BPOV
Bella… Bella… Bella…
Somebody just calling my name. Why couldn't they just leave me sulk in my depression? Why didn't they let me sleep? Sleep in a dark void of nothing. A dark void where I wasn't bound to Earth in any way, shape, or form, where I could forget about my life and everything in it.
"Bella. Up. Now."
I reluctantly rose at the sound of my half-brother's dead voice. For only sharing half of our genes, we were so alike. Dead. Empty. Lifeless. Why wouldn't we be? I had lost a sister, and Jasper had lost a soul mate. We had perfectly good reasons to be like this. "Mom's going to be up here in a few minutes to make sure we haven't cut ourselves again."
I sighed and sat up in my bed. The gray-white covers ruffled slightly around my thin figure, a result of two months' worth of eating as little food possible. I mean, what's a girl to do, if her mother locked her out of the kitchen? Away from the knives, yes, but away from the food. Not that I minded. Just another form of physical pain to rival my emotional stress.
Jasper had exited our room and gone downstairs while I was mulling the morning over; I could hear the faint squeaks and cracks of the stairs and floorboards flexing under his feet, along with the over-cheery greeting of our mom in the kitchen.
While I had the room to myself, I slipped into the bathroom. I locked the door out of habit, not for the untrue fact someone would peek at me. Mom was a girl, and hello, my mom, and Jasper was my brother. That'd just be wrong.
Stripping down, I adjusted the water to a scalding hot and stepped in, my skin instantly going red from the heat. My eyes closed in partial relaxation, I reached blindly for my strawberry shampoo, poured a large glob on the palm of my hand, and massaged my scalp and large quantity of thick hair. Rinsing, I instantly put on my conditioner. After a few more minutes in the shower, I got out and dried myself.
But I winced as my towel passed over my cuts. The two deep knife wounds that nearly went to the bone on my left shoulder were still tender from last week, and spilled over with puss and an oozing liquid whenever I picked at it. Jasper tried to help me kick the habit, but I just kept picking. And now there would be scars. Forever reminding me…
A hand knocked sharply on the door, startling me.
"Isabella Marie Swan, if I find one trace of bleach or blood in that bathroom, you are going right back to rehabilitation!" My mom warned, and stomped off again. I waited until she was out of earshot to move again.
I wrapped the towel tightly around my body and turned to the mirror to brush and dry my hair. But I broke down instead.
My once chocolate brown eyes were dull. My skin was so pale you'd think I'd never seen sunlight in my twenty years of living. I must admit, I looked fragile, like a dying butterfly or wilting daisy. An unhealthy gray tinge to my body made me look somewhat like a zombie. My long reddish brown hair was black in its damp stage.
If it wasn't for that soulless man, I wouldn't be here right now, this broken. I'd be somewhere in southern California, awaiting the arrival of Jasper and Alice from their honeymoon. But, Fate's not that kind, is it? It just has to make things get in the way. Always.
My hand hovered over my razor for a second, but in the end I huffed and got dressed in shades of a greenish gray (Mom would kill me for wearing black). I was just walking out my bedroom door when my mom appeared at the top of the stairs.
"Bella, finally!" She grabbed my arm gently and tugged me down the stairs to the kitchen, where Jasper was munching on some toast, his eyes distant and empty. He gave no reaction when the shrill ring signified a phone call. Mom bustled off to get it.
"I was thinking maybe we would go out today, maybe restock on some music." I offered monotonously, choosing my words carefully. I tried to avoid anything that Alice would say, for Jasper's sake.
Jasper lazily turned his eyes to me, blinked slowly once, and nodded his head, before turning back to his toast. "Yeah. Anything to get Mom off our backs." He gave me an understanding and thankful smile, small and pitiful as it was. It still made me proud that I made him do that.
"Oh, Rosalie! That's wonderful!" My mom gushed in the kitchen. Rosalie was Jasper's cousin, who lived just a few hours' plane ride from here. "When's the date?"
Mom talked excitedly some more while I got my breakfast ready; a bowl of cereal and glass of orange juice. Jasper and I ate in silence until Mom burst into the kitchen, a wide and hopeful smile on her face.
