Fragments of Us

Disclaimer: This story is based on characters and situations created and owned by JK Rowling, various publishers including but not limited to Bloomsbury Books, Scholastic Books and Raincoast Books, and Warner Bros., Inc. No money is being made and no copyright or trademark infringement is intended.

Warnings: None for this chapter.

Chapter 40 – A Promise Reluctantly Broken

Kate walked into the quiet of the Ministry's Atrium and headed straight for the restroom located just steps away from the entrance. She told herself that it was the lack of food combined with the unsettling feelings of Apparition that were to blame for her stomach's sudden revolt. Collecting herself and rinsing her mouth, Kate made her way back out into the hallway and toward the bank of elevators at the opposite end. The normal hustle and bustle surrounding the elevators was absent as the arrival of the bulk of the Ministry's daytime employees was still three hours away.

"Good morning, Kate," Kingsley greeted her as she walked into their department. He peered closely at her as she entered her cubicle and placed her briefcase on her desktop. "Are you feeling alright?"

Kate sat down in her chair and shook her head. "I've picked up some kind of stomach bug and my system's a bit off. I'll be fine once it passes."

Kingsley nodded. "Get some crackers from the cafeteria. They'll help settle your stomach so we can get some work done."

Kate smiled wryly at him. "Thanks for your unbridled concern, Kings," she said, rising. "I'll be right back and we can start looking at surveillance schedules. That is why you're here early, as well, right?"

"Right," Kingsley affirmed, settling himself in one of the chairs opposite her desk. "Hurry back!"

Kate entered the nearly empty cafeteria and approached the older witch at the counter, who smiled as she drew level with her. "Good morning," Kate greeted her. "I'm looking for some plain crackers and a cup of tea to take away."

The woman reached beneath the counter and pressed several packages of Aunt Drina's Digestive Biscuits into Kate's hand. "Here, you are, dearie. No, no; no charge," she protested, holding up one hand as Kate tried to hand her some coin from her pocket. "I remember back when I was your age. Mornings were the toughest time for me for the first month or so, and then things settled down. These biscuits saved me. Just keep a package with you at all times – especially next to your bed for when you first wake up. Pop a couple into your mouth at the first feeling of nausea. You'll be fine. Oh, and tea is probably a bad idea. Let me get you some iced water to take with you."

Kate stood still, gaping at the retreating back of the Cafeteria witch. What on earth is she blathering on about? 'Mornings were the toughest time for me for the first ...' Kate closed her mouth with a 'pop' as the meaning of the words sunk in. No, oh, no – she's mistaken. She thinks I'm…but that's impossible. I can't be…. But, Kate realized with some degree of shock and – deep in her heart – certainty that she could, in fact, be pregnant. We certainly haven't been using anything to prevent it, she thought, wryly.

"…nice and cold for you. Small sips are best," Kate shook herself out of her thoughts as she realized the woman had returned to the counter with her water. Kate gave her several sickles and thanked her with a smile. As she turned to head back to her office, the woman called out, "Good luck to you, dearie." Kate waved, then thought to herself, I'm afraid I'm going to need a good deal of that if this is actually true. She walked back to her office, munching the biscuits and lost in thought.

"Kate?" Kingsley's voice broke into her reverie. "I've been thinking that you and I shouldn't be partnered together given our positions here."

Kate shook herself from her thoughts for the second time that morning and sat at her desk. Taking some parchment from her briefcase, she looked up at the senior Auror and smiled. "You and Remus are of like minds, it would seem," she said. "He's suggested that perhaps he and I be partnered and I've agreed that it makes sense."

Kingsley nodded. "It does, indeed." He scribbled a note on the parchment before him and said, "Shall we discuss the schedule? We can't really do much with additional pairings until we know who will be involved."

Kate agreed. "Let's draft the schedule then." And as they worked, Kate became more engrossed in the mission at hand and pushed more disquieting thoughts to the back of her mind for later.

When their colleagues began arriving for their normal shifts, Kate and Kingsley had drafted the schedule – and numbers of individuals needed for each shift. Satisfied that they had covered all known – and some possible – hurdles, they had everything in order and had already shifted to the tasks scheduled for the day.

