Chapter 3 - Gone
Shiro woke first to the emptiness surrounding him and tensed immediately, sending his reiatsu out to find Pantera. Though the bond was still there, he found that she was gone! This sent shockwaves of a fear that only could be described as panic into his King, thereby disturbing his own slumber.
Ichigo entered his mindscape, sleepy, and obviously pulled from a dream, as his unruly hair stuck up even more and he was yawning. "Whatsa matter, 'Ro?" His speech slurred with exhaustion, the last month had been Hell on the death berry, and he hadn't even begun to catch up the sleep he'd lost due to the heat.
"She's gone!" Shiro grabbed him and shook him violently once before Ichigo was fully awake and able to push back.
"Who's gone?" Ichigo tilted his head, and then turned to take in the jungle and the change of the shade of blue of the sky, now it perfectly matched Grimm's eyes.
Shiro attempted to shake him again, "Pantera! She's gone!" The normally composed, and downright smug Hollow was frazzled and Ichigo frowned as he took in the other's appearance. His eyes asked, and Shiro answered without the question being spoke aloud. "My mate! Blue's Zanpakutou. She had me take 'er! And now she's gone!"
Ichigo seemed to gather the clarity to understand what was going on at that point and looked around more in earnest this time. Though the mindscape had physically changed very little outside of the sudden outburst of greenery, but that wasn't completely out of line since he'd promised both spirits some gardens before and had never been able to produce them the way he liked. Eventually his eyes rested on Zangetsu.
"Oi, Ojiisan, you seem pretty calm about all of this. What's yer perspective?" The orangette tried to send out the same kind of soothing waves of reiatsu the Pain in the Ass had used on him at various times during his heat. It had a marginal effect, mostly because Ichigo was still so weakened by his turmoil.
"I had thought that perhaps the young lady had returned to her Master's mindscape for the time being, but if Shiro-san cannot sense her at all, then I fear we have an even larger problem on our hands." Stepping down from his flagpole, the eldest of the three spirits gathered the two younger into an embrace, more with his shihakusho than his arms, and the three unconsciously leaned in together to touch foreheads. The rumbling voice of the sword continued, "Perhaps, Ichigo, you should rouse your body from its slumber and determine the status of the Living World?" A small shudder unconsciously ran through the orangette, but he was answered with a purr and the assurance that both would be right behind him, watching through the glass of the building.
His eyes fluttered open and the amber orbs widened as he took in the absence of the reiatsu who'd saved him from his fever dreams. Sitting upright fast enough to tumble all of the blankets to the floor, he took in the whole room with a single sweeping glare. It just couldn't have been a dream! But there, in front of his eyes and senses, there was no blue panther, and no trace that he'd ever been inside the room at the Shoten where Ichigo had agreed to wait out the rest of his heat.
He dressed quickly, panic slowly clutching his heart in ways he didn't know he could feel, as all three pieces of his soul feared for the fate of their Mate. He didn't even bother with underwear, socks, or a shirt, merely pulling his miraculously repaired jeans on over his somehow not painful behind, and crashed through the paper screen door separating his room from the common area at the back of the store.
"Where is he!" He practically screamed at the gathered Shinigami and Visoreds. His reiatsu swept across them like a canine searching for a scent. Not finding the one he wanted, he growled low and made a dash for the door of the shop. The only one of the crowd able to overcome his shock was Shinji.
"Where is who, Ichigo?" The blonde looked worried as he gathered the orangette's face in his hands to read the wildly searching eyes of the younger Visored.
"Grimmjow!" Ichigo cried, and literally felt his heart beginning to break. His soul was missing something, and no one seemed to know what was going on.
Kisuke frowned over his tea, and the others gathered looked on as Shinji frowned even deeper in worry. "Ichigo, why would Grimmjow be here?"
Trying to tear himself from his Pack Leader's grasp, Ichigo whined. "He's my mate! He's my Alpha! Where is he?" he began to dissolve into broken breaths, his eyes stinging almost as much as his chest.
The Shinigami, unaccustomed to the wildly erratic behavior of one they regarded as the strongest among them, shifted in their seats. Renji caught Byakuya's eye, and the fear played between the crimson and raven regarding the orangette didn't need to be spoken out loud. Kisuke quickly gestured that Tessai should get his strongest healing kido ready, and Shinji tried desperately to bring the distraught berry back to the realm of sanity.
The orangette stubbornly refused to be calmed by any other than the one he'd chosen, and so Tessai released the kido, immediately knocking the death berry back into unconsciousness. The collected group breathed a sigh of relief as the wild reiatsu dissipated with the removal of Ichigo.
