Chapter 11: Knowledge

She was cold. She was soaked. She was miserable. It was all her husband's damn fault. 'You need to invite your mother,' He told her time and time again as they made plans to go to Retroville for Thanksgiving. 'She's your mother.' Because he couldn't leave well enough alone and accept that her and her mother would never have the great relationship that he had with his parents. Hadn't he figured that out when she hadn't shown up to their wedding? But he had pushed and pushed and she finally agreed. Much to her surprise, so had her mother.

It was the biggest mistake she ever made.

First, her mother was over an hour late, forcing everyone to stand around, stomachs growling (also, yes, everyone. The Folfax's and the Wheezer's, along with Carl and Elkie and Sheen and Libby). When her mother had finally shown up, she had taken one look at Cindy and said, "Cynthia, I thought we discussed your weight problem." Before shoving her coat at Jimmy and walking into the dinning room.

It had been nothing but criticisms following. The food ("Oh, Judy, how you managed to make the gravy compliment that dryness of the chicken is amazing."), her career choice, (Why Cynthia chose a vicious career in law instead of saving people's lives as a doctor I will never understand, but she's always been quite selfish.), all of which Cindy could bite her tongue and take like she always had, but when she started in on Jimmy, Cindy threw down her fork and said in a cold voice that surprised even her, "Would you stop!"

Her mother blinked at her. "Whatever do you mean Cynthia?"

"Like you don't know!" Cindy shouted getting up out of her seat, her anger zeroing in on her mother, "You show up an hour late, you've insulted everything including me, but do not start in on Jimmy."

By this time, her mother had also raised from her seat, and was glaring at her daughter. "Well, maybe, I wouldn't have to if you had married someone better!"

"Better! Oh that's rich." Cindy gave a hollow laugh. "He's rich and famous. Nothing else matters to you mother. What's the problem?"

"He's still a Neutron."

The phrase hung in the air for a moment before Cindy shook her head. "You hypocritical bitch! Is it because I actually am young and still have a future unlike you at my age?"

It happened so quickly that no one could react. Mrs. Vortex slapped Cindy before turning on her heel and marching out the front door.

Cindy stood there for a split second before following suit out the back door with a slam. Her feet reacted while her brain was still trying to catch up, taking her into the depths of Retroville Park.

Back at the Neutron house, everyone was shaken to the core at the set of events.

"That was unbelievable." Mrs Wheezer finally said.

The words were out of Libby's mouth before she could stop them, "At least there wasn't blood this time."

Everyone turned to stare at her. "This has happened before?" Mrs. Neutron asked, her voice small, as if she was afraid of the answer.

When Libby hesitated, Jimmy's voice rang out, "Libby. Please."

The brunette sighed and then said softly, "It's only what Cindy told me. And I think- I know- there's more that's happened that she hasn't told me." Slowly, softly, she weaved a horrendous tale at the Neutron's dining room table. How Cindy's mother had a history of slapping her daughter if she didn't perform as well as she should. How she would refuse to feed her when she made her mad. How she was forced to practice piano for hours on end until her fingers bled Through the whole thing, Libby ignored the gasps and outcries, focusing only on the horrid tale she had been forced to keep a secret and refusing to meet the eyes of the one person who would take it more to heart than anyone else.

When she was finished, Jimmy abruptly stood, and went upstairs. Tears clouded Libby's eyes but the opening of a door, silenced her.

She sat under the bridge, staring into the swirling water for what seemed like hours. The irony of the fact that she was doing exactly what she had been doing for most of her childhood even as a successful adult was not lost on her. Her mind turned to the reactions she would receive when she got back. She knew that by now Libby had told them everything, which was okay. It was probably about time the truth came to light. But facing everyone, seeing their reactions, that was the part she was not looking forward to. The shock from everyone else, her in-laws, her friends, her husband…

Oh, gods.

She learched to the side, momentarily woozy as her stomach rid itself of all the evening's meal. Cindy shrunk even more into herself, eyes closed, mind clouded as she thought of how her husband would react. It was the one secret that she had been determined to take to the grave.

So much for that idea.

A distant boom of thunder startled her from her thoughts. She squinted through the light curtain of rain to the North, where a flash of lightening confirmed her fears. Sighing, she stood up, brushed herself off, and turned to walk back towards the Neutron house, sending up prayers for strength at every step.

