Chapter 3

I had to admit that I was a little excited when I sat down to find prospects the following day. I began by writing a list all of my accomplishments. I wrote down the secret ones such as the serum and blood varieties. There were a few things I'd done for the government when I was a child. I'd been instructed to forget about not only what I had done but how and who for.

"No big deal." I said aloud.

An hour later I was sighing in defeat as I erased the last remaining thing of importance from my list. More than half of my creations had been sold in full for profit, so I had lost any rights. The rest were super-secret or had been accredited medical research journal articles published under Doctor Wexler's name. Anything that didn't fall under those categories was illegal; the ultraviolet grenades, solar transponders, sonic reactors, and a genetic adapter to name a few.

I ripped up the paper, giving up on that avenue. I might have been given independence when growing up but I never cared to take it. Doctor Wexler worked closely with me in the lab at home. I wrote down what I needed and it appeared. Between Genie's job at the teaching hospital and my father's money and connections, I never went without something I needed to complete my work. Actually, I didn't even know where half that stuff had come from.

"My God!"

I was truly sad. I didn't have my inventions to back me and I had certifications. What was I supposed to do? In the end I went with bold- faced lies. I created several impeccable résumés that matched open positions in the companies I chose. They were beyond impressive! By the time I was finished applying to all the jobs I'd almost had myself believing that I had attended the prestigious Deerfield Academy since elementary school, and that I'd graduated from Harvard, and then Yale.

My current position was genetic researcher, at Aberdeen Pharmaceuticals. That last part was probably the only truth to be found there. Once upon a time, I had owned it. It was just a small portion of a larger medical conglomerate. Since I'd been banished, I had no idea what had become of it…but I hoped…

This would at least get me an interview. From there all I had to do was manipulate the person interviewing me, and then whoever ran the background checks. If I'd had FIN he could've just hijacked the systems of the schools and establishments in question, and then I would be in. I knew using either method was morally reprehensible. I could perform whatever task they threw my way with my hands tied behind my back, so my conscience was appeased.

The first call back I received was from the University Of Florida. I had to turn it down. They hadn't been willing to allow me to split residency. I might be able to relocate if I wanted, which I didn't and Eric couldn't. He was a vampire; a renowned and powerful one to boot. The vampires in that state would not welcome him.

The situation I encountered in Florida was the same story for the next four. We never even got to the interview phase. My hope was dwindling with every phone call and email negotiation that went nowhere. Eric was trying to hide that he was happy but he was failing miserably.

"I am sorry that you are unhappy," He said two weeks later.

"You're not sorry that I can't get the job I want."

I gave him an expression that told him to tread softly. It would have stilled lesser men but not him. Knowing it would piss me off never kept Eric from telling me the truth.

"I always want you to have what you want," He said. "But the thought of you leaving home for half the month, in another state, for work is unappealing. As a male my age, the thought of my wife working outside the home doesn't appeal to me in general."

Archaic didn't seem like a strong enough word for that. "Yes, because I'm sure back in the Stone Age when you were human, I would be barefoot and pregnant."

He narrowed his eyes at me menacingly. "So?"

"So, a male your age should be able to see beyond such outdated views. Having a child isn't possible for us so that doesn't even apply."

Shrugs. "We could adopt. You were adopted. A child would be good for us."

I pulled in a mouth full of air. Eric had ways of looking at things that could take the most complicated part and make it look so simple. It drove me nuts. I was really trying not to fight with him but I couldn't hide the bite to my words.

"We need money for that!" I asserted. Oh shit, when did that even become a subject? Just by the fucking way…

"People have children on less."

"Okay then. The serum for starters!" I exploded.

That was it. I'd lost the argument and any hope of getting him to listen to anything I had to say. He wouldn't engage me if I started yelling. We had done too much of that in the beginning of our relationship. He would leave and I didn't want that.

This method was effective in keeping us from fighting but sometimes it pissed me the hell off when all I wanted to do was yell! I wanted to yell and fight, and then have him agree. I knew it was wrong to want to engage in such a useless war of words, but it would distract me from feeling as if I was the failure that I was starting to see. What made it worse was the fact that it wasn't a familiar emotion. I never failed at anything, ever.

"Making a single dose costs fifteen thousand dollars." I said. My calm was strained because nothing and no one could get to me like Eric.

"The serum isn't important to me. I don't need it," He said.

"That is such bullshit!" I shouted. "Of course you do. It…"

"It was a gift," He said as he laced his boots. "It showed me the sun and the clear blue skies of day after a thousand years of night. It was more than enough to get me through the rest of forever."

