Disclaimer: Usual I own nothing in relation to Arrow or it's characters.

Chapter 13: Save Me

3 months ago…

"How could I fall in love with him? Are you kidding me? Lust and physical attraction aside he's wonderful, he's beautiful, he's kind, caring, intelligent, funny, empathetic, and oh yeah he feels the same way. Gee wonder why I fell for such a loser." I was being flippant but I didn't care Rose had just indicated that I didn't know Oliver and I frankly felt offended. I had just marched into her office and declared I was done while giving her my new and slightly thicker file. I just didn't care anymore, he said he loved me but because of fear he won't be with me. That teeny little speech might have impacted my overall rational thinking it bit more than I first anticipated.

"Felicity be reasonable you have feelings and shockingly the tin man does as well." My eyebrows raised that. "Rose my god did you just make a joke like an actual joke?" I was shocked and frankly given my mood I needed a good laugh hell even a slight one would do. Her eyes could have melted steel "Watch it goth girl, I too am more than I seem." I smirked and held up my hands in mock defeat. "Fine, fine so now what going send me to jail, watch all your hard work go down in orange jumpsuit flames?" Once again her eyes were terrifying "One question have you slept with him yet?"

My eyebrows more than rose, they were practically to my hairline. I was shocked and all aspects of my face were clearly pointing that out. "Oh for god's sake Felicity did you have sex with him or not?" Finding what little voice I could I muttered "Sadly no."

"Well good than you can still be of some use to us." Once again my joy could be felt via my face "Oh good my lack of a sex life hasn't ruined your evil plans let us all rejoice." Rose I could sense was losing her fragile patience and really who could blame her. "Ignoring that last comment you are a computer genius and you're time in his lair I assume has given you complete access to his files and his plans." I simply nodded as she continued her hands now crossed in front of her and eyes deadly cold. "That means my little blonde firecracker that you can still access him without having to actually see him. Just continue to monitor his status and when the time comes for us to make our move we'll know via your hacking skills." I sat up from my slouched position and put both hands on her glass desk.

"Are you saying that I could have done that this entire time?" Barely making eye contact she whispered "yes." I was fuming now "You made me enter his life, gain his trust, ruin my own heart in the process for nothing then?" Softening her demeanor slightly she attempted to make nice. "Yes and no. You have the access because he got close to you, I should have told you once that was done that all you really had to do was monitor the situation from there. I'm sorry Felicity I really could have prevented your current heartbreak. I just never thought he would love you as much as he seems to." I nodded once again and started to stand. I was tired, angry, hurt and now alone in my misery fighting with Rose wasn't going to change that fact. "I'll continue to monitor his status and report back his day to day moves but Rose… I'm done after that you want him get someone else to bring him in. I just… I can't do that to someone I love even if they don't love me enough to stay… after all no one ever has." With that I left her office and returned home cold, numb and forever alone.

2 months later…

It's been 2 months since I had last laid eyes on Oliver Queen. It had been two months since I had felt his touch, his lips as they crashed into mine. It's been two months since I had felt a damn thing. After my talk with Rose I shut down. I had done this before when my father left, when my mother decided that being a blonde dimwit would be enough to pay the bills, and then finally when Cooper died. All those times paled in comparison to this one. At least during those three events I still spoke, went out, acted like a human being…this time I just stopped caring completely. Yeah ain't love grand. Oliver had attempted to contact me multiple times through either a phone call or a text. The messages were all the same, I'm sorry, please understand, I need you, I miss you. Never once had they said, I was wrong, I'm an idiot or I love you. All those would have broken my-self imposed silence but those words never came. Diggle was another victim of my self-imposed exile. He had stopped by a few times but I never answered the door. He even came to my office but I had ignored his presence only stating Oliver wants me back than he needs to prove it. I wasn't giving an inch.

Kate finally had enough so here she was banging on my door at 3 in the morning screaming at the top of her lungs. "FELICITY, OPEN THE GOD DAMN DOOR, HE'S ONE GUY THERE ARE HUNDREDS JUST PICK ANOTHER. FINE HAVE IT YOUR WAY. NOT THAT YOU CARE BUT HE STOPPED BY MY OFFICE TODAY, GUESS WHAT THAT MAN LOVES YOU… DO YOU HEAR ME HE LOVES YOU SO GO FUCKING TALK TO HIM." The banging stopped and I drifted back to sleep.

