Disclaimer: I do not own the characters of PoT
A strong force caused her to stumble forward and fall on her knees. When she looked behind, there was so much blood. It was a dreadful sight to behold and in the middle of all the commotion was a body lying unconscious in the middle of the street.
It was a painful memory but the scene just kept repeating in Sae's dreams from time to time.
"It's that dream again, wasn't it?"
A feminine voice took her off her thoughts.
"Yumiko nee-san…" There was an underlying sadness as the brunette girl called her name.
Yumiko smiled kindly to her. She was treating her same as before like Sae had nothing to do with what happened to her brother. The younger girl was thankful but still, she cannot shake the thought that it was because of her that Fuji's life was in danger. At the back of her mind, she knew that it should had been her in that hospital bed and not him. If he had not saved her that time…
"Sae," Yumiko held at the girl's shoulders sympathetically, "Syuusuke has not gain consciousness yet but he's out of danger. He will be fine."
"I'm sorry."
"How many times do I have to tell you? It's not your fault."
"Even so, if I had been careful…"
Yumiko shook her head. "If you were in his position, I believe you will do the same."
Yumiko held at the girl's shoulders sympathetically, "it's getting late." Only then that the younger girl noticed the rays of the setting sun illuminated the room.
Sae's hospital visits became part of her daily routine since that day. She would usually sat by his side and talked to him believing that he can hear him, hoping for him to wake up anytime soon.
"Yumiko-nee-san," sadness can be heard as Sae called her name, "please let me stay a little longer. We don't have class tomorrow anyway."
"Don't push yourself too hard." Yumiko sighed and walked to the door. "I'll just buy you something to drink."
"Thank you very much."
After being left alone, she just stared at Fuji's face, praying for him to open his eyes. It had been days but still, there was no sign of Fuji gaining consciousness anytime soon. Her attention turned to his fingers, as she traced the lines on his palm while reminiscing how that same hand saved her. She wanted to feel his touch, to hear his voice again.
Fuji's vision was blurred by the light that hit his eyes. His eyes took a moment before he recognized the person sitting next to him. As his sight returned to focus, the first person that he saw was her.
"… Sae…"
He called her name to be sure but when he did, her shocked face amused him.
"Have I been sleeping for a long time?"
Instead of answering his question, Sae reached out her hand, fingers trembling, and touched his face, just to make sure that it was really happening. Her eyes were filled with tears threatening to fall any minute.
"Syuusuke."
Hearing his voice again, Sae fought the urge to throw her arms around him. When Fuji's expression relaxed to his usual smile, tears streak down her cheek.
"I thought I heard you call my name." With his feeble strength, Fuji entwined his fingers with hers. "Did you cut your hair?"
The girl answered with a nod. "Does it look weird?"
"It suits you." His attention was caught by what Sae was wearing. "It looks like I've been sleeping for quite some time."
"You've been sleeping for a month."
"I see. That's a long time."
"I'm sorry. It's all my—"
Thud
The sound of something hard hit the floor called their attention.
"Syu-Syuusuke!" Yumiko's voice echoed all throughout the room. Before either of them could react, Yumiko was already hugging her brother back.
Sae too wanted to do the same earlier but stopped herself. She remained on her spot as she watched how Yumiko's eyes were filled with tears of joy. Seeing those two together like that, Sae left the room as quietly as she could, for she could not find the courage to interrupt.
The next day
Sae sigh as she looked at the large bag she was carrying. Menno got carried away and send her different kinds of food to give to Fuji, although she doubts he will be able to eat all of those.
Flashback
"Good morning Nanako-nee-san."
"You seem happy today. Did something good happen?"
"Fuji-senpai woke up yesterday."
"That's great news! You've been looking glum since he was hospitalized. What do you plan to do now?"
"I'm going to visit him again today. I have to properly thank him somehow."
"Then let me make something for him."
End of flashback
As she stood outside Fuji's room, Sae stopped on her track as cheerful voices escaped the slightly open door. Sae peeked inside and saw Fuji happily talking with An Tachibana.
"When did those two became so close?"
The excitement she had a moment ago was replaced by a throbbing pain in her chest the moment she saw him smiling at An. She felt irritated, but then, she became startled by the realization.
She had nothing against An Tachibana. On the contrary, she had been a good friend with the Seigaku boys' tennis club. At the very least, she should be happy for them if something was going on between her and anyone in her team but knowing it was Syuusuke whom she was with, Sae cannot help but have this unpleasant feeling.
"Sae, what are you doing there?" She almost jumped at Yuuta's question.
"Yuuta. I remember I have something to do. Can you give these to your brother?"
