Chapter 19: Under White Wings
The very next morning we were summoned by Captain Carlisle, and all of us lads took one look at each other once we were informed and thought the same thing: we were all staying on the Resolve and we'd be leaving very soon.
Needless to say, after discovering the strange mystery behind Bennett's and Adam's rings, I tried to piece everything together in my head when I went to sleep. Surely, the man Bennett had run into could only be Jack, for Jack's red bandana belonged only to him. Plus, Bennett described him as drunk. Of course it was Jack he had run into.
But now I was left with another mystery. Why did Jack want to get rid of such a lovely ring? What did the strange, confusing message mean? And why the hell did he leave his ship to some whore? The solution to such an odd anonymity lied elsewhere, and I had a bad feeling it would not be revealed for quite a long time. Unluckily for it though, I was dying already from the wait.
After our brief meeting with Captain Carlisle, we were all quite beatific, exiting the captain's quarters on the Resolve with grins that stretched from ear to ear. It was only when we were back on land did we express our high spirits in the more suited form of cheers, howls and unconstrained gamboling. The thrill of a new voyage, new assignments and possible new adventure was too much for one man to contain.
We jumped and pranced around the docks, throwing hats in the air and giving playful punches at each other. Most of all, Andre, for he was promoted to Ordinary Seaman and was no longer confined to the meager and useless profession of ship's boy. It was decided we'd celebrate for him at Ian's home. That night would be the last moment of fun and hilarity before it was time to prepare for the ocean again. And I never felt more ready to leave because I had the perfect, concise direction of where I was heading. I knew I would find Jack at last.
The party was very amusing. Several guests all came to celebrate our departure, but more importantly, Andre's promotion. The dear lad was nearly joyful to the point of tears, for he was one step closer to becoming a true officer of His Majesty's Royal Navy despite his orphaned roots. If he didn't shed any tears over the matter, I sure did, though out of the sight of my mates of course.
And after all the drinking and dancing and cheers and tears, we finally left to go to bed. And I dreamt of treasure. I dreamt of pirates. I dreamt of a red dawn. And I dreamt of a man named Jack waiting for me.
We left the very next morning.
There was nothing new when we reached the dock. We simply walked up to Mister Jenson, and he signed our names in the ship's book and then we strolled up the gangplank, trusting that our luggage was being loaded onto the ship. There were quite a few new faces on deck when we arrived, possible friends or foes in the near future.
Mister Sumner had called for more ship's boys again, since Andre was now an Ordinary Seaman, and strangely, red haired Willard was not there. Later on, I found out he was let off because it was he who had lit a light on the night we were attacked by the French. Serves you right, Willy, I thought. And without Will, there was no Dan, and so Mister Sumner was forced to find four more new ship's boys. I honestly hoped I'd be promoted to something on the next voyage, for I sure wasn't about to share my hammock with someone again. But as always, I was cursed with bad luck.
My dawdling caught Mister Sumner's eye, and he called me over to the other ship's boys. He introduced me to my new 'partner' in duty and also for my hammock. He was about twelve, perhaps older, and he was around my height, and vaguely appealing. I hoped he wouldn't be any trouble.
"I'm John," he said, holding out his hand for me to shake. I did not hesitate to shake his hand, knowing if I looked at it questioningly, I'd be suspicious.
"I'm Jack," I replied, squeezing his hand rather harshly. "Ya new to this sea life?"
"Actually, no. I were on another ship 'fore this one."
"Really? Well, that's good to hear. At least I won't be bunking with someone who don't know where he's going. I dunno about you, but I think I'd like to pay a visit to the galley."
"Half rations for us, right?"
"I think so," I replied, wrinkling my eyebrows. I never paid much attention to my serving of food. Perhaps young John knew a lot more than I expected him to. "How old are ya?"
"Thirteen." I nodded with an 'aye' and spoke no further, having stuck my foot on a ladder below deck and focusing on seeing who else was new on board.
"Come on, Jack!" came John's encouraging shout as he pulled off his shirt, took a few steps back, ran forward and launched himself into the water.
We had been out to sea again for about two weeks, looking out for pirates again—not really the French, since the more experienced captains and all ranks above were taking care of that. But of course, we could land a ship full of French pirates. Now that would be quite a laugh.
Occasionally, we'd discern an approaching ship, but it'd ultimately only end up being a merchant ship judging by their neutral flag and their willingness to agree to an examination by our captain, which was exactly what Captain Carlisle and his closest group of men were doing while John and several of the other boys were using our time idle to have a quick swim in the sea.
