Converging Series Web Site: ~rpm/converging_series/
Ranma 2096 Web Site: .ca/~ Childra Jansen's subpage: .ca/~ Hibiki Zannen's subpage: .ca/~ -
ConSer Editor's Preface:
Well now, what to say...
Trisha's always been on my to-read list, and having her write up a story for Converging Series was something that pleasantly surprised me (and had me worried, remind me to tell you kids about the Converging Series Curse some time).
As for the subjects she writes, wella...
Every 'epic' story usually has the hero, the villain, the crisis, and the romance.
Ishido and Childra are that romance.
Readers of Converging Series often ask us what we plan to do with the pair,
since there is a distinct possibility that these lovebirds may be torn apart by the ol' sea of time.
Well, this story answers that, I suppose.
It also meets the base needs of man in several ways.
1) It features a lesbian relationship. A lot of men, myself included, find that sort of thing darn irresistible.
2) It's got the younger man/older woman angle going. You folks ever stop and think about how old Childra really is? Or how young Ishido is? Slight oedipal complex on his part? Mmmmmmmmaybe.
3) It's got the older woman/younger woman angle going. See (1) for any further notes.
Ah. Right. Okay, by now I guess I've set you all up to think that this is one big lemon orgy-fest.
Aheh, sorry, no. n.n;;;
But it's about people, folks. It's about the heart of the matter, when all the fighting and adventuring and all that are done, and you're faced with a future of question marks.
I just love those kinda stories, don't you?
-rod
R2096 Editor's Preface:
This story already has its opening and ending quotes, but I'll add my own 'Editor's Preface Quote':
"Never fall in love with a bisexual. It will only give you indigestion."
-From the movie 'Costa Brava'.
Words to live by, especially if the one falling in love is monosexual and unaware of the other's inclinations. Childra Jansen has had it rather easy so far, as romantic triangles go. She's popped into another dimension,
found a young (VERY young) lover, and had a few enjoyable moments, but nothing lasts, and sometime, soon, she's going to have to make a choice.
In 1996 ConSer Nerima, she's found Ishido Takashima - young, sweet, straight and occasionally psychotic. In R2096's 2096, she's left Zannen Hibiki - the swashbuckling head of the Exploratory History department at U of Tokyo, and a lesbian. Both her lovers are intensily monogamous and monosexual, and unaware that Childra is neither.
How to make the choice? Or must there be a choice? Trisha deals wonderfully with the inner workings of Miss Jansen's mind in the following short story.
Enjoy!
-Chris Willmore ============================================================================ _ _ _ _ _ _ _
\_ | | | _| | | | | | | | | \
\ |- | | | _ |_| | | | | | | | | |_| | | _ | | || | | | | | \ | |- /_ | | || | | _/ |_ | \_|_ |_ _/ _|_ | \| |_|
-
_ _ _ _ /
| \ | \ . | \ | |. / \_/ \ | \ \ / \
| | \ \ | | \ \ .| | | |.| | | | \ \ / \ \ /
| | / / | | | |\ | |.| | | |.| | | |\ / \
| | \ \ .| | | |.| |..\ |.| |.| |.| | | | /| | \ |_|. \_\ |_|. .|_|.|_|...\/..|_|.|_|.|_|.|_|. \|_| \ /\ \ /
Created by Christopher Willmore. / \ \ /
4cw6 .ca / / \/
Based on a story by Rumiko Takahashi and /
Developed by C. Michael Schumacher / /
R2096 pages: .ca/~4cw6/ \/(Logo:Armakuni)
============================================================================ Childra & Ishido: In Her Wildest Dreams A Converging Series side story by Trisha L. Sebastian ============================================================================
[Childra Jansen, Zannen Hibiki and the Exploratory History department are creations of Chris Willmore. Ishido/Lobishomem belongs to Kevin Eav. They are being used with permission.]
[The Ranma Universe is being used without permission. Please don't sue me.
In addition, this side story goes between Act 5 and Act 6 of the Converging Series.]
"Blimey. I'm shagging a lesbian."
"Do I get a prize?"
-Garth Ennis
Childra and Ishido turned away from the window that Happosai flew out of and the blue blaze of light that burned into their retinas.
