tell me what they said."

Fili leaned in close to Thorin's ear and whispered. Thorin's face turned red. It was horrifying and comical at the same time to hear such a foul word coming from the lips of his young heir. He coughed. "Don't you go repeating that word again," he looked at Fili's scared eyes. "It's a very bad word and is very crude to say. It was wrong of any one to say that in front of you, but is that what they really said about Kili?"

Fili nodded.

"Do you know what that word means?" Thorin asked.

Fili shook his head.

"Good. You don't need to know. Not until you're older anyway." Thorin sighed. "And after they said that about Kili, what happened?"

"I told them to stay away from my brother. They pushed me first, Uncle Thorin, but I pushed back. They were a lot bigger and one of them hit my nose and pushed me down."

"Fili, you're a good lad, standing up for Kili like that. I'm going to have to show you how to block punches so you can't get hurt like that again."

"Really? You'd show me how to fight?" Fili's face turned up in a smile.

"Well, it doesn't look like your Adad's taught you anything about fighting, so I guess I'd better. Now, I'm going to say this because your mother would want me too, but it's better not to fight. And, as a prince to the line of Durin, we should be above petty fights in the street."

"But they insulted Kili!" Fili's confrontation with the bigger boys wasn't a mere petty fight. Nothing that involved standing up for his brother's honor was petty.

"I'm not saying what you did was wrong, lad. We have a place in our society and we must do all we can to uphold our place and rank. However, a son of Durin doesn't let his honor be tarnished by those who would try and spread false information. You, as a prince must stand up for your honor and you, as a big brother, must stand up for your little brother and that's just what you did. All that being said, I'll tell you that I've gotten into more than my fair share of fights, so I'm going to teach you how to fight. I suspect this will not be your last."

"I can learn," Fili said.

"I know you can, but not yet. We'll eat, clean up, and before bed, I'll teach you some moves," Thorin said.

"Will you teach Kili, too?" Fili asked.

"Of course. The lad needs to learn how to fight, same as you," Thorin nodded.

"Izzy, I can't thank you enough for keeping the lads today," Thorin said as he picked up his nephews from her house. He had an emergency come up and was needed to help take care of a wolf pack that was getting too close to their village. It was his duty to go, but he couldn't take Fili and Kili along with him and Bombur's good wife had offered her assistance.

"It was no trouble, Lord Thorin," Izzy smiled. "They fit right in here." She rubbed at her swollen stomach while looking at her three young sons. "Actually, Fili and Kili kept my little ones so occupied with play that they couldn't get under my feet while I was putting up some raspberries."

Thorin nodded. "If I can repay the favor, all you need do is ask."

"It's been my pleasure," Izzy smiled.

"Give Bombur my greeting," he said, taking the boys by the hand. "Lads, what do you say to Mistress Izzy?"

"Bye Mistress Izzy," Fili bowed. "Thank you for letting us play."

"And for the cookies," Kili smiled.

"You are welcome here anytime, boys," she smiled. They left and headed home.

"Did you really kill all the wolves?" Fili asked as they walked home.

"We did. They're not going to threaten us any longer."

"What about their pelts?" Fili asked.

"They've been taken to the tanner to be prepared for the tailor," Thorin answered. He needed a bath. And an ale. Kili was talking. Thorin sighed. Kili was always talking and if he wasn't talking, he was asking questions. Had it really only been six days since Dis had left? He sighed again. They would get through this.

"Odo said their mom's going to have another baby," Kili said.

Thorin grunted in response.

"Why didn't Amad have four babies?" Kili asked.

"Because you two are enough trouble for ten dwarflings," Thorin smiled. They reached the house. "Listen, I need to take a bath. I want you two to keep out of trouble. Alright?"

"Alright, Uncle Thorin," Fili said.

Thorin didn't worry about Fili. He would obey Thorin, but Kili was a whole other story. "That means you stay in the house, Kili."

Kili's face fell. "Alright," he said.

Thorin went to the washroom and heated up some water. Normally he would have done this after the boys had gone to bed for the night, but he was covered in wolf blood and mud. He bathed quickly and was pleased to find his nephews sitting in the sunshine under a window. Fili was reading and Kili was drawing on Fili's slate with chalk.

"Look, Uncle Thorin!" Kili said. It was a picture of two large, round dwarves and three dwarflings. "It's Odo's family!" Bombur and his signature beard were easy to spot.

"Nice work, Kili," Thorin said.

"Is the baby really inside Mistress Izzy's tummy?" Kili asked. "Ouch!" he cried when Fili hit him in the chest. "What? I only want to know."

Thorin looked wide-eyed at Kili. "Um, well, yes, it is." Thorin hoped to Mahal that that was enough of an answer to satisfy Kili, but of course, he knew it wouldn't be.

"How did it get in there? Did she eat it?" Kili asked.

