Fragments of Us
Disclaimer: This story is based on characters and situations created and owned by JK Rowling, various publishers including but not limited to Bloomsbury Books, Scholastic Books and Raincoast Books, and Warner Bros., Inc. No money is being made and no copyright or trademark infringement is intended.
Rating intended for later chapters.
Chapter 7 – Stalemate
Kate kept her distance from Sirius in the days following their disagreement. Work brought her home later than usual the following evening, having secured her portion of the items on Sirius' list. She found Remus alone in the kitchen, having just returned from guard duty. Sirius was nowhere to be found. Kate dropped the packages onto Sirius' chair and went over to the stove to inspect the leftovers in the pot Molly had left there. Helping herself to some of the stew, she joined Remus at the table for dinner.
Remus inclined his head toward Sirius' chair and the packages stacked there. "Finished your errands, did you?" he inquired, smiling.
Kate nodded. "Yes, mission accomplished. You?"
"Of course," he replied. "Far be it from me to risk the wrath of Sirius Black. Speaking of whom, do you happen to know why the Master of the house is passing the evening with Buckbeak? I would have thought he'd be waiting at the door, tapping his foot until his Christmas bounty was delivered."
Kate decided to ignore the bait. "No idea," she responded. "Perhaps he's decided that Bucky needs some trimming up for the holiday. How was guard duty?"
If Remus recognized the deft shift in topics he gave no indication of it. "Uneventful," he told her. "Care for tea if I put on the kettle?"
Kate shook her head. "I'm exhausted and I've an early morning meeting at the Ministry. I'm heading to bed. I'll take a rain check, though." Kate rose and picked up her bowl, but Remus stilled her hand.
"Leave it. I'll take care of it. Get some sleep and I'll see you tomorrow," he told her.
"Thanks," Kate dropped a kiss on the top of the werewolf's head and headed for the door. "You're sweet."
Kate hadn't been gone long when Sirius entered the kitchen and poured himself some tea. Pulling out his chair, he noticed the packages Kate had placed there and moved them to the floor before sitting down.
"Kate left them for you," Remus said, but received no response. "Sirius?" he tried again.
"I heard you, Mooney," Sirius growled.
Remus remained silent, knowing from experience that his friend would speak when he was ready to do so and not before. They sat sipping their tea for awhile then, true to form, Sirius spoke.
"Mooney, where did you go after James and Lily died?"
Accustomed as he'd become to Sirius' seemingly random questions and comments – particularly since his return from Azkaban – this one caught Remus off guard. "Oh, Padfoot, that was so long ago," he began, but when he looked up and caught Sirius' eye, he knew his friend would not settle for vague answers. What he didn't know was the reason for this line of conversation. "Alright. I went back to my family's home up north for awhile. Of course, I couldn't stay there forever with no money, so I went to Muggle London and lived there for a time. When I could, I tutored children to pay the rent," he finished.
Sirius looked at him. "Where did you go for full moons?"
Remus closed his eyes briefly, remembering those terrible times. "When I was staying at my parents' house, I stayed in the shed. When I moved to London, I transformed in the Shack. I did what I had to do and I'm still here, so it worked out fine in the end. Padfoot, what brought this on?"
Sirius shrugged and looked up. "Something Kate said last night, that's all." At Remus' raised eyebrow, Sirius sighed and continued, "She was talking about why she went to America and somewhere in the list she mentioned that you weren't around. I just wondered where you went."
The kitchen was quiet for a bit, then Remus broke the silence. "She had a hard time of it, Pads."
Sirius ran his hand through his hair and rose. "So I've heard, Mooney. So I've heard."
With that, he walked from the room, leaving Remus shaking his head. "What did I miss after I left the library last night?" he wondered.
The following morning, Sirius awoke to a furry tongue and a blistering headache. Eyes closed, he struggled to sit up, groaning as both his stomach and head objected to the movement. He waited for his stomach to settle a bit then slowly rose and made his way to the bathroom. Once there, Sirius opened the mirrored cabinet and removed a small bottle from the shelf. Uncorking it with his thumb, Sirius downed the violet-colored contents in one shot. Immediately, the physical effects of the previous night's Firewhiskey began to ease and Sirius sighed gratefully. As the fog in his brain began to lift, however, his gratitude began to dissipate, as well. Sirius relived himself, then headed for the shower. The hot water sluiced over his body, dipping into still visible hollows between ribs, curving into the slightly concave stomach and catching in the dark hair between his thighs. Sirius followed the trail of water and snorted derisively. His appearance and overall physical health had improved in the past months, with Molly's cooking and lack of exposure to the elements. Sirius, however, couldn't help but think about how he had looked before Azkaban had ravaged both body and mind. As it so often did these days, his thoughts turned to Kate, still beautiful, still vibrant, still whole. What in Merlin's name was she doing with him? Sirius shook himself, then deliberately rinsed the shampoo from his hair and quickly finished his shower. He didn't need to linger and give his mind the chance to wander into those areas. Drying off and wrapping the towel around his waist, Sirius wiped the condensation from the mirror with his hand. The face that looked back at him was gaunt and there were shadows beneath his eyes.
"Less drink and more sleep are advisable, young man," the mirror commented.
"Shut it, you," Sirius growled. "Keep it up and you'll find yourself in the attic."