Sae handed him the bag Menno gave her.
"But don't you want to see Aniki? He's awake now."
"It seems that he has a lot of visitors today. I'll just drop by again tomorrow. Just tell him I said 'hi'."
Sae's mind was filled with thoughts of Syuusuke and An, that she did not notice someone familiar passing her way.
The girl's green eyes scanned the panorama of the surrounding area from the top of the hospital building.
"Why? Do I…"
Sae placed her hand gently over her chest. She can feel her heart beating loudly. However, together with her pounding heart, a dull pain was in there.
"Could it be that I've really fallen for him?" She smiled bitterly as she mentally slapped herself. "Is that why I'm hurting like this?" The hand that was previously on her chest slowly covered her mouth to prevent her from sighing. "If not, why is he affecting me like this?"
"Sae."
A deep voice startled her thoughts.
"Captain, you're here too?"
"I saw you when I visited Fuji. You seem to be in deep thoughts. Is there something wrong?"
Sae shook her head slowly. "It's nothing you should worry about."
"Is it about Fuji and Tachibana's sister?" Tezuka saw An Tachibana walked out of Fuji's room before he entered.
Sae stared wide-eyed at Tezuka hearing that he hit the mark. She diverted her gaze before she spoke. "You're right. It's just that… I realized something." A bitter smile played on her lips as her eyes met Tezuka's. "I-It's painful to see them together."
"Jealous?"
"I don't know. It's confusing."
"Isn't it just because you feel guilty to what happened to him?"
"No." She answered almost immediately but suddenly became silent, thinking carefully what to say next, "I don't think that's the case. If that is true, isn't seeing him happy with someone should make me feel relieved?"
"Have you told him about it?"
Sae shook her head. "I couldn't. I don't want him to know. With the way things are now, I can't tell him that. I'm afraid he will just reject me. He still believes that you and I should be together."
It had been days since Fuji woke up and he had been receiving visitors every now and then. Sae constantly visited him but she decided not to show herself to him. Knowing that he was already out of danger was enough for her.
"Ah, Ichinomiya." Sae was about to leave but Tachibana noticed her standing at the slightly open door in one of her visits.
"Um, h-hi." Sae rubbed her nape.
"You must be here to see Fuji. Then," Tachibana stood from her seat, "I should be going now."
"No!" Sae burst out. She was even surprise herself. "I-I mean, you seem to be having a good time. I don't want to interrupt."
"Eh?" The other girl giggled. "You're not interrupting anything. Nii-san is waiting for me so I have to go now." An held her hand and led Sae inside the room. "Fuji-kun, someone's here to see you."
After Tachibana left, the brunette girl became conscious with herself when she realized she was left alone with Fuji.
"I'm glad to see you're alright." Fuji's usual smile was on his face. "Yuuta said you were also here yesterday."
Fuji's tone caused a lonely feeling to spread inside of her. It did not have the same affection it used to have.
"I came here to thank you for saving me," Sae said while her eyes were fixed on Fuji.
"It's nothing. Honestly, my body just moved on its own. The next thing I remember is me waking up here in the hospital."
"D-do you want an apple?" the girl did not wait for a respond and reached for an apple from the side table.
Sae was trying to act as normal as she can but she can feel Syuusuke's eyes on her as she peel the apple on her hand.
"I apologize if I made you worry." Yumiko told him how Sae visited him almost everyday. "The doctors said that I may go home in a day or two."
"That's good to hear. You… can still play tennis right?"
"Yes. The doctor said so. The test results showed that I'm physically fine. Anyway, how are things between you and Tezuka?"
Sae looked up from she was doing but decided to continue before answering.
"We're… good." She handed him the plate of apple but Fuji only stared at it.
"I think I need someone to help me eat that."
"What!?" Sae was sure that he said there was nothing wrong with his arm.
"Say 'aah'." Much to Sae's surprise, Fuji held the apple in front of her mouth.
"Eh? B-but…" She cannot continue for Fuji shoved the apple in her mouth.
The smile Fuji wore at that moment caused Sae's heart to jump. She kept quiet and chewed the food in her mouth, lowering her face so as to hide her flustered face.
"Stop teasing me."
Fuji's hand stopped midway. He placed the fork down on the plate and turned his head to the window.
"You better leave now. Tezuka might misunderstand."
"What are you saying?"
"He already told you his feelings right? You like him, aren't you going out with him now?"
Hearing those words from Fuji, Sae felt like she was stabbed on her chest.
"I do like him but, it's not the same 'like' as what you think. Don't make assumptions about my feelings."
"Oh. Then, is there someone else?"