After a morning full of meetings on the escaped Death Eaters, Kate was surprised to find that lunchtime had arrived – and that she was famished. Looking back on the morning, she realized that her stomach had given her no further trouble after she'd eaten a package of those crackers. Recalling the comments from the cafeteria witch, Kate withdrew one of the packets from her purse and reviewed it.

"Ready for lunch?" Kingsley's booming voice made Kate jump in alarm, but that alarm turned into irritation when he burst out laughing. "What have you got there?"

Kate glared at him, but showed him the package. "Crackers. The ones I got from the cafeteria. This morning. As you instructed. See?"

Kingsley looked. "So she gave you those things, yeah? Good! Muggles have a version called oyster crackers. Odd thing, they don't look or taste a thing like oysters. BUT, when one of the Aurors had a case in Muggle London awhile ago, he had a problem with his stomach and the Muggle doctor told him he had a 'mulcher' and told him to eat oyster crackers if he was hungry between meals. Said it would soak up the acid and stopped him from getting sick."

Kate laughed out loud. "Do you mean that he had an 'ulcer', Kingsley?" she asked.

A cheerful grin creased the man's features. "Yes, that was it! Did they work for you?"

Kate felt a wave of relief surge over her as she nodded and dropped the crackers back into her purse. Of course! She had always been prone to bouts of nerve-related stomach disorders. Her mother had called it "sour stomach". That must be the explanation. But even as this thought crossed her mind, Kate couldn't forget what the elderly witch had said to her earlier that morning.

Pushing the thought away again, Kate responded, "I believe they did. Let's head downstairs while I've got my appetite, shall we?"

Once they were seated, Kate and Kingsley barely had time to remove their plates from their trays before the sound of someone clearing their throat caught their attention. Malodros Spear, the young Auror who had felt the rough edge of Kate's tongue, was standing beside their table.

"Spear," Kingsley acknowledged his presence. "Were you looking for luncheon companions?"

Kate could barely hide her smile. Clearly, if the young and very ambitious Auror had found Kingsley by himself, that would have been exactly what he would be angling for. With Kate already seated at the table, however, that seemed very unlikely.

Spear shot a glance at Kate, but addressed Kingsley. "No, I've just finished actually. I was hoping to speak with you – privately."

Kate sipped her soup delicately and remained silent. If Kingsley wanted her to leave, he'd say something; of that she was certain.

"Sit down," Kingsley said, using his foot to move a spare chair away from the table. "Anything you'd say to me privately can be said in front of Kate. There are no divisions in our department, Spear. You should know that."

Reluctantly, and with another glance in Kate's direction, Spear sat in the chair Kingsley indicated. "I've heard that you both have been working additional hours and it's rumored to be connected to the Death Eater assignment."

Kate refused to look up at either of them. She wasn't certain where this was leading and felt it was better for Kingsley to address Spear's comment.

"You should know better than to listen to rumors, Spear. Kate and I are both senior in this department and, as such, have heavy caseloads. Was there something specific that you wanted to know?" Kingsley asked, seasoning his stew and sitting, spoon poised above the bowl, waiting for Spear's response.

"I want in," he said, words rushing out on an exhale of breath. "If there's something more going on than the Death Eater recapture, I want to be a part of it."

Kingsley ate in silence for a few moments then paused, laying down his spoon and looking at the young Auror intently. "As I said a few moments ago, you should know better than to listen to rumors. You are working on the only Death Eater recapture mission sponsored and supported by the MLE. You are part of the only team focused on that effort. Whatever else you might have heard did not come from me or from anyone else in any authority. Therefore, it is not credible information. Am I clear?"

Spear shifted in his seat. "Yes, you're very clear. Still," he paused and looked at Kate momentarily before returning his gaze to Kingsley. "you must admit that even the most farfetched rumor has some basis in fact."

Kingsley looked him over for a moment then responded, "Yes, you are right. And in this case, the fact of the matter is that there are far too many people in this building with so little to do that they fabricate rumor and innuendo in an effort to stir things up. I would try very hard to stay away from those people, Spear. An ambitious young Auror could find himself with a very, very long climb toward career advancement."

