After all of the chaos at the media show interview, the crew finally made their way home after a good night's rest.
Dormammu joined the cast..tensions were flaring..and Deadpool was giggling the whole time.
He played the video of Magneto getting his ass kicked over and over in the back of the limo. Magneto constantly heard his own scream and was growing agitated. He clenched his fists and gritted his teeth, trying to hold back the murderous intent within his soul.
Ryu stared out the window glancing at the numerous signs and billboards that went by. Dante sat across from X-23 and occasionally glanced at her when she wasn't watching. Their gazes locked a couple of times, and each time they looked away at something else when they caught each other.
MODOK was eating a banana and chatting with Dr. Doom. Super-Skrull was nodding off beside Doom, slowly falling asleep again.
Hulk: HULK SO CRAMPED IN THIS CAR. HULK NEED ROOM! HULK IS HOT.
Chris: Calm down, Hulk. We'll be home in about 30 minutes.
Ken glanced at his rearview mirror and smiled at Chris. Ken Masters had no intent of going straight to the House. He had...something else planned.
When Felicia noticed he hadn't taken a right on a certain road, she knew something was up.
Felicia: Mr. Masters! Where are we going!
Ken: We have some hitch-hikers we gotta pick up! Won't take but a second!
Zero: Hitch-hikers? Like who?
Chun: Probably some Playboy bunnies.
Ken: Hey hey hey! Don't judge me. Besides, you're wrong Chun-Li.
Iron Man: Then who?
Ken: You'll see soon enough.
Viewtiful Joe: Hey...where are we? Nothing is down this road except for Mayor Mike Haggar's Boot Camp!
As those words settled themselves in Dante's mind fireworks went off in his brain.
Dante: BOOT CAMP!
Spider-Man: You HAVE to be shitting me...Ken! TURN AROUND!
Ken: No can do. Orders from Mr. Ono. Sorry guys!
Morrigan: This will not be pretty, Ken.
Ken stopped the limo right outside of the camp and waved to his passangers.
Ken: I'm sorry guys...but..well..see ya!
Ken opened the glove compartment and pressed a button inside. The limo's top slowly retracted, and everyone's seat ejected into the sky.
Deadpool: Oh god, I feel just like an evil villain ejecting from his certain doom!
Dr. Doom: What about Doom?
Deadpool: Not you!
Hulk: HULK SO HIGH IN SKY. HULK NERVOUS!
Wolverine: YOU'RE NERVOUS! I'M THE ONE THAT'S NERVOUS! GRAAAHHHHHHH
Felicia: I can't fly!
Magneto: I can! Peace out! Magneto leapt from his seat and levitated for three seconds. He noticed that something was wrong, and he quickly plummeted to the grounds below. The power of flight was limited inside of this camp, and it showed.
Everyone in their seats ultimately crashed inside of the camp. It was a giant, wide area..with six wooden buildings off in the distance. There was a HUGE forest located to the far left of the buildings, past a giant desert-like area, and some large hills beyond that.
The sandy area was dry and neglecting. The wind blew sand everywhere like a small sandstorm. The air was somewhat heavy, and the gang knew they were in some deep booboo.
Dante looked around and sighed. Chris looked at Ryu and the two shook their heads.
Chris: Well..we're fucked.
Wesker: Ha, giving up so quickly are we, Chris?
Chris: No! It's just that well..we're fucked.
Wesker: Fair enough.
Skrull: What is this place? The sand feels like something off of Torrax IV.
Morrigan: Torrax IV?
Skrull: Yeah! It's the mirror planet of Mars in my homeworld.
Morrigan: Ohhhh, gotcha.
Trish: This is soooo not good for my hair...
Felicia: Yeah, I'm going to have a hard time getting this sand out.
X-23: Where are we supposed to go?
Wolverine: I guess to those log cabins up there? Maybe?
Deadpool: Log cabins...this is like something off of a horror movie. We're stranded in the desert..and the only means of habitat we have are...log cabins...
Viewtiful Joe: Oh goodness..shut up, Deadpool!
Dante: It's okay Joe. Be cool. We'll make it out of this. Let's go.
The gang trecked across the sandy land..up sand dunes..down sandhills. It was a tedious walk, but eventually they made it to the cabins.
Magneto: We can't fly here!
Iron Man: Duh. Kinda figured that ever since we got here.
Captain America: These are the cabins huh? Six of them.
Zero: I wonder whose are they?
She-Hulk: Probably Mike Haggar's..and his students'.