The next day had been uneventful I had gone to work, done my job and was leaving. I was polite to people who passed by but my personality tended not to invite the casual conversation. I had pressed the unlock button on my keys and was getting ready to open the door when I glanced into the backseat and to my surprise there was a person… a bleeding person…in a green hood. I hurried up and got in the driver's seat and turned my body to the back seat where Oliver laid bleeding from what appeared to be a potentially fatal gunshot wound. "Oliver you idiot what the hell I won't talk to you so what you figure you'd break the ice by bleeding to death in my car?" My voice was raised but my tone was one of sheer panic. "Felicity… please get me to the foundry." Hearing the strain even those words had caused him I turned back around and started the car backing up and heading straight to Diggle. "By the way my lease so doesn't cover blood stains so you will be paying for the clean up."

It took me five minutes to realize that I wasn't going to able to lift him much less carry him down a flight of stairs. Pushing in the code that still hadn't changed I ran down the stairs in a frenzy to find Diggle with a gun pointed at my head. "Hey ease up cowboy, it's just me." Lowering his gun and with his surprised and slightly shocked voice he responded. "Felicity… wait you're here… oh god what did he do?" Still in quite a panic I said the only thing that came to mind. "He's really heavy and bleeding so yeah I need help." We both ran back up the stairs to retrieve a now unconscious Oliver Queen from the back of my way to small for him backseat.

It took us three hours to stabilize his heart rhythm after he flat-lined once and the machine gave us each heart attack on the second one. Damn loose wires. Despite my anger and confusion over this whole mess I still found myself sitting next to the med table holding his limp, cold hand in my warm and vibrant one. I used my other hand to trace patterns across his exposed chest just savoring the feeling of once again being able to touch him, being able to feel any part of his skin against my own. "He misses you too by the way." Diggle had been watching me with interest for the past hour as I just sat there holding and touching the man who was lying almost dead on the table. I didn't even turn around when I answered. I couldn't bear to remove my gaze from his sleeping innocent face. "I more than miss him Digg, I love him and frankly it hurts to even be near him. However here I am and now that I'm close enough to touch him it's all I want to do."

"I take it he drew a line in the sand the night of the dinner date explosion." I chucked slightly because of course he knew that hell he knew Oliver loved me before I suspect even Oliver did. "Observe that one did you." My tone was snarky but I just didn't have it in me to really care. "Well his exercise regiment increased and I'm sporting more bruises than usual. These last two months have been utter hell for me." That did get me to turn I reluctantly released his hand and turned so that my back was to Oliver and my face was to Digg. "He told me he loved me but that he couldn't be with me. Oh and did I mention he also kissed me before he told me that he wouldn't risk me. This was his fault I never wanted to leave he pushed me away." My tone gave away each emotion with each word spoken. I was mad, angry, sad, haunted, and sadly completely in love with the idiot behind me.

"I know. We've had a lot of time to talk these past two months. Why do you think I've been watching you for the past hour? I just wanted to see how two people who are clearly crazy about each other were dumb enough not to fight for it." I was pissed. "How dare you, I would have been willing to fight if he had just been willing to as well. All he had to do was not walk away, that's it. All he had to do was stay." Diggle moved forward and grabbed me pulling me into his arms. His one hand was on my back while the other cradled my head with brotherly affection. "I have a tip for you, make him fight, oh and tell him the truth." I froze in his embrace what did he mean by tell him the truth? "The truth about what?" Still holding me and swaying back and forth slowly for my ease alone he answered his voice soft and kind without a trace of anger at all. "Tell him about ARGUS and why they want him to help with HIVE. He loves you, he'll forgive you, he won't walk away once he knows."

"How did you find out?" I had pulled away by now and was standing closer to Oliver's body, reaching once again for his now slightly warmer hand. Taking a step back as well and sitting down once again he told me his story and it sadly finally made sense. "Andy Diggle my younger brother was killed by Deadshot. All this you already know, you also were tapped by ARGUS via Rose Danvers to bring Oliver in to defeat HIVE who created Deadshot and got my brother killed. The reason I know all this is because I've met Rose Danvers she and my former wife Lyla Michaels were partners together at ARGUS until Afghanistan. She was even at our wedding so I knew that somehow they had gotten their hooks in you when I saw her leaving your office the other day I showed up to talk some sense into you." I just stood there shocked and unable to speak. He knew and he wasn't aiming a gun at my head, instead he was telling me to tell Oliver because he would forgive me instead of hate me. I was overwhelmed.