"Do you think he's gonna make it alright to ... wherever he's going?" Ishido asked, his eyes scanning the scattered magical instruments and the women's underwear around the room.
Childra shrugged, "It doesn't matter right now." She threw her arms around Ishido and hugged him tightly. "What matters is that now that he's gone, we can concentrate on us!" She gave him a seductive look and her lips closed in on his-
"What in the world just happened here?" Childra and Ishido whirled around guiltily.
Miyabi stood in the doorway, her hands on her hips. At the moment, she looked so much like the Akane she remembered from the future that Childra couldn't help but grin. She hugged Ishido tighter to her. "I was about to give my Lobishomem a great big hug for saving my life!"
Ishido turned bright red and Miyabi couldn't help but beam at seeing at least one couple who could get along together. Childra tugged on Ishido's arm and drawing Miyabi aside with the other, she firmly closed the door on the old lech's room. She gave a knowing wink to both of them. "We best not stay too long; he might come back." Ishido frowned and Childra inwardly shuddered, remembering Happosai's grimy hands all over her breasts.
"So," she asked, walking arm in arm with them down the stairs, "have we missed dinner?"
Childra snuggled up comfortably against Ishido's shoulder as they walked down the street back to Ucchan's. She had finished her dinner with a satisfied sigh. No matter what kinds of technology the twenty-first century had to offer, nothing, just nothing could beat Kasumi's cooking. She would have to remember to tell that to Zannen when she got back-
Childra frowned. Go back? Did she have to go back? She was having a wonderful time in the twentieth century, finally figuring out if her theories about this era were correct. She loved talking to Akane, seeing her instead of seeing right through her. She loved eating at Ucchan's,
loved wandering around Nerima, loved everything. She could do what ever she wanted to do in this timeline and when it was all over, she could go back home without any ill effects to the time stream.
Ryo Saotome had no clue about what he was talking about. Even though he was the one who had brought them all together in this parallel time stream, he had no clue about how the actual mechanics of time travel worked. She, on the other hand, knew everything. She was taught by the best.
Childra thought back to the first time she came back from a trip through the EH's 'time machine'. She was studying Darwin's voyages through the Galapagos, hoping to finish her research on him for her thesis. She came back flushed and excited. What a darling man he was.
Happily, she floated out of the changing room. Her notes were tucked away in her bandolier, her *private* notes. Her new insights on Darwin would change everything they knew about him. She was so lost in euphoria that she didn't notice the woman blocking her path until it was too late.
"Oh, I'm sorry, ma'am..." Childra's voice trailed off when she noticed who the woman was. "Director Hibiki, I didn't mean to run into you like that."
The woman nodded her head in a regal fashion. "No harm done. Tell me, Ms.
Jansen, did you enjoy your trip?"
Childra grinned. "I loved it! The clothes, the people, Darwin... Every thing was so fabulous. I only wish that I could have had more time there.
There's so many things I left unfinished." Like her tryst with Darwin.
"The twenty-minute limit *is* a pain, isn't it?" There was a hint of a smile on the director's lips. "Nonetheless, I've found time can be quite flexible... in the right hands."
"Directress?"
The smile was now full-grown, lazy and feral. "Call me Zannen, and we can discuss this some more tomorrow when you report to my office."
"Yes, Dir- Zannen."
Zannen. Funny, for all the time that she had spent in the past (or an alternate version of the past) she had not thought of her lover once.
Childra used to be scared of her. The technicians and all the other EH operatives called her "the ice queen" and other names that referred to her antecedents and sexual preference. But after that meeting in her office and dinner later on, she realized that the icy facade hid a tender woman, who had to keep up the facade to get her way in the world.
Zannen wasn't an ice queen. She was the pirate queen without a ship. She once wore a costume one Halloween, a red silk blouse knotted at the waist,
tight black shorts slashed at the knees and calf high black leather boots.
She was the hit of the EH party, with her gold hoop earings and a real 15th century Spanish cutlass she had belted to her hip. She was all fire that night, charming all the male executives, then laughing in their faces when she had rebuffed their advances. Her Zannen. And later that evening, when they had tumbled into bed, Zannen was all ice, raising goosebumps on her flesh with her cool kisses driving her insane with her methodical slowness until she couldn't take anymore. Zannen had undone her completely that night. Much as Ishido had with his shy tenderness...
