A/N: Another one that involves Team Kemp... Evan would like to add that if they didn't screw up missions so often, they wouldn't appear so often here. Idiot.

Anyway, takes place three weeks after Made for Walking (so Team Kemp is back from the mission Tom was training them for) and around the time of Wouldn't Hurt to Tell the Truth, so Sheppard probably doesn't know he's going to have to chew out Evan a little later as well...

Knocked Down

"I've seen hard times and been on my knees
Where I've admitted defeat by my enemies
I've been knocked down and I've been burned by the best

But the fights I've never faced
Are the only mistakes I'll regret."

Kyle Park, "Mistakes I'll Regret"

Well. That's going to be fun. Or not, if you consider the way Team Kemp just materialized in the control room, after several weeks of being completely unaccounted for. Weeks, he would like to add, during which he was starting to question the decision to send them undercover and most of all starting to wonder how long he'd have to live after he had to give a certain General not so fortunate news about his daughter, not to mention having to write more letters to next of kin... And he's pretty sure Sheppard had just about the same thoughts until they were back, so he does understand why he's trying to stare Kemp down like he's doing now.

It's also why he never argued when Sheppard told him that this will be his show today, even though he knows how much Sheppard hates having to chew out junior officers and how foul a mood that it always puts him in. So he's taking a backseat in this, leaning back in his chair next to Sheppard in the briefing room when Kemp enters the room, his undercover disguise soiled with Ferrier's blood and a couple of other things he's not sure he really wants to have floating through Atlantis's air. The Lieutenant performs a textbook report and even manages to look alert, fresh faced and ready to go out on a mission for a moment.

Then the moment is gone and all that's left in Kemp's entire posture is weariness and the weight of the world on his shoulders. Somehow... he starts to sympathize with the Lieutenant but then he remembers the grey hairs Laura found a couple of days ago and teased him mercilessly with and reminds himself that Team Kemp contributed a lot to those grey hairs. That actually makes it easier not to remind Sheppard with one last look to go easy on Kemp.

"So, Lieutenant... how about you tell us what happened in the last three weeks? We're both dying to know what you and your team were up to," Sheppard drawls and it almost sounds like his usual relaxed twang but there's something in it... that he'd call menacing. Or at least something that should alert you to the possibility of shouting further down the line.

Kemp... seems to have heard it, too because he can see a short crack in the Lieutenant's still professional façade. Then he seems to have decided to just ignore it and get this over with as fast as possible. "My team and I were inserted to Genii territory to gather information on the structures inside the Genii society and the threat potential in regard to Atlantis four weeks ago." Yeah, well, so far they know all of that and he can see it brewing beneath Sheppard's rather impassive surface. So far, though, the Colonel seems to have decided to keep quiet and let Kemp try to talk his way out of this. "We were using misinformation that Captain Morgan's team disseminated among the Genii population and their allies in the last undercover rotation as basis for our cover." Yes, they knew that, too.

And Sheppard's patience is starting to wan as well. "Lieutenant. How about you just cut all the beating around the bush crap and tell us how the hell Jason Ferrier ended up in Dr. Keller's OR?"

Did he just imagine it or did Kemp really flinch at the cutting undertone in Sheppard's voice? He certainly would have in Kemp's stead because this really isn't like the Sheppard most of his soldiers know and like – mostly because Sheppard usually leaves the unpleasant tasks to him, at his suggestion and request. Kemp also visibly swallows before going on, "Basically, sir, we undertook a mission for the Genii as part of our cover and it didn't go as planned."

"I'm pretty sure you wanted to say "went to hell in a hand basket", didn't you, Lieutenant?" Sheppard interjects and the Lieutenant swallows again.

This time, there's a moment of silence before Kemp simply says, "Yes, sir."

"What the hell happened, Lieutenant?" For just a moment, Kemp's eyes flicker over to him and he's almost tempted to give the Lieutenant an encouraging nod but there's still the slightly unfavorable detail of Team Kemp practically having been AWOL for almost three weeks and while he's quite aware of the fact that theirs was a deep cover mission that made it nearly impossible for them to contact Atlantis without compromising their cover, he's also aware of the fact that there's another of Sheppard's and his soldiers in the OR and he really hopes for his sake that Kemp has a good explanation for that.

