A/N-SO MANY WONDERFUL REVIEWS! THANK YOU! EIGHT MORE REVIEWS AND I'LL REVIEW TOMORROW! THANKS AGAIN! REVIEW, AGAIN, PLEASE!
After the Bloodbath the cannons begin to sound. It's absolutely horrific. One after the other until all souls are accounted for. I know one of those cannons belong to the girl Peeta killed. I wonder if he regrets it. I wonder if he feels sorry at all for what he did.
What would I feel if I had killed someone? What would I feel to know that I had taken away someone's lover? What if they had a family to get back to? To know I deliberately took away someone's future? I don't think I'd be able to live with myself. How can the Careers do it as a sport?
The Careers don't feel. They are the hunters and everyone else is the prey. They need the prize. They don't care about the cost. They believe they will win. There is no doubt in their mind. In some sick way they enjoy the kills. They savor the last breath their victim takes. They don't make their victim's death fast, they enjoy every last minute of it. Life to them is disposable. They were trained to kill with no mercy and that's exactly what they do.
I pictured Peeta in terrible situations. I once dreamt of him being chased by a pack of Careers. I dreamt of him dying of dehydration. I imagined him giving up and committing suicide. I pictured many things, many terrible scenarios, but I never could've possibly dreamt of this. Who would've thought he would pair up with the Careers? If he wanted an ally why didn't he just partner up with Katniss? They would've made a wonderful team!
I don't realize the town square has been clearing out until Gale nudges me. I smile at him. He returns a tight lipped one. I sometimes wonder if he's different in the woods. Does he smile a big toothy grin? Does he laugh out loud? Does he joke around? I don't know. I probably never will.
Katniss always said that she felt freer in the woods. She never felt like she was being watched. She never had to hold her tongue. She had the power to say and do whatever she pleased. I always thought she was so lucky to know that kind of freedom. I crave that kind of freedom on a daily basis.
I begin to walk with Gale outside of the town square while my mind continues to wander. My mother used to tell me stories about a free government. The people used to have a say to who governed them. They had rights. They could say whatever they wished. Panem used to be the United States of America, a free country for all.
There were other countries, too. You were allowed to flee from one country to the next. How crazy is that? Why can't we have that? Why were the people so stupid? Their lives were perfect. Perfect! How could they just screw that up for the rest of us?
Sometimes I believe I was born in the wrong time. Sometimes I think that I was supposed to be born during the United States of America and enjoy the luxuries of life. I would never have the feeling of someone always watching. Someone always waiting for me to say something wrong.
I wonder if my mother wouldn't be sick. I wonder if my father would be home. I wonder if Peeta would be my lover. These are all fantasies of course, but you just have to wonder what it could've been like.
I glance at my surroundings and notice Gale at my side. Jeez, I really blanked out. I hate it when you get lost in thought. I always hate coming back to reality.
I stare at Gale. We already passed his house a while ago. "My mom told me to walk you home."
I nod. "Oh." Of course his mother said to. He wouldn't do it willingly. Would he?
"Whatcha been thinking about?"
"America." The foreign word rolls off my tongue. It sounds funny in the air.
"What?"
"America used to be where Panem was. Oh, Gale, it was wonderful! They had all these rights and a free country! They were free!"
"Where'd you hear that?"
"My mother told me all about it in my bedtime stories when I was little."
We fall into silence. We normally do. The only thing that changes is who decides to break it.
My mother had also told me that there were no Hunger Games in this country. They celebrated real holidays. No one had to die. No one lost a loved one. There were actual reasons to celebrate. Christmas was a holiday my mother talked about a lot. She said that children would receive presents from a jolly old man named Santa. He would only give presents to the good children and coal to the bad. I believe both are good presents. You always need coal to heat your house. My kids will never meet the man they call Santa.
Gale moseys silently next to me. He has hunter's feet. I've always wondered if my footsteps sound loud to him. I think they're pretty quiet, but Gale might have a different opinion.
We reach my house quickly. I don't want to face my father alone. Maybe he won't even be there. He might, though. Ugh, I might as well invite him…
"Do you want to come inside?"
"I really couldn't," he insists. Come one, work with me!
"Please?"
"I don't know…"
I eventually grab his hand and tug him inside. I know he's much stronger than me. I know he can probably break away from my grasp with very little effort, but he doesn't. He follows me obediently into the house. I can't face my father alone, and he'll be nicer in front of guests. Hopefully. My plan could totally backfire. It's known to do that.
I open the door as quietly as I can to not disturb my mother. The maids and butlers are scurrying around trying to finish their jobs. I have numerous people in and out of this house, so I usually don't bother to remember names. I'm used to foreign faces by now.
Gale doesn't look too comfortable with the extra company. I amble up to Theo and ask him to look after my mother. He raises his eyebrows at me and looks at Gale.
"Okay. Behave you two."
"We're just friends," I sigh. Theo doesn't look too convinced as he forces the other maid up with him to check on my mother.
"Alone at last," I sigh. Gale tentatively takes a few steps closer.
"Are they always around?" I nod. "Doesn't it bother you?"
"Very much so." I stride over to the kitchen and think of anything I can make. "Are you hungry? Do you want anything?"
"No thanks."
Okay…what am I supposed to do now? The Games are still on. I see them playing on the television in the living room. I try to ignore the sounds of the screaming children.
He spots the piano in the living room. "Do you play?" I nod. "Can I hear you?"
"Sure." An odd request, but I'll do it anyway. I make my way to the grand piano and scan the keys while I sit on the bench. I haven't played in a while. "Was there anything you had in mind?"
Gale has also taken a seat next to me on the piano bench. "I don't know any songs."
"Oh, okay." I decide to play something light and cheery to distract from the television. I also try to ignore Gale's proximity to me.
I start off a little scratchy. I miss a couple of notes. I hold a key for too long. My fingers don't move fast enough during some parts. Eventually, though, I lose myself in the music. I close my eyes and think of happy things. Most of my thoughts revolve around Peeta.
The tune slowly draws to an end, and I wait for Gale to say something. He doesn't. I open my eyes to find him staring at me.
"Was I that bad?" I suddenly become self-conscious. I haven't played for a long time.
"No, you were really good."
My cheeks turn an embarrassing color. "Thanks."
We haven't got this whole conversation thing down yet. Sometimes we'll get lucky and find something to talk about, but other times we usually end up in silence.
"You were saying something about...America? What was that all about?"
"The United Stated of America?" He nods. This should be fun.
We spend the rest of the time blabbing about America. We imagine the freedom that came with this country. So close, yet so far. I told him of the different holidays they celebrated. I told him that the Hunger Games never existed. They never would exist in this free country because of what they believed in.
Gale is so fascinated with this idea of America. He listens keenly to every word I say. He never interrupts.
That's how we spend the rest of our day. We talk about the country we will never live in, but will always dream of.
A/N-THANKS FOR ALL OF THE REVIEWS! REVIEW AGAIN, PLEASE! EIGHT MORE REVIEWS AND I'LL UPDATE TOMORROW! REVIEW!