"Grimmjow, huh?" Renji was the first to speak, fingering his cup gently.
Next to him, on the other side to Byakuya, Rukia sighed deeply. "How long has it been, Urahara-san?"
"Almost a month, Rukia-san." The shopkeeper drank from his tea sadly.
Shinji rejoined the group, sitting between Kisuke and Hiyori, who was next to Rukia. This left a place for Tessai to sit between Byakuya and Kisuke. The blonde rubbed his temples. "If we could just find that damned panther, or the demon, or any of them damned Arrancars!"
"So the reports are correct?" Byakuya spoke for the first time since the group had been called together, a few hours before Ichigo's awakening. "Even the Gargantas from here will not reach Hueco Mundo?"
Both blondes shook their heads and all three Shinigami pursed their lips in thought. Nothing like this had ever happened before. Of course, never had a wave of such pure reiatsu swept the three worlds as what had happened when Grimmjow finally claimed Ichigo as his mate. It had been almost a month since then, and the strange disappearance of the Hollows weighed heavily on everyone's mind.
Ichigo was quickly descending into a constant state of madness. Shinji and the Visoreds called it "Mating Sickness". Literally to regain his sanity, Ichigo needed his Mate's reiatsu, but none of the Visoreds had ever seen it this bad. When they were first discovering the animalistic needs of their inner Hollows they had mistakeningly assumed that sex would solve the issue, but when Lisa had practically torn Mashiro to pieces for cuddling up to Kensei the day after he mated with the dark-haired Visored female, the group had come to the conclusion that it was more than just physical lust. Shinji and Love had to take her to Kisuke bound in Hachi's strongest kido. With them though, the Sickness wore off after a few days of cuddling and being close to the one they mated with, even if that person wasn't a Visored. Though, they had to be careful with that. At least Kensei and Shinji had children with Human women, who had been convenient during mating season almost 75 years ago. Both children had crossed over with their mothers to the Soul Society successfully, but it had been touch and go for a little while to see which half the child took after and whether they would have the same Hollow-type issues. Since then, they only mated with each other, except for Hachi, who was a Beta but seemingly asexual as his Hollow was an Alpha, and Hiyori, who seemed to never age from the pre-adolescent size she'd been as a Shinigami therefore never reaching Hollow adulthood.
But none of the Visoreds had ever developed the kinds of markings that Ichigo now sported. His left cheek was permanently stained with the lines of red from his first Hollow mask, and on the right side of his neck a backwards "6" in thick, black, gothic style, just like that of an Espada, had appeared where a huge, almost black bruise had been the morning after the Mating.
The next time Ichigo woke again, almost two weeks later, there was a distinct calm to his features for about ten seconds. Then Kisuke, who had been monitoring the berry this morning, watched as his face became an ominous shade of pale green. His jaw clenched and he stared at the ceiling, not moving a single muscle. A second later the shopkeeper had a waste basket in front of the ailing Visored, who promptly emptied the minimal amount of food he had in his stomach into the can.
"Feeling better?" Kisuke asked with the faint hint of a sympathetic smile. Honey brown eyes flecked with gold looked up with a level of pain that Kisuke hadn't known for a very long time. "I know it hurts, Berry-chan." He brushed his long fingers through the orangette's bangs, and the tears began to well up in those tortured eyes. So, he knelt down and did something he would never have done had Ichigo been in his right mind; he pulled the orange head to his chest and simply held the boy. "Shh. I know. I may not have the same needs as a Visored, but I know that having your other half gone isn't easy for any race."
His words resounded through Ichigo's inner world, where Shiro and Ichigo had allowed their body to work on auto pilot. The two sides to the same coin looked out through the glass in one of the buildings from under the safety of the ledge where Zangetsu posed on his flagpole as rain came down in sheets all around them. The old man was currently sheltering them with his haori, as all three factions of the young hybrid knew exactly why he was sick.
After being knocked unconscious again by Tessai, Shiro and Zangetsu had kept Ichigo's consciousness within their shared mindscape rather than the deceptive dreams that caused a repetitive cycle of waking, re-discovering their missing mates, and the subsequent Mating Sickness. This allowed his body to actually relax, and made it easier for the others on the outside to care for him. It also allowed Ichigo to share his burden of pain with the only other being that felt the gaping hole where his mate should have been. Between them, Shiro and Ichigo drew closer, filling their missing halves with each other since one was Beta and the other Alpha. No longer did Ichigo think of his 'twin' as a Pain in the Ass, and all of Shiro's games seemed pointless now that the Sexta and his Zanpakutou were gone.