"My team and I infiltrated the Genii settlement and took our respective places in their routine. The intended "discovery" by the Genii forces went as planned and we were accepted in our new roles. While Lieutenant Ferrier, Sergeant Faraday and I did mostly physical work on the surface and scouted the perimeter, Lieutenant Wells helped the Genii to develop their shielding technology while gathering information on their scientific progress in the process." So far... it actually doesn't sound bad. In fact, it sounds pretty much what they'd been hoping for when they sent Team Kemp on their way with a crash course in infiltration and sabotage and good wishes. He's starting to wonder what they did wrong enough that it ended with one of their own wounded.

He's waiting for Kemp to go on but the Lieutenant hesitates, looking at Sheppard again and while he understands Sheppard in his agitation, he also wants Kemp to give them a comprehensive report... so he can see if the Lieutenant screwed up as much as he fears or if he did how they all expected of him. He tries to keep from sighing and simply tells Kemp, "Go on, Lieutenant. So far, we're following."

Sheppard, on the other side of the table looks like he'd like to remind Kemp that what he wants most of him is to get to the point but since it looks like he's going to be the good cop in this game, he simply tries to signal Sheppard to have just a little more patience and let the Lieutenant finish his report.

Kemp seems to have seen it and after a short gesture from Sheppard, he seems to soldier up again and continues, "The nominal settlement's leader was a male Genii going by the name of Roghan but as we found out pretty far, the actual leader was a woman going by the name of Nera. Lieutenant Wells worked closest with her, so she could inform us about everything going on in the Genii compound. It was through her that we learned about Ladon Radim visiting the settlement to inspect the progress on the shield emitter."

Again, he looks at Sheppard and he just gives him a minute shake of his head. Yeah, well. They both know that this is exactly the kind of information they'd usually go after in a normal debriefing and they definitely will have to talk to Kemp's team and Lieutenant Wells especially about this as soon as they can but right now... their priorities are just a bit differently.

Sheppard nods at Kemp to make him continue. "Lieutenant Wells also kept us updated on the progress and according to her expertise, the most pressing issue was energy. We also knew that Nera needed to prove herself to Radim and the rest of the Genii top cadre through her so it shouldn't have... it shouldn't have surprised us that only a few days later, we were pressed... we were pressed to gate away from our target region."

Right. This is probably where it's starting to get ugly, judging by the two times Kemp actually had to force himself to go on. Again, sympathy for the young officer is trying to force itself on him – and so is also the fleeting question what Laura would say to them harassing one of her fellow Lieutenants, Air Force or not – but this is neither the place nor the time for something like that. But it maybe is the time and place to show the Lieutenant that he needs to go on now, no matter how hard it is. Again he exchanges a look with Sheppard and then says, "What happened next, Lieutenant?"

"The Genii apparently operate a network of undercover agents among the Wraith worshipers." That... is not what he'd wanted to hear. Actually, he hadn't wanted to hear anything containing the word "Wraith" and it must have shown on both his and Sheppard's faces because Kemp hesitates before going on again.

Then he seems to have given himself a mental kick in the ass and says, "One of their cells reported the landing of a Hive with an operational ZPM onboard to Nera." Right. He's just this close to put his head on the table in exasperation. Please, he thinks, please do not tell us now that... "Nera force recruited us for a scheme to get that ZPM, sir."

For a moment, no one says a word. Until Sheppard feels compelled to break that silence by saying, "You said you gated away from the target area, right, Lieutenant?"

Kemp nods. "Yes, sir." There's a weird undertone in his voice. As if he knows he's in for an ugly ride now. Well.

"Did they arm you?" The menacing undertone is back in Sheppard's voice.

The Lieutenant seems to have heard it, too. Good for him, he thinks, but it still probably won't save him. "Not at first, sir."

"But they did later? For the heist?" Actually, he'd have called it a retrieval op and Sheppard usually would have, too but right now he's probably way too pissed off about Team Kemp letting themselves be roped into a goddamn ZPM heist. Usually, that's the kind of thing Sheppard's team pulls, and, as Laura would say, it's not even cool when they do it.

There's a nod from Kemp and he wonders if they shouldn't at least offer him a seat. It looks like this might take a little while longer and quite frankly, the Lieutenant starts to look more and more as if he might fall asleep on his feet. "Yes, sir, that's correct. We were armed shortly before the op took off."