Spencer: Students?
She-Hulk: Yeah..the poor souls who were sent here to train with him. Never made it out alive.
Ryu: Legend says that you can still see the bones..buried and disguised by the sand.
Deadpool: I'm about to soil my costume.
Morrigan: Please do it somewhere else..
Wolverine: Hey, there are labels on the doors..
Storm: "Cabin 1...Cabin 2..Cabin 3..Cabin 4..Mess Hall/Meeting Room" and the "Warden's Cabin".
Zero: Guessing Haggar is the Warden..
?: That is correct.
Everyone whirled around and glanced at the giant man that stood before them. A shirtless, brown haired man with a nice moustache. He wore green pants and a leather strap around his torso. His hands were at his sides like some sort of man of justice. His name was Mike Haggar. And he was the Warden.
Mike: You all have been brought here, to train with me. Orders from Ono. I'm going to work your asses off for the next few days. Don't hate me if you die here.
Spencer: Training? For what?
Mike: For anything. Most importantly, to balance you for the next few characters that will be joining this game. Maybe for possible patches in the future. The world will never know.
Trish: What do we have to do?
Mike: Your objectives will come in due time. But for right now, I'm going to issue teams.
X-23: Teams?
Mike: Correct. There are four giant buildings here. I will put you into equal teams. Every team is assigned a cabin. See where I'm going with this?
Doom: Yes.
Mike: I will discuss more things with you at 5PM. In the Mess Hall. Your things will be in your cabin. Clothes, persoanl items and such.
Spider-Man: ...
Mike: So. Teams. Here we go.
Iron Man mumbled under his breath, knowing he would have a cabin with Doofpool and Dorky Joe. He began to swear under his breath and he crossed his fingers.
Mike held up one finger, signaling it was the list for Cabin 1.
Mike: Hulk, Amaterasu, Arthur, Joe, Zero, Jill, Dante, Hsien-Ko, and Wolverine.
He held up two fingers for Cabin 2.
Mike: Phoenix, Felicia, Spencer, Tron, Magneto, Iron Man, Modok, Taskmaster, and Storm.
He held up three fingers for Cabin 3.
Mike: Skrull, Doom, Captain America, Akuma, Wesker, Deadpool, Thor, Chun-Li, and Ryu!
He held up four fingers.
Mike: Spider-Man, Trish, Sentinel, Chris, Viper, She-Hulk, Morrigan, Dormammu, and X-23!
The gang all looked at each other and shook their heads.
Dante: NO!
Haggar: HAHAHAHAHAHA too bad. You're stuck in these groups until I change my mind. Go unpack and chill until I call you into the mess hall. Dismissed.
Haggar petted his moustache and eyed The Hulk. He smirked, turned around, and walked toward his own private cabin.
Chris: Hey, woah woah woah! Who is Phoenix?
Iron Man: Taskmaster?
Wolverine: SENTINEL IS HERE!
Zero: OH GOD, TRON IS HERE!
Thor: Who?
Trish: Hsien-Ko?
Felicia: I know her!
Morrigan: As do I. This is going to be...interesting...
Storm: Very.
Dante: So...uhh...guess we gotta go inside and unpack huh? Then what?
Ryu: We could go walking.
Dormammu: Walking? Pah. We should go kill that monkey with the moustache and rule this camp ourselves!
Wesker: I like the way you think, Dormammu. We could use this campground for a biological operations site. Where we inject plants with UROBOROS. And watch...as they die..slowly!
Magneto: I swear you have a plant fetish!
Modok: Is that even possible?
Chris: If you can have a fetish for raping little kids, you can have a fetish for anything.
Thor: RAPING LITTLE CHILDREN? RAPE! Wait..what does thou mean?
Morrigan: Rape is where you force someone to have sex with you against their will.
Dante: You'd know all about that...
Morrigan: What did you say?
Dante: I was talking to Spider-Man...
Spider-Man: ...No you weren't...
Dante: Uhh...OKAY GUYS! Let's go unpack!
Dante whirled around and sprinted into his cabin, where his bags await him. The rest of the gang followed, into their respective cabins. After hours of unpacking, settling in, and chatting..the housemates emerged from their cabins and stood outside. Absolutely bored.
The gang met Taskmaster, Hsien-Ko, Tron Bonne, and Phoenix but the other three were missing. Jill, Sentinel, and Akuma.
