Fragments of Us
Disclaimer: This story is based on characters and situations created and owned by JK Rowling, various publishers including but not limited to Bloomsbury Books, Scholastic Books and Raincoast Books, and Warner Bros., Inc. No money is being made and no copyright or trademark infringement is intended.
Chapter 3 – Tea at Midnight
Kate busied herself making tea as Remus accompanied Dumbledore upstairs to finish their conversation. She had just brought the kettle and two mugs to the table when Remus reappeared.
"So," he began, accepting a steaming mug from Kate and settling himself in the chair opposite hers. "Is it just Dumbledore's wishful thinking or are you really back for good?"
"You certainly don't beat about the bush, do you?" she said wryly.
Remus chuckled quietly, but said nothing.
Kate sighed. "Voldemort's back, which means that to defeat him, Dumbledore needs every witch and wizard he can recruit. I'm an Auror. I fought with you all in the original Order and I'll fight with you again in this one. I'm in it for the long haul. 'For good'? Remus, certainly you know how tenuous that can be."
"Maybe. Doesn't really answer my question, though, does it?" Remus looked at her over the rim of his mug.
It was Kate's turn to chuckle. "Still not letting me get away with anything, are you?" After a moment, she turned serious and looked at him closely. "Look, I don't know what's going to happen any more than you do. It doesn't sound like we've learned anything since the last time, does it? For one thing, the same cast of characters is working against us again, this time in slightly higher positions of authority. I remember Dolores Umbridge from the old days – and so do you." She paused, watching Remus' face tighten as his own memories came back to him. "Sorry," Kate continued. "I know the Anti-Werewolf Legislation she put together has made your life virtually impossible." Kate paused. "She came to Washington, you know. Last year."
Remus' gaze turned incredulous. "America? Why?"
"It was … odd, to say the least. At first, we couldn't understand why Fudge would have sent her to the States; the British and US Ministries have always worked well together. We had heard nothing, seen nothing to indicate that Voldemort was gathering supporters in the US – and it wasn't like we weren't looking for signs. It quickly became apparent that dear old Dolores wasn't there at the behest of Fudge. She came on her own little mission." Kate glanced back up at her old friend.
"Promoting her own agenda, was she?" Remus asked, bitterness deepening the lines in his face and making his eyes slightly golden as he returned her gaze.
"Yes," Kate nodded. "She was hoping to enlist the support of the US Ministry in blocking any werewolves who might hope to immigrate to America from the UK."
"Effectively ensuring that they would be refused, deported and sent right back into the waiting arms of the MLE here," Remus finished, shaking his head. "Was she successful?"
Kate snorted softly into her mug. "Not by half," she responded with a grin. "The Yanks don't take to being pressured by "the Mother Country"; remember all that lovely tea floating in Boston Harbor, after all. That and their sincere belief in the underdog…" she paused as Remus choked a little, mid-swallow.
"Sorry, again," she said, smiling wryly. "Unfortunate choice of words. At any rate, they politely sent her packing. And now, she's going to be at Hogwarts."
"'Shaping young minds'", Remus added, his eyes narrowing. "As the DADA professor."
"Warping young minds, more like," Kate responded. "The Ministry's got its collective fingers everywhere as it is. Now, they'll be hooked into the kids. Suspicious, paranoid bastards; they won't be happy until they've turned everyone against Dumbledore."
"And now, Harry," Remus added. "They've pretty much got control of the Prophet, too. Just like last time. And they're going to continue their smear campaign, building dissent and mistrust everywhere until no one knows what – or who - to believe."
Kate felt her throat tighten. "Just like last time," she whispered.
Remus reached for her hand, "Kate, we know better this time. We won't let it get to us."
"You're damn right," she said, her voice rising in anger. "I'm not going to buy into rumors and innuendo about the loyalty of my friends and the people I love. Not this time. I made that mistake last time – and the price I paid for it was way too high!"