He grabbed his keys and walked out the door. I was left staring after him feeling like not only a shitty person but a bitchy wife. I hated when Eric and I fought. It was worse when I was 100 % wrong, and right now I was. Eric might want to provide me with the world if I desired, but I wanted to bend the world to his will, if only to make him smile. I could deal with the guilt if I could do something. I just felt as though I had to do something. I had to provide him with the serum. I had to give him back all I'd taken. I had to.

Eric had told me something that he didn't want to and I had reacted exactly like he'd feared, maybe worse. If I was him I wouldn't have told me about the financial situation. It was more than the fact that he knew I would feel guilty. If not for my stupid faery confession, he may never have said anything. Stupid faeries! Faeries always have to ruin everything! Okay, it had nothing to do with faeries, but they were a convenient scapegoat for my fault in the fight I'd just had with my husband.

It was another slow Wednesday night at Merlotte's but at least it didn't drag by. Arlene had been late and Jessica had called out because her son was sick. For an hour I was handling three section on my own. It wasn't enough to get my mind off Eric and the fight we had. I hated fighting with him. It seemed to through my whole world off its axis. Eric held me tethered to this world not gravity. He kept me centered. Though it was closer, staying in the farmhouse didn't even cross my mind after my shift. Bon Temps didn't feel like home. There was no witchy best friend masquerading as a cat. No, there was nothing on that stretch of farm land for me. When I got home I was looking forward to seeing Eric. He wasn't in the upstairs bedroom. It was then that I remembered that he was mad at me. Worse yet, I deserved his ire. To make matters worse I'd come in after sunrise smelling of shifter and booze. I was just trying to get buried under the dog house it seemed.

I showered quickly and dressed in satin slip. Sex might get me in his good graces but it wouldn't get me off his shit list. To be honest that wasn't what I wanted. I wanted to tell him I was being a bitch. I wanted to tell that I was sorry. If he fucked my brains out then it would be the cherry on top.

We were mated in the vampire way. He might feel it more deeply than I but it didn't change anything. He was my other half. I'd lived without him before and I can say that death might have been easier or less painful. This was the first time we'd fought in years.

I found my way into the day chamber in the corner basement of the house. I crawled into the soft bed that took up half the room. So far, Eric had shown no signs of being awake but I knew he was. He wouldn't fall asleep without me in the house. I rested my face in the middle of his sculpted shoulder blades. I placed a light kiss on his bare skin.

"Are you awake?" I asked.

He lost the tense set to his shoulders as he replied, "No."

I bit back a smile as joy coursed through me, at least he was talking to me. There was nothing as the silent treatment from a vampire. I wasn't that deep in the dog house.

"I'm sorry," I said, burrowing closer to him. "I was being a bitch."

He didn't speak but he did turn to face me, wrapping his arms around me. "Yes, you were." He agreed with a smile.

I kissed his chin, then the corner of his lips, and finally my mouth covered his. I knew I was forgiven. We didn't say anything though. We just held each other. I'd lost my job but in his arms that meant nothing. In fact, nothing mattered when I was here, nothing at all.

"I think you are under stimulated," He said.

I rolled on top of him with a coy smile. "Are you offering to help?"

A smile was pulling at the corners of his lips, though he was still fighting it. I couldn't help but lean in for a kiss. He was my addiction; just that small taste and I was aching for more. My fingers trailed the side of his neck and down his chest, sending chills through him.

"Sookie, wait," he groaned.

That was what his lips said, but his cock was rock hard under me and his hands were clasped on my hips keeping me where I rolled my hips against him. All I had on was the satin nightgown, no panties, and he slept naked. I could feel the tip of seeking my wetness. He was like steel wrapped in silk between my thighs. I ground against him, sucking the lobe of his ear into my mouth.

"We need to…" his words cut off with a shudder.

"Fuck," I offered.

"Absolutely," he growled.

I knew by the way he didn't pull the slight dress off over my head that he was going to be rough. He slipped the flimsy straps down and exposed my breasts. He sat up sucking the hardened buds and kissing me alternatively. There was something about the way this ancient vampire touched me that made me melt from the inside out. Seconds later, I was face down, my back arched, and my sex exposed.

I knew a time would come when I didn't feel like a half-lit stick of dynamite ready to blow. That time wasn't now. I felt him at my entrance, and then he was thrusting into me. That was all it took. My body trembled as I climaxed, my muscles clamped down tighter to keep him right where he was. His fangs sank into my neck. He came while he drank from me but it was fuel. He didn't give me a break. It took about ten minutes for him to exhaust the human part of me.

"Baby…you're going to hurt me," I begged.

"No, you won't let me," he said not letting up.