The gang all stood outside and watched as the sand swirled past them. Chris wiped his eyes and took a sip from his water bottle. Iron Man opened a bag of Doritos and began to munch immediately as everyone turned to stare him down.
Wolverine: Gonna share those, bub?
Iron Man: Wasn't planning on it. Why?
He munched in Wolverine's face as he spoke. Crumbs flying from his mouth and assaulting Wolverine's steaming face. Ryu looked toward the forest and pointed at it.
Ryu: Let's go check out the forest!
Chun: But what about Haggar?
Tron: Screw him. He hasn't come out yet. We'll make it back in time!
X-23: I don't like this...
Spider-Man: Me either. But there's nothing else to do.
Deadpool: Let's not stay in there too long...you know what happens to the comic relief guys in horror movies...
Spencer: What is with you and making analogies to horror movies?
Dante: It's Deadpool.
Spencer: True...
Ryu: LET'S GO!
The gang made their way toward the forest. It seemed like such a long walk to get there. When it seemed close, it was farther away. The air got more and more dry..the sand got more and more ferocious. The sand was probably the greatest foe any of them had faced. It was relentless.
Magneto: This sand is pissing me the hell off!
Wolverine: STORM! DO SOMETHING!
Storm: I CAN'T. My powers are virtually useless at this camp!
Skrull: Yeah. I feel slightly restricted myself.
Thor: Yes. But we must press onward!
Viper: I can see the forest!
Zero: Yeah! Not much farther, come on guys!
Viewtiful Joe struggled to keep his footing. The sandstorm was so strong it knocked him off of his feet. He flailed in the storm to no avail as he collided into an unsuspecting Doom. Doom caught Viewtiful Joe with one arm and held him tight.
Doom: Be thankful you had Doom to save you!
Viewtiful Joe: Thanks Doom. You're a pal.
Doom: Your sarcasm amuses me!
Viewtiful Joe: No sarcasm, dude.
Doom: Your words confuse me!
Deadpool: For being such a brilliant scientist you're one dumb nut.
Deadpool: I wish I was a camel right now!
Ryu: A what? Caramel? Isn't that chocolate?
Dante: CAMEL, RYU. THE ANIMAL!
Ryu: Why do you wish that, Wade?
Deadpool: What did you call me?
Ryu: Wade!
Spider-Man: WADEY!
Deadpool: SHUT UP! Anyways! Camel's are able to bat sand out of their eyes! And stuff...!
Trish: That's a dumb wish...
Felicia: I love kitty litter sand, but this is ridiculous!
Dante: So does Wolverine.
Wolverine: Watch it, bub!
Chun: I can't see anything!
The sand obscured everything in sight. It was ridiculously bad.
Arthur: Everyone, stay close!
Morrigan: Yeah, you're dead if you get lost in this storm!
Spider-Man: Ugh..I feel like I'm fighting Sandman in my 3rd movie!
Thor: I never watched that one.
Wolverine: That was the one where you tried to turn all edgy, right? Hahaha.
Wolverine scraped his claws with a grin on his face.
Spider-Man: Shut up, Logan. That was a horrible pun.
Taskmaster: Yeah, the 3rd one was definitely the worst one.
Felicia: But Peter looked so cute in it!
Dormammu: HAHAHAHA.
Spider-Man: Shut up, Mammy! Are we there yet?
Zero: No sign of land yet. I'm still scanning.
Captain America: I feel..sand..going up my buttocks!
Iron Man: Obviously not the first time, eh, Steve?
Captain America was flustered. He pointed at Tony, signaling him to shut up. Iron Man was obviously referring to the time where Deadpool had shoved sand down Captain America's pants in the 5th grade.
Wolverine: I remember that. HAHAHAHA.
Wesker: I can't wait to grab some plants from this forest..and inject them!
MODOK: You're a fool, Albert.
Wesker: SHUT UP, MODOK!
Magneto: The Master of Magnet is tired of this dreaded sand!
Deadpool: MAGNETO. WELCOME TO SAND!
Deadpool threw a sand-ball at Magneto and hit him square in the face. The sand pelted Magneto's eyes as he screamed in agony.
Magneto: DEADPOOL! YOU BITCH!
Spencer: Watch your mouth, Maggie!
Taskmaster: We have young ears. Haha..yeah! Young ears! Understand? Man, I could probably make money off of these plants in this forest!
Zero: Almost there guys!
X-23: Sand just went down my shirt! UGH!
Dante immediately went red in the face. He tried not to grin and instead he farted out of joy.
Deadpool: HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA
Iron Man: DANTE!