Sheppard looks as if he might start the shouting right now and quite frankly he's probably thinking along the same lines but they can still question Kemp why he didn't just get the hell out of that with his team after they got to know how it actually happened. So before Sheppard can even open his mouth, he says, "How exactly did that op go, Lieutenant? Who was in charge? Nera?"

Kemp shakes his head and that's not what he wanted to see. "Actually not, sir. She was the one recruiting us and arming us but... the operational responsibility lay with me." There's a break again and the only think keeping both Sheppard and him from shouting something down the line of "What hell were you thinking, Lieutenant?" is probably the fact that Kemp looks like the weight of that decision, however it was made, is lying heavily enough on him that his shoulders are visibly dropping. "When she explained to us what we were supposed to do, I figured that if we had to do that, we had to do it on our terms and with me in charge."

Actually, that's not a bad decision and one both he and Sheppard would have made... but Kemp is neither he nor Sheppard. And he knows that. "We were provided with clothes marking us as Wraith worshipers. Posing as such, we infiltrated the Hive and managed to advance to where the Wraith were keeping the ZPM. Lieutenant Wells and Sergeant Faraday tried to remove the ZPM while Lieutenant Ferrier, Nera and I were guarding the entrance."

So far, it actually sounds like a cake walk. But it always is, until it isn't. He can see the same gloomy anticipation in Sheppard's face that he's feeling and he's almost ready to give Kemp a break when he continues, his professional façade cracking up again. "We encountered and neutralized minimal Wraith resistance before extracting from the compound with the ZPM." Wow. Actually... that's more than he'd have thought they'd have in them, despite Tom's – and Laura's – assessment of their skills. But there's gotta be a catch somewhere in here or Keller wouldn't be patching up Ferrier right now. "The shi... things went downh... things went not according to the plan when we left the Hive, though." Right now... he strangely finds himself wishing that Kemp would fully lose composure only once instead of still being just so goddamn professional.

But he still doesn't do them the favor. "After we left the Hive, our cover as Wraith worshipers was blown when we encountered a group of actual worshipers. We lost the ZPM when Nera fled after neutralizing one of the worshipers and Lieutenant Ferrier... was hit by a second worshiper. After that, we retreated under fire to the 'Gate where we managed to dial Atlantis." And the rest is history, as they like to say and Kemp mercifully keeps from remarking.

After Kemp is finished with his report, there's another moment of silence when Kemp simply stares at the wall opposite him, this time actually a few minutes long. Then, Sheppard speaks up again, his voice dangerously low, "So, Lieutenant... now that we know the actual facts... why, in the name of everything that is holy, didn't you make for the goddamn Gate in the first place? Why, for the love of fucking God, did you think it was a fucking good idea to take part in that stupid, harebrained stunt that that Genii idiot recruited you for? What the goddamn fucking hell were you thinking and why the hell didn't your team tell you to stick that entire idea where the fucking sun never fucking shines?"

Whoa. That was a tirade that would have certainly inspired some applause from the Marine population of Atlantis and probably a good part of the Air Force contingent, too. It was a classic with Sheppard and his voice raising a little more with every word until Sheppard was standing and shouting. There were some really good questions he'd actually like to have an answer for, too. Kemp, however, takes a moment to swallow whatever had been on the tip of his tongue – probably a retort that would have put Wells to shame – and then replies, "The decision to be part of this op was a team decision and at that time our best option to keep our cover with the Genii intact and build a foundation for further more intensive probing and intelligence gathering. Sir."

There it was. He can't believe it but he could really hear a bit of Wells in the slightly irritated undertone in Kemp's voice, most of all when he added that "sir". And Sheppard heard it, too. "That best option nearly got one of your men killed, for Heaven's sake!"

"I am well aware of that, sir," Kemp grinds out and for the first time since coming back to Atlantis, there's a spark of defiance in his eyes, this time not hidden at all by any layer of professionality or weariness. "But refusing to comply with Nera's orders could have gotten us our cover blown and could have gotten us all killed. We chose the lesser of two evils."

It's amazing how Kemp keeps using we and never actually uses I and he hopes it's not just a way of pushing his team in front of himself to distract from his mistakes. It's why he just has to ask. "You... or you, Lieutenant?"

