Note: I finish all University assignments on the 31st May! Until then updates will probably be non-existent, but after that I shall acquire a very strange and new phenomenon which I believe is commonly referred to as 'Free Time'. I believe the traditional thing to do with such a thing is to...well...use it...
Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter.
3: The Meeting of Four Boys
They had all happened in such a rush, those short few hours since his mother had awoken him by throwing back the curtains and letting the early morning sunlight stream through his bedroom window.
That was how things went when you were excited, eleven year old Remus Lupin supposed as he gazed out of the window at the frantically waving figures of his parents upon the station platform that were growing steadily smaller and smaller as the Hogwarts Express picked up speed.
It was true. Remus had been excited about going to school when he had woken up that morning. He had been excited ever since the previous afternoon when Madam Pomfrey and Professor Dumbledore had come to discuss in detail their special arrangements for his time at Hogwarts. At first the discussions had made him uneasy, but the Headmaster had spoken so calmly about the whole situation, as if they were merely arranging a monthly tea party to be held in the school grounds, that by the time his mother had seen their guests to the front door Remus had felt entirely relaxed about it all.
Now however, away from his parents and on a train hurtling him off into the unknown, Professor Dumbledore's calm explanations seemed a distant memory and going to Hogwarts seemed like some sort of dreadful nightmare...
It wasn't exciting in the slightest! It was...it was simply...it was just...!
Remus slumped forward until his forehead came to press against the glass of the window and he screwed his eyes shut, sucking in a deep, panicked breath...
He was going to be sick. He was sure of it.
The boy sucked in another deep breath and held it, wincing a little as the rattling window juddered against his forehead, making his head throb.
This was an awful idea. It was all an awful idea. He wasn't supposed to go to to Hogwarts. People like him didn't go to Hogwarts. They just didn't. What if somebody found out the truth about him? What then? What would happen to him? And how would he cope? How would he cope every month without his mother to look after him? He didn't want anybody else, he didn't want to be surrounded by strangers, strange adults to look after him, strange children to make friends with...he didn't make friends. He didn't know how. He didn't mix with children his own age. He didn't mix with anyone much at all. And Hogwarts would be swarming with people, so many people! All watching, all just waiting for him to...
"Are you alright?" a voice inquired from behind him, and at the noise Remus immediately jumped, cracking his head against the glass. Reaching to clamp a hand over his forehead the young werewolf stumbled round to see the speaker, and as the corridor seemed to swim alarmingly around him Remus tried to focus upon the boy stood in front of him. The speaker was a good half head shorter than Remus was and rather on the podgy side. He was gazing rather worriedly at Remus through a mop of mousy coloured hair with pale, watery blue eyes and as Remus tried to blink him into focus the podgy boy informed him:
"You look a bit...grey..."
"I...I want to get off the train..." Remus found himself confessing quite wildly, too panicked to care what he looked like or how childish it made him sound. "I...I don't...I'm not supposed to...to be here..."
"Don't you have a ticket?" asked the boy, frowning deeply. "What're you going to do when we get there and they realise..."
"No, that's not...I don't mean that it's just..."
"Are you scared of trains?"
"No..."
"Then you must be nervous about going to Hogwarts. I shouldn't worry, so am I! I couldn't eat a bite of breakfast, even though my Mum says we're all the same! Everybody gets nervous, that's what my Mum says!"
Remus wanted to snap at the cheery tone of the boy's voice to tell him that he wasn't the same as any of the other children in the slightest. But instead he slumped back against the window again and screwed his eyes shut. He tried to concentrate on his breathing.
"My name's Peter." the other boy informed him, still irritatingly cheery. "Peter Pettigrew. What's your name?"
Remus couldn't remember.
"I think I'm going to be sick..." he moaned as his stomach twisted into ever worsening knots.
"Oh..." Peter Pettigrew said rather unhelpfully.
Remus was beginning to wish he would go away.
He wished he could go away himself. He wished he could go back home, forget all about Hogwarts. He should have begged his mother to home school him, he should have gotten on his hands and knees and...
He barely registered falling to his knees and to find himself so close to the ground half a second later was something of a shock as he finally lost the battle with his twisting insides and vomited at Peter's feet. And as he registered Peter's vague exclamation of disgust as the podgy boy leapt backwards, colliding painfully with the compartment door behind him, Remus found the world abruptly slanted and his head met the carriage floor as the world seemed to flicker away into darkness.
