Chapter 15

I recovered quickly and whipped around, teeth bared, claws unsheathed. But these cats weren't just some rouges, or band of loners.

Peachstar, his muzzle grizzled with age, repeated, "Beechpaw, is that you?"

Stunned, I couldn't answer. My jaw hung open still, because not only was the leader of the clan I'd left behind standing less than a tail length away, but what seemed like half the clan was matching my expression. We stood in awkward awkwardness, but soon heard another cat's voice, my mother's, Whiterain.

"I-Is that really you?"

I saw her pushing through the five or six cats staring at me, slowly and cautiously, as though StarClan itself put me here. And for all I know, maybe they did.

She suddenly picked up her gate and rushed to me, licking my fur in every wrong direction. "My kit! My kit! My only, precious kit. Oh, I missed you! Where have you been? Why did you disapear?!"

Seriously?

"Why?...I-"

"She left because of you."

I turned again,( My back and neck were serioulsy starting to hurt, now.) to see Scourge. Scourge and a few menacing looking cats with matching collars. By that, I mean each and every one of them were studded with bones and teeth.

"She left because you couldn't take care of her. She left because you didn't care about her. She left, because none of you understood."

Oh, no.

I looked back over my clan, who looked confused at this sudden mood change. I didn't see Fawnpaw or Lilypaw, who were probably warriors by now. But I did see Bloodfur, who seemed on the more...hostile side. As usual.

Whiterain bristled at the accusation, and hissed, "What would you know about taking care of anyone?"

Scourge immediately retaliated, "More than you."

My mother turned to Peachstar, "We should leave before any cats stir up trouble."

He hesitated and gave the situation a look over, then asked me, "Beechpaw, what were you doing out here? You disappearing like that, well, we... We assumed a loner or rouge had harmed you."

He could've just said 'we thought you were dead and did nothing to try and find you'. It would've felt no different.

I couldn't stop myself from meowing, "Like you would care."

Whiterain flinched, and I felt a little guilty. But why should I? It's not my fault I left, I had been basically ignored because of Lilypaw's lies.

I continued before he tried to deny anything, "I left because I'm not a clan cat- it doesn't suite me. I can't ever do anything right, even when I try."

As I spoke, I felt the fur along my spine fluff up a little, restating my past was assisting my mood. "But that's okay, because I'm done trying. I don't care what you think, or what anybody thinks. I belong here, with my clan. where I belong."

Bloodfur suddenly growled, "You call this mangy group of overgrown rats a clan?"

One of Scourge's friends hissed. I didn't blame him, Bloodfur got on my nerves just as much.

Suddenly Peachstar stepped forward, and I heard a stone rattle as Scourge leapt to my defense. He stood back, though, and just put a paw out in front of my chest, warning Peachstar with a low, quiet growl.

"You really don't know, do you?" Peachstar's soft tone had my attention. He stepped closer.

"We know what Lilypaw did. She came to me and told me, she apologized for her lies. Her intentions weren't serious, please understand. We want you back, more than you can imagine. You belong in the forest, with Starclan guiding your paws and clan mates to protect you all the way."

You can trust me. You can trust us."

"Trust you?!" My rage finally bubbled over. "You wouldn't ever trust me! How dare you act like everything will be okay, when I finally belong somewhere? You want to just, take all this away from me?"

"You haven't seen what these cats can do. They have no mercy, they won't protect you when it matters most. No warrior code binds them together, no justice, no sacrifice! They only care about what they get, not who has to suffer for it."

I thought back to when Scourge killed that tom for trespassing, I remember it so clearly. Had he really taught these cats to do worse things?

I looked at him again, the cat I'd trusted with my life multiple times, and suddenly felt a shadow of doubt. He killed a cat, almost killed me, and not to mention, just left me to make a huge decision that would affect my life forever.

It's pretty obvious what I should choose, but for those of you who know me, I'm stubborn and unreasonable at the worst of times. Like now. I closed my eyes and took a deep breath. I tried to calm down some, this was impossibly familiar- but there's no running away now. No time to just give up an let cats assume what they want.

I had to do this.

I have to choose.

"Scourge, have you ever loved me? Is what he says true?" I struggled to keep calm. When he didn't answer, I continued, and ignored a few gasps from our audience.

"Would you protect me, even when there are no chances of winning? Even if you were guaranteed to...die?"

I kept my eyes closed, I don't think I could stand seeing his expression. He meowed, "Are you considering leaving?"

I hesitated, then turned to him. "Yes."

A silence that seemed to stretched forever engulfed us, and for a moment, the moon was blocked out by clouds.

"No Beechpaw, I won't protect you."

My heart literally froze at that moment, I could feel it like a stone in my chest, weighing me down, causing me to question my breathing.

"If you're even considering leaving, I can't. You've betrayed my trust, after we had something, no matter how faint. It was there. You don't deserve my protection."

I stood still, allowing no emotion to show through.

I turned back to my leader, and mewed, "Let's go."

Peachstar, a little suprised by my sudden change of heart, looked at Scourge once more, and hissed, "See you tomorrow, and don't forget, we will have our answer."

Scourge narrowed his eyes, "I'll be waiting."