Okay, just a penultimate heads-up, this weekend (meaning Thursday-Sunday) I will not be able to update so one more chapter tomorrow (if I have time) and then see you next Monday.
Elsa walked along the hall, her bag bouncing against her thigh.
Where would Jack go, if he were upset?
She knew him well enough, she should know.
If I were Jack, I would...I would...
There. Of course Jack would go there.
She passed a few people in the halls, but no one stopped her. Elsa continued on her way, her eyes glued to the ground in front of her.
Man. She really messed up. She had just been so wrapped up in that one fear that she couldn't see that pushing Jack away wasn't the right thing to do. Why couldn't she see what was right? Why could she only see the one thing that didn't make sense?
It just wasn't fair.
She burst into the courtyard, and luckily, no one was there.
Elsa skimmed the yard for a second or two before finding the tree that would be the easiest to disappear into.
When she got to the base of the tree, she peered up at it. Since it was summer, the leaves were full out and she couldn't see if Jack really was there or not. But, she knew that he was. Call it best friend intuition.
"Jack?" She called.
There was no answer.
"I want to say that I'm sorry," she called out. She still got no response.
"Well if you're not coming down, then I'm coming up."
Elsa dumped her bag down against the tree and grabbed the nearest knot.
"I want you to know that I'm sorry. I was just scared. Of what, I don't even know. The thing is, I shouldn't have pushed you out. Ever. Not just now, but before, too. I guess I didn't realize that..." She broke off. She was about to say 'I guess I didn't realize that I love you,' but what if he didn't feel the same way? Sure, he loved her, but she didn't know if he loved her like that.
She gulped. "...I did need you. I still do."
She continued to climb at a painfully slow pace, using what little upper body strength she had to pull herself onto the next branch.
"And you can yell at me, scream at me, whatever. Just, please don't give me the silent treatment." She cringed when she said that. "Okay, not the best choice of words. I mean, please just say something. Look, I know that I don't deserve your forgiveness, but I still wanted to say that I'm sorry. For everything."
Still, she got nothing. She might as well have been talking to the tree.
"Okay, nothing? Come on, I know you're mad at me, and I totally deserve it, but please say some-" Elsa was cut off as she let out a scream.
The branch that she had grabbed had broken off in her hand, and she was sent plummeting backwards...
Or, would have been sent plummeting backwards. Had someone not caught her wrist and pulled her to safety.
"What the hell, Elsa?" Jack shouted at her. "Are you trying to get yourself killed?"
"That...wasn't the intention," she said, hugging herself and shaking slightly at what had almost happened.
"Wasn't the intention? Can't you think for once?"
She flinched at his words, but she had no place to comment or feel hurt by them and she knew it.
"You are going to get killed," he murmured, more to himself than anyone.
"I'm sorry," she said.
"Well, next time look before you-"
"That's not what I meant."
Jack didn't say anything.
"Jack?" She asked.
He looked away, a deep look of agonizing pain flashed across his face.
"Jack?"
Still nothing.
"Okay, I know that I don't deserve to not have the silent treatment. I should have realized that you were just trying to help. And...I understand if you just want me to leave you alone," she said. Just because she understood if he wanted her to leave him alone didn't mean that she wanted it.
But it was his decision, his right, and she had no say in it.
He didn't respond. He just sighed and started to climb down.
He...gave up on me.
Elsa stayed in the tree, just staring down.
He had decided. She had given him the choice, and he hadn't chosen her.
She couldn't blame him. After everything that she had said and done, it was a miracle he stayed with her until now. She knew that he would probably hate her. So no, she couldn't bring herself to blame him for his choice.
But that didn't mean it didn't hurt, all the same.
She brushed her bangs out of her face and descended down.
Well, she had tried.
It was just too late.
Excuse me?
Don't bother. I'm too late.
She shuffled onwards, walking back to her dorm.
How many times have you been 'too late' before?
I'm always too late.
So is Jack. Too late to realize what happened, too late to notice that you were hurt, too late to notice that you were here the whole time, and yet, he found a way, didn't he?