The new lot of ship's boys was not as bad as the first, and I found them all quite adorable and friendly. We had become a good band of mates, though I still managed to keep in touch with my middies and seaman. All of them were younger than me and still growing, but thankfully I didn't have to witness them doff their pants as well. I would have been cherry red if I had to watch that.
John waved a hand at me, beckoning me to join them too, but I stayed at my spot, leaning against the rail and sending them a dark look. "Oh, c'mon, Jack! What are ya afraid of?" Being discovered, I thought to myself.
"I can't swim," I lied, and the boys laughed.
"Yer on a ship an' ya can't swim? What good are ya then if ya fall over board?" challenged John.
"Yeah! Yer not much for helpin' the King's Navy now are ya?" said Charley, the youngest of the ship's boys.
"Hello, Jack," said a merry voice, and I jumped a bit at the arm that suddenly dropped onto my shoulders. As soon as I saw who did it, I pushed him away and sent him a small kick.
"You could try tellin' me you were comin' before creepin' up like that, Mister Turner," I griped, returning my attention to the boys that were swimming.
"What are you doing?" asked Roland, leaning down with me and as soon as he noticed the boys swimming, he gave a jolly leap. "Hey! Look! They're havin' a swim! Hey, Dob!" I shook my head at how easily boys were entertained. Swimming. I didn't need to go swimming to have fun.
A few feet trampled over, and I heard Dobbin heavily breathing. "What, Roland?" he asked bitterly.
"I'm goin' for a swim. Wanna come?" And as simple as that, Dobbin's bitterness was replaced with a sigh of relief.
"Why the hell not?" And soon enough, the two middies were removing their fine midshipman's uniforms until all they had on were their trousers and with a hoot, Roland backed up and then sprang into the water, spinning in a curled ball as he landed with a splash, and he got a few claps of approval from John and the other ship's boys.
"Your turn!" he yelled, and Dobbin thought for a moment, trying to think of a way to beat Roland's impressive dive and soon equipped with his plan, he stood on the railing backwards and flipped down into the water that way.
"Show off," I heard Roland mutter.
Then the boys were off, laughing and kicking at the water as they took the time when they were supposed to be keeping watch, to go for a swim instead. It was a good thing the captain and all his lieutenants were on the merchant ship, leaving the older midshipmen in charge, and honestly, they were not a very observant group at all.
"Now it's Jack's turn!" cheered Dobbin, looking up at me with a mischievous smile. I only growled in reply.
"I told ya I can't swim!" I protested, doing whatever it took to keep me and my body away from that water. If I did, my soaked clothes would stick to me like glue and my figure would immediately be determined.
"Sure ya can!" said Roland, joining in on Dobbin's plot to get me in the water. "You saved my life after all when I went overboard."
"I was tied to a life rope, you idiot!" I snarled back, getting very irritated with their fervor.
"Fine, suit yourself. My, isn't this water just deliciously cool, Dobbin?" mocked Roland, taking a backstroke through the water. I wanted to chuck a stone at his middle and see who'd be laughing then.
"Aye, it is, Roland. It beats standing on the hot deck doing nothing but staring enviously at us for swimming, doesn't it?" That pushed me over the edge, and I turned my back to them, sitting my bum on the railing with arms crossed over my chest and glowering at the ship lying beside the starboard side of the Resolve.
"You look happy," remarked someone, and I turned my head to find Bennett walking over. I didn't reply, too angry at the boys to do so, and he leaned on the railing beside me, staring out into the water. "Looks like some people are having a jolly time," he observed, taking off his hat and running a hand through his damp hair. I had removed my hat a long time ago, my sweat nearly soaking it, for without a doubt the air was inescapably scorching, especially with the sun beating down on us so freely, with no sweet cloud to absorb its searing rays. Our skin was left to torture from sunburn.
"Yeah, we're having fun," taunted Roland. "And Jack is definitely no fun because he can't even take part in fun things such as swimming." Bennett looked over at me, amused with the joke and punched me lightly on the arm.
"Aren't you going to join them?" he asked with the confidence that I would say yes.
"No. Swim with those cads? Never," I grumbled, not budging from my seat. Bennett leaned away from the railing so that he stood upright and moved so that he stood right in front of me, thankfully blocking out the sun from my face.