Again, the spark, now aimed directly at him. "My team and I, sir." Then, probably because his walls have been worn nearly thin, Kemp adds, "Just ask any of my team members, sir. They'll all answer the same way. Positively." Okay, so it's not actually the words that make this either a very brave or a very stupid act... it's more the tone of voice. Weary again, and positively annoyed... sounding like he's fed up with them and their questioning and just wants to slink off to spend the remainder of the day anywhere but here.

For a moment, Sheppard seems to look actually impressed but then he obviously remembered what they cited Kemp here for. "It still landed one of your men in the infirmary, Kemp. So something about that decision was just plain wrong. Again, what were you thinking, all of you?"

"We were thinking, sir, that we didn't want to jeopardize the mission's objectives and most of all we didn't want to jeopardize our cover. Which is still intact, as I might add, sir." That... whoa. Did Kemp take lessons from Wells or something? Because that sure sounded like he's channeling her, big time.

Actually, it was surprising enough – not only the tone, to be honest, but also the fact – that it shuts up both him and Sheppard for a moment. Then, Sheppard says, sounding a little grudgingly, "That doesn't mean you and your team didn't make a lot of mistakes – potentially fatal mistakes, I might add – Lieutenant. I want you to compile a report of your mission, including a complete analysis of everything that went wrong in any way. And everything that went right. Am I clear?"

"Crystal, sir," Kemp says and Sheppard... just nods. Oh. Huh. Sheppard must have been more impressed by Kemp's steadfast refusal to let his superior's doubt in his ability to stick by his decisions get to him, even if they produced a casualty. Otherwise he wouldn't have given in so fast.

Then he expects Sheppard to dismiss the Lieutenant... but the Lieutenant isn't finished, obviously. "If I... I may add something, sir..."

"You may."

"I just would like to have it noted that whatever the outcome was, Lieutenant Wells, Lieutenant Ferrier and Sergeant Faraday all performed their duties diligently, bravely and with initiative. Lieutenant Wells' performance especially was outstanding. She distinguished herself by working countless hours without ever complaining or requesting to be pulled out. Without her, we wouldn't have come nearly as far as we did." Yes... yes, he noticed that Kemp mentioned her a couple of times before, and always in the most favorable way possible. He wonders what exactly happened on that mission. "If this is going to reflect on anyone's service records... please don't involve my team. Anything that will be of official consequences should be of consequence only for me."

Now, that is bordering on being a martyr just a little too much for his taste... but he knows well enough how it feels to have a soldier in the infirmary that got injured under your command, on your watch... because of your orders. The image of Laura on that stretcher after being nearly blown up because he was too stupid to notice a goddamn booby trap is still very much present in his mind so he throws Sheppard a short look to let him handle this and then he tells Kemp, "No official consequences, Lieutenant. We just want to know what happened so it won't happen again."

The Lieutenant just nods, obviously swallowing. "Yes, sir. When are we supposed to report for the debriefing?"

Yeah, good question. "Your team and you will be on downtime for at least eight hours. Expect to be notified of the exact time no earlier than that." Ah, he knew Sheppard wouldn't be able to keep up the pissed off act much longer and that his softer side would show through at some point. Not that his tone was any softer than before but from the look of it, Kemp realized very well that he was just let off the hook. "After the debriefing you'll be on stand down until further notice." Read: as long as Ferrier isn't back on par and he hopes Kemp reads it like that as well, not like the reprimand it just sounded like. "As for you, Lieutenant... get a shower, grab something to eat and for Heaven's sake, go get some sleep." He definitely needs it, that much is clear.

However, Kemp doesn't agree, apparently. "Sir, I have a soldier in the infirmary..."

"Dr. Keller will notify you of any changes as per usual." Well, that was clear. And as expected, it draws a not really happy reaction from Kemp. "Now, shower, eat, sleep. And that's an order, Lieutenant." Yeah, doesn't he know that one just as well? Which is why he's pretty sure Kemp might intend to go looking for one and two but there's no way in hell he'll even think about attempting three.

Even though he actually says, "Yes, sir."

Probably knowing full well Kemp didn't mean a thing about that, Sheppard gives him another glare and throws him out with the words, "Dismissed, Lieutenant. Get out before we decide to put something in your file after all." That seems to have appealed to Kemp's sense of self-preservation since he practically hightails it out of the briefing room, hopefully to at least change out of those disgusting worshiper rags, if not to sleep off the exhaustion that had been practically radiating off him towards the end.

