Time Stands Still
Ellen had one of her secretaries send her letter to Eleanor to ensure she received it within hours of writing. Every moment they waited was another for the body of the young girl to begin decomposition. It was also another moment that Scarlett was alone and friendless.
Eleanor was alone in her greenhouse when she received Ellen's letter. Though she had met Scarlett only twice in the six or seven years Rhett and Scarlett had been married, she had loved Scarlett instantly. She knew it had taken a special kind of woman to tame her youngest son. She hadn't seen Scarlett since Bonnie's death and Rhett only sporadically so it came as a shock to discover Ella had been in Charleston almost a year and she had never known. Even more shocking was the news of the young girls death. She wondered if she would ever visit with Scarlett without the death of a child the cause.
Rhett had told his mother much about Scarlett over the years. Her bravery. Her sacrifice. Everything except Ashley. Eleanor knew that Scarlett, though strong had been through more than most with the war and wanted desperately to help her grieving daughter-in-law.
She sent servants out to prepare the formal arrangements for the funeral and sent a telegram to Rhett's lawyer so he could let her son know-wherever in the world he might be-that his daughter had died. She knew he would be distraught and hoped that Scarlett and Rhett would be some comfort to one another.
Before making her way to Madame Carrington's School for Young Girls, Eleanor instructed her housekeeper to ensure there was room for Scarlett in the guest quarters. She assumed Scarlett would want to settle here until arrangements for the funeral had been made.
Ellen Carrington had been at the school her entire life. As a child she was raised alongside the charges her mother cared for. Rarely could you find a women as well read and intelligent as Ellen, which is why she supposed, at 25 she had yet to find a husband. However, things like husbands and children had never bothered her much as she viewed the girls at her school as her children.
However, she often tried to distance herself from the dramas of the families that filled the halls of Madame Carrington's School for Young Ladies. So it was surprising to her how much she found herself caring what happened to the late Ella Kennedy's mother. Like most people in Charleston she was familiar with the rumors of Rhett Butler's past discretions. She supposed some of her fascination must have sprung from her curiosity over the woman that had gotten him to become a marrying man. She suspected though, it had to do with the hidden strength she had seen in Mrs. Butler's eyes the night her daughter died.
She knocked gently on the door to Scarlett's room after what she hoped was an appropriate amount of sleep, before slowing opening the door. "Mrs. Butler, are you awake? I don't mean to bother you, but-"
"It's quite alright Ms. Carrington. I understand. I've already sent a telegram to my lawyer, Henry. He will settle all the arrangements for me. I may have a head for numbers, but this is the last funeral I can plan."
Ellen hesitated before offering, "Would you care to go to for a walk? I've always found one refreshing in difficult times."
Scarlett thought for a moment, seriously considering telling this woman to leave well enough alone, but it had been so long since she'd had a true friend and confidante. At 30 years old she was no longer a child and had begun to regret her lack of connections. She turned to Ellen, flashing a bit of that old southern belle charm, "I'd be delighted."
The November afternoon was a perfect balance of warmth and wind. Though to be safe, both women opted to bring along a shawl in case the Autumn weather cooled down. They walked in silence before Scarlett commented off-handedly, "This neighborhood is just full of smaller versions of my home on Peachtree street."
"Indeed?" replied Ellen, "This style is becoming all the rage. It's quite modern to be able to select a house from a catalogue and have them build it for you. Personally, I prefer the more classic look of the typical southern plantation. I've always had a fondness for the great columns. I've never had the chance to visit Greece or Italy to visit the ruins, so I've contented myself with architecture inspired by their design."
"Tara was like that," Scarlett mentioned quietly.
"Pardon?"
"Sorry. Tara, my childhood home was like that. She was beautiful before the war," Scarlett said wistfully, "Nothing beats the beauty of Tara at sunset. The reds of the Georgia soil, the purples and oranges of the sky, and the green and white of the cotton in the background. I didn't understand until it was too late how important that land was…"
"It's sounds lovely," Ellen said enviously. "To be honest, I've never left the girl's school here. I've read every book scoured every travel periodical I could find, but I've never left Charleston. I feel as if I know the whole world but have never seen it."
Scarlett smiled, "You remind me of an old friend. He often lamented he was a man of books and fantasy, that he wasn't cut out to survive in a post-war world. To be honest, I saw him as weak. I've never thought much of books. Why waste time reading when you could be making money?"
Ellen laughed, "You're quite pragmatic! Have you had the opportunity to travel?"
"A bit," replied Scarlett, "Only the Southern states to visit family. I have always dreamed visiting Paris. I was always jealous that Rhett had taken Bonnie to Europe, but not me." She bit her lip at this part, she hadn't been expecting to reveal so much.
"Pardon my ignorance, but who was Bonnie? A relative? It seems odd he wouldn't take his wife with him."
They turned a corner, and finding a pleasant bench under aging Willow tree, decided to rest for a bit. It'd been months since Scarlett had been outside for any period of time, much less walked, and she found herself more tired than she expected. She winced before answering.
"Bonnie was our only daughter ...and I killed her." Scarlett was startled at the lack of emotion in her voice. Had she really buried her feelings that deep?
"My word! I'm so sorry to hear that, surely you didn't kill your own child?" Ellen was alarmed. Not only was Ella not her first child to die, but this woman believed she had murdered her own child!
Scarlett sighed, "It's more complicated than that, but truly, it feels as if I made it happen. There are so many things I could have, should have done different, but...I can't…"
Suddenly, Ellen had Scarlett in her arms, desperately wishing happiness for the woman who had so obviously been through more than her fair share of loss. Though unexpected, the action was not unwelcome and Scarlett found herself crying into Ellen's shoulder.
At that moment nothing mattered to Scarlett. For the first time in a long time she let the tears fall. She had spent so much time suppressing her feelings and pushing back her memories that at last they burst through her protective shell and Scarlett felt her loss full force. "I can't do it anymore," she gasped. "I can't stand it. First the war and Ma and Pa, and then everyone I knew as a child from home. Bonnie...Melly...Rhett….Ella. It's more than I can bear. I don't think I can continue."
Ellen just held Scarlett closer, unsure of what to say next or how to help the broken woman who had suddenly entered her life. It felt as if she had come into Scarlett's life at a time when they both needed a friend, and Ellen was determined to make things right.
"Come, let's go back to the school. We can have dinner in my rooms."