OblivionX
-9-
Clumsy
Gravel crunched as we pulled up onto the sand, marking the boundary of the road and the unmarked path toward their destination. Relena had only said, "Go to the Hatter's house. That's where he's staying." No one but Xaldin knew what she was talking about, so he volunteered to drive.
Unfortunately, by that time, their bodyguards had caught up with them and insisted on driving. Xaldin sat up front with Aeleus, and Ais sat in back with the band, watching them with sharp eyes.
The limo swung around a bend in silence, no one speaking, as the cliffs rose above the horizon. Then another corner was turned and the crashing waves came into view.
The sun was barely kissing the water, painting the edges with the soft pinks and greens of oncoming sunset. Demyx watched as the waves licked the sandy shore, a feeling of bittersweet longing coming over him. He leaned over Ais, who held the window seat nearest, and pressed his forehead against the cool glass.
Ais gave Demyx a dirty look behind his back, leaning away slightly.
Axel sat on the other side with his chin on his hand, staring out at the sea without registering what he was looking at. Roxas sat beside him, looking wordlessly at his hands. Next to them, Zexion took up the rest of the seat as he lay asleep with his head in Yazoo's lap. The falling sunlight played on his face as Yazoo ran his fingers through the silvery blue hair. Zexion, not having slept the last night, had originally been staring at everyone else, but ended up nearly sliding off of his seat as he fell asleep.
Rell had not come with them.
Demyx reached out a hand to roll down the window. It had been a long time since he'd been to the beach... Far too long. He hadn't forgotten why he was here, but along with the need to find Luxord was another need. The need to taste the salt in the air, and to feel the sand and sea between his toes.
Yes, it had been a while since he had been 'home'.
Ais was about to ask Demyx politely but forcefully to sit down, but at that moment the limo pulled up next to a shack in the sand.
Axel kicked open the limo door, disregarding the damage it may cause, and hopped outside followed by everyone else. The salt breeze rushed around them, seagulls threatened to drop presents on them from overhead. The dieing light cast shadows on the open door of the shack. There was no one in sight.
Inside, Demyx opened doors looked under furniture, but the house was deserted. He pursed his lips, looking none-too-pleased about this. "He must be outside, somewhere..."
Roxas looked up from examining the guest room, in which he'd found Dulor's coat and his sunglasses. He handed the sunglasses to Demyx, saying, "He's probably at the beach. I wonder where his host is?"
Demyx stared at the glasses with a distant expression, then folded them and tucked them into his pocket. "At the beach... Its a big beach; that doesn't help us much."
Axel passed, carrying a car of beer he'd found and was making use of. "We should split up, then." He winked at Roxas, who glared at him. "This is serious, Axel."
"'Never said it wasn't." He took another swig.
"I agree, actually..." Demyx said, with absolutely no ulterior motive.
"Of course you agree," said Axel, attempting to regard the whole situation as a joke.
Roxas hit him, but went to go tell Zexion and Xaldin. "We'll go look at the cliffs, Demy. You look at that narrow strip under them, kay? Don't go in the water, Xaldin says there's a riptide."
He and Axel disappeared.
Demyx left his shoes in the hut. The sand beneath his feet was still warm, even as the sun began to sink below the horizon. He watched the orange and reds seep into the darkening blue of the ocean like spilled ink. The bitter, sinking feeling ebbed away to an eerie sort of calm as he stared out at the beautiful scene before him. He closed his eyes and took a deep breath of ocean air.
He wasn't expecting a miracle. They were here to bring Dulor back to the band. To the band; not to him. Why was he even here...? It was his fault this whole mess had started. He opened his eyes again and watched idly as Roxas tried to search with the distraction of Axel up above. In the other direction, the others were searching under and above the docks. What if he wasn't even here?
Demyx watched his footprints in the sand as he walked towards the strip of land he was supposed to be examining. There was the ocean, to his left. He longed to plunge himself into it, and just float away. But no, that wouldn't get him anywhere. Nowhere to go but forward... Step after step after step.
He froze, the soft ocean breeze nipping at his heels. There he was.