When he resurfaced an indeterminate length of time later, Remus found himself lying across the seating in one of the carriage compartments, the English countryside streaking past outside of the window as he blinked groggily around at his surroundings. The rustling of a chocolate wrapped caught his attention and he shifted to find Peter Pettigrew sat opposite him, an impressive mound of sweets and confectionaries piled upon the seat beside him. The podgy young wizard took a sizeable bite out of a chocolate bar, before observing:
"You're awake!"
Remus reached stiffly to push himself up into a sitting position, his head aching dully as Peter snatched up a handful of sweets, reaching to thrust them under the young werewolf's nose.
"D'you want some?" the other boy asked cheerfully, and at the sugary scent of liquorice assaulting his nostrils Remus leant back until he was pressed firmly against the back of his seat, mumbling:
"N...no thank you..."
"Well she left a load of this for you, you know!" Peter informed him, gesturing to the mound of sweets as he dumped the handful back atop the rest.
"Sorry?"
"The trolley lady. I went to fetch her, you see. She helped me drag you in here, cleaned all the puke off the floor out there and then left you a load of free sweets!" Peter grinned broadly, taking another generous bite from his chocolate bar, exclaiming: "Pretty cool huh?!"
Remus eyed the sweets, feeling rather dazed. Quite frankly he could think of nothing more awful than stuffing himself with sugar having just vomited all over the floor and passed out.
But Peter Pettigrew didn't seem to be the sort of boy who could comprehend a time when it would not be cool to be given free sweets. No indeed, Peter Pettigrew was too busy stuffing himself senseless to understand such a notion at all.
Remus liked sweets. He liked sweets a lot, especially chocolate which he would eat every day if given half the chance. But even he had his limits!
Unlike Peter, it seemed, and so Remus consented to mumbling:
"Yes...it's pretty cool."
Peter grinned widely, only for the expression to fade a little, his cheeks growing pink as he asked:
"You don't...don't mind, do you? Sharing them, I mean?"
"Oh...no, not at all..."
"Great! That's what friends do anyway, right?"
At the mention of having potentially made a friend without any conceivable effort, Remus felt his spirits rise a little, even though the whole notion seemed rather stupid, basing a friendship on...well...free chocolate...
For Merlin's sake, the boy didn't even know Remus' name yet!
But again, Remus didn't want to try and point this out, so he simply agreed:
"Right."
Peter positively beamed at him, fidgeting to get more comfortable in his seat as he admitted:
"I'm glad I've got a friend already...you know...because it's sort of scary isn't it? Not knowing anyone I mean! I'm dead nervous about being sorted, aren't you? All those people watching...!"
"I haven't really thought about it." Remus admitted, frowning a little at this realisation. It was all most people talked about when they were accepted to Hogwarts: which house would they be sorted into? But Remus hadn't really thought that far ahead. He'd only gotten as far as being excited that he had the opportunity to board the Hogwarts Express in the first place.
"What house do you think you'll be in?" Peter asked him, and recalling his uncontrollable panic earlier Remus found himself laughing in embarrassment as he suggested:
"Not Gryffindor, that's for sure!"
Peter sniggered, and Remus rather wished that he hadn't admitted to being such a coward out loud, so he mused:
"Maybe I'll be a Ravenclaw. Like both of my parents."
"You must be awfully clever, then." Peter told him, sounding rather awed. "I'm not smart enough for Ravenclaw, that's what my dad said! I think...I think I'd like to be in Hufflepuff. Is that silly? Everybody thinks that's silly..."
"I don't think there's anything silly about Hufflepuff." Remus said as he turned to gaze out of the window. "It's important, isn't it? All that hard work and...and loyalty. Especially loyalty."
"Exactly! I'd like that, you know? I'd like people to think I'm loyal."
"Yes, so would I."
"You're not a Slytherin, then?" Peter asked with a snigger. "You don't think you're terribly cunning?"
Remus supposed that if he was going to survive his time at Hogwarts with his secrets still in tact he might have to quickly learn to be very cunning indeed...
