CHAPTER 2: BEND:
"Alright this is going to be painful." Genkai chuckled.
"Hmm, just so long as one of us enjoys it, ne?" I laughed as well before settling back against the floor.
The waiting was the hardest part. I was able to relax into the sting of the blade as Genkai began cutting the ward into my skin. I'm sure I would have had this problem eventually or something of a similar nature, as my Youko Ki recovered from my spirit transfer. An ancient Kitsune's full Ki in a human body, a teenaged body at that, it would be very hard to explain. Bloody tournament. I could have lost everything. In that one moment, forcibly reverted to my demon form.
"Breathe Kurama. Unconscious will be no help." Genkai cut through my reverie, her voice lacked her usual sarcasm.
I blinked affirmation with an amused smile and concentrated on finding a rhythm that would fit with her delicate work. I like Genkai; it is a comfort to be around those who have age, maturity. I like the teens, Yusuke and Kuwabara and the girls, but they are still so young and innocent. So much they have yet to experience, to suffer. There was a sadness in her though, she was tired and willing to leave life after Yusuke had succeeded in passing her final test. I understand that as well, living can wear one out. It was a good exit, but we couldn't let her go, not just yet not when the opportunity to have her back was handed to us...Even Hiei, the recalcitrant bastard, assented readily. Well I have enough Ki to share to ease the strain of old age. Share, now there is a concept that would have been alien to my nature not long ago. Ah Mother, the gifts you have given me. Inari make me worthy of them.
"Okay I'm moving down for the last one." there was an edge to her voice, as she pulled up my shirt to start work just below my navel. I unbuttoned the waistband of my jeans letting it fall open.
I waited for the cutting to resume. Stinging warmth at my throat, almost overriding the new injury, "I appreciate you accepting this arrangement Genkai."
"Hmph. Keep the hormonal teens from going mad." Her hand paused a moment, as she took a deep breath. My hand touched her free hand, a gesture of comfort.
"That as well." I said gently, "It is hard to let go of friends. We were selfish...greedy..."
"Think nothing of it Boy. You kids are my solace." She looked irritated at the sentiments, shaking her head, her voice gruff, "I'm too old for this. You tell anyone I've gone soft and I'll snatch you bald." She squeezed my hand before getting back to work.
"For the sake of my hair, I never saw a thing." I winked at her, steeling myself to the pain. After long tight minutes I felt her sit back the blade having made the last cut. I picked up the salve; it stung but dried the wounds leaving them open, blood free.
"My turn." Genkai placed the blade in my hand as I sat up. She removed her shirt and lay on her stomach exposing her back. Her age shows in the loss of suppleness in the skin, so thin and clear you can trace the veins easily. But the muscles are still firm if stringy, the bones strong from years of fighting, training. There is a vitality as well more pronounced than any normal human's from the long mastery of Ki. My fingers stroked over an old scar, thin, white and nearly invisible. It crosses from the left shoulder to her right hip, "Lover's quarrel." the sorrow was back in her voice. We all have painful secrets. I haven't met anyone without a scar or two.
"I'm starting now." I say setting the tip of the blade on her skin. The anchor ward takes shape in the middle of her back, when I'm finished it's the size of a compact disc. My face relaxes, I realized I was wincing for her the whole time. I blotted her blood from the shallow wound, drying it so it will be ready for the close of the ritual, "Ready for the big finish?" She nodded, her whole form relaxed almost somnolent, as she sat up on her knees.
I started the song, the words that would bind this agreement; she turned to face me, taking the blade to cut her finger, filling my wards with her blood. Finished she hands the blade back and I slit open my index finger letting the blood well a moment before tracing the fine lines of her ward to fill them. The blood glowed with the power of the ritual, I feel its warmth on my body. The song ended and I smile slyly, Inari be proud. The gift is accepted.
"The blood should be allowed to dry." I picked up some gauze and cleaned the cut on my finger, then wrapped it so it will stay clean until it seals. Taking her hand to tend her finger, "I would be honored if you would come to Tea on Sunday. Mother insists I bring my Sensei and my friends over so she can meet them."
"Told her something of your real life finally." She gave a gruff chuckle as I nodded, "When did I take on a new student?"
I chuckled giving her my best 'melt hearts smile', "A bit presumptive of me I know, but your defeat of Suzuki and his poster boy made me realize I was woefully undertrained. Hiei is still trying to figure out how he missed seeing you take off that rubber nose. Though if another student would be a bother."
She gave me an impassive look, not falling for my smile, which makes me grin for real, "Why not it would be nice to meet a woman of sense. I'll give you three months, then you're out on your ear."
"Hai." I nodded and held up her shirt, before moving around behind her with the antiseptic, my fingers nimble and light, "Do you want gauze over this?"
"No." She slipped her shirt on rising, "Clean up and get out of here. And don't come back for two days." She walked out lighting a cigarette.
I smiled and did as bidden; a good student is obedient.
The sun has been down a few hours, the air cool hinting of Fall. I sauntered home, tired but satisfied. The solution to my excessive Ki problem neatly tied up. It is important that the nature of my Ki is concealed. With Genkai's help the energy has a place to go, a use yet is still available should circumstances arise where I need it. In three months if not sooner she'll realize the 'loaned' Ki will be hers to use as she will until the end of her life, not as I suggested that the loan would only be for three months. Three months, it isn't a lie the scars would only remain on my skin three months. I could have done something else, buried the energy in the gardens and parks around my home, a combination of suppression and reduction wards, but I preferred this solution. It is balanced. My secret in wise hands.
"Hey pretty lady how much to party?" The drunk and foolishly horny young men had made a mistake of gender and vocation.
