AN: The more reviews I get, the happier I am. ;)

Rory closed the door to her house and leaned against it, trying desperately to stop her hands from shaking. What just happened? What the hell was going on? The house was dark, but she knew her mother was awake upstairs and would be plodding down to say hello any second now. But before Rory started explaining to the insistent Lorelai, she had to figure out everything for herself.

She shoved the keys to Colin's BMW into her purse so she wouldn't lose them and made her way to her bedroom. Disappearing in there would provide her with a few extra minutes of alone time before Lorelai came downstairs. As she placed her purse on the dresser, the scene with Logan began replaying in her mind. She had every opportunity to pull away before their lips actually connected, but she had felt like she was frozen in place. And his eyes. God, those eyes. He'd been staring at her like she was the most beautiful and important thing in the world, and she never wanted to look away.

And then his hands had braced the back of her neck, and she knew exactly what was coming. His lips had hovered before hers ever so briefly, and then he had graced her with the sweetest, most mind blowing kiss she'd ever experienced. She'd almost found herself looking for the fireworks as she pressed her hands against his chest, trying to get closer to him then she already was. But then, as she felt herself melting into his arms, she remembered. She remembered Jess, everything he had put her through, and Logan's not so promising dating history. She realized that she couldn't let herself like him, she couldn't put herself in the position to have her heart shattered again. And with just one kiss, she knew Logan would have every capability of doing just that. And so she pulled away, and then disappeared as quickly as possible. Another broken heart was something she couldn't afford, not right now.

The ringing of her cellphone interrupted the reminiscing, and she quickly dug it out of her purse. When she saw Logan's number on the screen, she placed on back on her dresser without a second thought. She couldn't talk to him, not tonight, not quite yet; not when her heart was still pounding and her lips were still tingling from the kiss.

And yet, even though she was hurting, she couldn't help the small smile that reached her face as she pressed her fingertips against her lips. Even if nothing became of her and Logan, every girl should be kissed like that at least once in her life.

But then she remembered Jess, and how much he had hurt her. Was she really willing to go through all that pain again? Logan was a playboy, what were the odds that he was actually going to stick around? She couldn't let herself fall for him, she wasn't strong enough. After what Jess had done, trusting the male gender was going to be extremely difficult. And Logan? He wasn't a good choice, he couldn't be her boyfriend. Did he even want to be? Or was he just out to make her another notch in his belt?

But God, that kiss...

Her cellphone beeped that she had a voicemail and she reached for it, dialing her password and waiting impatiently. After a few moments, Logan's voice came clearly through the speaker:

"Hey, Ace. It's Logan. I have to admit, that's usually not the reaction I get after I kiss a girl. However, you have proven to me time and time again that you're not the average girl. And I'm hoping your reaction had more to do with your unique perspective on life than my kissing abilities. But seriously, I hope everything's okay. And I'm sorry. I think. Should I be?"

She couldn't help but laugh softly as the voicemail finished and she clamped her phone shut. Leave it to the ever cocky Logan Huntzberger to make the situation not sound quite so awkward. And she had to admit, her reaction had absolutely nothing to do with Logan's kissing abilities. Nothing at all.

Should I be?

She wasn't sure. Was there something to be sorry about? Or was there something to build on? Wait, what was she thinking? Nothing could happen between her and Logan, they were two very different people. But everytime she remembered the kiss, she could hardly remember the name of her ex-boyfriend.

"Hey mini-me!" Lorelai greeted, bounding into Rory's room, "How was the party? Oh my God you're pale. What happened?"

Rory took a deep breath, "Logan kissed me."

"Excuse me?" Lorelai demanded, her mouth dropping open.

"Logan kissed me," Rory repeated.

"Like out of the blue? He just walked up and laid one on you?"

"Yes, mom, that's exactly what happened," she deadpanned.

"Well, come on, Rory. Mommy needs details."

"We were dancing," Rory explained, "And it was nice, really nice. And then we made eye contact and he was just staring at me. And then he kissed me."

"Was it a good kiss?"

"Mom! That's hardly the point. I kissed Logan."

"Actually, whether or not it was a good kiss is very much the point. Who wants to date a bad kisser?"

Rory rolled her eyes, but couldn't help the wistful smile that took over her, "Yes, it was a good kiss."

"A very good kiss going by the look on your face," Lorelai corrected.

"It doesn't matter."

"Um, yeah it does."

"Logan is a playboy, mom. It meant nothing to him."

"You don't know that."

"Yes, I do. And besides that, I interrupted it with a nice walk-out worthy of an Academy Award, I'm sure."

"Rory!" Lorelai protested, "Why?"

"Because I don't want to get my heart broken again," Rory almost whispered.

"Aww, kid," Lorelai wrapped her arm around her daugther's shoulders, "You don't know that Logan would break your heart."

"Actually, what I know is he's not interested. Logan doesn't do commitment."

"He could change."

"Maybe," Rory sighed, "But it's doubtful. But mom, it was such an amazing kiss. I've never been kissed like that before. Everything about it was just...just..."

"Perfect?" Lorelai suggested.