Spear stood, quivering with outrage. "Are you threatening me?"

Kingsley shrugged, picking up his spoon again. "I'm your superior, you're my direct report. I don't threaten; I mentor. Consider it career advice from your mentor. Keep your head down and do your job. Stop listening to idle gossip. If it's advancement you want, that's the way to get it. The only way."

Spear stayed where he was, glaring at Kingsley for a moment longer then strode purposefully for the exit.

Kate, long finished with lunch, waited until he had left the cafeteria before speaking. "So, where do you think this 'rumor' started?"

Kingsley shook his head. "I don't think there is a rumor, Kate. I think he's fishing based on something he's either heard or seen. I would suggest you exercise caution whilst in the building. Always know who's around you, who can overhear. I know, I know," he held up his hand as Kate began to protest. "You're an outstanding Auror and I know that you do that as a matter of habit. Given this conversation, however, I'd advise that you step it up. Lock up your parchment and other files when you leave. Use protection and repellant spells and charms in your cubicle."

Kate raised her eyebrows at him in surprise. "All this for a junior Auror with an ego the size of Hogsmeade?" she asked.

Kingsley held her gaze, no trace of a smile on his face. "Yes, when the junior Auror's family are all Slytherin."

Kate drew a sharp breath. "Slytherin! Kingsley, how did he get into this program?"

Kingsley lowered his voice. "He wasn't sorted into Slytherin; he was Gryffindor. Duplicate situation to Black's, isn't it? Except, it's completely different. I'm not sure how he managed it – the Sorting. But he's still closely connected to his family; he never severed ties with them. Perhaps at one time he was truly Gryffindor. Perhaps he still is. Perhaps it's just blind ambition and a thirst for recognition that's making him behave the way he is. It would fit the typical Slytherin behavior, wouldn't it? Let's keep our eyes open."

"Should we limit his access to information and participation on the team?" Kate asked as they walked toward the exit.

Kingsley shook his head. "Not right away. Let's give him some room to prove us wrong. If we watch him closely and see anything we don't like, we'll do it then. I'll meet with Dawlish and give him a bit of detail. Tell him to watch Spear closely."

Kate nodded. "Ok, Kingsley, we'll see what happens. But if Dawlish sees anything that makes him think twice about this kid, we pull the rug out right away, yes?"

"Absolutely."

XXXXXXXX

The rest of the day passed uneventfully. Kate and Kingsley dealt with standard responsibilities and did not revisit the Malfoy surveillance topic again, by unspoken agreement. Kate found herself keeping an eye on Spear throughout the afternoon, but the Auror remained in the department and, as far as she could see, was busy working on the caseload he shared with his more senior partner, an Italian Auror by the name of Gianni Valdaccio, who had transferred to England some ten years earlier. Gianni was well liked at the MLE and had an easygoing personality that Kingsley felt would help loosen up his rookie partner. They appeared to get on well and, as difficult as it was for Kate to believe, Kingsley assured her that Spear had definitely relaxed a bit under Gianni's mentorship.

Kate had a bit of a nauseous feeling mid-afternoon, but a packet of digestive biscuits soon put her right again and her mood was decidedly more upbeat when, at 4 pm, Tonks stuck her head into Kate's cube with a cheerful, "Wotcher, Kate!"

Kate smiled at the young woman. "How are you?"

Tonks smiled and flopped into one of Kate's guest chairs. "Not too bad – you? Snuffles said you haven't been feeling very well."

Kate rolled her eyes. "He did, did he? I wonder he hasn't begun Healer studies by now, he's so talented!"

Tonks giggled and Kate smiled at her before continuing. "It's nothing to worry about. I've always had a bit of an acid stomach. It bothers me when I'm anxious or if there's too much going on at one time. I've survived it my whole life; I'm sure I'll be just fine this go-round."

Tonks nodded. "I'm glad. I wouldn't want anything to happen to you, Kate," she said shyly.

Kate reached over and patted her arm. "You're very sweet, but I'm fine."

"Snuffles invited me to have dinner with you three tonight," Tonks said, her face flushing a bit as she spoke. "Ok with you?"