"Good news!" She shouted. "Rosalie and Emmett are getting married!"
I inhaled sharply, but not because of the shock. My eyes flew to Jasper. I could see the tears already forming in his sky blue eyes.
"Jasper, come on. Let's go." I said hurriedly. I gripped his arm, half-pulled him out of his seat at the kitchen table, and pulled him to the entryway before going back to scold Mom. When I saw her, she was completely oblivious.
"Mom, how could you? How could you mention that, of all things, around Jasper?" I pleaded angrily. Mom just stared wide-eyed at me. "Do you honestly see how much pain he's going through? It's only been four months since…"
I trailed off, traitor tears falling down my face as I thought of Alice and the day she was murdered. The look on that man's face, the manic happiness and fulfillment in his blood-thirsty eyes. It was disgusting, and the memory brought shivers down my spine.
"How could you be so inconsiderate? To Jasper and me?" My voice broke. "I'm happy for Rosalie, but cut us some slack!"
With that, I stormed out of the house, slamming the particularly heavy front door behind me. Without hesitation, I got into my old red truck and sighed as I closed the door. Jasper looked at me with apologetic eyes and placed a comforting hand on my shoulder.
"It's alright, Bella." He said quietly. "She didn't mean to do it."
By then I was breaking down, crying my eyes out to drench my hands, arms, and most of my shirt. I could vaguely feel Jasper embracing me, shaking himself, but I could really only feel the heaving sobs coming from my chest.
"Bella, if we stay here any longer, Mom's coming out to get us." Jasper warned in a low voice. I looked up to see Mom peeking out from between the curtains. As soon as she caught my glance, she disappeared again. "Are you okay to drive?"
I bit my lip. "Yeah. I'll be fine."
I started the car, ignoring the thunderous engine roaring at me, and began the bumpy road down our long drive way.
Jasper and I were staying with my mom in her cabin near Forks, Washington, a long ways away from her mansion in southern Maine. It wasn't as big, only two small stories, and only had two rooms, each with their own bathroom. We were only staying there until the end of September, when we planned to go back to California for college.
Jasper had wanted to go to Alaska, somewhere cold and bleak like his new personality. But I got him to abandon the idea, on the condition that I would go with him to the college of his choice (in a warm, inhabited area). I was the only one Jasper would really talk to, and vice versa, though I tended to ramble when someone made me angry.
As we endured the last pothole on the dirt drive way, I turned onto the highway towards Port Angeles. Not many cars were out on the roads, mainly for the simple facts of it being ten o'clock in the morning on Tuesday morning.
"So, what did you say to Mom?" Jasper asked, almost with no interest at all, but he got it instantly when I didn't answer.
"I'll just be glad when we're back at school. I can take anymore of her slip-ups without going insane." I muttered, half-hoping Jasper wouldn't hear. He did. He turned his face to look out the window at the green blurs of passing scenery.
"Why do you still have this thing?" Jasper whined after a few minutes of silence. I took a brief glance at him. "I can still distinguish individual leaves we go past."
I frowned. "Why do you have to insult my car?"
"Bella, you're my sister, and I want you to have the best." Jasper started, giving me a surprising but sincere smile. "And be honest; this lump of rust is not the best. We're going car shopping after music."
With a groan, I said, "Jasper! Updating our collection is going to take enough money!"
"But, my sister needs the best." Jasper insisted.
"But I don't want the best!" I whined like a five-year-old. Jasper chuckled; a sad, unused sound that sounded foreign to his lips. Even Jasper seemed surprised at his actions.
"But it would mean so much to me." Jasper whispered so sincerely, I actually thought he meant it. I took a quick glance at his eyes, which gave me all the answer I could ever need.
"Fine." I huffed, defeated. "But nothing to expensive. No extra persuasion."
Jasper groaned and leaned back in his seat. "Fine. But no within reason."
My hands tightened around the steering wheel. 'Within reason' was my crutch, my reason to deny things. Without it, I couldn't… do anything. I was just as helpless against without my 'within reason' as I had been against Alice on one of her shopping sprees.