Ishido stopped and stared down at her. Childra was completely silent, her eyes drawn and her mouth twisted into a sad smile. He blessed the heavens every moment when he saw her. Ishido felt that if she asked him to run a marathon, then fight a hundred warriors, all while balancing an egg vertically on a spoon held between his teeth, he would cheerfully ask where they kept the eggs. He didn't think that there should be anything in this world that should hurt her. But she seemed so strong, so self-sufficient that he didn't think that there was anything wrong. She told him that she was his; she told him that she would stay. So when he nudged her with his shoulder and asked her what was wrong, he was expecting to see her smile brightly at him, assure him everything was alright and banish the small well of fear that started to spring up in his stomach.
Childra turned towards him with a smile and said, "Hey, Lobis, I've got a good idea. Instead of going to Ucchan's tonight, why don't we go someplace else? Somewhere secluded and romantic." She smiled again, grabbing onto his arm tightly. "Let's try one of those love hotels that I used to read about."
Ishido gulped. "Love hotels?" He blushed to his eyebrows and Childra laughed. She pushed against his shoulder and gave him a quick kiss on the cheek. She fluttered her eyelashes and smiled, "For me?"
Ishido swallowed back the lump in his throat. How could he ever refuse her?
He nodded and Childra smiled, pumping her arm and shouting, "Yatta!" She dragged him off to a phone booth. "There's this one I read about when I was back home. It's supposed to be near here..." Ishido smiled as Childra yammered on and on about the hotel, not noticing the brief flare of pain in her brown eyes.
Ishido was still blushing by the time they reached the hotel. He stared at the menu of choices. Each room had a picture of what it looked like, with a key box underneath. He recoiled in horror from the picture of a certain room with pink frilly sheets, a heart-shaped bed and a disco ball. Childra's eyes followed his gaze and she laughed. "Is that you're style, Lobis?"
He shook his head rapidly and she gushed, "But it's so cute! And I just adore that disco ball!" He gave her a stern look and intoned, "We are not going there."
Childra shrugged. Then her eyes fell on a room with dark paneling and a Victorian bed. She tapped it thoughtfully with her forefinger. "Do you like that one?" she asked him.
Ishido shrugged. Now that they were actually here, he was starting to feel uneasy about the idea. "Whatever is fine with you is fine with me. I trust you, Childra."
Childra beamed at him. She grabbed the keys out of the hole and tugged him in the direction of the hotel. Laughing, she tugged him up the stairs,
briskly opened up the door and shoved him in. Locking it behind her, she leaned back against it dramatically and said huskily, "Now, finally, we're alone together." Slowly and deliberately, she pulled out the neck- line of her shirt and dropped the key in.
Ishido gulped. "What are you doing?"
"Well," she said, stalking towards him with a predatory gleam in her eye, "I get the distinct feeling that you don't want to be here. So, I'm gonna let you go."
"And?" Ishido knew by now that with Childra there would always be some sort of condition attached to any offer that she had to make. Especially if it concerned him, her, and a private hotel room.
"Well," she said, drawing the word out and trailing a finger up his arm,
"you can leave *if* you can get the key."
"The key?" Ishido gulped again, looking down at her chest, then back up at her face.
"Yep." There was a whole lot of meaning placed into that small little word.
Childra laughed as she saw Ishido reach for her arm, then pull away hesitantly.
"What's the matter, Lobis? Afraid of a little cleavage?" she taunted him,
circling him like a shark does a bloody hunk of meat in the water.
"I'm not afraid," he said, watching her out of the corner of his eye.
"Oh, really?" she stated, hugging him from behind. He could feel her breasts press up against him, and the metal of the key digging into his back.
Ishido grinned. "Really." With a lightning quick motion, he reached over his shoulder and bending slightly, he flipped her over his back and into his arms. Surprised, Childra saw the wolfish grin on his face as he carried her off to the bed. He tossed her onto it and pounced next to her.
Childra's eyes glittered with excitement as he kissed her, his passion burning into her lips. He quickly made short work of her clothing and his and dropping the key onto the nightstand, they made love under the Victorian canopy.