Kate nodded. "Of course! Oh – they don't expect me to cook, do they?"

Tonks laughed. "No, no. They said they were going to handle it."

Kate feigned alarm. "Well, then. I'd best get back to make sure they haven't leveled the place, hadn't I? What time are you coming over?"

"Oh, around 7. I want to go home and change, first. You know, take off the day, put on my face – that stuff," Tonks said.

Kate smiled to herself. Oh, Remus. You'd best wake up, my friend. This young woman is exactly what you need! She nodded. "Sounds like a very good plan to me, Tonks. I've been here since the wee small hours of the morning. I'm heading home now."

With a smile and a wave, Kate headed out of the department, not seeing how one pair of eyes followed her path to the door.

XXXXXXXX

Kate went down to the kitchen upon her arrival at Grimmauld Place. "Honey, I'm home," she called out merrily, looking around until Sirius' head poked out from the pantry door. Seeing her standing there in her Ministry robes, a brilliant smile lit up his face and he hurried toward her. "Katie-girl!" he exclaimed, hugging her tightly. "Let me look at you." He leaned down and peered intently at her face. "Color – good. Eyes – bright. Lips – kissable." Sirius gave her a cheeky grin and gave her a lingering kiss. Pulling back, he put his hand on her forehead and feigned a frown. "Oh, but your temperature may be a bit high," he announced. "But, that's easily explained as the effects of a certain wizard, wouldn't you agree?"

Kate couldn't resist. "Oh, Sirius, you know Kingsley and I are just friends."

Sirius let go of her and gave her a glare. "Not funny at all, Katie-girl. The day Kingsley bloody Shacklebolt can raise your temperature will be the day I'll just have to…"

"Careful, there," Katie interrupted, chuckling. "Don't promise anything too spectacular; you might just have to deliver!"

"You wound me, Kate," Sirius said, placing his hand over his heart. "Here I've been, slaving over a hot cauldron all afternoon – just to make you happy."

Kate leaned forward and wrapped her arms around his neck. "Please! Spare me the theatrics. Besides, I understand that you have a partner in crime for this dinner."

Sirius kissed the tip of her nose. "Indeed. But, as you can plainly see, my werewolf has abandoned his duties."

"And you so look like you're busy cooking dinner," a hoarse, but very amused voice chimed in from behind Kate and she turned to see Remus emerging from the wine cellar with two dusty bottles in his hands.

"Our wine steward is so irritable today," Sirius said, releasing her and moving over to the stove.

"Must be the management," Remus said, stooping to kiss Kate on her cheek. "How are you feeling?" he asked in a whisper.

Kate smiled and squeezed his arm. "Much better. I think it's just stress and, perhaps, something I've eaten that didn't agree with me. I've been eating some digestive biscuits and they seemed to do the trick."

Remus straightened, looking at Kate with an odd expression on his face.

"What is it, Remus?" she asked.

He looked at her a moment longer, then shook his head. "Nothing. Got distracted for a moment. I'm glad you're better."

Kate looked at him curiously, then announced that since they looked to have things well in hand, she as going to the library to do a little research before dinner. "Try not to fight, alright? I'd hate to have to drag out the hose."

Kate headed up the stairway to the sound of indignant noises from the wizards in the kitchen.

Once she'd reached the library, Kate headed over to the books the Blacks had kept on pureblood genealogy or, as Sirius called it, "the religion section" of the collection. Head tilted to one side, Kate read the titles on the spines from a respectful distance. She hadn't forgotten that some of the books carried powerful Dark protection spells – cast by their former owners – that could do significant damage to anyone without Black blood running through their veins. That was the last thing she needed with everything else that was going on these days!

"There you are," Kate said aloud as she found the book she was looking for looked around for the small stepladder so she could reach the volume. Before she could locate it, however, she heard "Accio" cast behind her and turned to find Remus standing in the middle of the room with the book firmly in his grasp.

