CHAPTER FOUR

I was not in a hurry to get down to the dining hall. Surprising, you'd think, as my real parents, the King and Queen of Merlana, were awaiting to recieve me with open arms --- as though I were a character in an improbable movie --- but I didn't want to see them. I felt nothing but bewilderment, and wanted more than anything to climb into the luxurious four-poster bed I found in my room and sleep. Maybe if I could, I'd wake up to find myself back in the comforting familiarity of home. I would have tried it, but time was apparently pressing, and I didn't have the strength to resist its demands. I almost despised myself because of this limpness, then realized that I didn't have energy for that, either.

As I stared out the window, drying my hair, looking out over the water, the entire scenario hit me with a pounding sense of numbness. Not numbness, exactly, but such total and profound confusion as to render the emotions similar. This could not be happening, but when I stubbed my toe on the chest by the window it really hurt, I could see that the wallpaper was peeling in a corner of the bathroom, and beneath the scent of roses that permeated my bedroom I could detect a hint of something like cats. It wasn't a bad smell, really, but I hated it for convincing me that I was, in fact, awake and alive. My dreams didn't come with smells, and though I tried to entertain the idea that I was actually in a coma or something from having swallowed too much seawater, I'd never heard of someone in a coma coming up with such a strange and detailed story. Perhaps I was dead... The notion didn't last long, although I almost thought I could deal with it better.

So here I stood, a princess, expected to start some vague training and then inherit a throne of an island no one had ever heard of. Like anyone else, I'd daydreamed about being a Her Highness clothed in pink silk, but this reality was making me feel ill, and frozen, and shivery, all at once.

"Here," Mom said, coming up behind me. She held up a dress for my inspection, a sumptuous affiar in layers of deep teal chiffon and embroidered with silver. I looked at it blankly, and she sighed. "Honey, I'm sorry about all of this."

I didn't say anything. She gave me the gown. "There's a screen over there in the corner. Go change, and then I'll fix your hair."

I nodded. "Mom?"

There was a brief silence, and then she said hesitantly, "Marina, I don't think... I think you need to call me Lisette from now on." Hurriedly, she went on, "I still love you, and I always will. But... But your real mother is here now."

I bit my lip and nodded, not meeting her gaze. She nudged me gently. "Go on."

Once behind the screen, I blinked rapidly to fight back the tears. They came anyway: three of them, burning trails down my cheeks. I couldn't cry, not now. When you were stressed, you were supposed to focus on breathing, right? In through the nose, out through the mouth, slowly. There.

When I was sure I appeared calm, I stepped out from behind the screen. Mom --- Lisette --- nodded, a faint smile on her face.

"You look lovely," she said. With no further words, she sat me down at a table and began to comb through my hair. I closed my eyes and focused on the sensation. It was soothing. I hadn't really had anyone do my hair since I was very young, and with the ticklish tuggings and occasional prick of pain that roamed my scalp came other sensations, of being young and safe and on top of the world. She pulled it back and clipped it with --- what else? --- a seashell, polished to a fine sheen and edged in silver.

"There," she said. "Come along."

"I don't want to," I said. My voice came out in a pathetic little whisper, and I cleared it in frustration. "Can't this wait until tomorrow?"

"No," she said. "They've been waiting many years to see you, and if I know Pearl, she's already down there sitting on the edge of her seat and biting her nails." She crouched down until she was at my eye level. I was again struck with how different she seemed. Despite the new softness, she was stronger, too, strong in a real way instead of the brisk professionalism I had always known. "Marina, I know this seems awful. I've wished this day would never come many times because I know you and I knew you wouldn't like it. But you'll grow to see how wonderful this place really is, I promise you. I've missed it more than words can say. I've missed your parents, too. They're good people."

"I'm sure they are," I said. She raised her eyebrows.

"Ah, the teenage sullenness I know and love."

This, at least, was familiar. A small smile crept onto my face.

We walked down to the dining hall mostly in silence. Finally, we stopped at a door brushed with gold leaf. "Here we are," she said.

"You're coming too, right?"

"Of course."

I was flooded with relief, which quickly dissipated into tenseness as she opened the door, nudging me through and following behind. I stood still, as Mom --- Lisette, her name was Lisette now --- stepped forward. There was a short shriek, and a tall, elegant woman with long black hair stood and rushed over to us in a whirl of blue silk.

"Lisette!" she exclaimed, and within seconds the two were in a tight embrace. They pulled away as one and started jabbering. It was liking watching two girls meet at school after summer vacation. I watched with morbid fascination.

