Disclaimer: VoldemortsLemming doesn't own yugioh

Hello, well yes this story was just going to be a oneshot with one chapter etc, but er. . . I sortof wrote another one while I was bored one day. . .heh! :)

2. The Chapter which Kaiba doesn't confess his secret lust for Yugi but embarrasses himself muchly by farting instead.

Seto Kaiba needed to fart.
He could feel it welling up inside him and he knew, if anything, it was going to be a biggen!
'Damn,' he thought privately inside one of the many computer filled rooms that was his mind, 'It just so happens to want to escape when I'm in the middle of very important duel with Yugi, of all people!'
"What's wrong Kaiba?" Came the scornful voice of the Pharaoh from the other side of the arena, "got no worthy moves left?
"Yugi," (every sentence starts with this name, one would think he was just ever so slightly obsessed. In fact, at this very moment fans all over the world are waiting excitedly for him to confess their forbidden love, but of course he's not going to because that would be boring.) Kaiba stopped, obviously searching his vocabulary for a suitable word. Dog, punk, duel, technical computer jargon, dog, geek, Mokuba, dog, virtual duel system, dog, more complicated computer jargon and lastly, dog. Nope, none of them would service, although he was quite tempted to call Yugi a dog for some strange reason. . .

~ A CD player pops onto the sidelines and starts playing Marilyn Manson – This is Halloween.Marik Ishtar stepped out of the shadows.

A psychotic grin played across his face.

A bloodstained millennium rod in one hand.

A billowing cloak, fastened by means of a great chain (otherwise known as 'evil bling') billowed.

Serenity fainted.

Marik strode across to the viewing gallery (if that's what its called) in three great strides, turned, and showed off his facial veins to the camera for no apparent reason. The camera cracked slightly.

~The track changed to Bee Gees – staying Alive.Marik looked awkward, obviously he had forgotten what was on that CD. . .

"Can someone smash that CD before I go insane!!" Shouted Seto. Someone happily obliged. There was a cold silence in which Tristen (who had been busy singing along in a tuneless falsetto) suddenly noticed that everyone was staring at him and consequentially turned an unattractive shade of red that had all the delight of a beetroot.
"That's better!" Sighed Seto with an air of someone who was deeply troubled by a personal reason that they didn't want to share with the rest of the world just quite yet.
He would have to share it sooner or later though and he knew it.
It came sooner then he would've liked.

Silence.

A very shocked silence.

After a while Mokuba spoke, his voice trembling slightly.
"B b b big brother? Did you just fart?"

Everyone held their breath. Good thing they did too because the smell. . . well lets just say Kaiba had had beans for breakfast, I'll leave the rest to the imagination. . .
seto Kaiba honestly didn't know what to say, for once he just wished he could shrink away into the background, but of course he couldn't because he's the main character in this fanfiction.

Yugi giggled nervously.

Kaiba tried to regain his reputation by walking up to his arch enemy and kicking him as hard as he could in 'the place where the sun don't shine'. (All over the world men are clutching themselves and cringing at the thought.) he promptly got arrested for child abuse.
A wad of something suspiciously paper-thin passed between him and the guard.
"I'm sorry Mr Kaiba Sir, I must have been mistaken." The guard tugged at his collar sheepishly, a trickle of sweat making its way down his forehead as he spoke.

The sweat had a name.

It was called sweatdrop.

But that's not really important.

"Yes," said Kaiba coldly, "you where mistaken, now get out of my sight before you contaminate my eyes!" The guard took the hint and the cash and ran for it.

Sweatdrop fell to the floor and died.

Kaiba looked down at the crumpled heap that was Yugi. He prodded him slightly with a commanding toe in a way which quite obviously screamed 'I have more money then you!'
"You bastard!" Shouted Yugi, his face screwed up in pain, "I haven't even reached puberty yet!"
"Good! Serves you right for not reaching it then! You slow developers make me sick."
"Erm, big bro? Doesn't everything to do with anyone make you sick?"
"shut up Mokuba!"
"Ok!"
"SETO KAIBA HAS A SMALL PENIS!" Someone shouted from nowhere in particular.
"OK WHO SAID THAT???"

A crazy demented fangirl of doom stepped out of the lift.

"Its true you know!" She said.
"Yea . . . WHAT???!!! HOW THE HELL DO YOU KNOW?"
"Us fangirls know everything! She announced knowingly. Pulling off an extremely cheesy wink as she did so.

Everyone shifted uncomfortably as the conversation when from bad to worse.

Someone led Mokuba away.

Seto Kaiba was very, very disturbed by now.

". . . and if you really want proof that I was there then watch this video I made." She ended, proudly brandishing a video camera. Joey lent over the side of the blimp and vomited. . .

. . . someone far bellow was very unlucky. . .

* * * *

After the day was over Kaiba sat in his all powerful throne and thought about the day's events, his mind still greatly disturbed against his will.

Yugi didn't move all night.
Tea stayed with him and talked about friendship.
Joey and Tristen ate food.
Serenity got up, saw Yugi and fainted again.
And Marik stared up at his ceiling, seeing how long it could hold out against his psychotic face.

No one even noticed that Someone had kidnapped Mokuba. . .

Don't expect any more chapters, but if I write any more then I write some more. . . I might do ^_~

Mysti AKA 'Wax'