"My hero," Kate said, smiling as she approached him. Her step faltered, however, when she saw the look on his face. It was not the lighthearted expression he had worn earlier in the kitchen. "What is it?" she asked. "Was there a message from Dumbledore? Is Harry…"

Remus held up his hand and Kate fell silent. "No, no. Nothing like that. Kate, sit down, I need to ask something of you." He gestured to the sofa and stepped aside to allow her to pass and settle herself on the deep cushion. Setting the book down on the table, he joined her.

"Kate, do you trust me?" Remus asked, looking at her intently.

Kate's face registered both dismay and surprise. "Remus! Of course I do. I trust you with my life. Why would you ask me such a thing?"

Remus took a deep breath. "If you trust me, why would you not confide in me? Particularly when the confidence was so significant?"

Kate shook her head. "Remus, I don't know what you're talking about, I'm sorry. If you can speak plainly, I promise I will tell you the truth. I would never hide anything from you."

It was Remus' turn to look confused, but after several moments, his face cleared and comprehension dawned. "Merlin – how could it be that - you wouldn't know?"

Kate felt her body begin to tremble and she closed her eyes. All she could picture in her mind was the white-haired witch from the cafeteria. "Remus, you're beginning to frighten me. Please, what are you on about?"

Remus reached forward and took her hand in his. "Katie, when I leaned down to kiss you downstairs, I knew immediately." He paused and touched his nose. "I can't help it. It's part of the lycanthropy." He took a deep breath. "Kate…"

Kate opened her eyes and looked at Remus, nodding. "I'm pregnant," she whispered, her eyes filling with tears. "I didn't want to admit it, didn't want to believe it was true."

Remus drew her to him and just let her cry for a few moments. Kate sat still, just taking deep breaths and trying to calm her mind. After awhile, she sat up. "Thank you," she said.

Remus looked at her curiously. "You're welcome, but I'm not sure what I've done," he admitted.

"Neither am I. Forced me to face the truth, maybe. I think I would have been happy living in denial a bit longer," Kate said, equally honestly.

"What now?" Remus asked.

Kate looked at him. "No idea. I can't be more than a month along, so I have some time before my condition becomes obvious."

"You need to see a Healer to make sure you're alright," Remus said.

Kate nodded. "I will. Remus, I can't walk away from this mission, you know that, right?"

Remus raised his eyebrows. "Kate, Sirius will never agree to your participation once he knows about this. You know that, right?"

Kate nodded. "And that is why I'm not going to tell him. No!" Kate raised her voice when Remus opened his mouth to interrupt her. "No! What if this is the mission that proves his innocence? What if we find Pettigrew as part of the surveillance? What if the entire war is turned based on the possible recapture of these Death Eaters? Of Malfoy? Sirius could be free because of this mission – if we're lucky. And even if it doesn't turn out that way, he will drive himself insane here, by himself, if I am anywhere other than right in front of him. Even if I walked way from an active role in the Malfoy case, he wouldn't be satisfied unless I worked here – right under his nose. Remus, Sirius will lose everything he's gained over the past weeks, fretting about how he will ever have a place in this child's life if he's forced to be on the run. No, I can't tell him – not now."

"But Kate, you both promised to be completely honest with each other. No more secrets," Remus reasoned.

Kate's eyes filled with tears again. "I know, Remus. Don't think I haven't already thought about that. But, I'm going to have to risk his wrath this time. There's too much at stake." She paused, closing her eyes to collect her thoughts. When she opened them, Remus inhaled sharply at the determination he saw in their brown depths. "You're going to have to trust me, Remus. I'm going to have to trust you and your confidence. You cannot tell Sirius about this. You must promise me that. In return, the moment this is over, I promise that I will tell him; and I will keep you out of it so he doesn't feel betrayed by us both. Agreed?"

Remus just looked at her, a feeling of unease settling over him. When he didn't answer right away, Kate reached out and grasped his hand in both of hers. "Remus! Please!" she whispered fiercely.

Remus looked down at her and sighed. "I said you could trust me, Kate and I meant it. I promise you that I will say nothing. This is your news to share."

Kate hugged him tightly. "Thank you, Remus."

Remus looked down at her. "Make no mistake, Kate, I don't agree with you, but I will support you. Now, go upstairs and get ready for dinner. We'll look at this research later."

Kate nodded and, together, they headed for the door.