When the reiatsu drain of the last several months of heat had ebbed to a constant minor siphon the twins began investigating their inner world more thoroughly. So, it came as no small surprise when Zangetsu brought a bundle of brand new reiatsu to the mourning pair.
Watching the scene of the shopkeeper comforting the distraught body of the three souls drew their collective thoughts back to the day they discovered the precious bubble.
"Ojiisan, what's that?" Ichigo inquired tiredly, from his place pillowed on Shiro's chest. The pair sat up curious when the third said nothing, merely sat next to them. The better part of what constituted as a day in their mindscape had been spent trying to find the reiatsu siphon.
The bundle was pulsing in teal and red with flashes of white and was no bigger than a basketball. All three watched it as it pulsed, like a heartbeat. Ichigo was the first to react, reaching his hand out to touch the delicate ball, and immediately saw the effects. The ball drew on his reiatsu, pulling more red and white into itself.
"Huh." Was the only noise he made.
"King?" Shiro inquired when he didn't continue, and Zangetsu raised an eyebrow over his glasses.
Still staring in wonder, "I thought I would be more panicked about this."
The other two nodded.
Sighing, Ichigo drew them out of reverie, ghosting his hand across his middle, where the ball liked to rest now that they'd connected to each other. It wasn't visible anymore, but all three could feel it. After a few more seconds, Ichigo sighed again, drawing his counterparts attention. The rain let up, just a little.
"I think we need to move forward." His voice was strangely calm. "The Little One needs us. If we want her to be born healthy, we need to start taking care of our body. It'll be up to you two to feed her the reiatsu she needs until Gr-he gets back and can do it himself." His voice threatened to give out at the mention of his name. He really didn't want to leave the security and comfort of his mindscape, but all three of them knew he was right. The Little One wouldn't be able to grow properly if he didn't keep his reiatsu up, and being still alive meant that he had to feed his Human body. The last two weeks kept apart from the Living World, but surrounded by the transplanted jungle had broken the cycle of Mating Sickness. The pain was no less, the longing and sheer wrongness of the situation remained just as sharp as it had all of the times he had been roused from sleep since Grimmjow had disappeared, but no longer was their mental status threatened by insanity. So, with one last profound embrace among the three, Ichigo dissolved from his mindscape, leaving the bundle that was now mostly red and white in the capable hands of Zangetsu and Shiro.
Kisuke immediately noticed the difference in his student when Ichigo's consciousness came back to the forefront. He sat back, ignoring the wet spot on the front of his yukata, watching Ichigo for a few moments while the other wiped his face off with a corner of the blanket. Neither spoke of the hybrid's moment of despair.
Ichigo looked up and smiled, but though his scowl was not present, the smile did not reach his eyes. "Urahara-san, could w-I have a cup of ginger root tea with a squeeze of m-mint?" His voice was rough from disuse, and Kisuke had never heard Ichigo ever use honorifics like that.
"Of course, Berry-chan." Concern crossed the blonde man's face as he got up to get the tea, leaving the younger man to get dressed.
Upon exiting Ichigo's room, Kisuke was met by the concerned faces of Rukia, Shinji and Yoruichi. He waved them to follow him into the kitchen, where he proceeded to brew the tea. Silence stretched among the group, weighing heavily until he dropped the spoon a little harshly on the counter. All four of them jumped at the sound, and stared at the offending object as though it had done it on purpose. The painful aura in the air was something they had all become accustomed to in the last month, but when a hand, not attached to any of the gathered four took the spoon and cup, all the group could do was stare.
"Arigato, Urahara-san." Ichigo bowed lightly, taking his tea and exiting the Shoten to sit on the low wall and feel the breeze. The fresh air calmed his stomach some even before he sipped his tea.
With his exit, he seemed to have broken the tension. "What the hell!" Rukia exclaimed.
"He just woke up, was ill for a few minutes, then asked for tea." Kisuke shrugged.
Shinji watched where his packmate had gone, and asked, "Do you think he's gotten over the Mating Sickness? It took him longer, but he did mate a full Hollow."
"I don't know, but I don't think that is what has happened. I think it's more that something else has drawn out his resolve." The shopkeeper sighed and carried the rest of the tea to the table where they all had shared far too many silent meals over the last month and a half. Once all four were sitting, Kisuke continued, "When he came out of himself, the look in his eyes reminded me of the Winter War." He glanced around at the solemn faces, "He has steeled himself to see this through…again."