"Why not? I'll go."
"What? And you think I'll follow?" I retorted, surprised that he would think that I'd do anything for him.
"Well, now I know you won't. But I order you to," he replied smartly, grinning to himself.
"Applause to Mister Bennett for threatening Jack!" whooped Roland, punching his fist into the hot, dry air.
"I am disinclined to acquiesce to your request," I snapped back, having heard the phrase often used by my mother. I hoped I did justice to her words.
"Well, that does not—"
"Give you much incentive to fight fair, now does it?" I interrupted dully, knowing very well what he would say. I understood him well enough to know his most used statements, and he particularly liked that one as a comeback. "I ain't gonna change my mind, Bennie." I only crossed my arms over my chest and glowered at the swabbed deck beneath my swinging legs.
Bennett peered at me for a moment, and then moved to the side, leaning against the larboard rail but looking at me. I could feel his stare on the side of my head. "You are very hot-headed, Jack. Do you know that?"
I was slightly shocked at his use of vocabulary. For such a well-raised and proper young man, I imagined him to never say 'hot-headed.' It was too simple a word, and from that I resolved that he was using the word for a reason, most likely a pun, and so I decided to play gullible with him.
"Yes, I know I am very stubborn," I replied plainly, refusing to return his stare.
"Perhaps you need to cool that hot head of yours then," he proposed with minutely present mockery. "Won't go well on a ship if some man manages to get you off your last nerve." As if I was unaware of his movements, he stopped leaning on the rail and stood upright again, facing the calm sea.
"Indeed," I muttered, before slipping off the railing, grabbing Bennett's shoulder and shoving him overboard. With a surprised, 'Jack!' he tumbled into the water, plummeting into it with a very large splash that showered over the other boys.
As he accustomed himself to the water, he looked up at me as he treaded in place, water dripping neatly down his face. "Satisfied, are you, Barlow?" he asked, grinning despite the formality in his voice.
"Very. Now, if you can excuse me, I'll just be down below decks catchin' up on me learning with Doctor Cavanaugh." And with a salute, I meandered down the ladder below decks, smiling widely at the murmurs the boys were sending behind my back.
Doctor Cavanaugh was not in his cabin when I came down, and so I just took one of his books to read and then headed back up to the main deck, finding below decks too dreary an atmosphere for me to be content in, especially because the heat was no different down there as it was on the top deck.
Emerging from below, I noticed a few wet, dripping feet on the larboard side of the ship and the feet belonged to the group of lads who had gone for a swim. All of them were shirtless, including Bennett, and I remembered that I was not to gawk at their glistening wet bodies. Dammit, Astrid. Just keep walking. Up the foremast to the foretop and you'll be safe from their eyes. Sadly for me, I was too entertained by them all that I just had to have a few words with them, which only showed how more of a whore I was.
"Swim go well for you all?" I questioned, seeming very uninterested, and they all looked at me, eyebrows raised with a look of vague suspicion.
"Yes, it did," said John. "The water was very refreshing, wouldn' ye say so, lads?" They all nodded with an, 'aye.'
"Good to hear that. Now you all will be crusted with sea salt and ye'll be pruny and not to mention reek a bit, but—"
"As does every other sailor, Jack," intruded Dobbin all-knowingly. My mouth was open and ready to rebut, and yet no words came from my mouth. I was out of retorts, and recognizing my defeat, I stomped off to the foremast shrouds and scaled them until I reached the foretop, where I sat myself comfortably down and opened up Cavanaugh's book.
Only, I felt something crinkle as I sat down, and I realized it came from my shirt. Feeling around for the source, I pulled what made the noise out of my vest and noticed that it was the letter I had written to Adam some long and fine day ago. It was sealed and ready to be sent if only I knew where he was stationed. But strangely, I was afraid of sending the letter. In fact, I really didn't want to send the letter anymore.
I broke the seal, figuring that if I was never going to send it, that I should just rip it up and cast it off to sea. My hand was on the edge, formed in a tearing position, but I never made the tear.
"What are you reading?" said a voice, and I nearly gasped at the intrusion, my fingers rapidly trying to refold the letter in vain.
"N-Nothing," I stuttered, attempting to be rid of the note, but instead, my energetic fingers only earned me a cut from the edge of the paper. "Damn," I hissed, bringing my forefinger to my lip and sucking the blood.
"I'm sorry I startled you," he said, and I shook my head.