"Andy Diggle was you're brother? Lyla was your wife, and Rose was in your wedding. I'm either living in hell or fate truly is the biggest bitch ever." He just nodded and answered my silent thoughts. "I know that you love him, I'm also betting that you told Rose and she brought out a huge file that they threatened to send you to prison with. I'll even go as far as to say that in the past 3 months maybe even longer you've been giving them next to nothing in order to protect Oliver." I just nodded over and over and over again. "He'll never understand, John they staged a car accident, then they gave me a wonderful new life. I swear the moment I started to care for him I tried to stop but then they threatened his safety and life so yeah I was out of options." He came forward again and placed a light hand on my shoulder. "I know they've done the same thing to many others that is the Amanda Waller way." I folded and just slumped forward into his chest. "Are you sure he'll understand?" Chuckling as he patted my back "Yes he loves you that's why he'll understand."

After our conversation we both agreed that when the time was right I'd tell him and the three of us would find a way to fix all that they had done. It was another 3 hours until Oliver woke up. I had sent Digg home hours ago because let's face it I wasn't going to leave Oliver alone in this condition. I had spent my time updating his hardware, checking for any computer issues that might have occurred in the past two months and fixed them. I then ran through my old searches and even added some new ones for better results in the future. I was back by his side once again lightly tracing the contours of his face. I loved his face that much I already knew but his face while asleep was even better. All the worry and guilt he carried was gone, the lines around his eyes lessened. His lips softened and his entire face seemed relaxed and oddly at peace. So here I was lightly using my index finger to trace along his eyebrows, over his eyelids, the contours of his nose and always ending with his lips. I was so wrapped up in my own private exploration of his skin that I didn't even notice when his eyes began to flicker and his hand tightened against my own.

With his eyes fully opening my breath stilled in my chest. This was it the moment where I would either walk away or I would force him to stay. I was still in between deciding and panicking when his eyes met mine. "Hi." His voice was thick and rough causing both a horrible and wonderful chill to spread up my spine. "Hi… you're awake…and I'm touching you… yeah that's not awkward." He slightly laughed before realizing that laughing was still not the best idea. "I know I've been alert for 5 minutes now I was just enjoying feeling your skin against my own. I missed you, feeling you, being near you, seeing you…" Smiling I took the hand that had been tracing his face and moved my finger down along his throat as I slowly traced my way down his collarbone and over the Bravata tattoo above his heart. Feeling slightly more brazen and let's face it eager I leaned forward and this time my finger was replaced by my tongue. I traced my tongue over his tattoo, around the pectoral muscle and then over to the other repeating the same pattern as I moved towards the right collarbone and up. Once I reached the underside of his chin my tongue was replaced by my lips as I kissed and nipped my way back down his neck taking time to slowly suck and nip at his pulse point as he so often had done to mine. Feeling fairly certain that I had left my mark I continued to move down until my mouth was over his right nipple. During this little journey I had felt his hands move to snake in my hair the pressure from his hands getting stronger as moans of pleasure escaped his mouth. "Felicity…. Felicity…" He just kept moaning my name over and over again.

Not sensing any apprehension and taking care to avoid the area with the bullet wound I slowly started to kiss my way around the tender skin, kissing and stroking my tongue against his nipple eliciting a low and lust filled growl from my willing victim. Wanting to hear him growl again I lightly sucked and then bit down on the nipple causing his fingers to clench my hair, and his throat to growl out my name. My body was beginning to respond to this little game of ours, the tingle starting at the base of my spine was getting stronger as was the slickness of my very wanton folds. I stopped suddenly realizing that if I went much further his hands were going to bring me to the edge of my own personal cliff before shoving me right of the edge. I wanted him but not with so much baggage between us. Oliver apparently had other plans.