"But what will this do to him? We all saw his breakdown after losing his powers." Rukia bit her lip. "Nii-sama—" She hesitated. "He suggested maybe we should take him to Seireitei? That maybe, being surrounded by his closest friends will make it easier."
Shinji hmm'd. "It may help, but the Hollow within him won't be content, and that could be dangerous, given how powerful he is." He was very quick to hold his hands up. "Yare! I don't mean to sound like Yama-jii, but we all know what he's like when he loses control, ya?" The blonde Visored tried to crack his signature smile but he could tell that none at the table were really offended by his words.
For the next few moments they all sat and contemplated their tea, but then Rukia looked up, "Hey, Urahara-san, where's Yoruichi-sama?" The two males looked and quite obviously the feline speed goddess was missing.
Outside, with his eyes closed soaking in the sun and the wind and yukata open to expose his pale skin to the same elements, Ichigo heard the soft fwoosh of Shunpo and cracked an eye at the Flash Goddess, now perched next to him on the wall, without bothering to remove his hand from his lower abdomen or stop the small circles he was stroking with his thumb on the bared flesh. There really wasn't any change there; still the same hard, toned muscles and soft skin, but both parties knew it wouldn't stay that way for long.
"So…?" Yoruichi started.
"Hai." Ichigo closed his eyes again and silence stretched between them for a moment. "Hmm. The sun feels good. Warm. Like a blanket."
"How long?" The feline female moved to sit next to him.
Frowning for a moment as he conferred with his inner selves, "Six weeks." He paused his motions for a moment to take a drink of his well cooled tea. "It's odd, don't you think? We discuss time in terms of days, or months, or years, but when talking about something like this we count in weeks. It seems strange."
Yoruichi made a noncommittal noise and swung her feet trying to find something to say. Cocky, reckless, headstrong, ruthless, angry, even possessed Ichigo she knew how to talk to, but this resolved, peaceful person sitting next to her was a stranger. Someone she had never been able to really understand or get close to when he had adopted the mindset before.
"You can tell them if you want. I don't care if it's a secret." His voice cut through her thoughts and she just watched him curiously mimicking her feline half. He chuckled at the sight, then resumed enjoying the sunset. "It's all w-I have left of him, why would I be ashamed of it?"
"You're just taking this so much better than I would have expected, Berry-chan." She smiled wistfully. "Perhaps you've grown up."
He actually laughed at that, but it literally sounded Hollow, and it was then that she noticed why his voice sounded odd, it was duplicated, echo-like, and it sent chills down her spine. "Uh..?" She asked with a small frown.
"Yeah, that too." He finally turned and looked right at her with both eyes, one was his normal chocolate/amber mix, but the other—his left—was inverted, black sclera and liquid gold iris. Since his secret was out, he laughed a bit more openly. "We suppose it wasn't going to be long before we were discovered. We have an arrangement. We are stronger like this. We can handle the pain better. We don't suppose that you'd be able to just leave us to our devices, ne?"
"I—I don't know what to say. Are—are you—I mean—Shiro? Ichigo? What do we call you? Can we trust you? Are you possessed?" The questions almost came out before she could filter them.
"We don't really know, but we are not possessed." Internally half of him cackled at the thought. Then he sat up further, letting his yukata and eyes fall closed and for a moment was silent. When he looked at Yoruichi again both of his eyes were normal color but filled with a longing and pain that the feline could hardly bear. "I cannot survive like this, Yoruichi-sama. I need him to hold me up. Without Shiro, I cannot face the world. This time without—" He looked off at the fading light. "It's like half of my soul is missing. Like I'm standing and suddenly one of my legs is gone. Shiro is the crutch I use to stand. It is so much more painful than when I had to endure losing my reiatsu. Even though I didn't know I would be able to get my powers back, I still knew somewhere in my heart that when I died Ojiisan and Shiro would be waiting for me. I knew that we'd be together again eventually, but this?" He closed his eyes tightly, willing the burning to subside. "I don't know what's happened. All of our instincts are screaming at us that this is wrong, that something has happened. H-he would never abandon me. My instincts tell me that, and touching his Mark," He gestured to the backwards 6 on his neck, "lets me know that he truly is my mate. I just don't understand why he can't come to me. I Call and I Call, but he can't answer."
The feline female frowned for a moment, before the orangette had returned to consciousness they had decided not to tell him about the troubles regarding getting into Hueco Mundo, but it seemed that the Visored already had some idea about it. So she did what she usually does, and bit the bullet. "No one can establish a successful Garganta." He gasped and looked at her, both eyes wide as the sclera of his left began to bleed black again. She continued, "The Soul Society has had some—losses in trying to establish one. Furthermore, no Hollow of any level, not even Ulquiorra or Nel have been seen since the night of your mating."
