Johnny felt no pain, only a deep emptiness. He tried to move, but only his eyes responded to the effort. The vent alarm went off as sweat beaded down Johnny's face. Oh, God, I'm so tired and I don't even know why.

Johnny couldn't stop the tears. The breathing tube prevented his attempts to groan or speak. What is going on? Why can't I feel my arms or legs? He began to panic as he tried to move his head, and found it wouldn't move where he wanted to look. The alarm continued to beep. Is anyone going to turn that thing off?

"Shh, Johnny, it's okay," soothed the voice of an angel as she lay a cool cloth on his head. "Let me reset this alarm and see about getting you more comfortable." The alarm was silenced, and Johnny felt the pillows behind his head move as the nurse adjusted them. "I'm Julie and I'll be here all night. Don't be alarmed about not moving. We've given you something to keep you still." She brushed a stray lock of hair off Johnny's forehead. "I'm going to get Dr. Brackett, okay? I'll be right back."

Johnny watched her go, then explored the room with his eyes. He noticed the numerous tubes extending from his bed to various pieces of equipment beside the bed. He also noticed the dim lights and heard the distinct hums and beeps of that equipment around him. I must be at Rampart, in ICU. What happened, though? Brackett will let me know. He's always straight with me. She did say she was going to get him, didn't she?

He blinked back the sweat dripping into his eyes. Oh man, I'm hot. Someone better hurry up and tell me what's going on. He tried to quell the continuing panic rising in him, but a tear escaped his tired eyes. I think I'm in trouble this time.

Julie appeared at his side again. "Dr. Brackett is on the way, Johnny," she assured him. "I know you can't talk, but let's try this. Blink once for yes and twice for no. Okay, let's see yes," she encouraged him with a smile.

Okay, if I must. Maybe I'll get some answers this way. He blinked once.

"Now, let's see no."

Blink, blink. Man, I'm so tired. Hurry up and tell me what's wrong with me. And where's Roy?

"Are you in any pain?" Blink, blink. "I think you're very warm, though, right?" she asked as she read 101.2 on thermometer. Johnny blinked once.

Julie's pleasant smile disappeared briefly, but she pasted it on again. Johnny stared hard at her, willing his eyes to stay open. He heard a door opening and the sound of Brackett's heavy footsteps. "How's it going, Julie?"

"His temp is up to 101.2," she informed him. "He's fairly alert, though, and is trying to communicate. He's blinking twice for no and once for yes."

"I'll write orders to increase the dosage on the antibiotic," Brackett ordered. "I want to be sure we keep away any complications."

Okay Doc, give me some answers. What's going on? Johnny tried to find Brackett's eyes to let him know he was waiting for some details.

"Johnny, do you know where you are?" Blink.

"Do you know what happened?" Blink, blink.

Brackett sighed. "Johnny, you were shot, twice." Johnny's eyes stayed focused on Brackett as he tried to remember the details. "Apparently, there was some sort of cross-fire, and you took one bullet in the chest and another in your neck. We haven't taken the bullet out of your neck yet, which is why you can't feel anything.

Johnny tried to breathe, but all he could do was to let the machine do its mechanical bidding. He tried to move his head, but his damaged neck wouldn't allow him to do anything other than look up at Brackett and stare. He tried to scream out for some sort of release, but no sound came from his attempts. Panic clung to his heart and mind, and he couldn't control the many tears that now slipped away from his eyes. Betrayed by my own emotions, and I can't do a damn thing about it!

Johnny couldn't feel Julie pick up his hand and squeeze it, conveying her sympathy for his situation. He didn't know that Brackett had had a vise grip on his arm while conveying the details of his injuries.

"We have you on the vent to give your lungs a chance to heal from the chest wound," Brackett was explaining, although he could tell a distracted Johnny probably wasn't hearing him. "I've got you in cervical traction to keep your back in alignment. We'll keep monitoring your neck as the swelling goes down, and as soon as we can, we'll operate to try to repair the damage. I suspect that this paralysis will be temporary."

That word caught Johnny's attention. Temporary? Thank God! I won't be able to take more than a few days of living like this.

Then Brackett burst his bubble. "But we'll have to wait and see." He paused as he saw the despair in Johnny's eyes. "I'm going to increase your sedative so you can get some more sleep. You need to give your body a chance to heal, Johnny. I have every hope that you will make a full recovery. You've got to believe that."

Johnny closed his eyes. This has to be a nightmare. There was no shooting, I'm not really here. I'm going to wake up in a few hours and everything will be fine.

Johnny clung desperately to that thought as he allowed his tired mind to nod off again.