"Nereida said you'd arrived, but I couldn't really believe it because it's been so ---"

"--- I know, and as soon as I heard ---"

"--- You're actually here ---"

"--- and it's been forever, it seems like ---"

Amidst more talking, they hugged again. Lisette nudged the woman and gestured to me, and they fell immediately silent. It might have been comical, but I was in no mood for laughter.

Her eyes were piercing, a blend of blue and green and quite dark. I was surprised at how much of myself I saw in her face. Same hair, definitely, same mouth, same bones. Our noses were different, but I soon saw where I had got mine as a man came to stand next to her. I had his eyes, too, dark and thickly lashed. They were both beautiful, like all the other people I had seen here, and they gazed at me. It was getting to be quite uncomfortable when the woman held out a hand. I took it hesitantly. She didn't shake it, just held mine in hers.

"Welcome home," she said, in a low voice.

The man bowed. This was an unusual way to be greeted by an long-lost father, I thought, but I supposed it could have been worse. He could have tried to hug me.

There was an awkward silence, which Lisette broke by saying cheerily, "Well, I for one am glad that's over with."

Pearl laughed, and let my hand fall.

"I'm sorry," she said. Her voice was melodious. "This must have been a very trying day for you."

I nodded. When no one seemed to be telling me what was and wasn't appropriate to say, I ventured, "Yeah, just a bit."

She looked sympathetic. "We'll try to make it up to you."

"Let's start with dinner," the man --- Ryne --- said. His voice, too, was musical, although much less than Pearl's. "Mabelle claims she's been slaving all day over this meal, so I suggest we all appreciate it." He paused, then added with emphasis, "Loudly."

"She's still here?" said Lisette, looking delighted. "Some things never change, thank goodness."

"She keeps on insisting that she'll quit soon," he said. There was something nice about his mouth --- he didn't seem particularly jovial, but he seemed to have a smile hidden inside somewhere, just out of reach. I kind of liked it.

"Again, some things never change." Lisette turned to me. "Mabelle's the head cook," she said. "Commander of a vast legion of scullery maids, and to be quite honest I think she ranks higher than most of the royal advisors as far as being in charge of things."

I got my first look at the room as we went to the table. I was rather shocked I hadn't noticed it before, for the walls were made of glass, clear and stained, set in pillars of stone. There were no real pictures displayed, just geometric designs in green near the floor and blues and oranges at the ceiling. In the middle, there was merely a wide band of smooth, clear glass. The room was seperate from the rest of the castle, and outside sat a flower garden vibrant with color, beginning to be tinged a soft yellow by the sinking sun.

"Do you like this?" asked Ryne, smiling slightly. I nodded.

"It's beautiful."

"My father designed it. Originally it was intended to be out on the edge of a peninsula of the island, but as that's a bit far from the castle the plan was abandoned for the flower garden."

"It's a good alternative."

He smiled at me, and sat down at the table. Pearl was already sitting, and I was relieved to see that, royalty or not, we were not to be waited upon by servants standing behind our chairs as though they had nothing better to do. I settled where Lisette directed me, beside Pearl and across from herself. She gave me a reassuring smile.

A moment later, as I was trying to free my arms from my full sleeves --- long and slitted, but clasped vexingly around the wrist --- a woman came out of a door, not too far from the one we had entered by. She was rather plump, with the proverbial rosy face and frizzing red hair which she had attempted to tame into a bun. She carried a large wooden bowl, intricately carved, and behind her came, as Lisette had said, a legion of scullery maids. Their uniforms were a chocolate brown color, quite elegant, really, and each girl bore a bowl or tray of something. There was, I noticed, neither meat nor fish among the dishes. This was fine by me; I liked neither.

"Majesties," she said with a crisp nod. She set her bowl on the table, which seemed to be a signal for the maids to do the same. They were all casting glances at me, some more tactfully than others, and I was relieved when Mabelle waved her hand and they disappeared back through the door.

Mabelle curtsied to me. "Highness." She blinked rapidly. "Oh, Highness, you'll all grown up, and so pretty. Well, I expected that, of course, you were a lovely baby, but... Oh, you look just like your mother. Well, the palace has been a much darker place without you, if I may say so, and I for on am glad you're back." She said this last bit almost defiantly.

"Thank you," I said. "I'm glad to be here." I was starting to catch on to the graciousness I was to be expected to assume, and saw I had not thought wrongly when Lisette nodded her approval.

