Chapter 2: Life

Pain, it was the first and only thing I felt. I didn't feel tired or hungry or cold, I just felt everything ache and scream and break. It was coiled inside me like a live wire, sparking and shooting lighting through my body, down my arms and through my fingertips. It was more than I could handle, more than anything I had ever experienced in my life and I knew I was going to die.

I could see faces looking down at me, I could vaguely hear them speaking but the frantic pounding of my blood drowned the noises out, I could barely hear myself think. It was impossible to move, to try and find some sort of relief and I opened my eyes wider, trying to figure out these strangers, trying to figure out if these people were trying to help, if they were even real or if they were walkers ripping into me. I forced my body to cooperate and I thrashed, the only noise I could hear now as the snarls and groans of the dead and I felt my fear and pain consume me.

Slowly my body came back into some sort of consciousness, the pain there waiting for me like a torturer enjoying my suffering but this time I was numb, that or I just didn't care anymore. I laid there, not sure if my eyes were open or closed, if I was alive or dead and I tentatively moved my fingers, waiting to see what would happen. They ground, the bone grinding against bone and I felt my jaw clench tight; it was tempting to just get up, to just leap to my feet and fight whatever or whoever was there but something was wrong. It was too dark, it was too cold and as I lifted my bony hand up to be in front of my face, I could only just make out the outline. That wasn't right, I had been drunk in my time, I had also been knocked out cold and no matter what, whenever I woke up it never felt or looked like this.

After what seemed like a minute but felt like a century, I lifted myself up until I was sitting, the pain there nibbling at me but something kept it on a leash. It at least gave me the chance to try and clear my mind but all I could think of was that pain, and I pressed my hand to my side and my fingers felt the mess of flesh there and the sticky feel of blood but it was cold. Glancing around, I tried to figure out where I was and my head swam, my eyes loosing focus and I hunched over, bringing one knee to my chest so I could lean my forehead on it, trying to steady myself.

A gush of air rushed at me rapidly from the darkness, stealing my breath and knocking me back down. It continued, like I was trapped in some sort of hurricane or wild storm, whipping around me and roaring in my ears and I curled on the ground, trying to protect myself but as abruptly as it started, it stopped, everything falling back to silence and I looked up at the surrounding black, my body no longer numb or in pain, my thoughts clear and my eyes able to focus despite the lack of having something to focus on.
What the hell was going on?

I thought I was dying, I should be dead; where was the pearly gates and cold whisky? Heck I would prefer feeling the burning flames and pitchforks over this, whatever this was. Maybe this was my hell, but as I got to my feet steadily, the inky darkness around me swirling like liquid, I realised one thing that brought me hope.
My heart was beating in my chest.
It may sound silly, but it reassured me that I wasn't dead yet and if there was one thing I had learnt nowadays, it's that the dead do not need a heartbeat.
A sick feeling washed over me, hot and heavy; if I really was still alive, how long did I have? How do I wake up?

Carefully I took a step forward, my feet still standing on something solid and I stretched my arms out; not sure what was in front of me. As I forced my eyes to see, to find something, anything in this place, my prayers were answered when a speck of light appeared. At first I thought it was my eyes playing a trick on me but it was there, getting bigger as I stepped closer to it and I felt relief in my chest. I was beautiful, a glowing gold and I watched as it fluttered, as if a thousand birds took off in front of it, a flurry of wings and I could hear it to, beating against the air as they sort their place above the ground.

There was silence again, the sound of my unsteady panting the only thing that reassured me that I was alive, that I had to do something.
So far so good, I thought as I pushed on, eager to get to where there was light.
I froze though when something caught my attention, my ears straining to locate or even hear it again. It sounded faint, like it was far in the distance and I turned, looking over my shoulder behind me. Everything began to tingle as I was met with silence, my throat tightening with fear as something stirred, a deep growl resonating towards me. It stabbed into me like a jagged knife, ripping through me until it stabbed into my soul and it took all I had to keep my knees from giving out beneath me.