"I don't need to answer that. Anyway, I could ask you the same."
"Actually, I do."
"You… have?" Sae felt like all her energy drained out of her in that instant. An's face came to her mind. "I-I see. Just tell me if I can help you with anything. It's the least I can do for saving me."
Sae gave her all to not make her fake smile obvious. This must be the punishment for her for not realizing her feelings sooner.
"Now that you ask, there is something I need your help with." She looked at him questioningly.
Sae shivered as Fuji's hand held hers. Her green orbs met his cerulean ones as he locked his gazed at her. She can see her reflection in his eyes as he moved closer to her.
"I didn't think I could feel this strongly for someone." Sae's face burned with his every word. "I don't want to lie to myself anymore. I… love you." Her heart fluttered. His last sentence was spoken in such a low tone that she thought it was just her imagination. She looked away to hide her bright red face from him, but she felt his fingers on her chin preventing her from doing so. His face move closer to hers. He was so close that she could feel his breath on her face. She closed her eyes waiting for what will happen next until… she heard him sigh next to her lips. With his finger on her chin, he moved away from her. When she opened her eyes, she saw Fuji already distanced himself from her wearing an amused smile.
She released the breath she had been holding. His voice, his eyes, and the warmth of his touch, even though it was just practice she cannot help but believe it was all real.
"So, how was it? Will it pass?"
Sae bit her lips. She knew she needed to say something. She promised to help him.
"Y-yeah. I-I think it w-will do." Sae cannot look at Fuji in the eyes. "I-I better go now."
Without looking him in the eyes, she dashed out of the room. She had to, otherwise she might break down in front of him. If his words were meant for her, she must had been leaping for joy but knowing that those were not, it felt like each word was a needle pricking her chest making it painful breathe.
Fuji watched as Sae's figure disappeared through the door. It might have been a bad idea to ask her to be a practice partner and stand as the girl he wanted to confess his feelings with when in reality, it was her all along. But to him, even if only in a make-pretend act, she was able to hear how he really felt for her.
"Seeing her flustered face brings back memories. Those were the days when she knew that she was not just a friend or a junior or a team manager. She is still that sole person who can make my heart beat very fast just by standing close to me. It makes me want to keep her to myself. Seeing her smiling for someone else makes my heart constrict in pain but it is a small price to pay for getting her involved with his plans, or better yet to say, for hurting her. It's funny to think how human emotions make a man so worked-up to the point that he is willing sacrifice everything, even his life, for her."
Sae leaned at the wall outside the room. She reached out to touch her cheek. She did not realize tears started streaming down her face. All the memories she had with Fuji flitted through her mind.
"The reason why I was hurting so bad after our break-up, the reason why the thought of losing him made me very scared, the reason why I felt jealous of An-chan is that… I was in love with him… and I still am— I cannot refute that fact any longer. But the way things between us, I know I cannot tell him my feelings. He will not believe me, worse, he may even push me away, for he believes that it should be Tezuka who should be by my side… but if keeping my feelings to myself would mean that I could stay close to him, I would rather keep it buried in my heart."
What Fuji asked her, hurt her even more. She did not want to hear what he had to say but she decided to listen to him as she promised. She felt so envious whoever that girl was. She felt cold with jealousy. She held her lips shut as she waited for herself to calm down.
"…Echizen played in your place."
"That's good." Fuji looked like he wanted to say something but stopped himself from speaking.
Sae stood by the door, about to enter Fuji's room, but stopped abruptly when she heard faint voices coming from the other side. She did not mean to eavesdrop but she was not able to move from her spot when she heard them mention her name.
"If you're wondering about Sae, she has been busy with practice."
"No. I'm not thinking about her."
"You don't have to lie around me. Why haven't you told her the truth?"
"I have nothing to tell her."
"What about your feelings for her?"
Fuji did not say anything to deny Tezuka's allegation.
"What are you saying? My feelings don't matter anymore. It's you whom she likes."
"Don't you think she has to know how you really feel? It will be unfair for both of you if you keep it to yourself."
"No, it is better that she doesn't know. I love her that's why I decided not to be with her. I hurt her once. If we are to be together, she will always be reminded of that feeling. She is better off with someone else."
Outside the room:
Sae's heart fluttered at what she heard but Fuji's last sentence made her sad.
"Um, Miss, are you alright?" A kind-looking nurse approached Sae.
"Yes, I'm alright. Please, can you give this to the patient inside this room? I remember there is something I have to do."
Sae pushed the basket she was holding to the nurse who approached her and walked away.