"That sounds like a good adjective."

"You really like him don't you?" Lorelai asked.

Rory was silent as she allowed herself to be guided into the kitchen. Lorelai started a pot of coffee and then sat down across from her daugther, staring at her intently.

"You know those kisses you see in the movies?" Rory inquired, "Those room spinning, knee weakening kisses that we always say don't actually exist?"

Lorelai nodded.

"They exist," Rory confirmed, "They definitely exist."

"So, answer my question," Lorelai prodded.

"I don't want to like him," Rory replied firmly.

"But you do, don't you?"

Rory twirled a stand of hair around her finger, "I really do. But Jess..."

She let her voice trail off, thoughts of Jess clouding her mind. She still missed him, most of the time it would come down on her suddenly before she even had a chance to think about it. Other times, it was a dull ache in her heart that she had to ponder awhile before she could place a finger on it. Either way, she missed him. But when she thought about the kiss with Logan, well, she didn't miss him at all. The only thing she missed was the feeling of Logan's lips pressed against hers.

This was confusing. When did everything get so damn confusing?

"What about Jess?"

Rory shrugged, "I wish I knew."

--------

The ringing of Rory's cellphone woke her up the next morning, and after checking the caller id, she snapped it open bitterly.

"Do you have a death wish, Colin?"

"No, but I'd kind of like my car back."

"And you need your car back at ten in the morning? After we were up all night?"

"What can I say? I miss it."

"You are going to die."

"I'm bringing coffee."

"There's coffee here."

"From the big coffee place."

"You're lucky you know me so well," Rory grumbled, "Where are you?"

"About twenty minutes away, with Stephanie."

"No Finn?"

"I'm sorry, our Finn?"

"Oh, right. The whole fearing the sun thing."

"I wouldn't say fearing..."

"Dreading? Hating?"

"All good verbs. See you soon, Ror."

"Bye."

Rory closed her phone and groaned, throwing herself back onto the bed and burying her face in a pillow. The events of the night came back to her in a rush, and as she remembered the kiss, she felt like the wind had been knocked out of her. Why did her stomach have to flip everytime she remembered being in his arms? What was this strange control he had over her? She was a friend to him, a friend and nothing more. He could never commit to her even if she was willing to give him a chance. He didn't do commitment, she knew this almost from the second she met him. There was no hope. And even if there was, was she willing to take the chance with him? A relationship with Logan had heartbreak written all over it, and after Jess, one more heartbreak might be more than she could handle.

Sighing, she forced herself up out of bed and grabbed a change of clothes. Maybe a long, hot shower and a huge cup of coffee would shine some light on her current situation. Then again, maybe not.

But at least she would get some coffee out of it.

--------

"Where are my keys?" Colin demanded, as Rory came bounding down the stairs.

"Purse. Room."

"What? No complete sentences."

"Coffee," Rory answered simply, making her way into the kitchen.

Stephanie followed her to the table, and Colin appeared soon afterwards with his keys in hand. Rory poured three mugs of coffee and then sat down at the table with her friends, trying to avoid their curious gazes as she savored one extended sip after another.

"Well?" Colin asked finally, his tone laced with impatience.

"Well what?" Rory shot back innocently.

"Where to start?" Stephanie picked up, "Well, why did you and Logan kiss? Well, why did you take off afterwards? Well, why do you look like you got no sleep last night? I could go on forever."

Rory pressed her fingers to her temples, "I don't want to talk about it."

Colin rolled his eyes, "Do you and Logan share a brain?"

"God, I hope not," Rory retorted with a small smile.

"We're getting off track," Stephanie protested.

"Sorry."

"No you're not. Now, tell us what happened."

Rory groaned, "You're not going to leave until I tell you, are you?"

"Nope," Colin replied with a smirk.

"Fine. We were dancing. And then, I don't know. Something happened and he was looking at me," Rory turned towards Stephanie, "You know the look, you've seen the boy in action. And then he kissed me and I kissed him and then I got scared."

"Scared?" Colin questioned.

"Of Logan. You know him, Colin. I don't want to have my heart broken again."

"Well, he is Logan," Colin admitted, "But wait, your heart broken? You like him?"

Rory shrugged, not ready to admit that much to her friends yet, but she could tell by the way Stephanie was looking at her that the blonde already knew.

"I wouldn't judge Huntz too strongly on his past experience with girls," Stephanie said, "He may be an idiot, but he's not stupid."

"What does that mean?" Rory asked slowly, raising her eyebrows in amusement.

"Believe me, Ror, if you weren't different for him, he would've tried to get you in bed already," Stephanie explained.

"She's right, you know," Colin agreed.

"You're both nuts," Rory informed them firmly.

"Whatever. We have to go. I have a lovely dinner to go to, and Steph has some kind of appointment. Thanks for giving me my car back," he added, rolling his eyes.

"You're welcome. Bye guys."

"See ya."