Yes, but-
No 'but's.' You've made thousands of walls that he's burst through for you. Now it's time to break through a few walls for him.
But he didn't want her. How could she break through his walls if she didn't even know if he wanted her to?
Then again, she had been so sure that she didn't want him to come through for her, but deep down, that's what she had wanted all along.
Maybe things weren't so complicated. The tables were turned. Now, she was the one who got left behind.
But if Jack could manage to catch up, so could she.
She would make things better, even if she had to do it alone. Maybe this would be the last thing she would ever have to face alone.
The thought made her happy.
Jack wasn't something she would let go. Not ever. Even if she convinced herself that she had.
By the time she got herself situated and down to Jack and Hiccup's dorm room, it was getting dark.
She took a deep, rattling breath and knocked on the door three times.
A few seconds later, Hiccup opened the door.
"H-hi," she smiled weakly.
"Elsa! Oh my God, are you okay?" Hiccup welcomed her in with open arms.
She nodded. "I'm fine. I'm...sorry. About everything. I shouldn't have been so cold."
"It's okay, but, can you at least tell me what happened?"
Elsa froze.
She couldn't. Not yet.
"I can't. Not now, okay?"
Hiccup nodded, understanding.
"Just promise me you won't ignore it?"
She sighed. She couldn't promise that.
"I'll try," was the best she could give him.
"Okay. Now, what's going on with you and Jack now?"
She cringed. "Well, it's a little complicated."
"Oh, I bet. Now, explain."
"Okay. Well, the...thing...that happened, it got me scared. I didn't know what to do, so I said something to him that I knew would hurt him. And now, I think I've pushed him away for good." She admitted.
Hiccup nodded. "Please tell me you're here for advice on how to win Jack back."
"What? Win Jack back? I don't- I mean, we're not...I, no, that's not what I-"
Luckily, Hiccup saved her from her embarrassing stammering. "Yeah, yeah, you don't have a crush on him, got it. Moving on now. Why did you think I could help?"
Well, he's got the 'you don't have a crush on him' part right.
She could feel the voice of reason smirking.
If it had a face to go along with the voice she would have slapped it.
"I just...I don't know, needed a reason to know that what I'm doing is right."
"Of course it's right, Elsa."
"I mean, I kinda told him that if he wanted me to leave him alone then I understood."
"And he...?"
"Well, he didn't exactly say anything, but I know that he did want me to. How do I go after him without breaking that promise?"
"You've known him longer than me," Hiccup pointed out. "But, the answer's simple. As with every good case, you've got to find the loopholes."
Elsa blinked. "Excuse me?"
Hiccup sighed, shaking his head as if to say, 'amateur.'
"You said you understood. You didn't necessarily say that you would."
Elsa finally understood.
"Hiccup, you're a genius!" She shouted, standing up.
"Thank you for being one of few who realize that," he smiled, but suddenly, his face fell.
"W-what is it?" What did she say?
"It's just..my dad," he choked out.
Elsa fell back down on the bed beside Hiccup, sorrow looming in her eyes.
"Hey, if anyone understands, it's me. Do you want to talk about it?"
He shook his head. He wasn't crying, but his eyes were watering heavily.
"Are you okay?"
Stupid question.
He sniffed, nodding.
Elsa sighed.
"No, you're not."
"What?"
"You're not okay. I went down this road alone. not because I had no one there for me, but because I chose to. I brought everything on myself, take a lesson from me, don't follow my footsteps, okay?"
Hiccup just stared at her.
"There are people here for you, who will support you through everything. Me included. What happened wasn't your fault. You couldn't have stopped what happened, no one could have. It wasn't your fault...just like it...wasn't...my fault..." Elsa faded away slowly, coming to even more sense.
She smiled.
"Elsa, are you smiling?"
"It wasn't my fault," she said, testing the words on her tongue.
"Um..."
"Sorry. Back to you."
"No, I'm fine. I'm strong. I'll get through it. And I'm glad you and everyone else are here for me. It means a lot," he smiled, too.
"It's the least I can do. You've helped me through so much," Elsa said, patting his arm.
