A/N- Enjoy~
It's in the early hours of the morning when I stumble through the front door. Tears trickle down my face as I loudly make my way to my room, not caring if anyone hears me.
Exhausted, I fall onto my bed like a rag doll. I scream into my pillow, venting my frustration. I want someone in this damned house to confront me. Let them yell at me! Let them beat me! I really don't care anymore.
I glance over at my clock to see that it's four in the morning. I moan and roll over onto my side, trying to fall asleep. My thoughts are plagued by the man I yearn to be loved by.
Realizing that sleep is determined to remain elusive, I decide to go out for some fun. I quickly go to the bathroom to put on some heavy black eye makeup and dark red lipstick. I tease my hair to give it some volume. I sprint back to my closet and pick out a short black dress and a pair of nude pumps. I grin mischievously and hurry down the stairs as best as I can in these high heels.
The air outside is crisp and a little cold. It's so dark and quiet that I'm a little frightened. I keep walking, though, and try not to think about how scared I am as I make my way to the bar in the Seam. I need to get drunk tonight to get my mind off of things. Hey, maybe I'll even hook up with a guy.
I finally arrive at the bar, and I kind of expect it to be empty. When I do enter, though, there are a couple of people. They stare at me, and I know that they're wondering why the mayor's daughter is in a bar in the Seam.
I make my way straight to the counter and tell the bartender to give me the strongest drink she has. She nods and quickly gives me a glass of a mysterious liquid.
"Thank you," I mumble, and she nods again.
I quickly drink the alcohol, wincing at how strong it is. Staring at my glass, I notice that some of my red lipstick rubbed off on the edge of the cup. I scrunch my nose and ask the bartender for another glass.
"Sure," she says as she pours more of the liquid into my cup.
"Thanks," I say again while she hurries over to a man drunk on the other side of the bar.
I take a large swig from my glass and wince again because the taste is very strong. I'm not a big drinker. The only other time I've been to a bar was when I went with Patrick; that memory seems so old now.
I have a couple more glasses of the same strong alcohol, and I can barely think straight. I can feel it coursing through my veins, making me feel alive.
A man comes over to the counter and sits next to me. He's dirty with coal dust caked underneath his fingernails. He stares at me, and it's making me uncomfortable.
"Can I help you," I slur.
He smiles, showing the few dirty teeth he has left.
"I was wondering why a pretty girl like you is in a bar like this," he says with a weird expression on his face. The more he talks, the more uneasy I feel.
"I had a bad day. I needed a drink," I say simply. He moves closer to me, and I am getting nervous now. "If you don't mind, I kind of want to be alone."
"Ah, don't be like that," he says as he places a hand high on my thigh.
It takes a moment for me to register what he was doing. When his hand ducks underneath my dress, though, I quickly stand up and distance myself from him. I'm so drunk, though, I wobble a little on my feet.
"Pervert," I yell at him, horrified. I say it much louder than I intended, though.
The other people in the bar begin to take notice of our conservation. He notices this, too.
"I'm sorry," he says quietly as he gets up, too. "Forgive me, I didn't mean to make you uncomfortable."
He walks closer to me, and I stumble back.
"Stay away from me," I warn.
Another man, young and handsome, walks into the middle of our exchange. My heart is racing so fast that I can barely register what's happening.
"Is everything ok," the young man asks.
"He," I say, pointing to the other man, "tried to feel me up."
"It was a joke," the dirty man stresses, laughing. "You damned townies are way too dramatic."
I was about to yell at him, but the handsome guy cut me off.
"Leave."
This took the guy who felt me up by surprise.
"What did you say to me?"
The young man is expressionless as he moves closer and whispers something into his ear. The man who touched me stares at the other man for a long time before he finally leaves the bar. I exhale, relieved.
"Thank you so much," I say immediately.
"You're welcome," the stranger says.
He begins to turn away from me, but I grab his arm. All of this alcohol is making me much braver than I usually am.
"What's your name," I ask hurriedly.
He smiles as he stares into my bright blue eyes.
"Ross. Yours?"
I pause because he doesn't recognize me.
"Felicity," I lie.
He doesn't notice my hesitation or my lie.
"It's nice to meet you," Ross says politely. "I'm so sorry about that other guy."
"It's not your fault," I say.
My heart is racing because tonight I'm not Madge.
We fall into silence, so I decide to break it.
"What are you doing here so early," I ask.
"I was actually looking for my friend. I was supposed to meet him up this morning. He wasn't at his house. I thought that he might've been here. You?"
"Rough night," I say simply.
He nods.
We grow quiet again. I notice that he looks a lot like Gale. His build is very similar to Gale's. His eyes are the same shade of grey. His skin is the same olive color. His hair is the same dark shade. I wonder if he's also a good kisser like Gale is…
"Can I get you a drink," I ask, interrupting my thoughts.
"For what?"
"For being my hero," I answer with a giggle.
"It was nothing," he replies.
"Let me get you a drink," I say.
"It was nothing," he repeats.
"Stop being stubborn," I say with a mischievous smile.
"Ok."
He smiles as he follows me to the counter.
"Get us two glasses of the strong stuff," I say to the bartender.
She returns with two glasses. I thank her and take a large sip. Ross does as well.
"This stuff is really strong," he says.
"I know," I say with a laugh that doesn't sound like mine.
He smiles at me and finishes the rest of his alcohol. I finish mine as well and ask the bartender for some more.
Before I know it, we both are very drunk. Very. He rambles about nonsense, and I can't stop giggling.
"You're hot," he says with a deep laugh.
"You're hot," I say back, chuckling.
"You're hotter."
"You're hottest," I state.
"No, you are."
"No, you are," I repeat, laughing again.
"How much alcohol did you have," Ross asks, chuckling.
"A lot."
We eventually stop laughing. I stare into his grey eyes, and he stares into my blue ones. He really does look a lot like Gale. I start to think of Gale, and a mix of emotions begins to wash over me. I stare at his lips, and I yearn to be kissed; I yearn to be loved.
I lean into Ross suddenly and kiss him. He kisses me back. His lips are on mine for a long time, but it's not like Gale's kiss. It's not like Peeta's kiss. Our kiss is flat, meaningless. Ross doesn't seem to notice, though, because he continues to kiss me roughly.
His hands end up in my hair and mine end up wrapped around his neck.
I hear hoots from the rest of the people in the bar. Embarrassed, I break the kiss and remove my hands from around his neck. The people in the bar express their disappointment, but I simply laugh nervously and focus my gaze on the floor.
When I look up at Ross, he stares back at me with a kind of intensity that makes me worried.
"Do you want to come back to my house? No one's home."
Butterflies crowd my stomach.
"I have to get going," I say hastily while I stand up.
I quickly place some money on the counter for the bartender. I don't know how much I owe, but I think how much I give is enough.
I try to walk away, but Ross grabs my hand.
"Can I see you again? Tomorrow?"
I debate whether to say yes or no. While I'm thinking, he looks at me with an expression I have never seen before.
"I'll meet you by the meadow tomorrow at midnight," I say swiftly.
I stumble out of the bar, scorning myself.
Why did I say yes?
Deep down, I know why.
It was the first time that I really felt loved, wanted.
I am not going to let him slip away.
A/N- Seven more reviews, and I'll post a new chapter tomorrow. I love you all! Review! 3