"I don't really fancy sleeping in the dungeons." he confessed as Peter reached to pick up another bar of chocolate. Watching the podgy boy rip open the shiny foil wrapper, Remus wondered: "How long was I...you know...? How long has it been since we left London?"
Peter's eyes widened excitedly as he slipped from his seat onto his feet.
"We should get changed into our robes!" he announced, abandoning the chocolate bar back upon the mound of sweets.
"I've been out of it for...for hours?!" Remus concluded, sounding horrified, but Peter merely sniggered.
"No, you we're out of it for about five minutes!"
Remus slumped back against his seat again in relief.
Or was it relief? He was going to be stuck on this train for hours, that was plenty of time to panic all over again.
Merlin, he wanted to go home...
"I'm just excited, that's all!" Peter said as he half-skipped over to his trunk, throwing back the lid so that he could fetch his school uniform. "Just think of that welcome feast! There's going to be so much food!"
Remus was certain he wouldn't eat a bite of it.
Perhaps he could owl his mother once he arrived at the castle. Tell her they had made an awful mistake. Tell her to send for him to come home immediately...
"Where's your trunk?" Peter asked, oblivious to Remus' lack of enthusiasm as he pulled a grey school jumper from his own trunk with unfathomable gusto.
"Oh..." Remus glanced searchingly around the carriage as if the trunk in question might simply materialise from thin air. When he didn't, he was forced to recall: "It's in a different compartment..."
"Shall we go and fetch it, then?" Peter suggested, and Remus very nearly sighed at the thought of getting up and moving around when his head was aching so dreadfully.
But he supposed his head wouldn't feel better any time soon, and now was as good a time as any to go and find his belongings. Who knew, maybe he'd feel slightly less foolish if he put on his school uniform. Maybe he might feel as if he would fit in...
As he rose slowly to his feet Peter half-bounded over towards the compartment door, tossing his jumper down upon his vacated seat and grabbing a handful of sweets for good measure. The podgy boy reached to slide the door open, glanced almost nervously out into the corridor, before suggesting:
"After you!"
Remus slipped out into the corridor and, after glancing one way and then the other to gather his bearings, set off, glancing through the little windows into each compartment as he went, Peter wandering along after him, popping an Every Flavour Bean into his mouth.
The compartment in which Remus and a helpful fourth year Hufflepuff had deposited Remus' hefty school trunk had, the werewolf saw, since then been occupied by a rowdy group of students who were talking and laughing so loudly that they didn't seem to notice Remus wandering in to retrieve the trunk, and as he reached to grasp hod of the handle on one end of the trunk, giving it a firm yank away from the wall with little success, Remus frowned a little at the noise, only for it to suddenly fizzle out and a sniggering boy's voice inquired:
"Got enough sweets there, Fatty?"
Remus turned to see Peter stood in the compartment doorway, bar of chocolate midway to his mouth as he froze, his cheeks growing pink in embarrassment.
The speaker, Remus saw, was a handsome boy with a head of shaggy black hair sat with his feet up across one seat, and opposite him a boy with messy dark hair and glasses had promptly dissolved into laughter, much to Peter's horror...
Remus waited for Peter to say something, but he simply opened and closed his mouth a few times, which only seemed to make the boy with glasses laugh harder than ever.
Abandoning his failed attempts to shift the trunk, Remus straightened up, shoving his hands deep into his pockets as he observed:
"Well he's got more than you do, that's for certain." As the first boy turned to look round at him, the werewolf found himself suggesting: "Perhaps you're jealous?"
The boy with glasses instantly stopped laughing and looked round too, and Peter's eyes widened.
The compartment went silent.
Remus rather felt like sighing as the first boy slid his feet down from the seat and rose to his feet. Remus had rather planned on keeping himself to himself. As he watched the boy take a few steps towards him, causing Peter to shrink back a little in the doorway, the boy supposed that notion had died a disappointingly swift death...
The black haired, broad shouldered boy came to a stop in front of him, took a moment to look him up and down, before offering him a raised eyebrow.
"I reckon you're jealous yourself!" he said as the boy with glasses eyed Remus curiously. "When's the last time you ate a bar of chocolate? Look at you!" He reached forward to jab a finger at the skinny boy's ribs and the werewolf attempted to suppress a wince.
