Disclaimer: I don't own Naruto
Sorry that last chapter sucked, here's a hopefully better one.
I'll try to update Truth or Dare soon.
Oh, and did I misuse teme and dobe last chapter?
Warning, perverted humor in this chapter.
EDIT: Damn, I wrote Sai instead of PH.
...
Sai's Interview Story
PH: For today's guest, we have with us today, Tsunade, Kakashi, Gai, Kurenia, and Shizune. We tried to get Anko in, but she says she doesn't share the spotlight, hopefully she'll join us some day though.
Tsunade: Enough about Anko, I don't have all day, so let's get this over with.
PH: Okay, first of, how old are you really? And how ugly do you look with out your disguise?
Tsunade: What the (Bleep)? Who taught you your manners kid? I outta have the ANBU execute you on the spot.
PH: Eep, it was just a question, everyone wants to know!
Tsunade: Tell me...who is everyone?
PH: Nobody.
Tsunade: Tell me now or I'll (Bleep) your (Bleep)!
PH: It was Sai, he asked me to do it!
Tsunade: Shizune, remind me to kill Sai.
Shizune: Good one Tsunade... you are joking right?
Tsunade: Maybe.
PH: Okay, Tsunade. You were on the same squad as Orochimaru when you were younger. Did he ever show any interest in girls?
Tsunade: Orochimaru? Showing interest in girls? He's as straight as the leaf Symbol on a Konoha headband.
PH: So he's gay?
Tsunade: Why do you think he wanted Sasuke so badly?
PH: Well, we've all heard rumors, but we were coming to you for conformation.
Tsunade: Well I confirm it. Orochimaru's is gay He used to hit on Jiraiya all the time.
PH: Really? Tell me more!
Tsunade: Well, once, we were on a mission, e were short on sleeping bags, so he tried to share one with Jiraiya!
PH: That doesn't really sound that gay.
Tsunade: Later on we found out that Orochimaru hid one of the sleeping bags on purpose.
PH: Now that sounds gay.
Kakashi: Excuse me? Do you have any questions for me? There's a new Icha Icha out and I'd like to spend some quality time with my hand.
PH: I did not need to hear that!
Kakashi: Can I go now?
PH: No. I want to know why the (Bleep) you're so (Bleep)ing obsessed with (Bleep)ing Sasuke! You ignore Naruto and Sakura just so you canhang out with Sasuke. Are you some sort of gay pedo with a thing for him.
Kakashi: Not at all, he just reminds me of my friend Obito...Obito is dead.
PH: You know, there's like a forty percent chance that Tobi is actually Obito being possessed by Uchiha Madara who is also the Mizukage?
Kakshi: What!? Obi-kunm, I'm coming.
-Dashes off-
PH: I bet he used to say that all the time.
Shizune: Ewwww...do you even know how young they were back then.
PH: What, Obito seems like the kind of person who would always need kakashi's help. And Kakashi would probably tease him about it.
Shizune: Oh..that's what you meant.
PH: What did you think I meant?
Kurenia: If this is how its going to be, I'm leaving.
PH: Oh no you're not. You don't get to go until we ask about the baby. What are you going to name it?
Kurenai: Not sure yet.
PH: Is it Asuma's?
Kurenai: Who else could the father be?
PH: Kakshi, Gai, Hiashi, Shikamaru...
Kurenai: What the (Bleep) is wrong with you.
PH: Well, with all the screen time you two got, for all we know, you're actually cousins.
Kurenai: And cousins have sex? And if you mke a joke about the Uchihas, I swear to Jashin I'll murder you with m,y Yaoi based Genjutsu!
PH: We don't know that you and Asuma have been having sex.
Kurenai: How the (Bleep) do you think I got pregnant?
PH: We didn't know that Asuma was the father!
Kurenai: How can you not know? It's so (Bleep)ing obvious!
PH: We all suspected it, I'm just trying to confirm it!
Kurenia: Well, consider it confimrmed. I'm leaving!
-Kurenai Storms Out-
PH: Wow, how many people am I going to piss off today? I hope I can set a personal record!
Gai: I really must be getting back to training with Lee, so ask me your questions and i shall answer them with YOUTH!
PH: So, do you like girls?
Gai: Define 'like.'
PH: Are you sexually attracted to them.
Gai: No.
Shizune: ZOMG! So the rumors are true!
Gai: I may be a fan of YOUTH but I am not a pedophile. I love women! big breasts are the best! Youth!
Shizune: So that's what you meant...how dissapointng.
PH: Are you a Yaoi fan, Shizune?
Shizune: OMG totally! SasuNaru is the best, but so is SaiNaru, SasuSai, NaruKono, ShinoKiba, SasuKiba...
PH: Okay okay, we get it, you love the idea of little kids having sex.
Shizune: No, that's not it. I love KakaIru and KakaGai too!
Gai: Did you just say you like me as uke? I'm stronger than Kakashi! I'm seme!
PH: Now this is interesting.
Gai: I mean, I would be. If I was gay.
Shizune: How disappointing.
PH: Okay, looks like you're going to claime you're het. Guess i won't ask about Lee.
Gai: What about Lee?
Shizune: OMG! I forgot, I love GaiLee and GaaLee too. And GaaNaru.
PH: I prefer Yuri. My favorite is TsunaShizu.
Tsunade: What! That's it, ANBU, GET HIM!
-ANBU Agents storm the room.-
PH: Kuso!
...
Sai felt proud of his work and so he submitted it. 'I should work on my Truth or Dare story next, but I want to update my ask fic too. But I need a few more questions.'
...
Hinata sent the warning to Naruto. 'I hope he gets it in time. Please Naruto, don't try to rescue me. If you do then they'll..'
That's when her door was thrust open, and BoogiepopShippuden stormed in.
"You stole my diary..I mean, journal?" He asked, worried.
Hinata turned to him and glared angrily. It was out of character, but she was that mad. "I won't let you use me as bait for your evil game." She threw the book at hif feet. "If you didn't want me to read your diary, maybe you shouldn't have left it lieing around."
"Maybe I wanted you to read it," BoogiepopShippuden said with a slight smile.
Hinata's resolve wavered a little.
'Could that really be it?' She wondered nervously. 'Oh no, what have I done.' She rushed toward her computer and tried to send another email to Naruto-kun, warning him about the first email. She got the oddest error message she'd ever seen a computer give.
Too bad Hinata, I'm not letting you do that. You've lead Naruto straight into my trap. Thanks for your help
Hinata frowned at first, then her face scrunched up into a scowl. "It won't work," she promised. "Naruto-kun and the others will survive your trap. They won't die so easily."
"Maybe not. But they will die. Or at least, Naruto will." BoogiepopShippuden was sure of this.
(Author's Note: Regarding the Ask Fic, Don't worry, I cthink I have enough questions to work with.)