He couldn't help but notice how beautiful he looked with the dimming lighting spilling across his figure. He was sitting with his back to the cliff side, staring at the pages of the book on his lap without really seeing them.
"Dulor..." Demyx whispered.
With the wind on the rocks and the ocean crashing nearby, it was entirely plausible that Dulor wouldn't hear Demyx's whisper. Nevertheless, the runaway manager turned a page in his book- the book he hadn't moved since he'd opened it four hours ago. He knew Demyx was there, it didn't surprise him that the singer would find him. He turned a few more pages for good measure, and abruptly his bookmarks fell out of the pages. He shuffled up Demyx's song from the sand and put it carefully back into the spine of the book, placing his fingers over the words he'd already memorized to keep the pages still.
Without looking up, he said quietly, "Good evening, Demyx."
Demyx forced a smile and waved, acting as if this were but a chance meeting among friends. He took a step toward Dulor, but stopped again as he recognized the papers that fell from his book and into the sand. He felt his heart ache with longing once more. There was no chance... He forced the false hope away.
This wasn't about him. It was about the band.
He chewed his tongue, moved through the sand, and took a seat next to Dulor far enough away not to unsettle the man.
"I... I'm sorry. My actions were wrong. I understand, now. I never should have done it... But Dulor, the band needs you. You're the best in the Bizz." His hands were shaking on his knees with the effort of holding back his true emotions. "And..." He whispered, after a moment's pause, "If you want... I'll leave. I bet you could find a new singer in no time. I... I don't want to be the reason this band falls apart."
Dulor was silent for the longest time. He stared down at the pages as through he were reading them, when in truth he was afraid to look up without his sunglasses between them. Realizing this, the manager gave a mental snort and shifted unconsciously towards his singer, the huge space bubble beginning to bother him.
"I should take you up on that offer," he said mildly.
"I... I understand."
"I should, but I won't. Roxas alone would kill me. They're already supporting you, aren't they? Demyx, Demyx..."
"B-but... What are you going to do? The band needs you a whole lot more than they need me..."
"Oh, I don't know about that..." Dulor mused, looking down now with a thoughtful expression.
Abruptly, he snatched up the offending pages and held them back out to the singer, looking Demyx in the eyes with a hint of victory in his. "We shall do this. I think I can trust you to... not repeat this experience, can't I? This..." He touched his lips with one finger, "... Never happened." The hand held out was steady.
Demyx took the pages from his hand, their fingertips barely brushing as he pulled them away. His eyes stared at them without registering the words, his expression unreadable. His lips traced unspoken words, and a look akin to death entered his eyes.
"So I'm just supposed to... Forget?" One tear escaped from the reservoir he'd been holding in since he first set foot on the beach. "Dulor, I... Tried. I've tried forgetting, but I just can't. I can't do it! Everything I do, I keep thinking about you... Everything about you. Your voice, your clothes, the way you smell... Your eyes... I can't look at your eyes, anymore. Not while knowing you'll never look at me the way I look at you."
He reached into his pocket, pulling out the sunglasses that had been so important for so long. They now seemed shallow and unreal. Everything did. He tossed them onto Dulor's lap and stood up.
"I'll never forget... I can't... But I can pretend. I can destroy all the evidence, and then it'll be like it never happened." He stared at the papers clenched in his hands, a look of resolution joining the hurt and distress that coated his eyes like a layer of swirling fog. His fingers curled around the corners of the pages, and with one swift motion the sound of tearing paper joined the hiss of waves in a sickening duet. He let the wind sweep the fragments from his palm and into the ocean.
Water is merciless. It had no emotions to stop it from swallowing the pages into a wash of white and blue from which they would never return. It ate the words from the pages, and finally the pages themselves. A few seconds later, there was nothing left.
"There..." Demyx said bitterly, "You can pretend it never happened, but me... I'll never forget."
He expected relief to come, but there was only a guilt, and a sickening shame. Dulor looked away, away from the pain in Demyx's eyes, and his fingers curled around the sunglasses in his lap. He glanced down at them in disgust, his grip on the hated frames tightening.