"No, 'tis quite all right. I am not terribly fazed by it… at least, not so much." He smiled and took a seat beside me on the foretop, and, dare I add, he was still wearing no shirt. I was already feeling my ears getting red. Thankfully, I had the sun to blame it on if asked about it.
"Wha… What are you doing here, Bennett?"
"Well, the others have taken to watching what's happening on the merchant ship…" He pointed to the right, and I saw the lads now leaning on the starboard rail intently watching the activity on the merchant vessel. "And, well, I've been amongst ships for ages now and I do not find it very fascinating. Thought I'd see what you were up to."
"Hell, Bennie," I began, making it seem as if his decision to visit me was ridiculous. "I'm jus' readin', mate. Nothing exciting happening here." I heard a loud flap and I looked above me, seeing the white sail billow about in the wind. The anchor was down of course, so the ship was going nowhere, but it was still nice to see those white sails all puffed up and looking as if they were going in some direction.
"Is that a letter you're reading?" he inquired, pointing to the folded piece of yellow paper in my trembling left hand. "Who's it from?"
"No one you'd know," I lied.
"Another admirer?" he joked, raising his hand as if he was about to lay it on my shoulder, but he stopped himself and turned away from me, focusing his eyes somewhere else.
"No, well… yes… sort of. To them."
"All right," he replied, obviously taking a sudden disinterest in the subject. "Do you ever…" he paused, his face somewhat scrunching up as he tried to find the right words. "Did you ever figure out what our rings meant?" he asked, changing into the past tense.
"It obviously is a clue to finding treasure, Bennie," I said. And Jack. "It's funny how you obtained it. Would you describe the man who gave it to you?"
"I can't really remember a very thorough image of him. All I remember is his bandana and his odd walk. Nothing else seemed distinguishable." I pouted with disappointment and set Adam's letter down, while picking up Cavanaugh's book. The foretopsail blowing around us suddenly bloated with wind and I felt the breeze get sucked up my nose as I relished the air.
"Ya know, Bennie," I began, letting my eyes wander above at the sky and towering sails above us. "I always pictured a ship to be like… well…a bird."
"A bird?" he echoed, amused with my comparison. "How so?"
"Well, the actual ship, without the sails, is like the body of a bird. It's the base. It contains the heart of the bird and the brain which helps determine where the bird will decide to fly, which in ship's terms, would be the wheel and our good ol' coxswain."
"Go on," he encouraged, the corner of his mouth curving into a smile. He did indeed look quite beautiful in the sunlight. And his soft damp hair was slowly drying, and I was feeling very tempted to just spit out that I was a girl so that he could just take me and—I paused in my thoughts, and remembered what we were talking about in the first place.
"A bird also glides smoothly around its territory, meaning the air, and has strong feet to land. Just like a ship glides effortlessly on the sleek blue main and has an anchor to pause." Bennett looked at me, even more perplexed than before, and I knew my comparisons were rather childish and hardly significant, but I cared not. A ship was like a bird to me—a sparrow—my freedom.
"Now, let's take a look at the sails." I had to lean to the side and back a little, making me just a hair away from grazing Bennett's bare shoulder and pointed a finger up at the sails. "The sails direct where the ship is going, or at least harnesses the wind that moves it, thus making it like the wings of a bird."
"White wings," added Bennett, perhaps finding the romanticism in my silly contrast.
"Yes, white wings. The sails are the wings that harness the wind to take us to our destination… wherever that may be."
"Wherever you decide it to be," answered Bennett, smiling up at the bright sails. "Every ship has a destination, Jack. No one would be foolish enough to set sail with no destination in mind. That'd be like…"
"…like going through life without dreams," I finished. While my face was still upturned to gaze at the 'white wings' of our fine sea bird, I noticed Bennett looking at me from the corner of my eye, and he did not lift his gaze for quite some while. I tried to ignore it, but his interest was bothering me and intriguing me simultaneously. Perhaps more of the intrigue and less of the bother. "Wouldn't you say so, Bennett?" I asked suddenly, breaking him from his odd concentration on me.
"Y-Yes. I would indeed." He turned his head away, looking at the floor while I continued to stare up at the sky.
"The Resolve is a fine sea bird," I said, literally speaking to no one, for Bennett was probably still healing from his recent encounter with humility. "Like a sparrow." Like a certain Captain Jack Sparrow, I added to myself inwardly. "Drink up me hearties, yo ho."