"Hn? Aren't you two a bit early today?" Nanako watched as Sae and Ryoma finished their breakfast almost the same time.
It was a good thing that Ryoma maintained a considerable distance between them. It was as if he himself drew the line between the two of them.
"Classes were adjusted to give time for the preparation for the cultural festival." Sae answered after swallowing her rice.
"It's almost time for that huh? So, what is your class going to have?"
"Nothing spectacular but you should go if you want to find out."
A week later
"Fuji-senpai!"
Everyone in the tennis court turn there heads to the pair who just entered. Behind Tezuka was Fuji wearing his usual smile. As the crowd formed around Fuji, questions were thrown to him one after the other.
"When did you get discharged from the hospital?"
"You should have told us."
"How are you feeling?"
"Is it okay for you to play now?"
"Hey now, you're not making any sense with what you are doing to him." Sae's voice stood out, silencing the crowd. She turn her attention to Fuji, "welcome back, senpai."
It was just a normal greeting yet, it felt so distant.
"Hey, are you really alright with this?" Tomoko whispered to Sae as she walked away from Fuji.
"What do you mean?"
"Aren't you being cold towards Fuji-senpai?"
"I don't think so. Does it look that way?"
"Well, it does seem that he has something to say to you."
Sae got a glimpse at Fuji but the latter is busily chatting with the other regulars.
"You're just imagining things, Tomoko."
Cultural Festival
Ryoma's class decided to have a horror house. People just kept coming in and the whole day became very busy, that before they knew it, it was already the bonfire event.
It was the last program of the day and most students look forward to it. It was the time where pairs were supposed to dance around the bonfire and students were taking it as a chance to confess their feelings to the person they like. It was not a surprise to see newly formed couples the day after the cultural festival.
A lone girl watched the remaining event from the window of their classroom. She chose to be left alone rather than look for her friends in the crowd. It was a sight to see how fire lit up the night from afar. Suddenly she heard the door slid open.
"So this is where you've been?"
Sae did not bother to turn around as the familiar voice echoed across the room.
"It's pretty interesting to watch the fire up here."
"Aren't you going to ask him for a dance?"
"I don't think I can do that."
"You're not confident?"
"I'd rather keep my distance from him. I don't want to bother him any further."
"I don't think Captain Tezuka sees you like that."
"What are you talking about Ryoma? You know that the person I like is Fuji-senpai, not Captain Tezuka."
"Fuji… senpai?"
Sae was startled when the voice who answered back to her did not belong to Ryoma but rather to the person they were talking about. Slowly, she turned her head to confirm it. No one else was inside the dark room other than the two of them.
"S-Syuusuke? But I thought I was talking to Ryoma."
Despite the fact the Fuji cannot clearly see her face because the moonlight from the window was the only source of light inside the room, he could feel the shock from the tone of her voice. He was really looking for her but after finding her alone, he thought of playing a little joke by copying Echizen's voice. He did not really think it she would actually fall for it but she did.
The sound of the chair sliding was heard across the room as Sae made a way to the door. Embarrassment was all she can feel throughout her body. Of all the things she could have said, why did he have to hear that from her?
"Hey," Fuji held her arm stopping her from running away. "Is what you said true?"
Sae turned to the person asking the question. She did not know how to respond. Should she deny it or tell the truth?
"Please, just forget what I said just now. Things will be easier that way, right?"
"Then, what you just said is true."
"I'm sorry. I'm not supposed to feel that way towards you, but—"
"Stop. Don't say it anymore." She expected the rejection but she still felt hurt by his reaction. "You heard what I told Tezuka back in the hospital?" Sae nodded. "You have a bad habit of eavesdropping." Fuji sighed defeated.
Flashback
"Don't you think she has to know how you really feel? It will be unfair for both of you if you keep it to yourself."
"No, it is better that she doesn't know. I love her that's why I decided not to be with her. I hurt her once. If we are to be together, she will always be reminded of that feeling. She is better off with someone else."
"You're not sure how about that. She has to decide that on her own."
Knock knock
"Excuse me, but a young lady asks me to give this to you."
The two looked at each other as the nurse placed the basket of fruits on the side table.
"You boys should be careful what you're saying. Whatever it is you two were talking about made that poor girl cry." The nurse said before leaving the room.
End of flashback
Sae simply stared at him.
Fuji held her hand and placed it above his chest.
"Can you feel it? It's beating real fast, isn't it? What I'm about to tell you is true so listen carefully." Fuji heaved a sigh before he continued. "It's true that I decided to go out with you to give Tezuka a push to be true to his own feelings, but my plan backfired. It's true that at first it only piqued my interest as to why Tezuka has his attention to you. Being with you and always having you by my side gave me the answer I wanted. However, the answer I got may be the same reason I have fallen with you too."
