A/N: Warning for talk of medical procedures, and sexual acts.
"So, you've been here five days! How many more scans are they going to make you go through?" Amira asks, pouring another glass of water from a small plastic pitcher and handing it to Kurt. Kurt smiles wide when he takes it, which looks so bizarre to Sebastian, who isn't in the habit of smiling openly the way Kurt does over little things. It's appealing when Kurt is in his own body.
Since he's in Sebastian's body, however, Sebastian wants to tell Kurt to stop it.
"I have no idea, to tell you the truth," Kurt replies, sipping the cold water through a straw to keep from gulping it down too quickly. There have been several bizarre side-effects to the time he spent outside his soulmate's body. Extreme thirst is one. Double vision is another, and a mind-numbing headache, which he probably should have expected. Sebastian's body is playing catch up for all the time it has spent soulless, and Kurt is having a bit of a time navigating this new body that he's in, but that's not keeping the smile off of his – or Sebastian's – face. "They're pretty confident that everything's alright. I think they're just making sure that I don't dis-…run away again."
Kurt keeps stopping himself from saying disappear, because he almost did just that. Disappear. And as much as he's wanted to take a 24-hour nap every day since he's woken up, he can't convince himself to sleep longer than a few hours. What if his subconscious finds a way to disconnect from Sebastian's body and this time the separation is permanent? He can't take that chance, not when he finally has his soulmate.
Not when he has Sebastian.
"I bet you're itching to get out of here now that the two of you are together again," Camelia says, sitting beside Amira and taking her hand. Sebastian looks at the two of them sitting side by side. He's curious to bursting as to what the story is with the two of them. From idle small talk and a few unintentionally eavesdropped conversations, he knows that Amira's soulmate – Chelsea's dad – passed away almost immediately after Chelsea was born, and Camelia's husband – Lydia's dad – is not her soulmate. But these two women – like Chelsea and Lydia – seem made for each other.
After years of not wanting to have anything to do with soulmates, here he is mixed in with the most intriguing group of people on the soulmate spectrum. He can't help but wonder what would happen with Amira and Camelia if Camelia's husband were out of the picture…
"Sebastian?" He hears his name spoken as if it's being repeated for the second or third time.
He snaps his attention back to the current conversation, smirking wide on Kurt's face.
"Well, I'll tell you what I'm itching to get to…" he drawls.
"Sebastian!" Kurt exclaims, nearly spitting out his mouthful of water in the process.
Camelia and Amira titter, but Kurt looks appalled. Sebastian chuckles. It's funny seeing Kurt's indignant expression on his own usually cocky face. Oh, the expressions Sebastian didn't even know his face could make until Kurt woke up.
"I was going to say a shower, babe." Sebastian teases. "These clothes of yours are just about ripe. But it's nice to know where your mind's at."
Sebastian wiggles Kurt's eyebrows suggestively. Kurt morphs quickly from a look of indignation to embarrassment, cheeks coloring in a way Sebastian has never remembered blushing before.
Because Sebastian Smythe doesn't blush, but Kurt Hummel blushed more than anyone on human record.
"So, you…haven't seen me naked…yet?" he asks, lowering his voice to keep the ladies present in the room from hearing – not that it worked in the roughly ten foot space they sat gathered in.
"Well, I've taken a piss a few times, so I've seen the important parts," Sebastian says with a wink. Kurt moans and drops back on the bed, putting a hand to shield burning skin and squeezed shut eyelids, with Amira and Camelia laughing so hard beside them they can hardly catch a breath.
Sebastian walks up to the bed, to his completely mortified soulmate, and presses kisses to the hands obscuring the red face underneath.
"You know I'm just playing around, baby," he whispers.
Kurt mumbles something unintelligible but doesn't remove the hands.
Sebastian takes the chair closest to the head of the bed and sits down. Without the IV stuck in his arm or the breathing apparatus attached over his nose and mouth, it's easy for Sebastian to be confident that they'll be leaving the hospital soon, but so far the doctors seem to enjoy keeping them in the dark. Sebastian's certain that they're studying Kurt like a lab rat, trying to suss out the reason behind his vanishing act.
In Sebastian's brain, plans for Operation: Hospital Break-Out have begun.
"So, how are things with Lydia?" Sebastian asks as the two ladies begin to calm down.
"Oh," Camellia says, wiping the remaining tears from her eyes, "they're good. But like you guys, we're playing the waiting game."
"Yup," Amira adds. "Now that we're okay for the transplant, everything's at kind of a crawl."