Turning back to where I had seen the birds, it was still there and with another quick glance over my shoulders and into the darkness, I forced my legs into a run. I ran despite the pain that was beginning to return, despite my mind becoming heavy and tired and my eyesight becoming blurry.
"Come on Jasmine."
My heart skipped a beat as I recognised the voice; Daryl was there!
Renewed strength kept me upright and running, but my fear was still there, trickling down my spine like icy water, caused by whatever it was I knew was chasing me.

The light was right there, I could feel it starting to warm my skin but my joy was short lived. Sharp claws wrapped around my ankle, stopping me short from the border between these two places and I fell. I didn't hit anything, despite falling, there was no pain from my fall, all I could feel was the hands slowly grabbing up my leg. Hundreds of them, all with sharp talons and claws, slashing and burying deep into my flesh. I was pinned, the blackness of this entity creeping closer, darker than anything that could be possible and I tried to scream, tried to force it off of me but my hands simply passed through it as though it was made of steam, but its hands continued closer, and no matter how hard I thrashed or willed this thing away, it was relentless. The light reflected off those sharp talons, and I was sure I saw eyes watching me, thousands of them and I just knew it would not stop until it consumed me.

I tried, I tried so hard to force it off me, to try and hurt it back in some way but I was losing, I was just too tired. With the darkness up to my chest, reaching up like arms to caress my face and hold my shoulders in some sort of twisted embrace, I closed my eyes, giving one last prayer, one last thought; I was not going to surrender easily to this bastard.

A scream startled me, the dark creature lifting away from me, the sound horrible as though it were millions of people dying and I managed to roll, covering my ears from the sorrowful sound as that wind returned. Pressure eased from my body, the darkness retreating back as the wind billowed over me, scattering it into the unknown. As it slowly died, I felt myself drag in a stuttering breath, my heart ready to burst from fear as I felt something move behind me. Carefully I lowered my hands, trying to hear for anything but the silence was there waiting for me.
As quickly as I could I rolled to my knees, my hands ready to fend off or fight whatever was there but I dropped them to my side uselessly.

The owl stood there, his dark brown feathers ruffling as he adjusted his wings, tucking them at his side. Wide eyes focused on me, tilting his head as though he was studying me as I put my hands out to steady me as something hot stirred in stomach, my body heaving. Something worked its way up my throat, hot and thick before I managed to cough it out. Splattering on the ground, the mess of blood and black liquid sat there in a puddle as I wiped my mouth, disgusted at the sight and the stench. Lifting my eyes back to the owl, it was still there, watching me and I could have sworn it nodded at me, those big eyes blinking slowly before he hopped along the ground, spreading its wings and flying away from me.

I tried to call out, to tell it to wait as I staggered to my feet, careful not to tread in the mess I just heaved up. In front of me the light was shimmering and I cautiously lifted my hand up, it felt like there was scrim or a sort of spider web barrier between the dark and the light and I felt my body shiver as the warmth reached my palm, spreading through my body. It was wonderful but as I stood there, staring through to the other side, I realised how cold my body was. I could hear screaming and the familiar shuffle and growl of walkers, the pain returning slowly to my body and I drew my hand back.
Maybe this was it, my choice if I lived or moved on.
Glancing back around, the darkness that had tried to engulf me was gone, a path spreading from my feet and leading off into the distance. I couldn't see what was up ahead, but I could feel that it was something good.

I was already here, why bother going back and going through all that pain again later on?
I was so tired, there was nothing out there for me. It was no place to live, to have a life; struggling day to day, scavenging for food and trying not to become a meal for something dead. Hell it was still hard trying to get that into my head; the dead weren't staying in the ground and had the munchies for anything alive.
I couldn't keep going like that, who could?

My feet itched and I began to turn when a flutter of wings stopped me. The owl had returned, landing only a foot or two away from me, its elegant large wings stirring the air and I stared at the bird, trying to figure out what game it was playing. A scent filled my nose and I watched as the owl dropped a sprig of jasmine. The white flowers seemed to glow in the dark and I breathed in the sweet scent. Memories began to flood my thoughts and as I focused on them, I could hear voices speaking, familiar and comforting and my heart gave an odd beat of sadness. Behind me I could feel the path fading away, as though it knew my decision before I did.

