Lesser of Two Evils

(AN: Again part of the Challenge. Enjoy the stupidity. Phoenix Wright and respective characters belong to Capcom.

Challenge: write Gumshoe x Miles + Franziska involving a frying pan and a spoon.)

While it was true different prosecutors reacted differently to the same situation, Gumshoe had discovered the hard way that Franziska Von Karma did not handle waiting well, as those who did not arrive at her office at the time specified had their faces acquainted with her whip. Having suffered the wrath of that infernal piece of leather several times himself, Gumshoe made a point of arriving at her office early, so that he could make it through his day with relatively few new welts (as NO welts was an uncommon occurrence when the young Von Karma was involved).

Today, however, Gumshoe found his feet dragging as he made his way down the oaken hallways of the prosecutors office. If the yelling coming from the 18 year-old prodigy's office was any indication, anyone who walked into the office right now would be promptly beaten into hamburger. Gumshoe, being rather fond of his face in non-ground beef form, was tempted to go sit out Franziska's temper tantrum in the break room. However, the instructions from the Chief of Detectives was quite explicit, as though aware of his scruffy officer's aversion to the lady prosecutor's office, in stating the report needed to be delivered immediately. And gumshoe, for whatever else he was, did follow orders (except for the time He helped Phoenix break into Chief Gant's office, but Gumshoe liked to pretend that didn't happen).

The yelling became more articulate at gumshoe warily approached Franziska's office. The voices belonged to Edgeworth and Franziska and, judging by the amount of fools being uttered but the latter, the argument was not going well. As Gumshoe finally reached the doorframe, the arguing died down, heartened by the lull; he put his hand on the door handle. Naturally, the argument escalated as he did so.

"I don't see how you can foolishly believe that this foolishly foolish statement will mean anything little brother."

Edgeworth's retort held an edge that indicated he was reaching the end of his patience, "Look Franziska, I don't see how it's any of you business. I said I'm taken and that should be the end of it."

Gumshoe slowly pushed the door in as Franziska retorted, "Fool, I know you are not seeing any woman at this time, so why continue with this charade."

Edgeworth pinched the bridge of his nose, "Look, I didn't say-"

He stopped as he saw Gumshoe meekly peek into the room. "Sorry to interrupt, Ms. Von Karma, but I have a document from the Chief of Detectives for you."

Edgeworth felt a smug smile turn the corners of his lips, and he gave Gumshoe a 'play along or I will dock your pay again' look. "Detective you were just in time. I guess our secrets out."

Now, gumshoe was dense, but not dense enough to ignore the signs, however he was unsure as to what Edgeworth was getting at, so he simply managed a weak, "Y-yeah?"

Knowing this was he only opportunity he'd have to get out of Franziska's clutches for a while, Edgeworth performed the act of a man choosing between the lesser of two evils. He walked up and kissed a very stunned and confused Gumshoe. Franziska's reaction was what was to be expected, although she used a plate and a spoon on her desk instead of her whip. Needless to say Gumshoe avoided the Prosecutor's office for a couple weeks, and was greeted on his next visit with a frying pan to the head courtesy of Franziska (that last part of the incident made Edgeworth almost sorry he hid her whip. Almost).

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