--------

It was when she was walking out the door an hour later, hands stuffed in a red hoodie, that she realized how much could change between the two of them now. It seemed unavoidable that their friendship would fall apart, now matter how much Logan tried to save it with his phone call. She couldn't even make herself call him back, how was she going to carry on a conversation in person? And where was this all leading? Colin and Stephanie said that Logan knew she was different, but that could mean any number of things, including, 'Gee, I like you as a friend, but that kiss made me ill."

She ran her hands through her still damp hair and turned out of her driveway towards town. If four cups of coffee didn't help her thinking process, the only other thing she could think of was a long walk.

Groaning for what seemed like the millionth time that day, she shut her eyes briefly and just let her mind wander. And when she relaxed, and stopped thinking, her mind took to her to when Logan's hands were tucked behind her neck, and he was pressing his lips against hers in a earth shattering kiss. She blocked out the part where she walked away, that part she didn't want to remember. All her mind was focused on that kiss, and how secure she felt tucked in Logan's arms. Her heart jumped and she swallowed hard, pulling herself out of the memory. No. She couldn't fall for Logan. It had to be just confusion. It had to be.

"Rory?"

The sound of the familiar voice calling her name caused her eyes to form narrow slits. She was going to ignore him, but then decided to turn around and greet his presence with a bitter glare.

"Yeah?"

"You're hairs wet," Jess observed, taking a step forward.

"Thank you, Captain Obvious," she mumbled, crossing her arms over in a form of protection.

"Can we talk?" he questioned, ignoring her comment.

She was silent.

"Rory, please," he practically begged.

"Fine," she relented, her voice stoney, "Talk."

He reached out to grab her elbow, but she shook him away almost instantly. He sighed, then motioned towards the gazebo. She followed a few steps behind, watching him, waiting for the tears to form behind her eyes, but they didn't come. She was completely calm and she wasn't sure why.

"I miss you, Rory," Jess announced before they even sat down.

"Wow, you just jump right in there don't you?"

"Can you knock it off with the sarcasm?"

"That wasn't sarcasm," she shot back sweetly, "I was completely serious."

"Rory!"

"Fine," she relented, "Speak."

"I made a mistake, breaking up with you like I did. I didn't mean what I said, I really do love you. I was just upset and confused. I was worried, that's all. I know I can trust you. I miss you," he paused, "So, what do you say?"

She stared at him for a second, blinked, and then opened her mouth, "What do I say to what?"

"Getting back together with me."

Her breath caught in her throat, and she couldn't open her mouth to speak. What did he just say? After everything he put her through, everything he said and all the lies he told, he wanted her to take him back? But then again, isn't this exactly what she wanted? For him to say that he really did love her, and trusted her, and for her to run back into his arms? But as she sat there, staring at him, thinking about her answer, she didn't feel the familiar butterflies in her stomach. The only thing she felt was pure anger, bordering on hatred. And she didn't hate anyone. How dare he! How dare he attempt to toy with her emotions like this. And at that second, she realized something very important. She wasn't in love with Jess, she was in love with the idea of him, in love with who she always wanted him to be. Jess's kisses never weakened her knees, and Jess never made her feel like he would do anything in the world for her. She didn't want Jess back, she wanted...she wanted...

"Rory?"

Her head snapped up, "No."

"No?" he stammered, "What do you mean no?"

"I mean no," she answered firmly, "No to you, no to your bullshit, no to everything. You don't get to tell me you love me, take it back, and then throw it back out there again. You don't get to do that! Who the hell do you think you are? Better yet, who the hell do you think I am? I'm not going to sit around waiting for you to make up you're mind for good. I'm not that girl."

"I have made up my mind. It's you, Rory. I'm sorry for everything that happened, but I lo--"

"Don't even say it," she seethed, "We're over. For good. What we had, and yes, past tense there, is over."

She glanced up into his eyes again, noticing the sadness that was hidden behind the anger. Maybe he was just confused, and maybe he really did love her, but none of that was a good enough excuse. Not anyone. At that moment, what Colin and Finn had always told her was ringing true in her mind. Jess wasn't good enough for her, and he never would be. If he couldn't make up his mind that he wanted to be with her, then she didn't need him in her life. She needed someone who would make her feel safe, someone who would push her to do better. She didn't need Jess.

"Rory, come on."

"Save it," she muttered, "I'm going home. Goodbye, Jess."

She turned and walked down the steps of the gazebo, noticing how no tears were burning in the back of her eyes. She felt no sadness. There was anger, yet no loneliness. For the first time she felt completely content about breaking up with Jess, and she knew there would be no going backwards. He was out of her life, for good. And knowing that made her feel like a weight had been lifted off her shoulders. And she couldn't help but silently thank Logan for it, because with out his friendship, and God help her, his kiss, she probably would've ended up back in Jess's embrace.

She turned down away from town back towards her house, thinking about what she was going to say to Logan when she finally got up the nerve to call him back. First and foremost, she was going to thank him. And then, they would deal with the kiss. Somehow they would deal with it. And if it simply ended up in friendship? Well, her and the butterflies were just going to have to deal with that.

She took a step into her driveway, but what she saw when she raised her eyes stopped her dead in her tracks. Her breathing became almost frantic, and she tried desperately to steady her rapid heartbeat.

"Logan," she murmured.