"Really?" Sebastian pries one of the hands covering his face away and takes it, rubbing a thumb over the knuckles. He remembers how much Kurt liked that when they would walk hand-in-hand together and hopes it will pull him out of hiding. "I thought they just siphon the stuff out of Chelsea and stick it into Lydia."
"We wish," Amira says with a small, wistful smile. "Lydia had a minor procedure, so they have to wait for her to recover a little more from that before they actually get started."
"And then Chelsea has to have all sorts of tests done, too," Camelia supplies in the pause.
"But, they're soulmates…" Sebastian argues, wincing at the fact that it's an argument he wouldn't have relied on even a few days ago. But now, everything seems to depend on it.
"True," Amira continues, "but they have to screen her for a million and one things regardless. Lydia's immune system is going to be weak after they start the chemo. They can't take any chances."
"And that's a good thing," Kurt says, putting a supportive hand over the one currently crushing his other hand out of worry. "They need to make sure that Lydia's going to get better after the procedure, not worse."
"Yeah," Sebastian says, his voice uncharacteristically meek. When he went ahead with his plan to help the two girls, he didn't for one moment think of the specifics involved. Blood tests, chemotherapy, weeks, if not months in the hospital. Not that any of that would have changed his mind, it's just...Lydia looked so small in her bed, and Chelsea…
He wants them to be safe...and happy.
Sebastian swallows hard. Are all these saccharine emotions a consequence of being stuck in Kurt's body? After all, Kurt is the one with the big heart and the conscience, not him. He feels lips brush the hand he's using to grip at Kurt and he starts to relax.
"Mrs. Peterson?" A nurse peeks in through the curtain and calls out the name. "Mrs. Camelia Peterson?"
"That's me," she says, waving her hand and turning in her chair.
"So, Lydia's all set up in her permanent room," the nurse says, eyes bouncing from face to face staring back at her. "I can take you both up to see her now."
"Great," Camelia chirps with a giddy laugh, grabbing at Amira's hand and nearly lifting her from her seat. She rounds the end of Kurt's bed quickly and wraps Sebastian up in a hug. "Don't worry, sweetheart. It will all work out. We have strong girls." Camelia looks into exhausted blue eyes – blues eyes that don't quite match the soul inside – and kisses him on the forehead. Amira follows behind her and does the same while Kurt watches on, interested and entertained. Was this his cynical Sebastian commiserating over the fate of two teenaged girls? And without an inappropriate comment to be heard?
"Blessed be, ladies," Sebastian says with a wave good-bye.
"Blessed be," Amira says, waving at the two men and ducking out of the curtain.
"Blessed be, Sebastian," Camelia says. "And good-luck, Kurt. I hope they spring you soon."
Kurt waves at both ladies as they walk from the room, then turns his gaze on Sebastian, who's slumped in his chair, his mind working.
"She really got to you, huh?" Kurt asks.
"What?" Sebastian sits up straighter. "No. Well…maybe…"
"Don't sound so ashamed," Kurt says, reaching for the hand that had disappeared. "Caring about others is a good thing. My mom always said it was one of the reasons why we're here."
"Yeah?" Sebastian leans forward, taking the hand held out his way, leaning forward to kiss it gently. Well, I was thinking how sad it was, you know, to have someone you love being torn away and not being able to do anything to stop it." He looks up and catches Kurt gazing back at him with that smile that doesn't fit the face he's in. "I didn't want to be the kind of man who could walk away and do nothing."
Sebastian kisses Kurt again and a single image flashes through Kurt's mind.
Sebastian - standing between him and a gun.
"Look…if you have to shoot someone - fine. Shoot me. Let my friend go."
Kurt smiles. Sebastian could never be a man who'd walk away from injustice.
"And that's why I love you, Sebastian Smythe," Kurt whispers.
Kurt can feel Sebastian smile against the skin of the hand he's kissing.
"Say it again?" he asks sweetly, adding another kiss.
"I love you, Sebastian," Kurt says.
Sebastian looks at Kurt with a devilish twinkle in borrowed blue eyes.
"I always knew you did," Sebastian says.
"Really?" Kurt scoffs when Sebastian doesn't return the sentiment. "And what else do you know?"
"I know that you smell like jasmine and oranges," he whispers, moving his way up the arm before him with the bare brush of soft lips. "And that your skin feels like silk."
"An-and what else?" Kurt asks as that mouth continues its journey closer to the lips quivering around Kurt's words.
"That you taste like coffee and cinnamon," Sebastian whispers. "I can't wait for us to change back so I can prove that I'm right."
