Chapter 21

Disclaimer: Twilight and its characters belong to Stephanie Meyer

AN (1): I am going to stop predicting how many chapters are left in this story, the boys each want to have their say.

AN (2): To all of my readers, reviews and friends I thank you, for your continued support. I was encouraged by the interest in the third in this trilogy and have started storyboarding it out.

AN (3): Please note that this chapter has been neither pre-read or beta'd, so all poor grammar is my own.

Carlisle was trying to trust; trust Eleazar to have control over the situation of Edward's absence, trust that his friend and mentor knew where his mate was, and was telling Carlisle all he knew.

This trust however was being overwhelmed by a feeling deep in his soul that all was not as it seemed. Eleazar would never outright lie to Carlisle, but he knew when he was being redirected and diverted by soothing, reassuring words.

It had been three nights and two days since Edward had vanished from the apartment; Eleazar's contacts the only source of information as to the young vampires' location.

It seemed logical that Edward would head towards the sea; he always took such pleasure on the water, however after three decades with his mate Carlisle knew Edward would rather migrate to the calm stillness of a lake or river, over the turbulent tides and sweeping waves of the ocean.

Carlisle was caught between trusting his own instincts; verses believing the evidence presented to him by a respected friend.

In attempt to stop him climbing the walls of the apartment, Eleazar had insisted that Carlisle go to work, and despite being allowed to stroll over by himself, he was surprised to find Carmen once again needing to perform errands in that part of town.

He was being handled; he didn't like it.

Unable to concentrate at work, he gave up in disgust and headed home. Maybe Edward had returned, or at the least had contacted them directly.

In an attempt to clear some of the turmoil in his mind, he decided to walk up the internal private stairs direct to his and Edward's apartment. At the time of building the apartments, Eleazar commissioned the architect to install concealed stairwells to both apartments, he then laid out a substantial sum to have the plans sealed effectively hiding the access ways. These stairwells effectively gave each couple a sense of privacy when needed.

Slipping out of the pocket door behind which the stairs were secreted, Carlisle stood very still, listening for sounds of his friends.

Murmurings were coming from the sitting room shared by both couples; the pitch of the noise indicating tension in the conversation. Using the skills he had developed while stalking Edward in Oberlin, he made his way stealthily to the room next door, and listened.

"I am going to have to tell him, Aro needs to know" Carlisle could hear Eleazar almost in despair.

"Tell Aro!" Carmen interjected sharply. "You have to tell Carlisle first."

"I know, I know" Eleazar groaned. "I honestly thought Edward would come back, not head off like he did."

"Have you had further news from Demetri? Has he given rise to suspect a problem" Carmen enquired softly.

"Demetri has not reported in since he advised that Edward was on the Island and looked to be heading towards him on the mainland," Eleazar explained. "I am hoping to hear from Demetri again soon, before both he and I are obligated to report to Volterra."

Carlisle grabbed the wall in attempt to hold himself up. Island? Mainland?

He was both devastated and relieved that his instincts were correct. Edward was not bobbing over the ocean deep, he had journeyed over the stillness of the rivers and lakes, to return to swampy mire of their past.

His grip on the wall began to dislodge plaster, the noise of which alerting his friends to his eavesdropping. Suddenly Eleazar and Carmen were standing beside him.

"He is going to damage himself," Carlisle moaned.

"I don't think he will, it has been years and he has grown over that time," Eleazar contradicts. "Also Demetri is with him. Edward trusts, and will talk to Demetri. If there are any signs of trouble Demetri knows how to handle Edward with care."

"So what now?" Carlisle gripes. "Do I just wait until he gets it out of his system and comes back…again? I mean is it always going to be like this, he vanishes for an indeterminate period of time and I just have to sit and wait for him to get it out of his system and return?"

Carlisle's tone had risen into a pleading whine, demonstrating both his desperate worry for Edward as well as his growing self-pity.

"Carlisle!" Eleazar barked. "You chose to turn Edward, and when you discovered his talent you chose to keep him with you. I remember those discussions, as well you do, during Edwards early newborn days. You had a choice to give him over to mine and Carmen's care and we would have happily taken him and loved him as our son. Or alternatively you could have left him with Aro. While this would have not been the preferred option for Edward, you had that choice."

Eleazar started to pace around the room. "This is what has been wrong with your relationship. In your mind Edward has either been a possession or a burden, someone who, when not doing as you want, has gotten in the way of your work."

Carlisle cringed at Eleazar's words, physically crawling into himself as the words hit home. He sat heavily on the ground under the weight of Eleazar's disappointment.

Eleazar looked at his friend. "I am sorry that I have been harsh, but not sorry for what I have said. I know that you love him and in your own way would do anything for him, but those things have to be what he wants, without limitation or restraint."

Eleazar crouched in front of Carlisle. "If you can't do this, I will take him from you, formally and officially, because if you don't I can guarantee that the events of Oberlin will repeat over and over."