Over in the doorway, Peter let out an odd little squeak.
Remus stared at the boy for a long moment in consideration before slowly making a show of looking down at himself, turning his hands over scrutinisingly before holding the up and concluding:
"No, you're right. I probably am jealous. Look at me! There doesn't appear to be a single square of chocolate in my hands at all..."
At his sarcasm, the boy in glasses promptly dissolved into laughter again and, after a rather surprised pause, the black boy followed suit, his barking laugh making Peter jump.
"What's your name?" asked the second boy, reaching to push his glasses further up his nose, and Remus found himself letting out a breath he hadn't realised he had been holding.
"Remus...Remus Lupin." he supplied, and he promptly jumped a little when the boy in front of him reached to grasp him by the hand, shaking it so hard that he feared he might dislocate his wrist.
"I'm Sirius. Sirius Black. And this is James."
"James Potter." James clarified, grinning widely, before turning back to the door to inquire: "And who are you?"
Peter looked somewhat stunned to be asked. When he didn't say anything for a long moment, Sirius let out a huff, turning round to tell the boy:
"I was only kidding, Fatty! What's your name, then? 'Else we'll have to stick with Fatty and Remus doesn't seem to approve..."
Peter let out a rather nervous little laugh.
"Peter Pettigrew." he half-whispered, and over by the window James was forced to ask:
"What?"
"He's Peter Pettigrew." Remus explained, turning his attention back to his trunk, only for Sirius to wonder:
"Yeah? Friends, are you?"
"Yes, we are!" Peter agreed, suddenly finding his voice, and Remus found himself feeling the sudden urge to laugh. "We're very good friends! In fact...in fact these aren't my sweets, they're Remus', he...he's sharing with me!"
"How long have you known him?" Sirius asked Remus in an undertone as if he were slightly shocked, and as Remus stooped to grab his trunk, he estimated:
"About...fifteen minutes...or less..."
Sirius grinned.
"Want a hand with that?" he asked as Remus strained to pull the trunk towards the door. "James, come and give us a hand!"
As they set about heaving the trunk out into the corridor with James' help, Peter watching on, James wondered:
"What've you got in here, it weighs a ton!"
"Is it bricks?" Sirius wondered with a wince as he caught his toe in the doorway.
"No...books."
"Merlin," Sirius grunted. "That's even worse..."
"Hold the door, Peter." James said, wincing as the door began to slide back on them, and as he hurried to grab it, Peter suggested:
"We've got more sweets in our compartment, you know. If you want some."
"More?" James laughed. "Merlin!"
"Did you buy the entire trolley, Remus?" Sirius wondered, and Remus was about to laugh when Peter piped up:
"No, Remus fainted in the corridor! So the Trolley Witch gave him a load of free sweets! You know, 'cos he wasn't well! How cool is that?!"
Remus felt his face growing hot in humiliation as they finally stumbled out into the corridor. The werewolf ducked his head, not wanting to even look at the other boys' faces to see the sniggers that would probably materialise in an instant.
"Merlin..." Sirius began, only for James to ask:
"Which way, Remus?"
Remus was hoping the answer might be downwards, that a hole might open up beneath him and swallow him up...
"It's...it's alright," he said, forcing himself to look up and smile. "I um...I've got it from here...so...thanks for helping!"
"Don't be stupid!" James said. "Which way?"
"Yeah," Sirius agreed with a grin. "I'm not going to miss free sweets..."
Remus managed a vague chuckle as Peter announced:
"This way! Down the end here!"
As they struggled on down the corridor, Sirius beginning to babble to James about some apparently pathetic Gryffindor-hating individual who needed to wash his hair, Remus found himself longing to curl up in a corner of his compartment with a book to disappear behind...
...and yet when they finally dragged the trunk over the threshold into the compartment and Sirius and James made a beeline for the mound of sweets upon the chair, Remus found himself feeling far more inclined to abandon his books and join in with the sudden squabbling over Ever Flavour Beans and chocolate frog cards instead.
Indeed, for a while the young werewolf felt as if going to Hogwarts was a perfectly good idea, as if he were an entirely normal young wizard.
And yet all too soon Remus Lupin was about to discover that he was not normal at all.
Even for a werewolf...