Kurt sucks in a broken breath when lips kiss him lightly and sparks ignite all around.
"I…I don't want to wait," Kurt says.
Sebastian stops, moving around to look at Kurt with wide eyes.
"What do you mean?" he asks.
"I mean, I don't want to wait till we switch back to…" Kurt pauses. He's never been comfortable talking about sex, and asking for it is nearly unthinkable, but this is Sebastian. His soulmate. The man who knows more about him than anyone. The man who was willing to give up his own life to save Kurt's. After his ordeal in the void, Kurt knows it's time for his irrational fears to end. "I want to make love to you."
"Really?" Sebastian asks, grinning like an idiot.
"Yeah," Kurt answers with a nod. "As soon as possible."
Sebastian rushes forward and kisses him – a press of lips against lips, nothing overly romantic but exciting nonetheless. He pulls away and stumbles to the curtain with Kurt giggling behind him.
"Nurse!" Sebastian yells. "Nurse! We need the doctor now!"
"I'll be honest," Dr. Samon – a different doctor from the night when Kurt first came in – says, "we would like to keep him for observation a few more days."
"A-ha," Sebastian mutters as he throws a t-shirt over Kurt and helps maneuver the arm on the injured side into the arm hole. It's a new shirt Sebastian bought down at the hospital gift shop out of desperation. He didn't want to waste time racing to his penthouse for a change of clothes. His original button-down shirt with the bullet hole in it had been stuffed in a plastic bag and shoved into a police evidence locker downtown, and therefore unavailable for Kurt to wear. Kurt pulls out the hem of the too-large shirt to look down at the pastel pink material, and frowns at the brighter pink silk-screened words It's a girl! with their accompanying cartoon stork.
"Seb!" Kurt whines, holding the end down taut for Sebastian to see.
"It's the only thing they had," Sebastian responds, which is mostly true. The other option was a pastel blue shirt that said It's a boy! Sebastian thought this shirt would be funnier. "No one will see it under my jacket."
"But seeing as we can find nothing on the scans that we need to worry about," the doctor continues despite the fact that neither man seems to be paying any attention, "and your gunshot wound is healing up nicely, I suppose there's no harm in releasing you."
"Super," Sebastian says, moving on to socks and shoes.
"Is there anything I should…avoid…while this gunshot wound heals?" Kurt asks, fishing to see if the doctor will say that sex is off the menu for now.
God, he hopes he doesn't.
"Avoid moving it too much, leaning on it, lifting heavy objects, that sort of thing. Your paperwork will give you a list of activities to avoid or modify. As you know, bonded people tend to recover from injury quicker, but don't over exert yourself. And follow up with your doctor in a couple of days."
Kurt nods.
"Thank you, doctor," he says.
Sebastian growls and Kurt giggles like a teenager.
The doctor sighs knowingly.
"I'll get the nurse to bring in your discharge forms," he says in a flat tone before he leaves.
If not for a healing gunshot wound and an overwhelming pervasive stench of BO, Sebastian would have been all over Kurt on the cab ride to his penthouse. Sebastian does spend the whole ride kissing Kurt, closing his eyes to overlook the fact that they're his own lips he's kissing, his own neck he's sucking marks into, and the whimpers coming from Kurt's mouth are mostly comprised of his own voice. When they get to Sebastian's penthouse, they are stymied momentarily by the journey from the car to the elevator and then up to his place.
They hit the bathroom first for a much needed shower. As sensual and romantic as Sebastian tries to make it, it doesn't feel the way he imagined showering with Kurt would feel. Yes, this is Kurt moaning at his touch, encouraging him with returned kisses and contented hums, but in his body. It plays out like a kinky sex dream – erotic, but not quite idyllic. But Kurt wants this as much as he does, and Sebastian will take Kurt any way he can get him, in any form.
Sebastian soaps his own body down, concentrating his kisses and touches on those place that make him weak at the knees, sure that his body still reacts the same with Kurt inside of it. Whether it's out of an intricate knowledge of his own erogenous zones or inexperience on Kurt's part, Kurt writhes with head thrown back, nails scratching at the bathroom tile, breathing open-mouthed into the heated air around them.
Not until they move from the shower to the bed does Kurt become shy. Sebastian reaches for the erection growing between them, and behind lust-blown eyes, Kurt pulls back a bit.
"We don't have to do this if you're still not ready," Sebastian says, even with the body around him begging to be touched and kissed. Making love is an emotional act, but sex is physical, and having not experienced it yet, Kurt's virgin body screams for release with Sebastian locked inside, suffering that torture. "We can wait until we swap back."