He used more force and I knew he wanted me to reciprocate in kind. It took him biting me again until it was out of my control. I flipped us and straddled him. He was looking at me in anticipation but all I wanted was to sink my fangs into his neck while I rode his cock. That was exactly what I did. His arms wrapped around me, his fingers knotted in my hair, and he let me get all I needed. An hour later he was lying beside me looking much worse for wear. I'd made a mess of him.

Instead of neat puncture wounds, he had little tears and blood had stained us. Usually when I took his blood he made the punctures and fed it to me. I'd been thought to feed off the hoof and to make clean bites. I was just out of practice and extremely out of control. It took every ounce of will I had not to lick the dried streaks of blood off him.

Eric smiled and tossed his hair back, knowing just how enticing he was. "I know you want to taste me again."

It was as if he could read my mind. To make matters worse, his voice sounded like warm chocolate and the taste of him lingering on my tongue was like sin. I actually brought my fists to my mouth and bit them to fight temptation. It didn't help when I saw him getting hard all over again.

"Come here," he said, holding out his hand. "Just one little taste, I know you want to…I want you to."

Sin and temptation versus my weak will; impossible to resist but I tried. I shook my head more to clear it than to refuse. "No," I told him. "I'll hurt you worse."

The last word of that sentence sounded off, I'd cut my upper lip on my fangs. I meant to say worse but it sounded like 'worcfe'. Great…

I wanted to say that Eric understood but he gave me no response. His eyes watched a light trickle of blood as it seeped from my lips. I knew he was going to attack. There was no fear, nothing of the sort. I was tingling with anticipation and desire. He would pounce and then fuck me mercilessly as he fed. Any and all attempts at civility or sanity would be lost. I don't think I'd ever wanted anything more.

We were two mated predators in a room with the scents of our blood and fucking to heighten our cravings. All my fears of poor fang work were forgotten. I wanted some of him; I didn't care how I got it. In between the haze of our loving we had bloods to keep up our strength. It was almost noon when Eric and I passed out from exhaustion.

Eric woke before me much later. "You are not a cheerleader," He said. "You can't be."

"Hey!" I grumbled. "I can too."

"Okay, you have the ass and tits for it," He said squeezing the respective parts of my body. Easy as his touch was, it was enough to have me think of starting something. He pet me intimately but didn't let either of us get carried away. It was enough to feed my need for his touch.

"Inability to carry a tune aside, you are too strong. You sit aside and watch as the need to run dances in your eyes."

I couldn't deny that but the thought of running amongst the vampires of this area was something I didn't think I was ready to do. There were several reasons; the main one was that I didn't want to explain. Vampires weren't the only ones present at the games. The humans present would see and they would talk. I knew it was cowardly but I wasn't ready to let go of the ordinariness that being human brought me.

"All the regents of Amun know what you are," He said.

I nodded, wishing that wasn't the case. It had been a split second decision. I had to step in or they were going to string up Peter by his intestines and wait for the sun to bake him. I had bought their cooperation with money and their silence with fear the night my father banished me. Fear wouldn't hold them forever. To be honest I was surprised that no one had written a tell-all book about me yet.

"Then where is the harm in you standing out?" he asked.

"I'm just not ready to." I replied. "I like…"

"Pretending," he inserted.

There was no condemnation or judgment. He was just stating what he thought was true. "I can understand that."

I scoffed. He was trying to make me feel better; those were the only times that Eric lied to me with no compunction. He turned me so we were eye to eye.

"I mean it," he said firmly. "I went from human to vampire. The roles and expectation were plain in both forms. Young as you are, you have had the most complicated life and it confounds my mind to contemplate the complexities of it. . You were raised to be a Queen by vampires. Yet, you are not fully vampire nor are you entirely human or Fae. Finding your place can't be easy and I don't think it ever was."

"My place is with you," I said immediately. "There is nowhere in this world I would rather be."

"I know, and truly I know how lucky I am, but you are stifling yourself," He held my face in his hands so we were eye to eye. "You don't have to. I love you. I would never want that for you."

I don't know why but I just wanted to hug him and cry. That was exactly what I did. It was only because I felt safe and loved enough to do something that made me look so weak. He held me tight against him as if trying to smother my pain away.

"The only thing that I'm sure about is you, us," I blubbered. "Everything else…I just have to take one day at a time."

"I am sorry to make you feel that it must be now, it doesn't have to be. One day at a time is nothing, Lover," He said while he wiped my tears. He smiled my smile at me and it was beyond adoring. It took all my insecurities and ground them to dust. "We have forever."

A/N: I know this Fic has a bit of a slow start but just stick with me.