Carlisle looked at his hands then raising his head gave his friend a distraught look.

"Maybe you should take him," Carlisle mumbled.

Carmen gasped at Carlisle's sudden willingness to give up Edward. After all these years of all of the struggles they had faced together, was Carlisle able to just hand the young vampire to another coven and wipe his hands of the responsibility. If this was true, maybe they had misread their friend.

"No, I mean…" Carlisle struggled for a moment, the couple watched him carefully bring his thoughts together.

"I mean," Carlisle repeated. "Maybe for now, a short time I hope, Edward could be your responsibility, your son. That way neither he nor I would be responsible for each other and we could gain a better understanding of each other and our relationship."

Noting Eleazar's dubious look and continued. "You say I need to let him have what he needs and wants without restraints, but at the moment I find it hard to know what that looks like. If you were responsible for Edward, he would be in a safe coven environment, with the appropriate limits, responsibilities and freedoms."

Seeing that he had now peaked Eleazar's interest, Carlisle pressed on. "During this time I could learn from your example of how a coven should function, but it also would provide a unique opportunity for Edward and me to rebuild our relationship within the safety of your boundaries."

Eleazar stood and gestured the other two to follow him. He led Carmen and Carlisle into the sitting room and relaxed into one of the settees.

"I seriously hate sitting on the floor," he laughed.

"Now back to your proposal. I think it has merit," Eleazar admitted.

Carlisle sat up as Eleazar continued, "We would have to talk to him, and yes when I say we, I mean me. At the moment anything you say to him could be misunderstood and cause further separation between you."

"If and when Edward agrees, we will hammer out the details and present it in a legal signed and notarised document, which I will have to submit to Aro. Under the circumstances I can say Aro would be willing to agree to these terms, as he has mentioned a similar arrangement a number of times in the past."

Eleazar shifted his gaze away from Carlisle, neither needed to voice the fact that any such arrangement suggested by Aro would most likely not involved Carlisle.

"Now Carlisle," Carmen broke through his train of thought. "You need to understand that this new arrangement will change everything, including when and how you interact with Edward. He will not live in your apartment; we will have to make arrangements that he has some private space between the two apartments."

Carmen looked away and then steeling herself, addressed a delicate subject. "While we have no intention of causing either of you pain, your…ah…physical relationship will have established boundaries. Edward will be legally and officially our son and it is within our rights to insist that you, as the leading party, court Edward, until such time as we feel that moving to a fully sexual relationship will not be damaging to either of you."

Carlisle almost changed his mind there and then, but stopped. Carmen had a point; their sex life was currently dependant on whoever had the position of dominance within the relationship, previously Carlisle but more recently Edward. While they were re-establishing their roles as a coven they needed to maintain a more equitable physical relationship; until such time that they could establish a relationship as demonstrated by Carmen and Eleazar.

Carlisle had to trust that Eleazar and Carmen knew what they were doing and that they would not take Edward away from him forever. Carlisle remembered those early heady days when he found Edward and discovered what his beautiful boy could do. He had loved the newborn with a fire he had not thought existed, but within that fire was a lump of ash Edwards 'talent' and the trauma it was to them both made Carlisle seriously think about running away, handing the newborn to Eleazar, and walk away from the giddy temptation of happiness with his mate.

Indeed once in the middle of hunting, he had abandoned both Edward and his kill, running a far as he could, thinking to escape from the complication that had become his life. Despite running a great distance he had not been able to leave, and after many hours wandered back.

He returned to their cabin to find the newborn sitting on the porch, wrapped in one of Carlisle's jackets. Carlisle observed from the tree line as Edward inhaled his scent from the jacket; the only sign of the newborn's extreme level of distress was a tremor that rippled up and down his body.

Returning to the cabin, Carlisle had sat beside Edward and wrapped his arms around his mate. Both knew what had happened and neither spoke of it, not then, or since.

Carlisle knew to his very core that, despite his reservations and Edward's possible complaints, this change had to be made. Because one day it wouldn't be Edward leaving, it would be him…and Carlisle knew that once he did, he would never be able to forgive himself enough to come back.

Carlisle looked at Eleazar with both resignation and hope. "This is our only choice. Do what you must."

Eleazar reached over to pat his friends arm and nodded.

*.*

He became aware of Demetri's concerns as they drew near the medical building, but before Demetri could voice his concerns, Edward spoke.

"I have to see her."

Demetri did not respond. His orders from Eleazar had been to escort Edward, not act as in judgement to the young vampire's decisions.

Arriving at the hospital, they were easily able to enter the premises undetected, quietly making their way to the room in which Mary Pearson had been placed so her physical wounds could heal, while a proper place could be found for her to hopefully one day recover from her mental pain.