Dante: ...
Chun: Ewwww...HAHAHAHAHAHHA
Trish: He does that when he's excited and doesn't want to show it. I think you're arousing him, X-23.
X-23: What? Really? Dante?
Dante didn't say a word. He buried his face in the neck of his coat and avoided looking at anybody.
Ryu: What does arose mean?
Trish: Arouse.
Ryu: Yeah! What's that!
Arthur: Tell him, Morrigan.
Morrigan: Why me?
Spencer: It's obvious.
Amaterasu and Felicia giggled. Wolverine and Tony Stark listened closely.
Doom: HAHAHAHAHA. Most interesting.
Morrigan: Why am I always the one to explain..innuendos and sex jokes?
Super Skrull: Uhh...you're a succubus?
Chun: You want to rape everyone here?
Arthur: You keep telling me to pull out my "lance"?
Chris: You told me you wanted to see my real "magnum".
Dante: UUUUGHHHHH!
X-23: Hey Dante, you should let me see you do your Stinger move.
She winked at Dante, who looked back in terror as he tried to cover his lower region.
(The Stinger is Dante's most well-known move. Where he dashes a certain distance and thrusts with his sword. Always a VERY good move.)
Dante immediately gasped in horror as he stumbled.
Morrigan: AHAHAHAHAHAHAHA. Not bad, X-23.
X-23: This could be fun!
Dante: NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!
Iron Man: You are a terrible influence, Morrigan!
Morrigan: Oh and you're just a pure role model yourself, Tony!
Tony Stark immdiately shut up.
Spider-Man: You guys are a trip!
Taskmaster: LOOK. THE FOREST!
There it was. The giant forest that loomed in the distance. The one area they were safe from the relentless sand. The gang made a huge dash for the hospitality of the emerald jungle.
The gang all sprinted inside of the dense forest and marvelled at the sight. It was beautiful. Emerald green..protecting the gang from the storm. It was quiet, peaceful..relaxing. Like those places you see on TV, that you've always wanted to visit. There was a long stream of water in front of them, leading to the heart of the forest.
Birds chirped, leaves danced in the winds, and trees giggled silently at their guests, welcoming them.
X-23: This is just beautiful...
She-Hulk: I'm almost camoflauged here!
Hulk: HULK IS TOO!
Wolverine: This place is just too peaceful...
Magneto: It is slightly suspicious..
Storm: You two just can't enjoy nature can you?
Arthur: I love this forest! So..soothing! Unlike the ones in Hell!
Dormammu: There are forests in Hell? INTERESTING!
Morrigan: Arthur..you never cease to amaze me.
Arthur: Hoho!
Spider-Man: Guys..I think we spent too much time in that freaking desert out there. It's getting dark...already..
Tron: So?
Dante: Haggar is going to kill us!
Tron: So?
Zero: He's gonna put us through Hell!
Dormammu: Did someone say Hell?
Ryu: Shhhh.
Ryu hushed the gang and listened silently. There was something rummaging in the bushes nearby. Ryu walked toward the bush and listened some more.
Hsien-Ko: What is it?
Viper: Probably a little rabbit or something.
Taskmaster: I'll kill it with my arrows!
Chun: YOU BETTER NOT!
Deadpool: Yeah, you don't kill bunnies like th-
Deadpool stopped before he could even finish his sentence. His eyes went wide as he pointed to the large figure behind Ryu.
Deadpool: R-R-Ryu...what..is that?
Ryu raised an eyebrow at Deadpool and laughed.
Ryu: It's a bush! Haha!
Ryu whirled around, only to be met by a firm being full of fur. The giant creature breathed heavily as it stared down at Ryu. It had the physique of a bear..but it was much larger. It was difficult to make out with barely any light..but everyone knew it was not friendly.
Spider-Man: That...
Dante: is...
Chris: not...
Zero: good.
Ryu's eyes were as large as dinner plates. He quickly delivered a haymaker to the creature's gut, but it was almost as if he was punching a brick wall.
Ryu: Oh my Tatsumaki...!
The creature raised its paw and slapped the living shit out of Ryu. He went soaring deep within the forest and landed in the stream of water located at the heart of the forest. All of the trees that were in Ryu's path before were absolutely destroyed after.
The gang was speechless. As they sat there..awestruck..the creature began to walk forward. As it did so..the crew immediately scattered and ran for their lives.
Deadpool: RUN AWAY!
Iron Man: Wait..how do we get out of here?