"Now, go get Jack," he said.
Elsa just about stood, but then she heard Hiccup sniff.
She relaxed back down, pulling him in for a hug.
"Elsa? What are you doing?" But he didn't exactly protest.
"Jack can wait. So what if I'm too late? I've been too late for the past three years. I've made my decision, and being too late won't stop me from going after him, even if he doesn't want me to. Again, he can wait. Right now, you need me. Well, more specifically, you need someone to know that you're not alone in this. Might as well be me." She said into his shoulder.
"Thanks," he said dryly, but she caught the gratitude in it.
"Anytime," and she meant it.
"Can I ask you a question?"
"Um, sure?"
"Why will you keep going after Jack?"
"Aren't you the one trying to convince me to?"
"Yeah, but I want to know anyways."
She sighed, not replying for a moment. It seemed like she was thinking about it, but, really, she knew the answer. She just didn't want to admit it out loud quite yet.
"You can trust me, you know," he said, and that seemed to be the little nudge that she needed.
"I guess...well, going after someone no matter what, it's just something that you do for...the ones you...l-love," she stuttered on the last word.
Hiccup pulled back and stared at her.
Elsa just blushed, not daring to look him in the eye.
Eventually, he whistled.
"Whoa, I was so right about you not having a crush on Jack," he teased.
Her mouth opened in shock. How could he go from being sad and glum to happy and chipper the next?
She then fully grasped what he had said, and she shoved him in the arm, hard. Well, as hard as she ever did, which was probably equivalent to a shove from a butterfly.
"Shut up!" She said, trying not to blush harder than she already was and failing miserably.
Hiccup laughed.
From behind the door, hiding in the shadows where neither of them could see, Jack smiled as well.
She passed the test, he thought.
Somewhere deep inside of him, he responded, indeed she did.
He slipped away, heading back to the practice room. Hiccup probably wouldn't expect him for another thirty minutes or so, which gave him plenty of time to practice.
He was glad that Elsa hadn't left Hiccup. He had needed someone there, she was right about that.
Suddenly, he came screeching to a halt as he remembered the last part of their conversation.
Elsa, she had said that she...
The corners of his mouth twitched, and slowly, they curved upwards into a smile.
He continued on again, pushing the joyous feeling down and pulling his stoic expression back.
She had finally come to realize that she needed to stop feeling so alone and realize that she wasn't at all, and was ready to break down some walls of her own.
But she still had yet to do that.
For now, she was comforting Hiccup and that was perfectly fine.
If anyone could understand, she could.
Elsa didn't know how long the two of them stayed together just sitting in the dorm room, but it was very dark when she looked up.
She looked over to see that Hiccup had fallen asleep.
She smiled to herself, and slipped out.
Looking down at her phone, she saw that she still had a little time before light's out.
The summer schedule was very different from the school schedule, so, naturally, light's out was much later than usual.
She decided to stroll to her practice room.
She let herself into the hall of the practice rooms, walking to her own.
Before she reached hers, she heard someone else playing.
Guitar...and the voice was very familiar...
She felt butterflies erupt in her stomach as she realized that Jack was here and playing.
Elsa slowly crept up to the door, listening from the shadows.
She didn't recognize the song, but Jack still sang it beautifully.
These times will try hard to define me
And I'll try to hold my head up high
But I've seen despair here from the inside
And it's got a one track mind
She smiled while listening to him sing. When he was alone or with her, that was the only time he would really sing. When he flooded his song with emotion, he sounded very beautiful. She wished that he wouldn't be afraid to sing like that in front of everybody else, but, who was she to judge?
And I have this feeling in my gut now
And I don't know what it is I'll find
Does anybody ever feel like
You're always one step behind
Elsa agreed with the lyrics. Jack must too, otherwise he probably wouldn't be singing it. He changed pace slightly, pitching into the chorus.
Now I'm sitting alone here in my bed
I'm waiting for an answer don't know that I'll get
I cannot stand to look in the mirror, I'm failing
I'm telling you these times are hard
But they will
Why did this song fit her, too? It seemed like she couldn't escape the cruel hand of irony.
