"It's about your dad." Henry looked up at that. He had a feeling that whatever his mother was going to say that it wasn't going to be good. He could tell things were bad between his mother and dad for a while, and while it made Henry sad to admit to himself, he felt safer when daddy wasn't around. He approached his mother slowly before climbing into her lap needing to feel her near to chase away his lingering fears.
"What about daddy mommy?" Henry asked innocently as he stared up into his mother's eyes. He could just see the beginning of tears in her eyes and it hurt Henry to see his mother sad. He wished he could take her pain away because he loved his mother and her happiness was important to him. He reached up slowly to touch her face; the remaining hint of JJ's still healing bruise finally catching his attention. "Did daddy do that?" The innocence and sadness in Henry's voice caught JJ by surprise she shyly pulled away from her son's sight of view.
"Henry…" She started shakily. She didn't know how to answer the question without painting Will in a bad light and hurting Henry more. Despite the recent happenings between her and Will, and her still not willing to forgive him for any of it, there was a part of her that was still hesitant to completely shut Will out of her life forever. They shared a son, and like she told Derek about a week or so ago, Will and Henry still had some good times. She would not deny Henry the right to see his father as long as Will proved not to be a danger to her son. Right now, Will just seemed angry at her and to her knowledge, has never done anything to endanger Henry. JJ was still willing to give their relationship a chance as long as Henry desired to be so, but the moment he wanted nothing to do with Will, he would be gone from both of their lives forever.
"Henry…" She began again, not willing to lie to her son, "Your father and I have been having issues lately and one of our recent arguments got out of hand. It was an accident and he didn't mean it." JJ could feel the lie rolling off her tongue as her mind flashed back to Will forcing himself on top of her. That could have ended far differently then it did and JJ couldn't stop the shiver that made it's way through her body at the thought of what Will might have done to her if he had gotten his way. Henry's eyes widened as he felt the shiver go through his mother and immediately he knew that his mother was lying.
"Daddy hurt you?" His voice was colored with disbelief but Henry's mind assaulted him with memories of his parents' loud voices, of the one time he walked in to see his dad pushing his mother against the wall, her eyes filled with fear. "He hurt you." He said with a certainty and weariness that did not suited a young boy.
"Henry!" JJ exclaimed with surprise. She felt horrible knowing she couldn't protect her child from ugly truth of what their life had become. She had become one of those parents of broken relationship; a broken home where it was quite possible that this will have everlasting negative ramifications for her son. While she knew anything could happen in any situation and there were a lot of children out there suffering a hard upbringing, to know that she had one of those homes broke her heart. Her baby deserved better than this. She leaned forward to kiss Henry's forehead in acquiescence to his statement holding him tighter to her.
"I'm so sorry baby."
Henry could head the tears on her voice and his mind niggled at him in guilt. He began to ask hesitantly, the sting of tears burning his eyes, "Was it…?" His voice choked, the tears in his throat. "Was it because of me? Did he hurt you because of me?" His voice rang our brokenly. The weight of the world on his shoulders at the responsibility at being the center of is mother's pain.
JJ pulled back in shock at Henry's words, "What? Henry, sweetheart no! It is not your fault." She leaned in back toward him to get her point across. She cursed Will for creating this mess they were all in. She was happy with him, they were happy together and then he just went and fucked it all up for nothing. She was angry now and JJ could feel her earlier rage at Will's actions come hurtling back to the surface. She swallowed shakily trying to beat it back, not wanting Henry to pick up on it. She would deal with Will another time. She focused back on her son before continuing, "None of this is your fault, do you understand me?" She asked gently but sternly, imparting the sincerity and importance of the statement. She wanted Henry to be free of guilt and to not let his mind be weighted with responsibilities he shouldn't be concerned with.
JJ waited for him to nod in understanding before continuing, "Remember Henry, I promised to be honest with you as much as I can about things that are changing in our lives?" She waited for him to nod again before taking a deep breath, "Okay, good. I need you to be a big boy and let mommy get through everything first before you ask questions okay?" She paused again waiting for another nod. She sighed in relief when Henry gave, her son much more mature than his young years stated. She looked around his room for a second, trying to think of how she could explain the situation in a way that he could understand. She took a deep breath before staring him back in the eyes, "The reason that I wanted to talk about you dad, is to tell you that because of all our arguments, your dad and I decided to not be together anymore. Henry…" She said in deterrent as his mother opened in question. He immediately closed it before nodded his head in assent to continue.
"What I want you to understand is that while your dad and I are no longer together, it doesn't mean we don't both love you with all of our hearts. We're still a family no matter what; your dad and I just don't…" she paused looking for the right word to describe what happened between Will and her. "We just don't love each other anymore." She finished quietly. She took a deep breath before continuing, "What I'm trying to say is even though your dad and I are not together anymore, it does not mean that you don't get to have a relationship with your dad. Spend time with him and stuff…" She finished lamely. She hated how that sounded coming out of her mouth and she worried if Henry understood what she was saying. "Do you understand bud?" She asked wearily, not sure she could find a better way to explain. This whole evening was fraying with her nerves and she wanted to end soon.
She looked beseechingly at her son and waited for his response, "You don't love daddy anymore?" He asked quietly and there was shake in Henry's voice that made JJ frown in concern.
"Henry?" She asked quietly, pushing him to make his question clearer.
"Do you still love me?" JJ winced her eyes closed tightly. All Henry heard was that his dad and his mom broke up and they don't love each other anymore. He didn't believe her when she said she loved him.