Wolverine: It's too dark to see! Which way did we come from!
The chaos began to overwhelm the gang as they struggled, panicked, and fought. They all began to run in one direction, tripping over each other and shoving. The creature was on the move, right on their tails.
Arthur and Doom began to quickly fall behind of the group. Doom was breathing heavily as he tried to keep up with Arthur, who was slowly leaving him behind.
Doom hopped over logs that obstructed his run, but failed to see the tree limb that sat in his way. He smacked into the tree limb and fell on his ass, screaming all the way. He looked back and noticed the shadowy creature approaching him. He tried to stand, but thought that it was just inevitable.
Doom: DOOM IS FUCKED!
Arthur heard the scream and the sound of metal being pounded and thrown. His eyes went wide as he hastened his sprint to try and catch up to the group.
Dante, Spider-Man, and She-Hulk led the pack. They were sprinting as fast as they could until they looked back and noticed that the creature was gone. They saw Arthur way behind, waving at them to stop so he could catch up. Trish panted heavily after the ordeal while Amaterasu hadn't broken a sweat.
She-Hulk laughed as she casually walked backwards.
She-Hulk: That was way too easy! That thing won't be able to catch us!
Magneto: Uhh..where is Doom?
Captain America: ...Uh oh..
Phoenix: I think Victor has been captured by that thing!
Viper: Who cares? Let's keep moving..before it finds us..
Iron Man: Agreed.
She-Hulk smirked as she turned to walk ahead of everyone else. She heard a rumble in the bushes nearby and became more alert than ever. Well...except for the things in front of her. Her foot caught something on the forest floor and it quickly snatched her upside down much to everyone's surprise.
Dante: Traps?
She-Hulk: Uhh..guys? Can you help a girl out?
As she said this, the rumbles increased..and the creature emerged from the bushes. His glowing eyes noticeable from miles away.
Spencer: RRRRUUUUUUUUNNNNNNNNNNNN!
Spencer was the first one to haul ass down the path, Dante and Chris following. The gang had completely abandoned She-Hulk..to be annihilated by the monster.
She-Hulk: !
Hulk stopped in his tracks as he heard the scream. She was family after all. Hulk turned around and growled as he punched the ground.
Wolverine: Hulk, NO!
The Hulk sprinted toward the monster and punched it with all of his might, staggering it.
Hulk: HULK IS STRONGEST THERE IS!
As Hulk screamed, a huge shockwave rattled the forest. It was the creature punching The Hulk..and the Hulk screamed.
Hulk: HULK FEEL !
The gang cringed at the shockwave. Wolverine grunted as he continued running, helping Arthur keep up.
Skrull tripped over a log and tumbled into Tron, who fell down and rolled into a giant pit, another trap set for the unsuspecting guests.
The gang felt no remorse for Tron as she screamed in the hole, demanding assistance. No one listened, and instead, they continued running.
Tron: I'm going to kill you all when I get out of here!
Tron: Hello?
The gang continued their running as they came to a giant fork in the path. One lead right, the other left. It was too dark to see where each path lead, but the gang didn't care in the least.
Spencer: Which way? WHICH WAY!
Arthur: Left! No right!
Deadpool: Right is always the best choice!
Magneto: Imbeciles! If we go right, it will lead us to the heart of this dreaded forest and we'll never escape!
X-23: We can't just sit here and not do anything!
Wesker: Yes. We'll all go right and Magneto will go left. Alone.
Magneto: Wait just a second, Wesker!
Spider-Man: Awwww! Maggie is afraid to go by himself! How cute.
MODOK: I predict left is the better choice!
Storm: Well? What are we waiting for!
Phoenix: Let's just split up! Whoever wants to go left, go! And same for the right!
Chris: Alright, let's go!
Dormammu: Splitting up is most unwise..that's what that animal WANTS us to do!
As the group argued more and more, the omnious being approached them once more. As it stood behind the group listening to them argue, it studied them carefully, choosing its next target.
They argued and argued as two members were abruptly kidnapped without their notice.
Dante: Yeah, we totally can't split up. That's worst case scenario. We have to stick together. Power in numbers!
Arthur: Dante is correct. Let us all travel together through this dreaded vinery.
Chris: Vinery?
Arthur: Forest.
Thor: I understood.
Spencer: Good for you.
Phoenix: Ever had that feeling...like...you were being watched?
Deadpool: Yeah, Bugs Bunny and those cartoons always said stuff like that.
Taskmaster: You know what? Fuck you guys and your suspense. I'm outta here.