Remus tightened his hold on her hand. "You're not the only one who paid that price, Kate. We all fell into Peter's well-laid trap – and we all suffered for it. Poor, weak little Peter, always trailing after James and Sirius. How could he possibly be in league with Voldemort? He was afraid of his own shadow, after all. How could he plant seeds of doubt about Sirius' loyalty to any of us? Oh, yes, Peter knew just how to play us – and he did it beautifully. Kate, you know better than anyone how paranoid Sirius had become in those last days. He trusted no one. He didn't trust me, certainly – not after Peter was through with him. Merlin, he didn't even trust himself in the end. Sirius talked James and Lily into using Peter as their Secret Keeper because he didn't trust his ability to remain silent about their location if he was caught and tortured! Do you believe, for one moment, that Sirius would have done that if he'd had the slightest suspicion that Peter had gone over to the Dark? You know he would not – any sooner than he would have sold James and Lily to Voldemort himself."
Kate drew a shaky breath and removed her hand from beneath Remus' larger one. "Yes, I know," she said grimly. "Now. Thirteen years after the fact, I can sit here and tell you that what you're saying is true. When it counted, however, I'm afraid I wasn't quite as loyal. When it counted, I forgot everything I knew to be true about Sirius and lined up with everyone else who thought him guilty. He was convicted without trial by the Ministry and by those of us who were supposed to love him."
Remus sighed. "Kate, he holds no grudges against us. He holds grudges against two people: Peter and himself. The former he'll chase until he can't run after him anymore. The latter he can't get away from no matter how fast or how long he runs."
"He's managing to run fast enough to stay away from me, though, isn't he?' Kate asked softly, rising and crossing to the sink, mug in hand.
"One meeting, Kate. One meeting less than 24 hours after hearing that you were back in London," Remus pointed out.
Kate turned to face him, her dark eyes sad. "It's late. I'd better go."
"Kate, it's after 1 AM. You're upset. Stay here, there's plenty of room," Remus suggested.
Kate shook her head. "Remus, I can't stay here. It's not fair. He doesn't want to see me and this is his house. I'll be fine. I've got a room at the Three Broomsticks for tonight; tomorrow I'll start looking for something more permanent."
"Ok, I'll stop," Remus reached out and hugged her gently. "It's not just you, Kate. He's lost so much. He's not the free-spirited, self-confident man he used to be. The Dementors took away all his happy memories and those that are left play into his guilt and his sense of helplessness. He can't see Harry – hell, he can't leave this house. It's giving him more opportunity to think, to brood. I think that having more people around him will make it easier for him to adjust, to work through everything. Just give him some time, Kate."
Kate pulled back and looked up at Remus, her eyes suspiciously bright. "I hope you're right, my friend." She walked toward the door. "Lunch tomorrow?"
Remus followed her up the stairs. "Sure. What time should I meet you?"
Kate opened the door, allowing the fresh air to flood into the hall. "One o'clock ok? You can meet me at the Three Broomsticks and we'll eat there. Maybe you can help me with my house hunting." She managed a smile.
Remus squeezed her arm. "Sounds great. Of course, house hunting with a known werewolf may not be the best idea you've had in your life," he grinned down at her.
"Don't be ridiculous," Kate admonished as she walked outside. "Anyone who treats you badly will have me to deal with. Remember 5th year? Lily taught me the Bat Bogey Hex. Merlin, we had some fun with that!"
Remus laughed out loud. "Yes, you did! I don't think I'll ever get over the image of James locked in the broom cupboard with those great gray ears flopping around. The landlords of Hogsmeade beware!"
"Good night, Remus," Kate said, smiling. She stepped off the last stair and started down the sidewalk. Remus watched her as she crossed the street, turned on her heel and, with a soft "pop", Disapparated from view.
Closing the door and resetting the wards, Remus turned toward the stairs – more tired than he remembered being in awhile and looking forward to the warmth and comfort of his bed. As he reached his room, Remus glanced down the hall toward Sirius' tightly closed door. As usual, a glimmer of light shown through the slight opening at the bottom of the door. Remus sighed. Sirius found total darkness paralyzing – another souvenir of his time in Azkaban. As he entered his room and prepared for bed, Remus hoped that sleep would come easily to both he and Sirius tonight. They would both need to be rested when Remus broached the topic of Kate – and Sirius' need to face her again.