His throat closed and it took Shiro to get out, "A-Aizen?"
Yoruichi shook her head. "No, there has been no change from him in the Maggot's Nest, and he has 'round the clock surveillance. If he had managed to do anything it would have happened as soon as we caught him, not now, four years later." She crossed her arms over her chest and glared at the ground, which Ichigo found a bit amusing as the move was quite familiar to him.
His voice broke through her thoughts again, "Who's been lost?"
"Kurotsuchi and most of the Science Division. The fool thought that if he and his team forced the thing open that they could make it through, but their transmitters never made it into Hueco Mundo. Yamamoto has reinstated Kisuke as taicho for the moment. There is a half-hearted hope that Kurotsuchi will return, but I'm sure you understand that not everyone shares that sentiment." She flashed him one of her signature smirks, and he found himself able to mirror it at the idea that the psychotic scientist had met a gruesome end.
As the sun dipped lower, casting shadows on the place where they were sunbathing, Ichigo's hybrid voice broke the easy silence. "I think I'd like to go home. My father and sisters should be the first to know." His left hand was once again tucked inside his yukata, brushing the skin there with his fingertips, though Yoruichi was uncertain as to whether it as Ichigo or Shiro that was controlling the motion.
"Alright." The Flash Goddess hopped off of the wall. "I'll keep Kisuke and the others busy while you make your getaway." She grinned over her shoulder as she sauntered off towards the Shoten. Though her outward appearance belied her concern. The orangette hadn't even noticed that she'd shifted from her feline form to sit with him, meaning he hadn't reacted at all to her nudity. Things were definitely different with everyone's favorite substitute Shinigami. She turned to watch him leave once the shadows of the doorway concealed her. He appeared to be arguing with himself, though more probably arguing with Shiro.
"He'll be alright, Yoruichi." The soft voice of Byakuya broke through her thoughts. "That young man has more inner strength than the entire Gotei 13."
"Coming from you, Bya-bo, I believe it, but that doesn't mean that he deserves to have to use it. I can only imagine what kind of turmoil is going through that pretty orange head of his." She turned again, and looked up at her childhood friend, a little surprised that he wore none of the objects of his station. "When did you get here anyway?"
"A few moments before he left." As tight lipped as always, the Sixth's captain moved further into the Shoten.
Gathered around the low table was the group from earlier, though Renji had obviously accompanied his lover. The redhead and Rukia were in the middle of a heated argument about something or other that made Yoruichi's eyebrow raise. She met Kisuke's gaze and he shook his head from behind his fan. Shinji similarly rolled his eyes and sucked his teeth.
"I don't care how stubborn or hard-headed he thinks he is! He's gotta learn ta lean on us." Renji huffed, crossing his arms over his broad chest. "Ya'd've thought he'd've learned that after the War. He doesn't always have ta be that high and mighty savior he keeps tryin' ta be."
"But this is very personal for him, baka!" Rukia smacked her lifelong friend across the head with a sketchbook that seemingly appeared from nowhere.
He ducked, rubbing the sore spot, "Oi! Wicked woman! Why would he rather be around you? Yer violent!"
Rukia looked quite satisfied, "Because he's known me longer. I'm sure he's—"
"Gone." Byakuya cut through his sister's rambling, and drew the attention of everyone in the room.
"He shouldn't be out there by himself." Shinji growled, glaring at the stoic brunette. "If there's a more stupid idea I can't come up with it. Especially at a time like this." The blonde made to stand up, but a hand on his arm held him in place.
The new object of Shinji's glare waved his fan in front of his face. "Shinji-koi, perhaps his instincts are just as refined as yours?"
"So? He's a Beta! A newly mated Beta! How do we know if he even knows?" Shinji was grasping at straws, but everything within him told him that his packmate should not be out there alone without his mate. His inner hollow screamed that he should go and cloister the younger Visored so nothing would happen to him. Only the touch of his own current mate kept his instincts in check. Mate versus packmate always won out in the end.
Oblivious to the internal struggle between the blondes, the rest watched as the tension in Shinji's frame was exhaled in a single irritated snort. "Fine, but so help me if something happens I'll let Shiro go feral on you, Kissu."
The shopkeeper, and Twelfth division captain, fluttered his fan to cover the paling of his features. He chuckled as though the threat was empty, and took a drink of his tea. Both of them ignored the confusion from the three Shinigami visitors.