Chp 3: Death Trap

A/N sorry for the wait! I Had a lot of homework okay!? Still have some, thought…

The ages weren't clear.

Ash is 16 as of now.

Everyone else is around the same age, with Delia 49 and prof. Oak 55.

...

"I... I never... I thought he would accept it..." Delia said crying. "It's all right , some of Ash's Pokemon are already returning, he will come around sometime." Professor Oak said, reassuring her.

"When that bitch comes back I will personally kick his sorry ass." Gary said, out of earshot from delia. "It was a little creepy, but if he thinks he can just magically become the master- and outright worry his mother- he's dead wrong."

"Ash'll never get a girlfriend, anyway. He's just too fucking stupid to know when a girl likes him." Misty stated, matter-of-factly. "I bet he's probably going back through one of the regions again, with some slut flirting every time there alone and Ash not even fucking realizing."

Gary smirked.

"Pikachu, pika pika chu."(I don't know guys, but I think he might try something then, killing himself.) When pikachu saw their puzzled faces, pikachu answered, "Ka chu pi kachu ka pi chu." (I mean, I know a lot of his Pokemon think we can never win, one of the reasons why I stayed here. So he might kill himself if he realizes all his Pokemon don't believe in him.)

"Pikachu, we don't understand." Tracey said.

Pikachu sighed, and began acting his words.

"He might kill himself! OMG! I see your point, though." Brock said.

"I for one, don't really care if he kills himself. He doesn't care about any of us, justs uses us as company then throws us away like fucking trash." There were gasps about what misty just said.

" because he's just an immature kid!" Iris said.

"Think about it! Me and brock traveled with him for two years! And I even thought we had something romantic going for a while! And then, I get pulled back into my gym leader duties and BAM! I never saw him again for years! Its like he doesn't even care!"

"You know what? I agree with misty." May said. "Not only can he clearly see we like him and doesn't even care, but-wait... You know what... What if... If Ash never took the time to see anyone and never took an interest in anyone because he was dating and BEEPing random sluts instead of talking to us. Just had enough girls already he didn't need us. Remember all the times he trained alone!?" May said, as if on a breakthrough.

"I don't want to believe it but...It makes perfect sense."Dawn said.

Everyone looked down, except Iris.

"Actually, I thought he actually was training in those training sessions. I mean, he lost to a guy who got his snivy around 10 seconds ago. It was his first pokemon, too…"

Everyone looked at her like she was crazy.

"...Pikachu beat a Regice… by himself…" May said.

"Alright, someone spill the beans. How can pikachu single-handedly defeat legendaries, but lose to someones starter pokemon, 10 seconds after they got it!" Brock said.

"And how come he never won any official leagues, but won every other league that did not have you stuck in one place after you win?" Serena asked.

"Wait, going along with what May said earlier, what if Ash could win any league he wanted, at any time, but wasn't because his dream wasn't to actually become pokemon master. What if… the whole time we were supporting him, he really never meant to win. He just wanted to travel around, banging everyone he could, and when he decides to retire he's pokemon master with any woman he wants, and is totally rich."

" And doesn't Ash have the ability to use aura, which is a huge advantage?" said Clemont.

"That traitorous bastard... I COULD HAVE SCORED SO MANY DATES! HE WAS STEALING THEM BEFORE I GOT THERE! We could have at least had a threesome..." Brock finished, breaking into tears.

"That motherfucker..." Gary said. "If he doesn't just kill himself now, like that bitch should, act like he's not here when he comes back, and don't let him get to his house. Use everything in your power to stop him- no wait, I'll plant some bombs and blow it up. And make sure he can't go to your city's as well. Even go to drastic measures, like pitfalls and bombs, to get him and his mom away. Don't get caught. And if he cries, let him. We can't kill him and not get arrested-"

"Actually, there is no officer jenny in this area, and were basically the only ones here, so get delia away and we can shoot Ash down." Misty said. " You live here. Don't you know that Gary?"

"-... of course, Misty. I just didn't know you guys wanted to go so far. Anyway, let's , if you guys want to, snipe him and possibly his mother, or let him kill himself." A few looked tedious in the group, but the rest nodded deviously.

"Fuck you, Ash Ketchum..." Clemont finished.

The group left to go eat brocks famous rice balls, like nothing ever happened

And as Delia noticed, much happier than they should be.

...

Sceptiles party, petalburg forest.

"Hey, has anyone seen Charizard?" Kingler asked.

"Who the fuck cares, man!" responded a drunken sounded gliscor.

Basically everybody was drunk, save for the water types, because they can take more acholol in their system. eventually, everybody got drunk and the tree they were partying in, a giant redwood with low, wide branches, hot spring, and rocks below it, looked like it was housing quite a handful of pokemon, and with the number of beer bottles and pokemon littering the ground, the occasional tauros falling out even after all the hard work to get up, looked just the spot for a certain something…

Something professionals prefer as "Surprise Adoption"...

….

A/N next chapter? Ash trains up his aura and saves a couple pokemon. Legendary alert. And Ash is going to be called a different name for the tournaments, obviously. So, vote or request your pick in the reviews! Thanks everybody! It really means a lot to have 12 followers.