And I'm sure there's someone out there somewhere
Who has it much worse than I do
But I have a dream inside, a perfect life
I'd give anything just to work it out
It's like I'm only trying to dig my way out
Of all these things I can't
Elsa felt guilt twist her stomach in knots. Jack shouldn't be feeling this way. He should be singing songs about fun and living life to the fullest, after all, that's what he was best at. Key word there, Elsa; was. She had caused this.
And I'm sitting alone here in my bed
I'm waiting for an answer I don't know that I'll get
I cannot stand to look in the mirror, I'm failing
I'm telling you these times are hard
But they will pass
They will pass
They will pass
These times are hard
But they will
She felt a surge of happiness as she heard him singing this. It meant that he still had hope that things would work out. She knew they would. Elsa would make sure of it. Yes, these times were hard, definitely, but she would make sure that they passed. She owed Jack that much, at least.
These times will try hard to define me
But I will hold my head up high
She held her breath for a second, biting her lip. Why was she so all of a sudden nervous? Maybe because she knew that the song wouldn't last forever, and that when it was over, she'd have to go in and talk to him.
Sitting alone here in my bed
I'm waiting for an answer I don't know that I'll get
I cannot stand to look in the mirror, I'm failing
I'm telling you these times are hard
But they will pass
And I know there's a reason
I just keep hoping it won't be long 'til I see it
And maybe if we throw up our hands and believe it
I'm telling you these times are hard
But they will pass
They will pass
They will pass
Elsa squinted her eyes, wondering if any tears would come. None. But she promised that she would do her best to make sure that Jack never felt like this ever again. He was such a good person, he deserved so much more than what he got and what she gave him.
These times are hard
But they will pass
They will, Jack. I promise, she said in her mind.
She opened the door before he finished so that he wouldn't notice.
When the last note finally faded away, that was when she spoke.
"Pretty song."
Jack jumped, and if she hadn't been there for that reason, she would have laughed.
"T-thanks," he said quietly.
"Please talk to me," she pleaded.
"What do you want me to say, Elsa?"
"I don't know, honestly." What had she been thinking? She didn't know how to fix things! All she did was mess things up!
"Well, good night, I guess," he said.
But she couldn't let him leave like that.
"Jack wait!" She said, grabbing his wrist.
He paused, and Elsa dropped his arm.
"S-sorry. Can, can you just listen, please?"
He started to turn around, but Elsa stopped him.
"No! Don't look at me, just, uh, don't."
She couldn't think clearly if he was staring at her.
Well, here goes nothing, she thought.
"Okay. I'm going to make a lot of mistakes, okay? You can blame me, I won't care. In fact, you probably should blame me, but, anyways. I'm not perfect. I've been given so many second chances that I can never repay anyone for, and I don't even deserve those chances, but people still give them to me. They are the ones who show me that I'm not alone. They are the ones who show me the good in people, the good in myself. The good that I can never see.
"I pushed away everybody. I shut them out. But you knocked down everything I threw at you. Why? You didn't know me at that time, I was just a stranger. You shouldn't have cared, even if you did know who I was. Why you?"
She saw Jack's jaw muscle move, and she couldn't be sure if he was angry or what.
He turned around, and he was...smiling?
"Because that's what you do for the ones you love," he said quietly.
Her eyes widened, and then she blushed.
"Oh. You...you heard that?"
He nodded.
"I know you're going to make mistakes, Elsa. Everybody does. But I just...I just can't keep chasing after you. I need you to see that I'm not going to leave you alone, but I have tried, everything. I just don't know what to do anymore."
"Jack, I-"
"Please don't. I'm glad, really. I'm happy that you've finally found what it is you're searching for, or whatever you want. I just can't keep following you if you keep running away."
"I..." What did she say to that? An idea formed in her head. She sighed. "I understand."
"Good," he said. He gave one last smile before slowly turning back around to leave.
"But that doesn't mean I'm going to accept it."
He paused, hand on the door.
All or nothing, Elsa.
Are you going to conceal?
Or feel?