After he's gone, there's a moment of silence and then... Sheppard is snorting and he can't help snorting as well, even though he knows this isn't funny in the least. Thankfully, both Sheppard and he can't get past that short sound of amusement before he manages to ask wholly straight faced, "You wouldn't seriously put any of this in his service record, would you?"

It makes Sheppard role his eyes. What? He had to make sure, didn't he? After all, he's the one having to actually put all that stuff in there. "Not in a million years, Major. How much of an asshole do you think I am?"

He shrugs and answers truthfully, "Not all, sir. You just sounded pretty... convincing is all."

That makes Sheppard make a face and growl a little. "Yeah, sometimes you gotta give those strapping young Lieutenants a shot across the bow to keep them in line. You honestly don't want to see whatever mayhem they could wreck if let loose, do you?"

Good God, no. "No, sir. Definitely not."

"Thought so," Sheppard simply says nodding and then adds, "Now, if you want to do Kemp a favor... see that he actually heeds my order."

Damn. How to tell Sheppard that he most certainly will not do that... oh, right. "I'll see what I can do, sir."

For a moment, Sheppard regards him with a mildly curious gaze, as if he's wondering if that was a yes or a no... and then he leaves it at, "I'm sure you will. And by the way... do give some thought to a possible commendation for Kemp and his team... especially the one for Lieutenant Wells."

Alright. That probably was his punishment in advance. He's pretty sure Sheppard knows he has no intention whatsoever to enforce his order on Kemp and apparently, it's not only the Lieutenants Sheppard likes to give a shot across the bow now and then. But it's not like he's afraid of either Lieutenant or General Wells, and anyway he actually likes writing commendations. He just nods. "Will do, sir."

Sheppard just makes a shooing gesture and after he left the briefing room he actually allows himself a roll of his eyes. Briefly, he wonders if he should actually seek out Lieutenant Kemp but then decides he really needs to get some other paper work done before Laura gets back from her mission in two days. It's potentially boring and she always gets a little pissed off when he has paper work to finish when he should be entertaining her after a babysitter mission. And he really hates not being able to entertain... oh. Lieutenant Kemp. On his way straight to the infirmary. Of course.

And unfortunately, the Lieutenant spotted him before he could duck in another hallway. Now he has to remind him of Sheppard's order. God.

Trying not to roll his eyes, he walks up to the Lieutenant who at least has the decency to blush. "Lieutenant Kemp... let me make this short. If you have to violate Colonel Sheppard's order, at least take care that he doesn't catch you. And he will if you charge directly at the infirmary." Yeah, Lieutenant, not one of your most brilliant plans, was it? "Go and have that shower and grab something to eat on your way back from your quarters. Also, try the south entrance. Less easy to observe." And then... it registers what he just said, mostly because of the faint grin tugging at the corners of Kemp's mouth. "That was not an invitation to openly disregard a direct order from a superior officer, Lieutenant."

"So," Kemp says, pausing probably just for the dramatic effect, "if Colonel Sheppard catches me, I tell him that it was not Major Lorne who sent me through the south entrance?"

Goddammit! Sheppard was right with his assessment of their strapping young Lieutenants. Shot across the bow. Yeah. He growls, "Watch it, Lieutenant."

"Yes, sir," Kemp only replies, looking not really impressed, and then continues, "If you'd excuse me now, sir, I need to take a shower. I was ordered to get one, actually."

"Beat it, Kemp," is all he needs to reply to the Lieutenant's last almost transgression to make him beat a hasty retreat. It is kind of satisfying that he can still inspire that in his soldiers, even though he actually played good cop today, instead of the usual bad cop. Now he just hopes that Ferrier's surgery will go well because he just doesn't want to use another young promising soldier and most of all because he doesn't want Kemp to lose a soldier under his command like that... or at all.

And yeah... he also hopes no one will tell Laura about this when she comes back in two days because he wouldn't put it past her to make him sleep on his couch in his quarters... oh good God, why didn't he think about that before? He's doomed. Doomed. Crap. But maybe... if he finds a way to convince Team Kemp to keep this quiet... oh, yeah, maybe that could work...