Childra awoke with a start, and found herself alone in the large bed. Zannen was nowhere to be found. Blinking back sleep, Childra swung her legs out of the bed, nearly hitting her head on the canopy, and got up, searching for her slippers. She pushed back the heavy drapes that concealed their apartment windows and blinked out at the morning sun. All of Tokyo lay spread out in front of her, the university a large white span of land to her right. If she squinted, she could see the EH offices in the distance. Is that where Zannen had gone?
She dressed quickly, gulping down a glass of orange juice from the refrigerator and took the stairs down two at a time. People jostled about her as they went to work, to school. Getting her bearings, she pushed her way in the opposite direction of the stream of commuters and towards the EH offices.
The fact that Zannen did not wake up beside her bothered her a bit. Usually Zannen was loathe to wake up when she could sleep in. Usually, while Childra dressed and showered, Zannen would have prepared breakfast for the two of them before they went about their business, Childra to classes,
Zannen to... whatever. But Zannen was not in their bed. Childra had woken up alone.
In no time at all, Childra found herself in the lobby of the EH building.
The receptionist who usually greeted her with a smile was replaced by a dour young man who bore a strange resemblance to Ryo Saotome. Ryo Saotome? Where did that name come from?
She found her way to the Directress' office, and knocked hesitantly. No answer. She yanked hard on the door latch and it wouldn't budge. Panic rising in the back of her throat, she clawed and hammered at the door, until it finally opened from the inside. A man looked down at her with familiar green eyes. "Childra!" he exclaimed.
Childra stumbled back, and the man grabbed her by the arm and pulled her inside. The man dragged her to a chair and pushed her into it. Then,
turning slowly in front of her, he asked, "Well, what do you think?"
"Huh? What do I think of what? Who are you?"
The man smiled a feral grin. "What, don't you recognize me? It's me,
Zannen."
Zannen? Childra could only stare as he strutted up to her and sat on the edge of the desk. "You're the one who wanted me to do this, remember?" he smiled, legs swinging back and forth.
"Do what?" Childra whispered in a small voice.
"Be a man, after all, that's what you really want, isn't it?" Suddenly his (her?) voice turned cold. "I know about him, I know all about him, your little play toy in the 20th century."
Childra's heart stopped, and Zannen continued, his wide smile reminding her of shark's teeth. "So, I took the liberty of going back to wherever he was and killing him. I stopped at Jusenkyo, too." He placed a hand on her,
squeezing her bicep painfully. "Now you can have your cake and 'eat' it too." Laughing softly, he moved in to kiss her, pointed teeth dripping with blood-
Childra awoke with a start. Ishido still slept beside her, his breathing deep and regular. Impulsively, she latched on to him, hugging him deeply.
He stirred and slowly sat up.
"Oh, Ishido, I'm so glad to be here with you!" she murmured into his back,
pressing kisses against it. Ishido said nothing, but instead swung his legs out of bed and gathering his clothing, he went to the bathroom and locked the door.
Childra stared after him in amazement. What was wrong with him today? She dressed in silence, her fingers fumbling with her blouse and bandolier.
Settling a dagger on her hip, she rapped on the bathroom door. "Come out,
Lobis? Don't you want to play with me?"
The door slammed back open and Ishido stalked out. "Ready." It was less of a question than it was a declaration. Confused, Childra followed Ishido out the hotel and back down towards the Tendo dojo. Childra tried to grab his arm, but he shook her off and continued on. "What's wrong?" she asked, a worried expression on her face.
"It's nothing you can fix..." Ishido's voice trailed away into a word that sounded like...
"What did you call me?" Childra placed both hands on his chest.
"Nothing more than what you deserve." Ishido walked on resolutely towards the dojo, Childra following in his wake.
When they got to the dojo, Ryo Saotome was there, a jubilant expression on his face. "I finally figured it out!" he crowed. "We can all go back home!" He held up the locket, and a blue portal sprung up in front of them.
As if from nowhere, Miyabi, Ratiko and Gosling emerged from the house and disappeared into the portal, and Ishido stepped forward as well.
"Ishido! Where are you going?" she cried as she grabbed his arm. "Don't leave me!"