Sliding into the room as if a breath of air; Edward looked down at the pale women before quietly sitting at her bedside. She had always been a handsome, strong willed woman. One who had the strength to raise and support her child alone, a child she knew to be different.

While there were still signs of that formidable lady, the person in the bed was a shadow of her former self. Edward noted that Mary was restrained, although carefully enough to ensure that her bonds on her arms did not further damage her wounds. He surmised that the restraints were to keep her abed and reduce the risk of her once again attempting to end her life.

He gently held her hand, wondering at the smoothness of her skin, the frailty of the skin and bone within.

Edward sat with Mary for an hour, vaguely aware of Demetri wandering to the administrative area and phoning Eleazar before returning to his position as guard; able to warn of any interruptions, and to keep track of time through the remainder of the night.

After a time, Mary roused. She looked around confused and then spotting Edward next to her she rasped, "William, is that you?"

Unable to tell a falsehood to the lady, Edward shook his head. "No, Mrs Pearson. I am a friend of William's he wanted me to visit you. How do you feel?"

Mary frowned, Edward could hear her thoughts trying to pull together, trying to clear the fog created by the medications, blood loss and devastating grief. He could see when the memories clicked.

"Mr Cullen? Edward?" she asked confused. Then as if a fire had been lit in her mind she barraged him, "What are you doing here? You left, you left him? My poor William, he loved you so much and you left him. You left him alone, you left him to run away to war, you left him to die. You left him!"

She gasped at the effort her outburst had cost her, she tried to wipe the tears coursing down her checks, but the restraints stopped her movement.

Edward went to dry her tears, but she pulled away, "No don't you touch me…you devil, murderer." Edward pulled back, distressed at her reaction.

Delving further into her mind, he could reach into her anger and grief riddled mind. The fact that he could delve so deeply into her thoughts was a clear indication of the level of damage to her sanity. Nothing was hidden from him, neither her surface thoughts, nor the undercurrents of her developed memory. This was something he only encountered in the very young or the insane.

He waited for her internal turmoil to calm and then watched as the harsh aggression turn to confusion which then became unfocussed and vague.

He sat watching quietly, trying to understand himself why he wanted to be there, sitting next to a women sliding into insanity at a rapid pace. It was not as if he could give her anything to help her disease, equally she could not provide him forgiveness.

"Mary," Edward breathed softly. She made movement to wipe her face; Edward watched her struggle against her restraints. The scene was heartbreaking and without thought he released the straps from her hands.

Now able to move her hands Mary Pearson wiped her face, then turned sideways to face Edward and whispered, "He loved you."

Edward sighed, "I know he did."

"I feel myself forgetting him, I am losing my beautiful William all over again. Can you tell me about him, what you remember?"

Edward could not refuse the request and spoke softly about his memories of William. He also added thoughts and images that he had gained from William during their time together, particularly regarding the young man's love and care for his mother and appreciation for all she had done for him.

As he sat next to Mary Pearson, watching her mental faculties slip away as they quietly talked about the young man that they both cared for; Edward finally realised why he was there. Not just in the hospital, but in Oberlin. He had fled New York, his mate and friends so he could go back to remember, to talk and share and to finally acknowledge something that he never could and never would be able to again.

"I loved him too," he murmured in her ear. He really did. It was nothing compared to the love that he felt for Carlisle, different to that he felt for Eleazar and Carmen, but it was there.

For the time they were together Edwards love for William was that of two close companions, kindred spirits in the world. However he was not blind to the situation and realised that had his soul not already been captured for eternity by Carlisle, his love for William Pearson would have shifted to something more romantic, more permanent.

As these realisations took over his mind, he continued to speak quietly until Mary Pearson dozed off. He sat absolutely still, until a faint thought from Demetri roused him, the other had stayed a discrete distance away, but had moved closer when movement indicated that nursing staff would soon be visiting Mrs Pearson.

Leaning over Mary, Edward brushed her hair aside and gently kissed her forehead. He then reached for the restraints that he had removed.

As he gently held one hand to reattach the strap, Mary's eyes opened and she rasped, "Please, no…"

Edward sighed, "Mary they will go back on when the staff notice."

She smiled, "I know, but please give me this short time." She continued, "I know that I will not ever see you again, so whole else will give me some respite? Please…"

Edward knew there would be some consternation amongst the staff as to how the restraints had come undone, but as she had stated, there was little chance that they would be removed in the near future. He gently replaced her hand onto the bed.

"Goodbye Mrs Pearson," he spoke gently.

"Goodbye Mr Cullen," she replied. "Thank you for coming to see me. I will tell William that you called; but I am sure you will see him at school again this evening for practice."

Edward looked at the woman sadly and watched as her mind succumbed further to its disease.

"Goodbye," he whispered and quietly left the room.

Falling into step with Demetri the two left the hospital and with the rising sun imminent, they headed towards the building that had been Edward and Carlisle's home in Oberlin.