"No, Kili. She did not eat a baby," Thorin groaned.

"But then, how did it get there? Does Mister Bombur have a baby in his tummy too?" Kili's questions continued.

"No. Bombur's a dwarrow. Only dams can have babies," Thorin said. "Now, how about I find us some dinner?"

Kili followed Thorin into the kitchen. "How did the baby get in her tummy, Uncle?"

Thorin sighed and ran his hand over his face. Why did these things happen to him? "It grew there Kili."

"Like an apple tree?"

"No."

Fili had come in, clearly interested, if embarrassed about it. Had Dis told them nothing about the facts of life?

"Does Amad have a baby in her tummy?"

"No."

"Why not? She's a dam like Mistress Izzy."

"Because she doesn't, that's why," Thorin grumbled.

"How will they get the baby out?"

Thorin groaned. "Kili, these questions are for your Amad and Adad to answer. Do not ask me about it again."

"But will they get the baby out or will it stay there forever?" Kili asked.

"Kili," Thorin growled. "The baby will not stay in her forever, but I will tell you no more. You ask your Adad when he gets back and he'll tell you all about it." Thorin grinned to himself. Yes. Let Joli explain where babies come from to Kili and Fili.

The boys were in bed. In the kitchen, Thorin plopped an ale down in front of Dwalin, then he sat down with his own ale in hand. Only three more days until Dis and Joli would be home. Thorin was ready. He had a new respect for Dis as a mother and all mothers. Taking care of Fili and Kili was hard work. Fili was helpful, but too he was very young, and was the cause of as much trouble as Kili.

Dwalin chuckled. "Long week?"

"Has it ever been," Thorin sighed. "Dis can't get back soon enough."

"Little rug rats giving you trouble?"

"I don't guess they've been too much trouble, but their energy astounds me. How can they keep going for so long? They are always in need of something. I caught Fili, holding Kili over a rock's edge by his feet so Kili could pick some berries."

Dwalin laughed. "Fili wouldn't let anything happen to Kili."

"I know he wouldn't intentionally," Thorin said, "but he doesn't always think first."

"They're young. I remember Frerin sneaking into the kitchens once on a dare from you. What happened again? The cook thought him a mountain rat and nearly beat him with a broom."

Thorin smiled slyly. "If he had been a little quieter, we would have gotten that cake."

Dwalin laughed again.

"Several days ago, Kili actually asked me where babies come from," Thorin said.

"And, what did you tell him?"

"I told him to ask Joli," Thorin answered. "Kili's got a long memory. It will probably be the first words out of his mouth as soon as Dis and Joli arrive home."

"You should have told him the truth. Shock the daylights out of the lad," Dwalin offered.

Thorin shook his head. "I value my life too much," he said. "Dis would skin me alive if I did that."

They drank their ales and talked and Dwalin had many good laughs over hearing Thorin tell the tales of Fili and Kili's antics for the past two weeks.

"Uncle?" Fili's quiet voice called out. Thorin stood up and went to the sitting room. Fili was standing there in something of a daze. His night shirt was slightly twisted and his hair was a little wild.

"Fili," Thorin glared at his nephew. "You know better than to be up right now."

"But Kili's not in bed," Fili looked a little worried.

"What do you mean he's not in bed?" Thorin rushed to the boy's room and looked in. The beds were empty. He went to Dis's room, where he was staying while she was gone, but Kili wasn't there either. "Where is he? We've been sitting here since you went to bed. He didn't go outside. We would have heard him."

Great, Kili was missing. Thorin, Dwalin and Fili started searching the house. Under beds, in the washroom, everywhere they could think. Thorin was about to start a village wide search when he heard a strange noise from the kitchen. He went back in and looked around. Only one ale was sitting on the table and it was Dwalin's. There was a sloshy hiccup and Thorin got down on his hands and knees and looked under the table.

Kili was there, Thorin's ale was in his little hands.

"Hi, Uncle Fworin," Kili hiccupped and then he rolled over laughing.

Thorin groaned and Dwalin fell to the floor in laughter.

"Hi Fi," hiccup, "wi," Kili smiled while trying to sit up again. "I was pwaying hide and," hiccup, "seek. I'm the winner!" He started laughing again.

Try as he might, Thorin could not hold back his smile any longer. It was a sight he never should have seen and he knew his life was forfeit to Dis now anyway, so he laughed. Kili was drunk.

"I don't think he drank much," Thorin grabbed Kili by the ankle. "I didn't have much left in my tankard." He started to pull on the lad's leg. Kili squealed and laughed at being pulled out of his hiding spot by his leg.

"Oh!" Kili's eyes were wide when he came out from under the table. "Why is Smaug here?" He yelled and tried to crawl back under the table. Thorin grabbed him again and hauled him out. "No! No! I don't want Smaug to get me! Save me, Fiwi!" Kili ran to his brother and fell against Fili's chest, which sent them both flying backwards.