Taskmaster was true to his word. As he spoke, he darted off in a random direction. Little did he know, however, he was just travelling even deeper into the forest. On his way to meet Ryu.
Magneto: Imbecile!
Deadpool's eyes went wide once more, as it did in the first chapter. His breathing turned into a heavy pant as his finger slowly pointed at the one thing that terrified him beyond belief.
Wesker began to walk down the left path. He pushed up on his shades as he snorted at the others. Magneto followed him.
Deadpool: G-g-g-guys...
Dante: I guess we're following them.
Arthur: Indeed.
Deadpool: G-g-g-guys...seriously...
Viewtiful Joe: C'mon, Deadpool. You're gonna get left behind. Hey, what are you pointi-
The enormous bear grinned sadistically at the two jokers. It had Storm and Captain America in its arms. They showed no sign of movement as they were as limp as a wet noodle.
Viewtiful Joe: Oh...so..that's...what you were...
Deadpool: Yeah.
The Bear: ...
Viewtiful Joe: ...
Deadpool: ...
The Bear: ...
Viewtiful Joe: ...
Deadpool: What is with all these dots?
Viewtiful Joe: !
Viewtiful Joe's stubby legs stumbled as he whirled around. Deadpool twisted his body around so violently, he ended up punting Viewtiful Joe ahead by at least 30 feet.
Wesker turned around and looked. As he saw Viewtiful Joe flying overhead he knew something was not right. His coat billowed in the darkness as he sprinted ahead of the group. Spencer grabbed Arthur and began to sprint as well.
The Bear dropped his two victims, knowing they weren't going to be moving anytime soon. It immediately began to pursue them.
Magneto was beginning to wheeze. His old age was beginning to get the best of him. How he wish he could levitate.
Dante: Maggie! Come on!
Magneto fell behind the group. He struggled to keep up as he slowed to an elderly jog. He had to catch his breath, but he knew that meant his demise.
Super Skrull couldn't help but giggle at Magneto's predicament, but quickly frowned as the bear pounced on the senior citizen.
X-23: MAGNETO!
MODOK: Oh shit, my chair is malfunctioning! Something is triggering termination!
Wolverine: What does that mean?
Modok was rapidly pressing buttons on his chair as he panicked. His eyes went wide as he stopped. He looked at his fellow companions as he waved bye-bye. His chair exploded, sending MODOK miles into the sky.
Phoenix: WHAT IS GOING ON?
Deadpool: Run, ask questions later!
Trish: We're not gonna make it out of this place!
Amaterasu: We will survive. We will!
Chris: Easy for you to say! You're a dog!
Amaterasu: That's SUN GOD to you!
Spider-Man: CALM DOWN YOU GUYS!
Iron Man: How? When a giant bear the size of God's dick is chasing us!
Dante: How do you know how big God's dick is?
Iron Man: Tactical assumption.
Deadpool: Assume makes an "Ass" out of "U" and "Me"!
Viewtiful Joe: My science teacher told me that joke!
Deadpool: DO I LOOK LIKE A SCIENCE TEACHER TO YOU?
Morrigan: You are all idiots! Keep moving!
Spencer: Hey look! A clearing! It might be our ticket out of this fucking jungle!
Super Skrull stretched his arm out and grabbed a nearby tree. As he let go, he shot ahead of the group and emerged through the clearing. He stopped and gazed at the moon. It was a dead end. There was nothing but a cliff and a giant waterfall.
His eyes narrowed as he turned around, glancing at Spencer and Arthur who were right behind him.
Arthur: This really...how do you kids say it these days...sucks the donkey balls!
Spencer: This sucks donkey balls.
Arthur: That's what I just said!
Thor: Whatever do we do now!
Morrigan: Mhmhmhm...we're kinda screwed. We might as well die happy.
She smiled as Arthur looked at her with a puzzled expression on his face.
Arthur: Oh no, temptress! I'm not pulling out my lance anytime soon!
Spider-Man, Dante, and Chris all burst out laughing.
Iron Man was the last to approach the clearing. He finally met up with the others and saw the cliff. In an exasperated sigh, he cried.
Iron Man: This sucks donkey balls!
Spencer and Arthur: THAT'S WHAT WE JUST SAID!
Viewtiful Joe: Donkey balls? Why are we talking about donkey testicles?
Dante: Man, I miss Ryu.
Chun: Normally he'd ask some sort of stupid question like, "WHAT ARE DONKEY BALLS? DURRRR"!