"I have to," he said in a dull tone. "I can't stand to be near you any longer."
What? Childra recoiled from him and he shook her hand free. From the portal, Zannen appeared, her green eyes smiling at Childra. She crossed to her and enfolded her in a loving embrace.
Ishido turned away. "I know, I know all about her, your dyke lover. She came to me and told me all about you two. She told me that we could all live together happily. I'd rather kill myself first. I'm leaving."
"But Ishido! I thought you loved her?" Zannen called out, Childra squirming in her grasp.
Ishido stalked towards them, his eyes turning black and soulless. "After she lied to me? Used me as a sex toy? And you has the nerve to suggest I'd want to be the third member in a twisted threesome?" He spat in her face.
"You make me sick, you whore."
No! Childra screamed as he ran into the blue-black portal, the mists swirling around him as Zannen held her tightly, Childra's tears streaming down her face, remembering the look in his black, black eyes-
Childra woke up with a start. Immediately, she felt the bed to the right of her, then to the left. She was not alone. Sitting up, she breathed a sigh of relief, then bent over to her right. Pushing back the covers, she leaned over and breathed softly, "Time to wake up, Ishido."
He mumbled something, then went back to sleep. "Alright, time to bring out the big guns," Childra said aloud. She reached under the covers and gently raked her fingers over Ishido's left flank. He sat up abruptly, captured her hand in his and pushed her back onto the bed. "No tickling," he murmured to her. "You promised."
"That was last night," she giggled. "This is tomorrow!" Pouncing on him,
she brought both hands to bear, arrowing for his sides, as he tried to keep her still against the bed. Together, they rolled over to the left and bumped into something.
"Whazzzat?" Zannen muttered to herself, and lashed out with a kick, sending Childra and Ishido flying off the other side of the bed. Of course every action has its equal and opposite reaction, and Zannen learned this the hard way when she crashed onto the floor. She crawled to the Victorian bed, and pulling herself up, she angrily stalked over to the giggling, wriggling heap at the other end of the bed. "Keep it quiet! I'm trying to sleep!"
"Well, I think it's time you woke up then!" Childra grabbed Zannen by the ankles and tugged downwards, overbalancing her and toppling Zannen onto Ishido. Then, she leaped onto the pile, one hand tickling Zannen's back, the other Ishido's flank. They giggled and wrestled, tag-teamed and double-teamed, until they were tired, sweaty and flushed with happiness.
Finally, Zannen got up off the floor to make breakfast, Ishido took to the bathroom for a shower and Childra was left making the bed.
It was so good to have them all together like this. It was a good idea to bring the two loves of her lives into the same century and dimension so they could get a chance to meet each other and get to know one another. Frankly,
Childra was afraid at first that Zannen would want to kill Ishido, or that Ishido would want to leave her when he found out, but things turned out alright in the end. "Everything is perfect," Childra mused to herself.
"That's why you can tell this isn't real."
Childra whirled around, and her face turned hard. "You."
Childra Jansen sighed, and stepped out of the blue swirling portal. "I hate to be the bearer of bad news, honey, but none of this is real. It's just a dream."
"It may just be a dream, but it's the dream that I want!" Childra glared at her doppelganger, and the doppelganger stared back amusedly. "Why can't you leave us alone?"
"Because I'm you, sweetheart. I know just as well as you do what you want.
You want things to be perfectly happy, but it's not gonna happen." The doppelganger waved a hand, and an image of Ishido appeared. "It's true.
He'd hate you forever if he learned that you lied to him about your past."
Her other hand waved, and Zannen appeared. "And she *would* kill anyone who got between her and you. And then, she'd kill you." The double leaned against a bed post. "You've got a tough choice to make."
"But why do I have to choose? Why can't I have both?" Childra wailed, her eyes darting from Ishido to Zannen and back again.
"That's not the way the cosmos works. Usually, you only would have met one of them. You're cheating by having multiple lives. You have to choose."
The doppelganger looked at her watch. "Come on, time is slipping away."
Childra looked at Zannen, her first lover, the first one to truly trust her capabilities, to see her potential. Then, she saw Ishido, the man who showed her that she was a real woman, not a pale imitation of someone else.
Torn, between the two, she fell to the floor. "I can't."