"Oof," Fili grunted. "Get off of me, Kili. You stink!"

Kili started laughing again.

"Oh this is bad," Thorin said. "The last thing in the world I want to deal with tomorrow is an eight year old with a hangover."

Dwalin barked with laughter.

"Oh I don't know where babies go," Kili sang, "but I don't care today. I'll go up a tree and throw apples at Fee and then I'll dance all day!" Kili twirled around the sitting room. He stopped suddenly and held his hands to his stomach. "Uh oh," he said. "I don't feel so good."

"Right!" Thorin picked up Kili and ran with him to the washroom. They made it just in time for Kili to vomit into the toilet.

Dwalin was still laughing. "Oh, now the fun really begins! I'll see you later, laddie. Thanks for the show."

"Oh no you don't," Thorin grabbed Dwalin by the neck. "You're going to stay here with me and help."

"I will not!" Dwalin growled.

"Yes, you will, or I'll tell Dis you gave him the ale," Thorin growled back.

Dwalin blanched slightly. He knew better than to cross Dis when it came to her sons. "Cheater," Dwalin grumbled.

"Fili, run and get me some rags," Thorin said. Fili did as he was told. "Dwalin, go clean up the mess under the table and wash the dishes." He heard Dwalin grumbling about not being a dish maid as he walked away. Thorin stayed with Kili, who was being sick again. When he was done, Kili was crying.

Thorin did feel bad. He never meant for Kili to get ahold of his drink. He wished he had notice Kili slipping into the kitchen. He couldn't help but be impressed that the little tyke had slipped past both him and Dwalin. Thorin would teach him tracking when they got older. He might have a talent for it. But for now, Thorin sighed and sat on the floor, holding Kili until he fell asleep.

Fili went back to bed and Dwalin, after doing the cleaning he had been asked, reappeared in the doorway.

"Is there anything else?" he said with surprising gentleness.

Thorin shook his head. "No, we'll be alright. For the last ten days, I've been waiting for Dis to get home. Now, I'm glad she won't be back for another three. As long as she doesn't come home early, we'll be just fine by the time she makes it back."

"And what will you tell her when Kili lets slip that he drank some of your ale?" Dwalin asked with a smirk.

"I won't stick around long enough to find out. As soon as she's home, I'm leaving for Mordor. I hear they need blacksmiths and it's got to be better there than being here with an angry Dis."

Dwalin laughed. Kili squirmed and moaned. Thorin glared at Dwalin to keep quiet.

"I'll check in on ya tomorrow," Dwalin said.

Thorin could only nod as he held Kili close to him. It was going to be a long night.

The morning, it turned out, was actually worse. Kili had a dreadful headache and whined non-stop. Thorin had him drink some willow bark tea and eat toast to try and help with the headache. He also laid out a blanket a shady spot under a tree and encouraged Kili to sleep, telling him the sleep and fresh air would do him good. Fili hovered quietly, doing whatever Thorin needed. He kept a worried eye over Kili and sat next to him, reading his book while Kili slept.

By evening, Kili was back to normal and it was as if nothing had happened to him. Fili still looked at him with a concerned eye, as if he might start to act funny and get sick again. Before bed, Thorin picked up the boys and settled down on the couch with them. It had become their nightly ritual, just before going to sleep, that Thorin read a story to them. Kili tucked himself on Thorin's chest and Fili along Thorin's right arm.

He had considered lecturing them on the evils of drinking ale before they were of age, but he decided they had been punished enough. Kili certainly wouldn't forget his lesson in a hurry and Fili had seen enough to take the lesson to heart. So instead, Thorin read them a story and then tucked them into bed.

"Boys, about what happened last night," Thorin sighed. "It's probably best if we don't mention this to your Amad. At least, not for another twenty years or so."

They agreed.

Dis came home three days later, expecting to find her home a disaster, her sons dirty and half naked, and her brother an absolute mess. But what she came home too was a mostly clean home, clean children, dressed in their day clothes and Thorin smiling. He looked a little worse for the wear and slightly sleep deprived, but he was smiling and that was rare.

"Welcome home," he said, holding the door open for her.

Her sons came running in and crashed into her body, giving her the biggest hugs.

"Did you boys have fun?" Dis asked. The boys nodded and both started talking at the same time about the fun they had had. Dis caught a few words – wolves, Odo, stories, bloody nose, blocking punches, and eating a baby. She laughed. "You'll have to tell me all about it later."

"You'd better let me talk to you first," Thorin mumbled, thinking about when Fili learned a colorful new word. He might have to explain the baby eating, too.

"Adad," Kili tugged at his father's tunic. "Where do babies come from?"

Dis and Joli looked at each other in horror and Thorin could only laugh.