Chris: "Are they balls only donkeys can play with?"
Trish: Considering he had a hard time understanding what golf balls were...yeah..
X-23: I miss him too.
Zero: Is he really that stupid?
Chun: Oh my god yes.
Wesker: Is this how we're really going to spend the last minutes of our lives? Reminiscing about our retarded housemate and talking about donkey genitals?
Dormammu: Correct. We should be formulating a plan..like how we're going to kill this...abomination.
Wolverine: I'm going to get Hulk back.
Dante: Ah..secret lovers. How cute.
Wolverine violently pointed one claw at Dante.
Wolverine: Don't start with me, bub. I'm going to show this bear who the REAL animal is.
Wolverine howled at the moon as he stomped off, anger in each of his steps. Thor drew his hammer and followed Wolverine.
Thor: I shall assist you, Logan.
Wolverine: Thanks, Thor.
Chris: Hey, Wolverine. We gotta have a meeting point. In case you guys are in trouble..we should meet back here. It should be easy to find.
Wolverine: Good idea. The cliff it is.
Wolverine and Thor disappeared through the brush to confront the mysterious animal.
Dormammu: Now what?
C. Viper: We can't just sit here and do nothing. I think we may need to split up. The bear will have a hard time finding us if we do.
Dante: But he's so fast and has so much endurance. We're toast if we go in smaller numbers.
Phoenix: But, we're toast anyway. I mean, atleast then we'd have a better chance of SOMEONE making it out.
X-23: Maybe we should split up...
Wesker: Maybe this, maybe that! Make up your damn minds and execute. I'm tired of this constant babbling about the same shit over and over again!
Chris: Well if you're so tired of us, then go off by yourself! Get killed! See if we care!
Iron Man: Now is not the time to argue guys.
Spencer: Oh where do you get off on your high-horse, rich boy?
Iron Man: At least I have money. And I'm not some washed up, ex-soldier. This suit costs more than everything you've spent money on your entire life.
Spencer: Your bragging...your arrogance...I'VE HAD ENOUGH!
Iron Man: The only thing we have in common is women, and even then you STILL have bad taste.
Spencer: Considering you'd bone a drunken transvestite, that's not saying much.
Iron Man: I will tear that arm to pieces.
Spencer: And I'd like to see you try.
Iron Man was seconds from pulling out his Proton Cannon. But before he could, Spencer had already latched his arm to Iron Man's suit. Iron Man gasped as Spencer was already in his face, reeling back his arm for a massive punch.
Dante: SPENCER, STOP!
Chris: No, SPENCER!
Spencer: BIONIC...
Zero: What are you guys doing?
Before Spencer landed his punch, time went to a slowdown. The two looked at each other before the punch connected.
Spencer: You..you won't tear this arm. This arm means more to me than you could imagine.
Iron Man: Oh yeah? How's that? Is that a souvenir of your crappy life?
Spencer: No. It's my wife.
Iron Man gasped in horror as he remembered Captain America talking of a soldier like Spencer at a S.H.I.E.L.D meeting.
Iron Man: You're..the Bionic Commando!
Spencer nodded. Afterwards, he finished his attack.
Spencer: ARRRRRRRRRMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMM!
Spencer punched Iron Man with all of his might, putting a giant dent in Iron Man's armor. Iron Man went flying off of the cliff and began to plunge down the waterfall.
Dante ran to the edge of the cliff and looked to see if Iron Man was there. Nothing in sight, but a loud waterfall and glistening water in the moonlight.
Before Spencer could enjoy his victory, a ticking was heard. He looked everywhere but couldn't spot a thing. It was the ticking of a smart bomb.
Zero: Where is that coming from?
C. Viper: It's coming from...I don't know..
Chun: It sounds close, but it's really distant..
Spider-Man: Uhh..hey, Spen-
Before Spider-Man could finish his scream, the bomb exploded and Spencer went flying. Down the same waterfall as Iron Man did. He was seconds from being unconcious, trying to muster the strength to shoot his arm to latch onto something, but to no avail.
Chris: SPENCER!
X-23: Oh my god...
Wesker: What fools...or maybe this was for the best. Come, we must move.
Dante: No! We can't leave them!
Wesker: What can we do, Dante? You're false optimism disgusts me. There is NOTHING we can do. The darkness is mind-numbing enough as it is. That waterfall is massive. There's nothing we can do. And even if we could, why would we?
Spider-Man: They're our friends.
