Notes: Told you I'd probably write more than one for this episode. :DThis one is set after the two Sharons meet but before the scene with our Sharon and Rusty the next morning.

Personal Day II

When the knock sounded at her office door, Sharon was barefoot at her desk, rubbing the balls of her sore feet against the feet of her chair. She'd reached the end of a very long day with little of anything left to draw upon, between the case and the sudden and very unexpected reappearance of Sharon Beck. Of Rusty's mother.

It hurt.

Sharon knew who was at the door.

"Come in." She slid her feet back into her shoes. She wasn't ready to go home yet.

"Lieutenant."

"Captain." Provenza looked first to one of the chairs in front of her desk and then to her, and he sat when she nodded. "I believe you wanted to see me."

This, she was ready for.

"I did."

"All right," he said, spreading his arms. "Let's hear it."

When Sharon was really unhappy about something, people never needed to ask.

"If it's any reassurance, Lieutenant," she began, "on the list of things I'm currently not pleased about, you're somewhere near the bottom."

"Should we start there and work our way up?"

"Mmm." Sharon leaned forward, her fingers knitting themselves tightly together as she braced her arms against her desk. "Okay. Here it is. I realize that I interrupted you trying to persuade Rusty to come to me himself, which I do appreciate. And I'm glad that he has you in his life, Lieutenant. Very glad."

God knew Rusty's life needed all the positive adult influences they could find him.

"But... I do not like being blindsided like that, especially when it concerns the welfare of my child. Yes, Lieutenant, I know what I said." Her voice grew dangerously low. Sharon took a deep breath and forced her fingers to relax. "I also know that it would never have been an easy conversation for Rusty to have with me, so maybe it was best that we just rip that bandaid off all at once. I'm not sure."

Provenza was still giving her a sympathetic look when she finished.

Sharon sighed, and moved on.

"You've spent more time with her," she said. "What do you think?"

"She seems to think she means it," he said. "For now. We'll see."

Sharon made another hmm and edged her chair forward. "And how did Rusty seem, in the car?"

"He let her do most of the talking," Provenza said. "And he didn't say a whole lot on the way back."

"To me, either." Though that was hardly surprising.

"Where's the kid now?"

"At home." Sharon couldn't help the wryness that crept into her voice. "He told me he'd save me some dinner but that he'd had a very long day and would probably be asleep before I got back."

It was six thirty.

But he'd called to tell her, at least, instead of texting, and he'd sounded well enough when he'd told her good night. She would give him his space. It bought her some more time to plan how to approach him. A light touch would be best, she thought. She wanted to proceed very, very carefully with him.

"It's almost my bedtime," Provenza informed her, "and I believe there were more points on that list?"

That sobered her.

"I don't suppose Rusty's mother—" That cost her something to say, but she supposed she'd better get used to it. Sharon cleared her throat. "Did she happen to mention where she's spent the last two years?"

"She did not. But, uh, I know how you like to have all the facts, Captain, so I made a few very discreet inquiries and politely called in a few favors, and as best I can tell, they went back to Reno and returned to LA County a year ago."

"A year?" she repeated.

"More or less."

That would've been right around the time of Rusty's seventeenth birthday. He'd rebuffed most of her suggestions to celebrate, and he'd thanked her for his presents but only picked at his cake. He'd been mopey and withdrawn at Christmas too... though Sharon wasn't honestly sure that she had been much better herself, because she had been missing her children just as much as he had been missing his mother.

His eighteenth birthday had been a little easier. She thought he'd enjoyed himself more, and she was more relieved than anything else that there would be no more attempts to remove him from her home. He was staying right where he was until he chose to be somewhere else, and he hadn't shown any signs of budging yet.

Sharon could only hope this wouldn't change anything.

She sighed. "And then?"

"Picked up around ten weeks ago," Provenza told her. "Now, they busted Gary for everything from felony distribution to assaulting the arresting officer, so we won't have the pleasure of making his acquaintance anytime soon, but they held Rusty's mother for possession. After having a few weeks to think things over in county, she warmed up to the idea of rehab."

"And here we are." Her fingers were clenched again. "I'm going to ask you for a small favor, Lieutenant. If Gary should miraculously reenter the picture, I would appreciate it if you kept him out of my line of sight."

She hadn't forgotten what Rusty looked like with a black eye and a swollen, bloody lip.

My mother's boyfriend used to do this sort of thing to me like once a week.

It took a lot to surprise Provenza, but he didn't so much as lift an eyebrow.

Sharon released a deep breath. "I'm also... concerned about the effect this will have on Rusty if his mother decides not to continue her treatment two weeks from now. If she disappears again..."

He would be devastated. Rusty rarely mentioned his mother to her. Sharon hoped he talked about her more with Dr. Joe, but while Rusty sometimes told her what went on during his sessions, he hadn't for awhile. Sharon didn't need to be told that in spite of whatever anger and confusion Rusty felt towards his mother, he'd also spent three years loving and missing her and not even knowing if she was alive.

That was an awful feeling.

She just didn't want to see him with a broken heart.

"He knows it's a possibility," Provenza told her. "He's trying to be realistic about the whole thing."

Sharon wondered what they'd talked about in the car.

"I do hope that she stays," she said quietly. Whatever else she was feeling, that much was true. "Rusty loves her, and if he wants to have a relationship with her, then I want him to have that option."

Provenza cleared his throat. "He loves you too."

"I know." Sharon felt the pull of a faint smile.

Two years ago, she would never have guessed that one day she would be confiding in the lieutenant or looking to him for reassurance. Or parenting advice.

That Rusty was her child had stopped surprising her a long time ago.

Part of her had adopted him the moment she'd come home, thinking that he'd run away, and instead found him waiting for her.

The more sensible part had waited until Daniel Dunn had resoundingly proven himself to be an unfit parent. With his father was out of the way and his mother was gone, Sharon had found herself treating Rusty just the same as she'd treated her other children. For all of the unique challenges that came with mothering him, Rusty was remarkably normal in most other ways. She'd made his lunches and bothered him about his homework, and tried to gently and not-so-gently steer him in the right direction.

It had been enough to privately think of herself as his mother, until he'd turned eighteen and outgrown her guardianship.

That had been on her mind a lot, lately.

But in this situation, what Rusty needed mattered more than what Sharon personally wanted, and what Rusty needed right now was not for her to push him into a conversation that she wasn't sure she was ready to have herself. He definitely wasn't ready, and she was glad now that she hadn't broached the subject. That would be there waiting for them later.

His mother might not be, and they both knew it. That was really what broke her heart.