"Well, I'll leave you to enjoy your meal, then," she said. "It was planned especially with you in mind. Lady Lisette sent word what your favorite dishes were, and I'm afraid I couldn't figure pizza out, nor root beer --- though I think you're a mite young to be drinking such things! --- but everything else should be to your tastes." She curtsied again. I couldn't repress a smile.

"Thanks. I appreciate it."

She sniffed loudly, and left the room hastily, muttering to herself. I thought I heard Ryne give a snort of laughter, but when I looked, his face was composed as ever.

"And that," said Lisette, "is Mabelle. She runs this place, never doubt it."

"Nor would any of us want things differently," Ryne said. Pearl nodded.

"But come, Marina," she said, almost shyly. "Tell us about yourself. I'm afraid we don't know you at all, other than what Lisette passed on."

"What do you want to know?" I asked, glancing up at her and then returning to my plate, which held a scattering of all sorts of various dishes which I assumed were supposed to resemble such things as stir fry and pasta with chunky sauce, and all of which missed the mark entirely, though not in a bad way.

"Anything," she said. "Everything. What do you like to do?"

I shrugged. "I read a lot, listen to music, spend time online. Nothing spectacular."

She shot Lisette a puzzled look. "Online?"

"Computers," Lisette said, and Pearl nodded, a look of mild comprehension on her face.

"Oh, yes, those. I see. Yes, I recall you telling me about them. Interesting things."

I nodded. "Yeah. That's pretty much it. I don't have any hobbies," I added apologetically. It had always been a problem of mine --- adults always tended to ask what your hobbies were, as though by knowing that one question they could be your best friend, but I had never been concretely drawn to anything for more than a week at a time. It left quite a few gaps in conversation.

"That's all right," Pearl said with a smile. It seemed genuine. "That'll give you more time for exploring Merlana."

After taking a sip of whatever was in my goblet --- some kind of juice, strong and heavy but too fresh to be wine --- I asked, "Where are we, anyway? I've never heard of this place. Well... obviously."

"We're in the Atlantic Ocean, quite close to Morocco, although Merlana has island provinces as far as the Mediterranean Sea, near Italy and Greece. They're all hidden, of course."

"How?"

"The ocean," she said with a smile I could only define as mysterious, trite as that sounded. "She's on our side."

I raised an eyebrow, but she just smiled. "You'll learn all about it soon."

"Probably from a sea shephard," Lisette added. "I'm guessing that you'll take lessons from one at court."

"What's a sea shephard?"

"I don't know what they do, exactly, to be honest," she said. "They're just kind of... there. The listen to the sea and bring information. Ryne?"

"They communicate with the ocean," he said. "Speak her language. It's a complex process, and though I've learned some, it takes a certain amount of natural aptitude, which I'm afraid I lack. Pearl, on the other hand, is quite fluent."

"Well, mermaids are," she said wryly. He conceded this with a nod.

"True enough. Anyway, you'll be able to study that with one of our shephards here, along with all your other lessons."

I thought of asking what, exactly, I would be expected to study, but held my tongue. I didn't have energy to ask more questions --- and no doubt I would find it all out in time.

The rest of the meal was spent in the same kind of pleasant small talk, carried through the awkward gaps by Lisette. I managed as best I could, although I feared I made a very poor dinner companion, as I didn't know them well enough to speak freely. In addition, I didn't really know myself. Everything was slightly hazy and passed without my being as aware of it as I normally was, although time itself seemed very fickle and prone to slow down and speed up in an irritating way. It was rather like the sensation of being too tired, which I felt I was. Perhaps I was just in shock. Either way, I made it through dinner, trying to form opinions on my "parents," but by the time I got back up to my bedroom the entire meal had faded as though it had been only a dream. They had bid me goodnight very nicely, again without too much unwarranted physical contact, for which I was grateful. Lisette --- I still had to bite the name "Mom" from the tip of my tongue every time I addressed her in words or in my thoughts --- accompanied me up, and then, sensing quite rightly that I would rather be alone, left. I fell straight into bed and slept, heavily and with no dreams.

A/N: Scoutcraft Piratess: I'm glad you noticed the name thing! It popped out of my fingers and I liked it quite a lot, so it stayed. And no... I didn't mean to say that bit about the fiancee and mermaid --- I about died laughing when I realized what it said. Talk about putting a new twist on the Little Mermaid story, lol. Thanks for pointing it out --- it's fixed now!