"Too bad. Looks like I'll have to make the choice for you." In her double's hand glowed a wicked Tibetan dagger, a twin to the one Nutkin used to exorcise ghosts. She hefted it by the handle, then hurled it towards the two flickering images.
Childra screamed, then time seemed to slow down, as she rushed to intercept the dagger. She could see her double laughing, eyes glowing red, as her teeth became fangs. The dagger sliced through the air, charged with mystical energies, homing in on its target. Childra flung herself into the air, trying to push Zannen's shade aside, and felt a burning pressure in her chest. Looking down, she saw the dagger embedded in her chest, her heart pulsating around it, making the dagger twitch. She turned to see Ishido's shade look at her reproachfully as Zannen put her arms around her,
supporting her as she slumped to the floor and everything went black-
Childra woke up with a start. "No no no no noooooo!" she wailed, lurching up out of bed. Beside her, Ishido turned in his sleep, exposing a shoulder.
Impulsively, she kissed his shoulder, hugging him fiercely. "I'll never let you go," she whispered to him.
"Never let who go?" a voice questioned from the darkness. Childra whirled around and narrowed her eyes at a shrinking circle of blue light. "No, this is just a dream, this is just a dream," she muttered, still clutching Ishido's shoulder. He stirred in his sleep.
"Is it?" Zannen emerged from the darkness, wearing a severe business suit.
Her eyes glittered as she sat down next to Childra, who was shuddering on the bed. "You've been gone for a long time, love. Didn't you think I'd come looking for you?"
"But I saw you... you said you killed..." Childra gibbered, blinking through the tears that filled her eyes.
Zannen reached out to the younger woman, gathering her up in her arms and rocking her. She put one hand on her hair and kissed Childra's forehead.
"Me? Kill someone? You know I'd never do that."
Childra pulled back and her eyes narrowed. "Truly?"
Zannen laughed. "Okay, maybe I'd kill someone, but only if I had good reason. You know me, Childra, better than anyone. I need probable cause if I'm going to go on one of my rage sprees." She frowned when Childra pulled back and stood up. "What's wrong?"
"This is only a dream, I might as well tell you," she muttered. Childra gathered up her courage and took a deep breath. "What would you say if you found out that I was cheating on you?"
Zannen blinked. "And you're asking me this, because...?"
"Because I am."
Zannen took a look at Childra, peering into her eyes. "They're brown. Your eyes are brown."
"Of course they are, you've always known they were," Childra said impatiently.
"No, I mean they're brown *now*. Why did you take out your contact lenses?
I've always liked them on you." Zannen perused Childra's face, cupping her chin with one hand, turning her head from side to side.
"Stop it! This is serious. I'm having an affair... I've had affairs,"
Childra continued. She gestured to Ishido next to her.
Zannen chuckled. "If this is your idea of a joke..." Her voice trailed off as she realized that both Childra and the boy next to her were naked.
Childra gulped. "This is not a joke." She watched as a dozen emotions flitted across Zannen's face. Her lips tightened in anger, her jaw clenching as she stared at Ishido, her dark green eyes boring into hers.
"Why."
It was not a question. Childra pulled up the covers over Ishido and got up from the bed, Zannen following her to the window seat.
"I suppose you've been wondering where I've been." Zannen sat in stony silence. "Well, since you've found me, then I guess you know both where and when I've been and-"
"Why."
"I had just met up with Rat- Reiraku and we were going to go see if we could find another friend of ours, Kim Thompson." Childra peered at Zannen,
who was fiercely silent. "Then, out of nowhere, some boy appears in a flash of blue. He bumped into Reiraku and the both of them started to disappear."
"And you followed him."
Childra threw up her hands in disgust. "What else could I do? Did you honestly want your nephew to disappear in a time portal? Especially with how much he gets around on his own?" She watched Zannen's eyes soften when she mentioned Reiraku. "So I followed them, and met up with other time travelers, and we ended up here, in a universe where Ranma and Akane are still alive."
"And the boy."