The owl tilted its head and with great ease it unfolded its wings and flew, and unsure of what would happen, I began to push through the thin barrier, warmth engulfing me.

My lungs felt like they were going to explode as I sucked in a breath, it was as if they had not ever been used, the sensation something new. Moonlight filled my vision and I reached up to cover my eyes as I sat up, panting and trembling. A sheet pooled in my lap and I flicked my eyes around the unfamiliar room.
Where was I? Why did I feel as though I had fallen from a twenty story building and then hit by a truck?
My heart was pounding fiercely in my chest as though it had wings of its own and no longer desired to stay within my chest, my head becoming groggy and heavy and with trembling hands I tangled my fingers in my hair, trying to keep myself from falling off the stiff bed I was on.

Sucking in another breath, I forced myself to calm, to level out my shuddering breath and listen.
The large room was quiet, but I could still hear the tormented screams from my horrid nightmare, only adding fuel to my panic as I managed to twist myself around. My bare feet touched the cold wooden floor, sending a shiver through me. All my senses seemed to be on high alert; the itchy sheet was infuriating, my skin too hot but yet I was freezing. I licked my dry lips, my throat parched and I couldn't find any saliva in my mouth to swallow to ease the dry grainy feel. Finally my eyes adjusted to the dark room, the light from outside comforting but suddenly I would have preferred the darkness.

I couldn't see Trix or Daryl anywhere, the room looking like some sort of experimental lab and as I glanced down at myself, I felt fear spark in me anew. My shirt was practically gone, hacked off just below my chest and revealing my stomach and hips, revealing the chunk of flesh missing. I prodded it with my fingers, harsh shocks shooting through me but it wasn't painful, it was even clean.
What was going on?
After a few failed attempts I managed to get myself up onto my feet, my tatty jeans the only thing keeping me warm as the cold air swirled around me. I felt like a toddler trying to walk again, one foot in front of the other, hands splayed out like I was on a balance rope but I managed, making it to the door.

Pressing my ear against it, I could hear nothing on the other side, there wasn't even a glow coming from underneath the wooden barrier and as I wrapped my hand around the door handle, it wasn't even locked. Slowly and quietly I pulled it open, pocking my head out and glaring down the long corridor. Apartment building, that was my guess and I opened the door wider. I had no idea where I was going or even what I was looking for, some sort of answer would be fantastic, but a mouthful of water wouldn't hurt. I padded out into the hall way, the coarse carpet irritating as I walked and I felt my head spin, stretching my hand out to the wall to steady me. Hopefully whoever it was that called this home was a friendly; at least I hadn't woken up handcuffed to the bed, which would have been the first sign, and the unlocked door, maybe they were stupid, maybe they thought I was dead.

As I fumbled my way down the corridor, I heard movement and I felt my body tense. It sounded distant, and still with my hands on the wall I made it to the stair well, my hands now gripping the cold metal railing but before I could look for the source of the noise I hung my head, trying to ease the thudding headache that was growing and level my frantic breathing.

"Hello?"
I jerked up, almost tripping over my feet but my back still slammed into the wall and I cringed, covering my face as the torches bright light shone into my eyes. I heard the click of a gun and my heart leapt to my throat; I felt like a rabbit cornered, there was no way I could escape a bullet from this close range and I felt as though I was going to cry but I didn't and I dropped my hands.
"Sierra?"
My heart well and truly left me now, along with all my thoughts and pain and discomfort and I stared at the figure in front of me, the torch slowly lowering. I squinted, my eyes having a hard time trying to define a face but my body sang as though I knew exactly who it was.

Vincent stood before me, my brother, my dearest brother who I thought was dead, standing just out of my arms reach, alive and breathing. This had to be a hallucination, I had to still be dreaming, that or that owl was a bastard and I was dead.
"Sierra, it's me."
I tried to step forward, to get a closer look, to touch him and make sure he wouldn't evaporate before my eyes but instead my head became too heavy and my eyes rolled back, exhaustion claiming me.