The rest of the loud car ride was spent in a comfortable silence, though I could feel Jasper's peppered anxiety, as I was sure he could feel mine. We just haven't been out and about for a while. We basically abandoned our social lives at the beginning of the summer, once we weren't forced to use them everyday. But, how awkward would it be if we saw anyone we knew again?
Jasper directed me through the parking lot to the entrance nearest to Best Buy. Once we procured a spot, we headed inside.
The blast of sound nearly made me deaf.
My hands automatically cupped over my ears to block out the loud noises of music, games, and videos playing, as I saw Jasper do the same. We exchanged a worried look, telling me that we both underestimated how much being isolated from the world had an effect on us.
"Jasper." I mouthed. "What do we do?"
He jerked his head to the door, and I followed him outside, which seemed oddly quieter now.
"Jasper, we can't listen to music in that!" I exclaimed.
"I didn't think that would happen." He whispered, shocked. "I never knew hearing so little could have such an effect."
"Let's walk around for a bit." I suggested. "We might be able to adjust to so many people."
Jasper nodded and we set off through around the rest of the mall, through hordes of unmoving people that were quickly testing my patience. The unmoving part, and the more than a few passers-by gaping at Jasper and me.
"Why are they looking at us like that?" I asked Jasper after a few more minutes of walking through the sea of stares.
Jasper was about to answer when I caught sight of a T.V. store on my right, showing a picture of me, Jasper and… Alice. My eyes flew to Jasper again, whose face was contorted with emotional agony as he stared at the picture. A tear crept its way down his cheek.
"… and today marks the 4-month time period since a tragedy in southern Maine, including the murder of Mary Alice Brandon and the disappearance of Edward Masen…"
My jaw dropped. Edward, my gardener, disappeared at Alice's murder?
"… police authorities have done all they can to find Masen, as he is not presumed dead anymore, due to a new lead found by a Jacob Black, age 19. Black says he was walking back from his job in Port Angeles just earlier this afternoon when he caught sight of a man, Edward Masen, being dragged out of an alleyway and into a black Mercedes, license plate number 473-FRX. If you see this…"
Somebody, Jasper I think, tugged me roughly away from the window of the T.V. store and quickly through the mall. Whoever was guiding me practically shoved the other shoppers out of the way. I could hear him grunting as he elbowed through the crowds, but I couldn't see him. I was too concentrated on the cogs turning in my head, trying to see why a murderer would kidnap a gardener.
EPOV
I don't know how long ago it was that I had been forced into the back of a car. The only sound that had filled my ears was the faint shouting of a man. No, not a man; a teenage boy that had spotted my captors and me. I couldn't warn him to leave and run; I was too weak. My lips were cracked, my throat was dry, and my skin was so littered with cuts, bruises, and scabs that its pale tone was barely visible. My hair must have been matted and dirty beyond recognition. They made sure of that. They didn't want anyone to find me. To recognize me. They just wanted me to disappear to the rest of the world beside themselves.
Four months ago, I had made the biggest mistake of my entire life. Running after the murderers was foolish and reckless, and how did that fare? Now I'm being fed just enough to keep alive, enduring torture everyday, not knowing who it was that they're target at Bella's house was. I had no idea if the one person I was supposed to protect was the victim.
I groaned, partly from the searing pain all over my body. I shifted and the warm metal of handcuffs cut further into my skin and I bit my tongue hard to keep from crying out. I'd been silent these past months, and a bit of metal in an infection was not about to break that streak.
Well, not that I could have screamed. They had gagged me with the most disgusting rag, covered in my bile from over the past few months. Sometimes I wonder if they deliberately give me things like that just to hear me speak. I hadn't broken my unspoken promise, and their efforts had doubled, no— tripled over the past few days. They were determined, and I knew I was going to die under their wrath. Soon.
I hope they hadn't killed the boy that spotted us. He was my only hope.
A/N: Like a hypocrite, I like stories that have relatively long chapters. A.K.A.: Not mine. All my other stories have incredibly short chapters, and I'm trying to change that with this one. The chapters will get longer.
No worries,
Kylie M.