His response was enough to silence the mirror, but not his overactive mind. His thoughts turned back to Kate and the current coolness between them. Sirius hated it, but was at a loss how to repair the damage. He really felt Harry had enough to contend with as it was without dealing with the knowledge of a Godmother about whom no one had told him. If Sirius was to be completely truthful with himself, he would admit that disappointing Harry was a huge part of that decision. He just didn't want to let him down – again. The last time he made the wrong decision regarding Harry's well-being, his parents had been murdered. Sirius felt the familiar pang of guilt and loss assail him as that thought crossed his mind. He dressed quickly and headed down to the kitchen as if the action could put distance between himself and his guilt.
Sirius expected to find the kitchen in darkness as the sun had not yet arisen. Instead, he stopped in his tracks as he saw Kate sitting at the table with, by the scent, a steaming cup of coffee. She was not yet aware of his presence and Sirius took the opportunity to watch her quietly for however long he could do so. Kate's chin was resting in her hand as she contemplated her cup. Her hair had been brushed to a soft sheen and, as she absently reached up to tuck a section behind one ear, Sirius had a clear view of Kate's profile: the long eyelashes that brushed down toward high cheekbones when her eyes were closed; the porcelain skin with a hint of rose at her cheek, the straight nose with its dusting of freckles over the bridge and her full lips, lush and moist. Sirius remembered how soft they felt against his mouth when they had kissed in the library only weeks ago. The memory made their current situation more unbearable than it already was. Not wishing to explore those particular thoughts further, Sirius stepped into the room.
"Good morning," he said quietly. "I'm sorry; I didn't mean to startle you." This said after Kate jumped at the sound of his voice.
Kate shook her head. "Occupational hazard." She quickly drank the remainder of her coffee, grimacing slightly as it burned its way down her throat. She didn't want to spend any more time alone with Sirius than she could help – not until she could sort out how to handle the bitterness and anger she still felt over the question of Harry. "I have to get going," she told him, crossing to the sink with her cup.
"Katie," Sirius reached out to touch her arm as she passed him. Kate didn't allow his hand to linger and continued moving. He sighed. "You're up early this morning," he offered.
"I have an early meeting at the Ministry and a full calendar after that. I really need to go," she walked back to the table, removing her wand from her robes and shrinking her leather briefcase until it was the size of a Muggle postage stamp. As she was pocketing the case, Sirius spoke again.
"Will you be back for dinner?" he asked, almost afraid for the answer.
Kate turned to face him after securing the clasp of her coat. "No, I've made dinner plans with a friend. I'll be back late."
Sirius spoke before he could stop himself. "Oh? Plans with whom? Anyone I know?"
Kate turned at the door. "You know, Sirius, I do have friends of my own." Seeing Remus enter the kitchen, she added, "Good morning, Remus. I'll see you both later." Then, she was gone. Silence descended over the kitchen, broken only by the sound of the front door closing. Miraculously, the portrait of Sirius' mother slept on.
"Leave it, Remus," Sirius snapped and left the room. He realized his friend had arrived in time to hear the latter part of his conversation with Kate. He really didn't feel like a lecture on his behavior at this hour of the morning.
&
Kate arrived at the Ministry earlier than necessary, giving her some time to work on open files before the staff meeting that had been called the previous day. Kate was planning to use some of the significant vacation time she had accumulated while assigned to Washington and had scheduled it to coincide with Harry's holidays at Grimmauld Place. If she couldn't let on to him that she was his Godmother, she'd spend as much time with him as she could in an attempt to re-establish some type of bond with the boy. Sirius was, as yet, unaware of her plans and she wasn't sure how he'd feel about them. Hell, she wasn't sure how she felt about them. Kate closed her eyes as she felt the anger arise again. One thing she did know was that she had to resolve this anger she felt toward Sirius or Christmas wasn't going to be very merry at all! Kate had just finished the largest pile of files when Bill Weasley's head popped into her doorway.
"Bill!" Kate exclaimed. "What on earth are you doing here at this hour of the day?"
Bill grinned and took her comment as an invitation to step into the room. "Bank business," he said vaguely. "And since I was going to be here anyway, I figured I'd confirm that we're still on for tonight."
Kate had met Bill a few years earlier when Gringott's had sent the curse breaker to Washington to deal with an issue involving King Tut's exhibit at the Smithsonian. After dealing with a minor, yet annoying curse that caused the sarcophagus to emit faint moans and squeals whenever children passed, Bill had been sitting in a café near the Ministry when Kate had walked in. She caught sight of his red hair and couldn't get over his resemblance to the Prewett brothers who had been in her year at Hogwarts. She went over to his table and introduced herself. His accent was like music to her ear after living so long away from home. Despite the slight age difference, they had become friends and the friendship allowed Kate to keep at least somewhat in touch with the goings on at home. When Bill heard from Molly that Kate had returned to London, he dropped by the Auror division to see if they might renew their friendship over dinner.
Kate smiled at the redhead. "You bet," she said. "It will be nice to catch up. Meet you at the Three Broomsticks around 6?"
Bill returned the smile. "Six it is, then."
Just as Bill departed, Kingsley stopped by to pick her up for their meeting and Kate's day was underway in earnest.