This time when I opened my eyes, it didn't take as long for them to focus on the plain ceiling, they didn't even ache as I moved them to look at the window, sunlight now streaming through the tatty blind. My mouth wasn't dry, my body not a heavy lump of clay I had to try and manoeuvre, I was just tired.

Slowly I turned my head the other way, ignoring the cracks of my neck and shoulders when they fell on a welcoming sight, my lips curling into a smile.
Daryl sat in a chair beside the bed, his hands hanging low between his knees as he leant forward, a small smile on his own face as he heaved a sigh. I felt my eyes burn with tears as I looked at him, the relief on his face comforting to me, at least there was still something for me to fight for.
"Hi." My voice was barely recognisable but Daryl gave a nod of his head, his smile widening as he leant across as I sat up carefully with his help, warm hands gripping my shoulders.
"How are ya feelin'?" he asked as he helped to adjust the pillow behind my back and I had to blink a couple of times. I was still alive, I had survived a walker bite and I managed to shrug my shoulders, not really sure.
I looked up at Daryl, dark rings around his eyes and I felt guilty, but then I realised just what I must have looked like to him. As if to answer my question, he leant on the bed either side of my waist, leaning down and kissing my lips. It took me a little by surprise but I returned it the best I could, God knowing what possessed him to kiss a girl that had just returned from deaths door, but hey I wasn't going to argue. I placed my hand over his, his free hand brushing my hair from my eyes and he looked me dead in the eyes, the blue in his eyes like staring into a storm and I wondered what he was thinking. Just as he opened his mouth to say something, a door opened and closed and Daryl closed his eyes, stepping back quickly from the bed.

"Mind if I cut in?"
Instantly my eyes moved from Daryl to the man standing at the foot of my bed and I felt those tears slip free from my eyes.
Vincent! He was a live! He was really here, in the flesh and before me!
Trix barked as well, jumping up onto the bed and despite my joints crying out in protest I welcomed his warm licks and embrace, burying my face in his fur and thankful that he was here and alright. Slowly Vincent walked around to me and I held my arms open; I couldn't find any words, I didn't know what to think or say, all I could do was squeeze my arms around him as tightly as I could, never wanting to let go again. Vincent did the same, lowering to his knees and tucking his face in the crook of my neck as I cried into his shoulder.
"I thought you were gone." I admitted, wiping the tears from my face as I sniffed, still not releasing my brother. It was like a part of life, hope, my being was returned to me and I felt my body quiver in his strong arms.
"Not while you're still around. I'm your annoying older brother remember?"
I leant back, Vincent moving his hands to cup my face as he stared at me and I stared back at the face I thought I would never see again, lifting my fingers to trace a scar on his cheekbone, the one that he got the day we were separated and I chuckled to myself.

It was difficult to think back on those times when we had sibling fights, where I would wish he would just leave or he would yell that I had never been born but they were just that, just fights and I would not trade this for anything in the world. Trix growled on the bed, feeling left out and I dropped my hand to him, my eyes looking over Vincent's shoulders and to Daryl who stood in the corner. He looked up, making eye contact and I gave him a smile but he just did that nod of his head and turned, closing the door quietly behind him. I felt torn, I wanted to run to Daryl and to hide in his arms forever but my brother gently gripped my hand, anchoring me at his side and I wanted nothing more than to remain there.
"I was afraid we had lost you."
"Where am I?" I asked, taking a deep breath and rubbing my eyes.
"There's time for that later. Just rest."
I did as he suggested, trusting him and lent back into the pillows; besides, if Daryl was still here then they mustn't be bad people, that and I knew my brother, I could trust him.
"We have so much to catch up on."
I tried my best to hide my smirk, I couldn't think of anything from the last year or so, I was still overwhelmed to be alive, to be in the presence of my brother.

Maybe I would regret later on my choice of life over where ever death would have taken me, but right now, nothing could ruin my high spirits.

Thanks for reading! I hope it wasn't too confusing, I wasn't too sure how to do this chapter.
Happy New Year all!
Welcome back to the living Jas, but now what is in store for her?

Silver Kirin xXx