She walked up behind him, and he turned to face her.
She brought his face down, pulling hers up until they were just inches away, until they were staring right into each other's eyes.
"What are you doing?" He asked, but he asked it softly, like he already knew the answer.
"It worked for you, didn't it?" She replied.
He just stared further into her blue eyes.
"I'm not going to give up on you. I understand if you do, because God knows how much I've been running. But maybe it's time for me to do a different kind of running. I'm not letting you go, even if you let me go. I need you. I lied, okay? I need you, that's just a fact."
He started to smile. "Is it now?"
Feeling a little bolder, she glared at him slightly.
"Just shut up and kiss me," she told him.
And he did.
For the first time in forever, Elsa fixed something instead of breaking it. She was still far from complete, but she most certainly wasn't broken.
They pulled away, leaning against each other.
"I'm sorry I shut you out," Elsa breathed.
"I don't want you to leave," he replied back.
"I won't."
Jack started to chuckle, and then threw his head back in laughter.
Elsa stared at him, confused. Only Jack could turn a moment like that into a moment like...this.
"I'm sorry, it's just, I got so scared when I got kidnapped-"
Jack immediately stopped laughing and stared down at her with wide eyes filled with bewilderment and...anger?
Whoops.
"You got what?" He all but shouted.
Another long chapter! Not as long as the last long chapter but, 4,000 words and counting.
And the song I used is called These Times by SafetySuit. I feel like everybody could relate somehow to that song.
ATA: yeah, yeah, it said 'oh no' but that's who you normally are so don't hate. And lol that's totally fine, we all do it. Actually, I'm, pretty sure we all want to whack Elsa on the head with a big two-by-four, am I right everyone?
CupcakeMonkey567:P.N.4700; gee, way to be discreet about your "ways"
Grace; eh *shrugs*
P.N.4700; well if you're going to be like that, I might as well just delete the work I have so far of Chapter 2 of The Shifters...
C.M.567/Grace; NO NO NO ANYTHING BUT THAT!
P.N.4700; haha, yeah, that's what I thought. Now stop locking/chaining/trapping me in any way shape or form to/into things!
EmmaWinterFrost: thank you! And haha, me too. I think my profile pic is really cool because I had a really hard time finding one that I liked.
Rose: lol, uh, okk, I'll keep that in mind *not* haha, whaaaat? I said nothing! Because it is no one said she was the brightest light bulb of the bunch!
scarlet knight: btw, sorry if you get nightmares for the next week or so, I am not responsible for the things that Pitch does 24/7. And thanks, I feel like my song transitions are getting really crappy now but I try, that counts right?
shobbs10: lol A for effort! And, uh, how...was this...?
Livia Toric: thank you!
Popcornpollu: lol that's fine. And how did she even get ahold of your account- never mind. I don't even want to know.
Kat Biersack: aww, thank you! Lol, they are all so confusing. Even to me. Well, again, even if I did make a sequel
Grace; *whispers* sequel sequel sequel...
Cut that out! That's creepy! Anyways, where was I? Oh right, even if I did make a sequel, it would take a while to come out because I have more ideas for stories and another two that I should probably finish before I even THINK about another story. Plus, I want to go slow because I don't wan tto be one of those authors that have like, a gajillion Fanfics and seem obsessed. Anyways...
Snowman: haha, yep! But, they don't, because that's just the way the story goes. And I totally agree with you, it is a logical explanation, but still. Give the poor Nightmare King a little credit. *But he killed Sandy!* *Hush!* Well...um...interesting viewpoints you got there... Lol, jk, I agree with all of them. The SWAT team, lol I was laughing really hard when I read that part... And like I said, she's not really going crazy, she's just voicing her thoughts in her head. Yep...that's what I mean to say... Um, okay. And I HATE when that happens! But I'm already on edge because I'm reading this REALLY good Fanfic and I NEED the next chapter but it's going too slow sadness *tear*
Okay, again, *maybe* one more chapter and then I can't update until Monday! (Or Tuesday...if I have readers that far...which would be cool and I'll stop rambling on now.)