That evening
COOPER: Diane, it's a little past 6PM. Major Briggs hasn't been seen in well over six hours. I am not one prone to wild speculations based on half truths and semi-facts, but I have to wonder if the Major's disappearance is related to what we've uncovered about Windom Earle's connection to the search for the Black Lodge. (Pause) Sheriff Truman has men in this and all adjoining counties on the lookout for the Major, combing the woods and the highways that cross through it. I just hope we find him before Earle does…
COOPER: Diane, 8:15. Late supper, room service—fettuccini alfredo with a delicate braised shrimp skewer, a slice of buttery garlic bread, blueberry cobbler for dessert. Aside from my unpleasant run-in with fish-filtered coffee at the Martells some time ago, I can say with all honesty that I have not had a bad culinary experience since setting foot in this town. It's remarkable, Diane. Really something. (Pause) Sheriff Truman insisted that I take a break and gave me the evening off. I have to admit that burning the candle at both ends as I have has done little except, I fear, cloud my judgement and impair my ability to think clearly, both of which are talents that I must put to better use if we are going to ever figure out the mystery of the Black Lodge and Windom Earle's connection to it. (Sigh) So, I am heading down to meet a girl about some dancing lessons…
Saturday, March 25
Very early morning
COOPER: Diane, something strange has happened tonight. It has taken me a full two hours to even begin to think about it with any kind of clarity, but I believe I have been given a message from beyond. From The Giant. What his meaning is is unclear. But I have an idea…(Pause) I feel as though meditation and deep reflection will help me to understand fully what this all means. I'll inform you the moment I hit on it.
COOPER: Diane, it is a little after 6:30 in the morning. I have been meditating instead of sleeping and have just finished my first session—focused on the Giant's appearance late last night. I fear I am no closer to understanding the truth but perhaps that is the point of all this: the realization that there are some truths that are unattainable, or that there may not be a truth after all. I'm sorry that things have been rather muddy and unclear in my field reports to you. I hope breakfast—which is on its way up, courtesy of the fine Great Northern in-room dining staff—will settle my stomach. (Pause) Also, I feel it is important to note that I am forgoing coffee today. Possibly tomorrow too. I will likely suffer withdrawal headaches, but I am prepared for it (Sound of a pill bottle shaking.) Painkillers. The maximum strength legally allowed without slipping over to narcotics, I believe. (Pause) The reasons for my decision are multiple. I enjoy coffee, but I have to be honest: I think my caffeine consumption is more to blame for my lack of quality sleep than anything else. This is something I feel I must remedy before it gets comically out of control. (Sheepish) Diane, I apologize in advance for any foulness of behaviour that makes its way onto these tapes. You know I mean nothing by it…
COOPER: (quietly; groggy) It has been an hour. I am suffering from a headache of extraordinary intensity. Have already taken twice the recommended single dosage, and I fear I may likely exceed the entire daily dosage before the morning is out. Have considered calling for Doctor Hayward but I'll wait until this next wave of pain passes. (Pause; weakly) I feel the need to lie down for a while. I'm unplugging the phone and drawing the drapes, and setting an alarm—a quiet alarm—for one hour from now…(Sharp intake of breath) Good lord...
COOPER: (Even more weakly) I believe I may be taking my very first absentee day. Please extend my deepest apologies to Gordon…
COOPER: Would it be possible, Diane, to send me a copy of the Watergate tapes? And some ginger ale. No. Yoo Hoo. I haven't had Yoo Hoo since I was a kid. (Pause) I think I'm going to be sick...
COOPER: (singing) "Puff the Magic Dragon lived by the sea..."
COOPER: (whispers) I can hear voices. Diane, there are voices in the walls! And the bed posts and the floor boards and the drawer pulls...
COOPER: …This is ridiculous.
COOPER: Diane, it is 10:45 ante meridiem and I can't feel my face. It is a strange sensation, not entirely unlike being frozen at the dentist, but far more…pleasant. My head is filled with helium and my neck is the balloon string. If I sit still long enough I believe I will circumnavigate the globe. Or the Milky Way Galaxy. (Dreamily) There will come a day, Diane, when the entirety of the world's information will be able to fit on a microprocessor small enough to stand on the head of a pin. Does that not boggle the mind? (Pause) I think I like music videos now. The green ones, anyway…
COOPER: (Soberly) I caved. Diane, I completely and utterly caved. Three hours without coffee and the rather…intense experience of nearly overdosing on over-the-counter painkillers has shown me that addictions are best weaned and not quit cold turkey. I ordered a pot of coffee and, I have to say, I feel much more like myself. This is not surprising in the least considering my previous regular intake. (Pause) I'm not entirely sure if it's safe for me to drive, so I'm playing it safe and having Lucy bring some paperwork to me instead. I've decided that the best move for me will be to quietly consume the coffee and continue my meditative techniques in the hope that it will help…(Softly) Diane, please save this tape, or at least the last handful of entries, to play for me the next time I decide to try to relieve myself of my dependency on caffeine.
COOPER: I only drank half the pot, and sent the rest back to the kitchen. Maybe tomorrow, I'll try decaf. (Pause) Baby steps, Diane.
COOPER: Diane, it's 1:15 PM. I've just concluded my second meditation of the day in lieu of sleep. I am completely refreshed and struck again by the realization that we all live at a fraction of our potential. We've been working round the clock on the cave hieroglyph. I know the answer is in that crude etching and I am now convinced that Windom Earle is searching for the same thing we are, and for diametrically opposite reasons. If I'm correct in my assumptions about the power of that unholy place…God help us if he gets there first. (Pause) I want to make specific mention of Annie Blackburne. Diane, she is a completely original human being. Her responses are as pure as a child's. To be honest, I haven't felt this way about anyone since Caroline. It's taken meeting someone like Annie to realize how gray my life has been since Caroline's death, how cold and solitary—(Faint knock at the door) Although occasionally there is something to be said for solitude.