"I'm getting to that part." Childra looked over at the bed where Ishido lay. "When I met him, I was just teasing him, trying to make the most of the time adventure I was going on. I mean the others were so concerned about time and its consequences, especially that Ryo Saotome." Zannen's eyes widened. "Yeah, he's a son of Ranma's from an alternate future. So while Miyabi was worrying about getting her parents together, and Reiraku was worrying about ensuring his future, and Ryo was worrying about repairing the time stream, I met Ishido."
"Who's he, another son of Ranma's?" Zannen asked, her voice cold.
"No, I'm not sure what place he has in his universe. He is in no way related to any of the Prime Mover families, as far as I can tell. He was just caught up in this mess, and I thought I could..." Childra's voice faltered.
"You thought you could have a good fuck with him, and screw whatever relationship you had back in your own time." Zannen said flatly.
"No! That's not it at all!" Childra cried. She grabbed Zannen's cold hands in her own. "I love you, Zannen."
Zannen laughed harshly. "You have a twisted way of showing it."
Childra clutched at Zannen's hands. "When I first met you, I was dazzled by you. By the idea of you, the power you held, your solitude, your compassion. And most importantly, by the trust you placed in me." She stared into Zannen's eyes, hoping to see a spark of sympathy, of pain, of anything but this dead coldness.
"You took me in, you soothed my fears, you taught me love, you gave me life... all the things that I've always wanted." She looked down at Zannen's hands. "All the things I've always needed. But never once did you let me show those things to you." Zannen inhaled sharply and Childra continued.
"Have you ever been so thoroughly frightened by anything? So frightened that you need to find someone to comfort you, to take you in her arms and hold you, and tell you everything's going to be alright?" She reached up a hand to Zannen's cheek. "So many times you've done that for me when I wake up from those nightmares I have. But I've never done that for you."
Zannen moved her lips and Childra placed a finger against them. "What about when we make love? Always you stalk me, tease me, thrill me... When do I get to do the same to you?"
Childra sighed. "In Ishido, I see very much the same person I used to be before I met you. Alone, afraid, lost. I wanted to give him what you give me and gradually I fell in love, both with him, and with the person I became in order to do it. I became you."
"Zannen, I don't know what's going to happen to me when I go back home, and I am going back home. I've changed so much since you've last seen me. I don't know if you're ever going to love me again, much less trust me after what I've done to you." She pulled her other hand out of Zannen's and cupped her face. "Zannen, I *do* love you, and I always will."
Zannen's green eyes softened, as she leaned forwards to kiss Childra.
And Childra woke up.
Ishido woke up with a start. He sensed that he was alone in the bed. A small panic rose in the back of his throat. "Childra?" he called out hesitantly. A small murmur answered him and he rose out of bed to join her at the window seat. "Is there anything wrong?"
Childra took a deep breath and smiled. "No, nothing's wrong. Everything's great." She hugged him closely to her, clinging to him. Tenderly, he put his arms around her and caressed her cheek. Her eyes were puffy, like she'd been crying. Ishido felt a shiver of alarm. "Are you sure you're okay?"
Childra nodded, and buried her face into his shoulder. Ishido patted her on her back. "Come on, let's get out of here," he said, and sniffling, she nodded. As he pulled back, he noticed something different about her. It bugged him while she made the bed, and when they checked out of the hotel.
It wasn't until they reached the Tendo dojo that he realized what it was.
Childra's eyes were green again.
-
"It is very stupid, really, to run off and leave a perfectly kind and sympathetic man. ...to run off with no understanding at all of his true feelings, with no purpose other than to attract attention and hope to upset him-it is an unplesant sort of memory to have to live with."
-Lady Murasaki, in 'The Tale of Genji'
============================================================================ THE END ============================================================================
AUTHOR'S NOTES:
8-5-98: For some strange reason I like Childra Jansen. She intrigues me.
How did a woman with so much spirit, so much lust for live end up with a namby-pamby like Ishido? Not that I don't like him, but frankly, I'm too much of a Zannen fan to like him. I'm instantly drawn to strong female characters, (being female myself ^_^) and Chris Willmore's visions of strong women fascinated me so much that I decided to risk the Converging Series curse and get involved in this little enterprise. Any comments about this story can be sent to me at sebast5228 and all flames will be sent to Skeride, so she can hunt you down and exorcise your ghost.
Trisha L. Sebastian tls Proud Member of the BML Productions Crew
============================================================================