Dulor stood up suddenly and walked over to stand next to Demyx. He raised his arm and threw the sunglasses out, out as far into the ocean as he could. They disappeared with a distant splash.
"They were going out of style anyways," he said in the silence that followed, as though what he had just done meant nothing. But then he walked away down the beach, toward the shack without another word, eyes to the ground.
"Dulor..." The sun was almost gone, now. Demyx watched Dulor's silhouette as it crossed the sand. He took a step, hesitant at first, then made up his mind and ran to follow.
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"Look, you crazy ass midget, we're only trying to find our manager!"
"And I'm only telling you he isn't here, obviously. Do you see him anywhere? Do you want to check the cupboards?"
"We already checked them."
"I rest my case! Get off my lawn."
"You don't HAVE a lawn. You have sand!"
"I'm sure I could grow grass here if I tried."
"Grass doesn't grow in sand!"
"It does. You may not be worldly enough to have seen sand-growing grasses, but I have, and I say it does."
"STOP CHANGING THE SUBJECT! WHERE THE FUCK IS DULOR?!"
Axel towered over a short man in a tall hat, shaking with furry. The small man, who was calmly sipping tea, had been talking the guitarist into circles long enough to drive Axel to violence. Roxas stood beside him, trying to hold him back and keep from laughing at the same time. Xaldin and Aeleus watched with amusement from behind them.
"I'm right here, Axel dahling."
The manager abruptly inserted himself between Axel and the shack-owner, causing everyone to fall silent and stare at him. He stared back, returning their strange looks mockingly.
"... What?"
"N-nothing," said Roxas. "It's just, Relena said you were... really looking bad."
"Did she now? So that's how you found me. That's the last time I talk to her when I want to disappear... You, on the other hand, did a marvelous job!"
He turned to the shorter man and delicately took the cup he was holding from it's saucer. Dulor took a sip as the man doffed his hat at the band.
"Hatter, at your service. The Mad Hatter. Welcome to 19 March Hare lane, the Hatter's Shack."
No one bothered to look for a sign to verify this.
Demyx was a few yards behind Dulor, hiding silently in the un-light of twilight. He was silent, but his expression was not that of sorrow; rather he seemed to be watching for something. "Nice to meet you, Mister Hatter." He said, politely.
"Dem! You found hi- oof!"
"I do say, it's very rude to interrupt." The Hatter removed his elbow from Roxas' stomach and returned to bowing at Demyx.
"Quite lovely to meet you too, I drop my hat to you." And he dropped his hat.
"Have a very merry unbirthday," he added.
Xaldin said politely, "Don't you mean, 'I tip my hat to you'?"
"Quiet, young man! If I'd meant to tip my hat it would've been tipped!"
"Um, a merry unbirthday to you, too, I guess." Demyx said with a smile.
Roxas looked curiously from Demyx's smile to Dulor's, but wasn't about to ask in front of the Hatter. The manager bundled his friend up hastily and began to herd him inside, saying, "We can wish everyone a happy-"
"Merry!"
"-unbirthday later. Where are the rest of you? Do come on in." He stepped through the door muttering purposefully about a 'spot of tea'.
Demyx nodded silently, and followed him through the door.
When everyone was situated at a rickety table, Zexion and Yazoo and Ais had been found, and the Mad Hatter was striding around serving tea, Dulor finally sat down. Everyone started talking at once.
"Xaldin's been sitting in his room doing nothing-"
"Xemnas-"
"Demyx was really bad after you left but we couldn't figure out why until-
"And then Rell punched me in the ribs-"
"He said-"
"I have not been doing nothing-"
"If you don't come back soon he says he'll-"
"The record company wants us to leave, but we said we-"
"And then Demyx gave her the puppy eyes and she told us-"
"But how long have you known this man?"
"I think Xem-"
"QUIET!" Dulor slammed his teacup (which miraculously didn't break) on the table.
He waited until everyone was looking at him and said, "Most important info first."
The band leaned forward together and all said, "Xemnas is taking us on tour without you!"
Demyx nodded in affirmation.
Dulor was silent for a long moment, putting his teacup down again with a quiet tinkle.
"... What?"
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