Sae could feel smoke coming out from her ear. When he finished, her face was beet-red. "T-then, the practice confession we had… the girl you were supposed to tell those words…"
"I did that since I planned not to tell you my feelings. At the very least, I want you to hear it somehow."
"You—do you know how much I cried when you told me that?!"
"It can't be help. I thought you will go to Tezuka after what happened between us but, I guess I was wrong. Hearing that you choose me over him came to me as a surprise."
*Sniff*
"Hey don't cry." Fuji wiped her tears with his fingers.
"I can't help it. I'm just so happy. I thought that you like An-chan."
"Tachibana-san? I see now. You were jealous. Is that how you realize your feelings for me?"
"Y-you're wrong! I was not jealous!" How can he see right through me?! Sae thought to herself.
"You don't have to be. I only have my eyes set on you. But you better be prepared because I may be the jealous-type." Fuji's attention turned to the door. "Now that she is mine for real, I'm not going to let her go. You hear?" Fuji said in a loud voice as if saying it to someone outside.
Outside the room
"Is he talking to us, nyaa?"
"It seems so." Inui scribbled something in his notes.
"Inui, how can you see what you are writing in the dark?" Oishi tried to take a peek but Inui instantly blocked it from his view.
Tezuka, leaning on the other side of the door adjusted his glasses.
"Are you fine with this Captain?" Ryoma, who was sipping his juice beside him, asked.
"If that is all it takes to see her smile again, I don't object."
"It's so unlike you to say those things."
After several days
"Well then, I didn't think this will be a long-distanced relationship."
"Hmm? What are you saying?"
"You're going to America, right?"
"What of it?"
"I'm not sure how a long-distanced relationship would turn out."
"Long-distanced… relationship? Why do you think of that?"
"You're going to America while I will be staying here. I'm just thinking how to manage that."
"Don't think too much about it. I will only stay there for a week to visit my dad. I do it every year."
Flashback
Cultural festival
"Are you sure you're okay not telling her anything before she leaves?" Fuji heard a voice behind him as he was looking for a certain brown-haired girl. When he turned, Ryoma was looking straight at him. "She is going to America five days from now. Are you not going to do anything?"
"What are you suggesting?"
"She is in our classroom right now. Why don't you check on her?"
End of flashback
"Well, I guess I've fallen to a trap after all."
"A trap?"
"It doesn't matter." Fuji smiled at her, but this time, it was the smile he only showed to her and not the usual smile he kept wearing in front of everyone else. "I love you."
"W-where did that come from?" Sae turned away to hide her face.
"I don't remember you telling it to me yet."
Silence
"I… I l-love you."
"Hmm?" Fuji placed his finger on his chin pondering.
"What?" Sae, flustered, was confused thinking she said something wrong.
"So that's how it felt like when I hear it from you."
"Eh? W-what do you mean?"
"Somehow, it feels strange hearing those words from you. I feel warm and fuzzy inside."
"Stop saying that!"
"Why? Don't you feel that way too?"
"That's not what I meant. It's embarrassing if you put it into words."
"Is that so? But you know, you look really cute when you're flustered."
"Syuusuke!"
"Just kidding. Don't get mad," Fuji moved his face close to her ear, "it makes me want to kiss you right now."
Sae titled her head downward so as to hide her beet-red face. She can never win against Fuji.
"Syuusuke." Sae pulled him close to him and press her lips on his. It was only a light quick kiss but he was surprised by her attack. His cerulean eyes stared at the girl. When she pulled away, a smirk appeared on her lips. "Caught you."
Much to her surprise, Fuji's arm yanked her making her cling to his chest. "W-what are you doing?!" Sae struggled to free herself.
"Do you think I will let you get away with what you did?"
"You two, what's going on here?"
"Y-Yumiko-nee-san!" Sae felt relieved.
"Eh? Sorry, did I disturb something?" a mischievous smile appeared on her lips seeing the position the two are in.
"No. No. You're mistaken Yumiko-nee-san, we are just… um…"
"Well then, I'll leave you two alone." Yumiko winked before closing the door.
Sae did not want to think what Yumiko must be imagining on her mind at that moment. She just continued staring at the door."
"Don't worry. We're not doing anything wrong so it's fine."
"No, I'm thinking of something else."
"Hn? What is it?"
What Sae said to him next sent shivers through his body, while a look of surprise showed to his face.
"Do you want to go with me to America to visit my dad? I want him to meet the wonderful person his daughter chose to be with."
THE END