She squeezed him to her chest again as she spoke, "Henry I said before and I'm saying it again. I will always love you no matter what."
Henry pushed away from her, "How can you love me if you don't love daddy anymore? Didn't you say a part of me is daddy, if you don't love him then you can't love me!" Henry shouted angrily.
JJ's eyes widened in horror, the conversation taking a complete turn. She didn't expect such an outburst from Henry, normally mild-tempered and for a second JJ could see so much of Will in her son that it scared her half to death. "Henry!" She shouted back before continuing on, "The parts of you that are Will are the parts of your father that I loved. I'm just not in love with him anymore, but that doesn't mean that I don't love you. I could never not love you." JJ said vehemently hoping that Henry would understand but she had a feeling that at such a young age, a boy couldn't tell the difference between maternal love and romantic love, right now to him, it was all the same.
Henry pushed his way out of her arms, "Lies! I don't believe you!" He shouted angrily, finally twisting his way out his mother's hold. Tears were rushing down his face at the idea of his mother not loving him anymore. "If you don't love daddy you can't love me!" He said forcefully. JJ couldn't stop the tears rushing down her face at Henry's words. She could understand his confusion and wanted to find another way to explain but no words could come to mind as she watched the rage continue to color Henry's face.
"Henry, please." She begged brokenly, trying once more for her baby, hoping he would allow her to console him and better explain but Henry continued to pull away from her not willing to go into her arms. She hurt him and he wanted her to know it. He hated his father for hurting his mother, for making her stop loving him and in turn making her stop loving her son. He wanted to despair at the loss of his mother, Henry blind to see her trying to reach for him. He was so mad at the situation and he was mad at himself and in that moment he wanted to lash out so Henry screamed.
JJ's heart broke as she took in her son's appearance. His face was red and swollen with tears, his nose was running and his chest heaved from heavy, short breaths. His eyes were filled with so much anger that JJ could almost feel his stare piercing through her body like daggers. Everything was going so terribly wrong. She watched as Henry's hands clenched into tight fists; his body shaking from his outburst of emotions. JJ could tell that what was coming next was going to break her in ways she couldn't possibly understand and she felt another part of herself shatter with the impending explosion. She flinched in apprehension when she saw Henry's mouth open.
"GET OUT! I hate dad! And I hate you!" JJ reeled back as if slapped across the face. Henry continued to cry and scream endlessly, his words ringing in JJ's ears, hear heart shattering at his vicious words. JJ had never felt such pain and she struggled to find a way to fix it but knew that while Henry was like this there was no getting through to him. She still tried one last time to reach for him, only to have him slap her hands away and continued to scream for her to get out of his room. JJ was to tired and defeated to fight him as she rose slowly and turned to leave his room. The slamming of his bedroom door behind her back making her ears ring as his cries continued to pierce the surrounding silence of the house. She collapsed back against the wall next to Henry's door before sliding down to the ground in a weakened slump. She couldn't stop the sobs from wracking her body as she continued to listen to her baby cry through the door.
Tears blinded her as she tried to find her phone in one of her pockets. She almost sighed in relief, her body shaking violently from hiccups that plagued her, as she felt it in her back pocket. She pulled it out and thought for a second to call her mother but she knew that there was only one person that could help her right now, more importantly, only one person she wanted to help her right now and she didn't hesitate any longer as she dialed his number. She shakily held the phone to her ear as she waited for Morgan to answer. After the third ring she heard his voice come through the phone, "Hey baby." He greeted lovingly making JJ gasped as another set of sobs started to make their way through her frame. She couldn't get a word out as she continued to cry on the phone in Derek's ear. "Jay, baby what's wrong?" Morgan's voice now filled with worry and concern.
"Derek…" Was all that JJ could gasp out in attempt to tell him what happened but she could only continue to cry as she held the phone loosely in her grasp.
"JJ, baby, I'm coming. You hear me? I'm coming right now, I'll be there soon. Wait for me!" JJ only nodded, unable to answer Derek right now; the hand holding the phone falling limply to her side, Morgan's voice still coming through the phone. "JJ, baby, I'm going to keep talking to you till I get there okay. Put me on speaker baby, I know you can do that. Put me on speaker babe." Morgan waited a bit as JJ blindly turned on the speakerphone. "I just need one word babe." He waited again.
"It's on." JJ stated weakly. The tears still coloring her voice.
"Good, now you don't need to say anything else. Just let me talk to you till I get there okay. I love you baby and I'm going to be there soon…" JJ leaned her head back against the wall as she tried to let Derek's voice chase away her tears and bring back her calm but she had a feeling it wouldn't really work until Derek was with her and she was in his arms.
"Derek…" She cut him off shakily, "hurry." The urgency in her voice could not be hidden and she knew that Derek could hear it clear as day.
"Okay, I'll be there soon. Ten minutes baby, ten!" JJ could hear his breath quicken and she knew now that Derek was now running. "I'm coming Jay, I'm coming."
JJ leaned her head back again and closed her eyes as she continued to listen to Derek rush to her.
A/N: So here's the next chapter. Like I promised I'm going to try and get at least one chapter out a week. I know this one is shorter than the last but I wanted to have JJ and Henry to be the focus of this chapter and while I know it didn't end well right now I'm sure they'll work it out eventually. Lol. I'll try and get the next one out soon. Please review, they're great motivation to get chapters out there! As always love you all!