"I do want to," Kurt says, looking up into his own eyes, but more and more seeing only Sebastian. "I'm just nervous. I've dreamt so long about being with you…"
"You have?" Sebastian cuts in with surprise.
"Of course I have," Kurt says, "but this is not exactly how I pictured it. It's a little bit weird…and interesting."
"Yeah," Sebastian agrees. "I mean, I knew I was hot and all, but I didn't realize how hot." Sebastian stares down the length of his own naked, wet body stretched out beneath him and whistles low. "Damn."
"Sebastian!" Kurt squeals, shaking his head.
Sebastian laughs, pressing kisses to the skin he can reach, trying to help Kurt relax.
"That's not the only thing," Kurt admits. "There's also…you know…mechanics…and stuff…"
Kurt's sentence is a stuttering string of words punctuated in each pause by a deeper and deeper blush, and Sebastian pretends to be offended.
"Well, sweetheart," Sebastian says, pointing at Kurt, "that body is strictly a top."
"Not today it's not," Kurt laughs - a nervous laugh, not a teasing one.
"You don't want to give it a try?" Sebastian asks. "I mean, there's nothing to it. Just stick tab A into slot B and repeat…a lot."
Kurt chuckles, rolling green eyes to stare up at the ceiling above Sebastian.
"If it makes you feel any better," Sebastian continues, "I've never bottomed before."
"Why not?" Kurt asks.
"It didn't interest me." Sebastian shrugs. "It seemed a little too intimate. All of my hook-ups were about getting off, and that didn't seem like the easiest way."
Kurt nods, lower lip caught between white teeth as he thinks of a way to respond without showing his jealousy.
"And now?" Kurt asks.
"And now I want to do everything, try anything, as long as I get to do it with you."
Sebastian looks down at Kurt with honest, sincere eyes, and Kurt smiles.
"That was a good answer," he says, reaching an arm up to pull Sebastian close and kiss him softly.
"So, how do you want to do this?" Sebastian asks, still hovering, making sure not to lean his weight on a chest with bones that are still healing.
"Well, there's very little I can do except lie completely still that isn't going to hurt like hell," Kurt laughs.
"Then go ahead and lie still," Sebastian says, reaching to his bed side dresser for a bottle of lube and a condom. "You don't have to do anything."
"Well, I'd like to be an active participant," Kurt says.
"You will, baby," Sebastian says. "I just don't want this to hurt." Sebastian settles down in front of Kurt, skillfully rolling a condom on the hard-on Kurt is sporting and covering him with lube while Kurt watches. While Sebastian strokes Kurt, kissing trembling lips and swallowing every moan, he thinks. He doesn't want to hurt Kurt's body in any way. He's going to need to open him up carefully so he doesn't tear anything. He breaks away from Kurt's kisses, leaving him with a small whimper. He reaches back into his dresser and pulls out a small, smooth metal plug. Kurt watches him with interest as he lubes it up and hands it over to his soulmate.
"Uh, where am I supposed to put this?" Kurt asks, looking over the obsidian-colored object dripping with lube.
"Where do you think?" Sebastian asks, toying with Kurt purposefully, loving the expression of surprise Kurt gives him before he rolls to face away.
"You want me to stick this into my body?" Kurt asks, looking from the plug, to his own ass that Sebastian has bent at the waist and put on display for him, and then back to the plug.
"Well, sweetheart, you've never done this before," Sebastian explains with a condescending lilt. "It's kind of a necessary evil if we want things to go smoothly."
Kurt looks at the plug with an eyebrow raised.
"Okay, wait a minute," he says. Sebastian sighs in exasperation at being made to wait. "If you're a top, who was the last person who used this?"
"It's mine, sweetheart," Sebastian answers. "Just because I don't let other guys fuck me like that doesn't mean I don't play with myself."
Kurt swallows hard at the mention of other men but he says nothing. He walked into that. Sebastian turns slightly to look at Kurt.
"Would you feel better if I did it to start and you watched?" he asks, reaching back for the small device.
"Yes," Kurt says, mesmerized as Sebastian takes the metal plug and searches out his entrance with gentle fingers. Sebastian circles the puckered hole with an index finger still coated in lube and moans, and Kurt is struck absolutely dumb. It's his body Sebastian is playing with, his voice making those heavenly noises, but it's Sebastian performing these acts, Sebastian enjoying his body's response to them. A strange mixed sensation of jealousy, need and want grows inside Kurt's mind as he watches the care Sebastian takes prepping his entrance, gently gauging his body's reaction to the plug being slipped inside, and then moving it in and out, back and forth, so that Kurt, just a spectator, can feel it mirrored in the body that he's in – a body that knows more than his own about pleasing men and what it feels like to be pleased by men. The nerves around him remember and they react.