Wesker: Ha, friends! Friends will do nothing but bring about the end of you. You rely too much on them, what will you do when they're not there?
Chris: Keep moving.
Wesker: And you would know all about that, wouldn't you, Chris? You thought Jill was dead. So you spent your life worrying and blaming yourself. How better off would you have been if you had never met her? If you had never befriended her?
Chris: Your mind is twisted Wesker.
Deadpool: Someone pass me the popcorn? Please? Extra butter..I love me some butter.
Wesker: No, my mind is full of the truth, and you can't accept it.
Dante: Friends are what make our lives worth living.
Wesker: Yes, just for them to betray you and lie to you behind your back in the end. And then you wish you never met them!
Zero: That's when you pick the right ones to rely on. The ones that WON'T betray you. You spend your life thinking about the negative, when behind it all, you're just miserable because you can't experience the joy of friendship. You don't have a life worth living, Wesker. And I saw that 5 minutes after meeting you.
Wesker: Pah. All of you are fools.
Chris: No, you're the fool, Wesker.
Wesker stared at Chris and smiled. His smile turned into a growl as he trudged off into the dense forest. Before he got too far, he turned around.
Wesker: If I'm the only one to survive this ordeal, you can only blame yourselves for not following a God.
Amaterasu: You're no God, Wesker.
Phoenix: You're a fool.
Wesker growled. He couldn't stand the fact of someone else calling him a fool. He hissed as he whirled around and stomped through the tormenting forest.
Dormammu: Interesting.
Dante: You gonna follow?
Dormammu: Perhaps. I do want to see how he faces the reality of being alone.
C. Viper: What are we going to do?
Dante: I'm going to find Ryu.
Chris: So am I.
Spider-Man: I'll go too.
X-23: I'll follow you guys.
Arthur: I shall accompany you four.
Chun: As will I.
Trish: And me.
Deadpool: Me and Joe are going to go find an exit. This place sucks.
Joe: It sure does.
Amaterasu: I'll go with you guys.
Dormammu: I'm going to go watch over Wesker. If things get dirty, I'm hauling ass.
Dante: Never thought you'd say something like that.
Dormammu: I'm not going to sugarcoat the truth.
Zero: I'll go and see if Iron Man and Spencer are alright.
C. Viper: I'll go with you.
Super Skrull: And me.
Phoenix: I'll follow too.
Chris: Alright, if things get hairy, we'll meet here.
Zero: Right.
Super Skrull: What about Modok?
Dormammu: Same with Magneto. We leave them.
Joe: No, we can't do that.
Dormammu: Hahaha, do what you must. Don't get killed now.
Dormammu walked off through the brush, the same way Wesker went.
Chun: I think..I think Wesker was a little frustrated. Maybe he was speaking out of anger?
Chris: Anger? What anger?
Chun: All of his closest friends are gone. Doctor Doom was captured, Magneto was captured, and Modok is...gone. Maybe..those are really his friends. Maybe he regrets he couldn't save them...
Spider-Man: He's horrible at showing his emotions.
X-23: The look on his face when Doom was caught is enough to believe that Chun-Li is right.
Dante: Maybe you can't blame the guy..he's beating himself up inside.
Amaterasu: And that's no good.
Phoenix: What are we waiting for?
Chris: Let's move.
The group scattered into their individual directions. Maybe..maybe they will find their way out of this dreaded forest. Maybe they will find their friends along the way.
Will Wesker overcome his remorse? Will Taskmaster find his own way out? Will Dante and co. find Ryu? Will Zero and co. find the two rivals, Spencer and Iron Man? Will Wolverine and Thor defeat the mysterious bear and save the Hulk and She-Hulk?
Will Arthur finally master the slang of the world? What happened to MODOK? What is this bear? And...where exactly did Felicia and Hsein-Ko go?
All of this next time!
Guys I am ridiculously sorry. It's been FOREVER since I've updated this thing and I truly apologize. I've been overwhelmed with schoolwork, work, personal problems..just a bunch of crap. It's been a long time coming and I'm truly sorry.
I know the game has been out for..a LONG time..but I'm going to treat it as if it's still been in development. I have Spring Break this week, so hopefully I don't develop writer's block and not do anything.
MVC3 is really good by the way. I'm kinda..disappointed that they didn't include a story mode, but it's whatever. I pretty much suck with everybody, but I'm at least somewhat decent with Zero and Super Skrull.
Once again, I'm sorry guys. I'll try not to take so long next time haha.