"Oliver what are you doing, you've just been shot for frack sakes and frankly I should have showed more restraint." Oliver was sitting up now with his legs dangling over the med table eying me with an almost primal urge. "Oliver no, I went too far you flat-lined we are not having sex or doing anything else until we've had a proper conversation." He just smiled as he used his good arm to pull me closer and closer with each word that passed from my lips. "Felicity are you really telling me that you're not aroused right now…" He started slowly kissing the side of my neck sucking and biting as he went, no pausing, no stopping just sucking and biting. "Are you really telling me that you don't need a release…" I did of course I did, I've been needing that release since my first daydream in my office. His good hand was now moving and pushing slightly down my abdomen toward my pelvis. "Come here…" Confused I was about to say what but before I could he had hopped off the table and placed me in the vacated space. "Felicity are you telling me that you don't want me in any form that you can get me…"I was done forgetting all my previous issues I wrapped my arms around his waist and pulled him forward, seeking out his lips I sucked his bottom lip before sliding my tongue between the two. Getting the hint his mouth returned the favor devouring me like I was his last meal; but still keeping some of his intensity locked away.

"Spread you legs baby,.. no further… yes right there" I had been wearing a dress that day and suddenly I had never been so grateful. Remaining mindful of his injury I kept my arms at his waist as he used his still impressive strength to pull my ass to the edge of the table while getting me to wrap my legs around his ass. Bracing his bad arm by placing his hand against the table he then used the other hand to slowly stroke my now slick folds back and forth, his hands making me quiver with each stroke against the fabric. Our mouths continued their own duel as my body now fully clung to his, using all my strength to substitute for his damaged body I slowly moved my lower body back and forth against his very industrious hand.

"Ahh… Oh yes.. ahh Oliver right there… come on baby… keep going" I kept moaning against his mouth as his hand slipped underneath the now drenched fabric. He used his thumb to stoke against my clit eliciting a very loud and very deep scream "OLLIVER… ahh… oh god… yes right there." His thumb kept up the torturous pace against my clit messaging it until I felt my legs beginning to shake my moans were getting louder and so was the bulge in his very revealing leather pants. I kept pushing back and forth against his hand as he continued to stroke and torture the inflamed and engorged skin. I was close I could feel it, the burning sensation was beginning to make my blood sing, his mouth was now at my neck sucking and biting as my mouth continued to loudly moan craving the organism I was minutes away from. Finally I felt him dip his index finger and then his middle finger into my very wet core. With his thumb still pushing away against my now very tender clit his fingers began to move and message me from the inside out. Pumping them in and out caused my body to move faster and faster as I met each thrust with my own until I finally felt my impending release. I started moving even faster with each one in perfect harmony "ahhhh… faster…harder…ahhhh" Until finally my body came shattering around his very talented fingers. "With one last thrust I arched once again into his hand causing him to sputter and shake.

"Oliver…Oliver….Oliver…. I love you… god I love you…" I kept repeating those words over and over again as my body came down from its multiple organisms. I was still clutching my legs against his ass when I looked down to see that not only had I gotten off apparently so had he. I would never look at his leathers in quite the same way again. "Wow, that's all I can say wow. I would have talked to you sooner if you were going to talk to me like that." Leaning his head against my shoulder attempting to catch his own breath he laughed. Kissing my shoulder he lifted his forehead to mine. "Baby if I knew how intoxicating those sounds of yours were I would have broken the fucking door."

We had separated and both of us had "cleaned up" when I felt his hands wrap around my waist. Kissing the top of my ear and nuzzling me softly "I assume I've been forgiven now? If not I'd be more than happy to do a repeat performance." I smiled and interlocked our hands together at my waist before tilting my head allowing for him to lean in closer to my shoulder. "Yes you've been forgiven. We still have to talk however and it's not just about this it's about a lot of other issues as well." He nodded against my head "Fine I'll do whatever you want I just don't want to be away from you anymore." Smiling I forced myself to ask the one question that if I didn't I never would. "Oliver…" His response was a slight "Hmm" "Well when we were…you know…" He just smirked "When I had my fingers inside you yes what." Damn smug bastard "Yes when your rather talented fingers were making me come…cue eyebrow raise… I was rather shall we say vocal in my enjoyment. You were rather silent I was wondering why." His response was great. "I was taking pleasure in yours. I was just as aroused if not more so with every little sound that escaped from that beautiful mouth. Don't worry the next time we come together and next time we will come together the full force of my arousal will leave you unable to speak much less walk for days." I gulped and nodded "Ok, yeah that works for me." He was pushing towards the foundry exit and to my car so we could go home and have our little talk when he once again paused to say one last thing… "Felicity… I love you too."