The minute she walked into the house she was surrounded. Judy was wrapping her in a soft towel while Mrs. Folfax gently squeezed the water out of her hair, and Mrs. Wheezer handed her a cup of coffee. Through the older woman's care she managed to lock eyes with her best friend who bit her lip and nodded once. Cindy just gave her a small smile back. She looked through the crowd but not finding the person she was looking for inquired, "Where's Jimmy?"

The way Judy winced, this was clearly not what she wanted her to ask. Before she could respond however, Libby stepped forward, "Cindy, why don't you spend the night at my house tonight? It'll be like a sleepover."

If the story of Cindy's childhood wasn't enough to depress everyone, the look on her face when Cindy clued into what was happening with her husband broke their hearts. "Oh, I-" She looked down at the ground. "Okay." She glanced up at the stairs as Libby bustled around her, not hearing anything but her heart breaking.

4 a.m. found him sitting at the table in the kitchen, coffee in hand, staring out the window, thought going miles per hour, in a million different directions.

How did I miss that?

Why didn't she tell me?

I should have stopped it.

Sleep had avoided him. Every time he closed his eyes, he saw Cindy, bruised and bloody, begging him for help. He wasn't sure what was worse. Dealing with his nightmares or dealing with his new form of reality.

"Jimbo?" His dad's voice cut through his thoughts and saw his parents take a seat beside him on the bench.

"We couldn't sleep either," His mom said softly. "Not after, well, you know."

He nodded and looked down into his cold cup. "How did I miss it?"

"We all did son." Hugh responded. "We all did."

"But I'm a genius! I should have known!"

Knowing dawned on both of the Neutron's as they looked at their son. "Jimmy, this isn't you fault." Judy told him.

"Like hell it's not! I was the one competing with her. Maybe, if I had just toned it down or something-"He broke down and his parents reached over to console him.

"You didn't know Jimmy. None of us did." His mother whispered while stroking his hair. "But she needs you more than ever. Libby called. Cindy's terrified that you want a divorce."

That got his attention. "Wait. What?"

"We know that you just need time to process." His dad told him, "But imagine what it looks like to Cindy."

Jimmy paled, "Oh gods." He rushed out of the kitchen as mother shouted after him, "Remember to put on pants!"

At 6:02, precisely, he arrived at the doorstep of the Folfax's. "C'mon, c'mon," He grumbled as he rang the doorbell and pounded on the door repeatedly.

Muttering was heard on the other side of the entryway and finally Libby opened the door, "Are you trying to wake the dead or-"She stopped and stared at him. "Jimmy-"

"Where's Cindy?"

"Upstairs."

He took the stairs two at a time until he found the spare bedroom. Cindy stood in the middle of the floor and for what seemed like forever, the two just stared at each other. Finally, Jimmy crossed the room and took her into his arms. She buried her head in his chest, sobs raking her body as they sank to the floor, a mad combination of limbs.

"I'm sorry I didn't tell you sooner."

"I'm sorry I couldn't stop it."

Slowly she raised her head to look at him. "That's nothing to be sorry for Jimmy. We were kids. You didn't know." She rested her head back on his chest. "I never blamed you."

A tidal wave of relief washed over him as he held her tighter. "And I don't want a divorce." He added quietly. "I just needed to process."

She sighed. "I know. Somewhere in my heart I knew that. I was just… terrified."

"I know the feeling." He sighed and gently smoothed down her hair. "I just wanted to understand you better. Your past is such a big part of you, but I only knew bits and pieces. I just wanted to understand my wife a little more. I didn't- I didn't realize that it was so… hurtful."

Cindy shifted a little, "The past does hurt. But you can either run from it, or learn from it."

He paused before bursting out into laughter. "Only you would quote The Lion King to me in the midst of a serious conversation."

She smiled at him. "It's true. I've moved beyond it. My past doesn't define me. It shaped me, that's all. I could have chosen to stay Cindy Vortex, abuse victim and helpless damsel, but instead I became Cindy Neutron, New York City's first woman District Attorney and wife to the most amazing man in the world."

"You give me too much credit. And not enough to yourself." She shrugged and attempted to cover up a yawn. Her husband smiled. "How about we go to the Black Sheep and get some breakfast?"

"And coffee?"

"Always." She scurried out of his arms and bustled around the room to get ready. He watched her for a moment before reaching out to grab her arm and pulling back into his arms so he could kiss her. "I love you."

She beamed. "I love you to. Now about that coffee…"

After all, tomorrow is another day.

A/N: The "Cindy being abused as a child" is a common thread that I do believe bonds all of the JN fanfiction writers together. Is it overdone? Possibly. Does it make sense in cannon? Absolutely. This will be reexamined further down the road but for now…

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