He can feel his own body on the brink even though he has yet to lay a finger on it.
"Come on, baby," Sebastian gasps with another twist of the plug. "Are you going to join in on this? Because I'm almost done here."
Sebastian felt bad doing this at the start. He felt like he was taking away Kurt's first time, which had never been his intention. So many times, sex had been an act for him, and he never gave any thought to anything but his own pleasure. But this experience is supposed to be for Kurt. This is his first time, and here Sebastian was, taking it from him, masturbating with his body, which Sebastian swore he would never do.
But Kurt and Sebastian are soulmates. Their bodies respond to one another on a completely different level than all those randoms he had been with it. He not only feels the sensation of turning Kurt's body on, he can feel the way Kurt, watching him, has immediately become aroused. Kurt's cock, throbbing and pulsing between his legs, is more affected by him watching Sebastian than from the actual experience of it.
Every response Sebastian feels is entirely Kurt's doing.
He needs Kurt now. He needs them to come together, but Kurt isn't exactly sure what Sebastian is asking him to do. He feels Kurt's uncertainty in his head and in his heart, so Sebastian moves toward him, tossing the plug aside and positioning himself against the cock hard against his back. Slowly Sebastian slides down over it, inch by inch to get accustomed to the stretch, to the feeling of being full, of being complete. Sebastian presses against him, back to front, and Kurt loops an arm around him. Kurt holds Sebastian for a moment, holds on to the feeling of them sharing heat, breathing together, heartbeats racing or slowing to match one another.
"Can I move?" Sebastian asks, kissing up the arm draped across him.
Kurt holds on tighter and nods.
Sebastian starts to move against him and Kurt's gasps turn into full-fledged moans.
"Oh…oh my…oh God," he stammers, too astounded to move. "Oh, Sebastian…why didn't…why didn't we do this before?"
Sebastian has a million answers for that question – some of them sarcastic, some of them honest. But the only one that matters is that Kurt had an image of what his first time would be like, and that image included a yet to be named soulmate.
Sebastian loved him too much to besmirch that image.
Something builds between them as Sebastian moves and Kurt's grip grows stronger – an energy that gets lost for moments between Kurt's shudders and Sebastian chanting Kurt's name. He reaches a hand back to pull Kurt closer, fitting them both together.
It sounds like a clap of thunder in his ears, and the heat that radiates from his and Sebastian's body is so incredibly intense that at first Kurt wants to pull away from it, but then a new sensation overwhelms him, of every molecule in his body being taken apart and rearranged.
For a second, he fears he's transporting back into the dark.
Sebastian understands this new feeling first, and when the dull pain in his arm returns, and the tightness around his cock replaces what seconds ago was a fullness in his borrowed body, he switches gears to keep Kurt from losing the orgasm that had been building within him.
"Sebastian!" He hears the voice echo in his ears in all of its sweet brilliance, its lyrical perfection. He wraps his arm around his soulmate, holding on as he pounds into Kurt's body – Kurt's body with Kurt back inside – deeper and deeper, driving him closer to the edge of what feels like madness, a glorious and all-encompassing insanity.
Sebastian sinks his mouth over Kurt's neck and wraps his fingers around Kurt's cock, pushing and pulling until the resulting orgasm rises up Kurt's body and rips from his throat with a scream.
"Oh, God! Sebastian!" he groans as he feels Sebastian lose control, biting down gently into his shoulder, his hips stuttering and halting, grunts fading down his throat.
Kurt raises his hands in front of his eyes, threading his fingers into his hair, looking around him.
"Sebastian," Kurt pants, "Are you…"
"Yeah," Sebastian says, pecking light kisses down Kurt's neck, "yeah, I'm me again."
Kurt cranes his neck for more kisses, leaning his body back for more touches, wanting more of Sebastian around him.
"Oh my…oh my God," Kurt sighs, leaning his forehead into the pillow beneath him. "Is it always like that?"
"Like what?" Sebastian asks, resting his head against Kurt's spine, hearing his heart pound.
"Amazing," Kurt says. "Incredible. Was it always like that for you?"
Sebastian swallows down a small wave of shame, pushing it back with kisses to Kurt's back, the sweat on his tongue filling his mouth with the taste of coffee and cinnamon.
"Not even close," Sebastian says.