Author's Note: Hey guys! It's been a couple days since my last update. Sorry about that. I've been kinda busy lately. This chapter is through Castiel's eyes (of course) and we get to see a little bit of Dean's past. Most of the chapter is centered on just the two of them. Anyways, I hope you like it and remember to review. You guys are the best.

True Rayanne Adaire

Chapter Five

Castiel

The next few days were simple. Dean and I spent most of our days with Gabriel and Lucifer or Ash and Jo. Our nights, which usually started at around 10:30 when we retreated to our own bedroom, usually consisted of music and talking and once in a while cuddling. Things were going pretty good overall. Dean's confidence levels were still low and he had the annoying habit of telling me that I could find better than him, (He was being ridiculous by the way) but he'd stopped pushing me away. Our routine consisted like this for two weeks. On Friday, my second week of living there, Ellen and Bobby took the other boys – and Jo – to a festival in town. They offered to take us but Dean and I chose to stay behind. Dean because he said he wanted to work on his models a little more and me because I didn't really feel like spending the day around people. Really, and I think Bobby at least knew it, we just wanted to spend time together. Alone. They left at 8 in the morning, leaving Dean and I with the house to ourselves. Dean went to his brother's bedroom and retrieved an old laptop. Grinning, he set it down and pulled out a stack of DVD's and told me to join him on his bed. He'd put his model car away and was holding back the blankets so that I could climb in next to him. Smiling a little, I did as I was asked. He slipped the first DVD in and pulled me against his chest. It was an older version of Batman and I had to laugh.

"What's so funny?" he asked and I laughed again.

"It's just predictable. I should have figured that you'd want to watch Batman first."

He sighed. "You've been talking to Sam, haven't you?"

"Yeah. He told me all about your obsession with Batman."

"Well, I'll have you know that he's obsessed with Superman. Has been since he was like three."

"He told me that too."

"Oh hush and watch the movie."

"What if I don't want to? What if I'd rather kiss you?"

"Then do it."

Twisting in his arms, I pressed our lips together and kissed him deeply. For a moment, he was shocked before he responded to my kiss with a kiss of his own. His kiss sent a ball of warmth radiating through my heart and into my stomach. It was like…fireworks going off inside of me and I had to break the kiss to smile. I'd honestly never felt like that before and, even though it was strange and unfamiliar, I loved it. I loved the feeling I got when doing something as simple as resting my forehead against his to stare into his eyes.

"You're amazing." I whispered, kissing his forehead softly.

"I'm not. But you are."

"Trust me Dean…you're amazing."

His green eyes darkened a little and he slid them from my own. "I'm not amazing. Cas…I'm broken and ruined. Not amazing."

"You're not broken and you're definitely not ruined."

He looked away again, sighing. "Cas…there is no one on this earth that's more broken than I am."

"Why do you think these things? They're so wrong it isn't even funny…"

He rested his head on my shoulder before speaking, his voice low. "It's not really me I guess…more like my dad's voice in my head telling me shit since he ain't around to say it anymore. Dad and Alastair that is."

"I've heard about your Dad from Sam. He's wrong Dean. You are nothing like what he told you. You raised Sam almost completely on your own. That takes a good person. You know…Sam says you're still the only person he really listens to. Gabriel and Lucifer like you. They hardly like anyone. Literally. They're more antisocial than I am. Ash loves you and that's even more surprising since he's an antisocial genius with very few real friends. And I…I love you. It may be too soon to say it but I do and I don't care."

Dean didn't speak, he kept his head on my shoulder.

"Who's Alastair? You've never mentioned him."

At this, he looked up at me. His normally bright green eyes were clouded with pain and he had to blink back tears before responding. "Are you sure you want to know?"

"Of course I'm sure."

He sighed. "Alastair is this guy I went to school with. He…uh…he was a bully. I was always on his bad side but he…he ended up kidnapping me. Six months before I came here, he kidnapped me. Kept me in the basement of his house. His parents were drunks…and they were never home so he didn't have to worry about getting caught. The scars on my back? He did those with a metal tipped whip. He'd whip me until I was bleeding and then he'd sit there and talk to me for hours on end. I escaped after six months and he…he shot himself before the police got there. He…he broke me Cas. You don't want someone that's been through that…"

I pulled him closer, resting my chin atop his head. "I do want you. I told you…I told you I loved you and I do. What he did to you was not your fault. You didn't ask for it. If I'm pissed at anyone it's him for doing that to you."

"I love you too. You deserve better but…but I love you and I don't want you to leave."

The words were little more than a whisper and I found myself pulling back to look at him. Kissing him again I whispered, "I'm never leaving you. Not now. Not ever. I promise."

He nodded, searching my face before he pulled me down to lay on top of him. I rested my head against his chest and listened to his heartbeat as he fell asleep again. The movie lay, unwatched, at the foot of the bed. We were still laying like that when Lucifer burst through the doors, shouting.

"GABRIEL IS IN THE HOSPITAL. SOMEONE…SOMEONE SHOT AT SAM AND GABRIEL JUMPED IN THE WAY AND…GET YOUR ASSES DOWNSTAIRS. NOW!"