I stopped and blinked a moment, realizing I was too deep in thought and didn't hear the car pull alongside of me, foolish. I turned with a smirk, too tired to play this game, "Sorry boys, no time to party." I opted to play a different game, and with a grin I hit them with a blast of Ki, pure pounding climax. I walk off as the driver slammed on the brakes as he stiffened in the throes of orgasm. They'd all need a shower and a nap when the blast fades, in a few minutes. That was fun. Haven't done that in years, the things you learn from plants. Horny, drunk, young men. Horny, hn, when was the last time I was horny? Ages and ages. One of the benefits of my age, the passions of the body don't rule, well not too often. I'm going to have to reconsider my wardrobe, maybe if I wore a dress people would mistake me for a man. Funny. Mother would be amused, her son the transvestite. Nah the heels would be hell to run in.
Mother, Shiori, miracle of rare device, well all I have left of that miracle of rare device. Father, was part of that miracle. Lost to me without a chance to fight against that loss. I wonder Father would you be proud of me? I hope you would. I didn't deserve such a miracle; I was selfishly trying to avoid dying, having to face my karma. Loving parents, ah Inari your gifts always come with a trick. Humans have such brief lives... I couldn't bear the cold, my life ebbing away with the beating of my heart my approaching death as cold as my life. That realization hurt, I saw the emptiness of my life, how empty I had allowed it to be, I wanted to feel warmth. I hid in my arrogance, lied to myself that I refused to die in such an ignoble fashion, and flung myself at the opportunity to cheat defeat, to recover and resume my glorious Youko form. The lies we tell ourselves to have the courage to reach for our dreams.
I walked on, mind calm, avoiding the direction my thoughts bend with increasing frequency as of late. With a sigh I gave in, Hiei.
Ch', the day he appeared in my life. My body was still young, nine, didn't stop him trying to kill me though. I was very lucky he was already tired and injured. I'd have killed him if I hadn't seen the sorrow in his eyes as he slid into unconsciousness. I knew that look; I couldn't kill him, we were kindred souls. Besides the shock on his face when he woke up in the shelter I created in the park, brief though it was, was priceless. I left him to recover, planning on never seeing him again. Despite truly wanting to see him again. Too dangerous for Mother and myself to have a youkai know where I was living. Inari, I was angry when he dropped in front of me in my backgarden. I tried to skewer him to the fence with tree branches, but he managed to step out of the way.
"So the great Youko Kurama hides in the Ningenkai?" He was cold, dispassionate in tone and stance but there was a glint in his eye, I could see there was a fascination as he compared the legend with the pissed off nine year old body. If it had been me I would have laughed.
"Live not hide." My tone was as cold as I could make it. I bet I squeaked too young to be commanding as I tried to growl, "Stay out of my territory."
"Hn. I'll let you live until you're old enough to defend your claim. We'll settle it then." The glint remained but his voice was derisive.
"Fine." I was still annoyed, sorry now I hadn't just followed the practical solution, "What's your name tenant?"
A flicker of amusement crossed his face, so fast I almost doubted it, "Hiei. Kurama." Then he was gone.
I didn't see him again for years, I felt his Ki around in the city from time to time, never near the house again though. I really didn't think much of it; I was busy with Mother, and my life as Shuuichi. Actually, I was busy coming to terms with not wanting to go back to being Youko Kurama. Busy becoming Kurama/Shuuichi. I'd found the warmth my life had lacked, as much as I don't deserve it I couldn't just abandon it. As it was I almost lost it. Mother developed an illness, I was fifteen when it finally defeated all my skill and became terminal.
Hiei popped back up, some highly ridiculous plan for dominating Ningenkai by stealing some Reikai artifacts. I didn't really care, I was going to say fuck off, but he mentioned the Forlorn Hope. My grief frozen memory melted, I saw light at the end of the tunnel. I agreed, not really giving a damn about all his plans. I could save her, and the price wasn't nearly enough to cover what I owed. I never realized how calm, competent one could appear in the midst of utter despair, on the brink of madness. Inari, I am humbled by your divine joke. Mother was healed, and the artifact spared my life. It was the first unselfish act I had ever committed; I still don't understand why I was rewarded.
But...Hiei. I couldn't leave him in the grip of that artifact. I was... saving him... for me. Kindred spirit, I couldn't just walk away...He was angry when he was sentenced to indefinite parole with the Reikai Tantei. I couldn't blame him; no one likes to be defeated by a lucky shot. Shortly thereafter I apologized for taking advantage of his plans. For my betrayal. For abandoning him to the artifact's control, I had known more about them than I let on when he had come to me about it. I got his trademark snort, but he started coming to me for shelter when the weather was bad, or he was injured, or as of late just for companionship. So he must have forgiven me. Not that I'm complaining, he is comfortable to be around. Despite his surly silence and nearly constant irritation.
When did wanting Hiei start? Aargh. I don't know, perhaps I've always wanted him. Perhaps he's just the one who is close, mature enough to tempt me now. That is probably the truth of it. I'm lonely and he is available. I'm such a selfish bastard. I have a miserable history with sex. I became frozen not finding much to desire. That is until now, since a certain fire demon came into my life. The myth of Kurama the Seducer was largely built on the Ki trick, and wishful thinking. Maybe...maybe I could really care about him...
In my second childhood I grew up loved, protected. I've learned to love, but I will never be innocent. Always overshadowed by my past. The gifts of unconditional love I've gained from Mother and Father I hold dear. I am too aware of the fragility of those gifts and too afraid to lose them again. If I get hurt will I become the frozen creature I was before? What if I'm truly fickle and faithless? I could hurt him too... I'm such a fool; it should be enough that we are friends.
But I can't make myself stop wanting him. I need the mad courage of ignorance. Ah Inari...