When Mikey showed up in the lair with two humans, Raphael was pretty sure Leo was going to freak. He was also pretty sure it would be great dinnertime entertainment.
Instead, Raph sat silently and watched as Leo made polite conversation with both Woody and Sadie. He wouldn't say that Leo sat joking with them but he noticed that Leo did seem oddly comfortable with them. Mikey and Donnie followed Leo's lead and happily joined in the conversation as well. By the end of the meal Leo had even suggested that the two humans come back to visit whenever they wanted.
They seemed to take him up on it too. Raph watched Sadie gravitate towards Donnie and his lab as Woody became a fixture in their living room, usually helping Mikey hog the TV.
Raphael dug through the fridge and began to pull out some left-over take-out boxes. They were on their own for dinner that night since Mikey had gone out, with Leo's encouragement, to spend time with Woody. Casey was out having a dinner date with April after he had called her and, again at Leo's encouragement, apologized for acting like a jerk. And he was pretty sure that he'd seen Sadie head into Don's lab earlier that afternoon.
Raph headed to the couch and was surprised to see Leo sitting there by himself. After dinner Leo usually went up to his room and they didn't see him for the rest of the night. He certainly never saw Leo watch TV. He sat down at the other end of the couch from him and leaned over to hand Leo a take-out box since he was pretty sure Fearless hadn't eaten anything for dinner yet either.
Leo absently took the box he was offered and stared down at leftovers of his favorite kung pao shrimp. He frowned at it and then frowned back up at Raph who was busy scooping chicken and rice into his mouth.
"What?" Raph said, noting the frown. "Its yer favorite."
Leo nodded and turned back to the news. He was trying to pay attention, but he had a hard time concentrating on the TV since his arrival in this world. It seemed wrong to sit and do something as trivial as watch television. He'd been about to head into Donnie's lab to see if he'd made any progress when Raph had joined him on the couch.
Raph glanced at him again. "You told me to stop scowlin at you a couple weeks ago," he said before pausing to take another bite. "You act like yer not used to it. Yer Raphael doesn't scowl at you? You two don't fight all the time?"
Leo shook his head.
"How'd you manage that?" He watched as Leo stared into his take-out box and realized after a few moments that Leo wasn't going to answer his question. "Well, what was the last fight you two even had?"
Leo thought about it and decided sharing wouldn't really give anything away. "I texted him a picture of a pan he keeps leaving on top of the stove and asked him if he was aware that its actually supposed to be stored in the drawer under the stove."
Raph stared at him. Their last big fight was about not putting dishes away correctly? "You've gotta be fuckin kiddin me."
Leo huffed out a small laugh, the first Raph had seen in the almost two months Leo had been with them.
"That's pretty much what his reply text said as well," Leo said and let a small smile cross his face as he listened to Raph's rumbling laugh fill the room.
"What are you doing out here, Raphie?"
Raphael turned so his shell was to Leo as he used the back of his hand to wipe tears from his cheeks.
It had taken Leo almost half an hour to find Raphael after he finally figured out that Raph had left the lair.
"We're not supposed to be out in these tunnels, Raph. We're going to get in trouble."
"Then go back," Raph said, keeping his shell to his big brother. "No one asked you to come out here."
Leo frowned as he heard the strange tilt in Raph's voice. "Are you crying? Are you hurt?" He moved quickly and kneeled in front of where Raph sat to get a good look at him.
"No!" Raph said, as he tried to push Leo away.
"Then what's wrong?"
Raph shook his head and looked away, unable to meet Leo's blue eyes.
Leo narrowed his eyes and then cupped his hands on either side of his little brother's emerald face to force Raph to look at him. He raised an eye ridge in silent question.
Raph huffed out a breath in response but reached beside him and picked something up to hand to Leo.
Leo released Raph's face and looked down to take what was offered. "Is that my book?"
Raph nodded.
"What happened to it?" He turned it over in his hands. It was sticky and looked like most of the pages were now missing.
"I spilled juice," Raph said.
"And then?" Leo asked, trying to hide a smile.
"I tried to dry the pages but they started coming out and tearing into pieces. I destroyed it."
"Raphie," Leo said, putting the book down so he could cup Raph's face again. "I don't care about that book."
"Its yer favorite. You read it all the time."
"Only because it's my only book. I don't even like it that much."
Raph rolled his eyes at Leo's smile.
"I'd much rather have you home safe than out here worrying about some book," Leo said, sliding his hands down to shake Raph's shoulders. "Let's go back before father comes home and sees that we're gone. OK?"
Raph's eyes darted back down to Leo's ruined book next to them.
Leo tightened his hold on Raph's shoulders and leaned forward to kiss him quickly on the lips. He smiled when Raph's green eyes shifted away from the book and back to him. "OK?"
Raph felt something squirm in his stomach as he smiled back at Leo and nodded.
Raphael opened his eyes from the dream and stared at the ceiling. Ever since this other Leo had appeared, he'd had several dreams that included memories of him with his own Leo when they were kids. He sat up in his hammock and walked over to his bookshelf. While Leo's bookshelf was stocked with actual books, Raph's bookshelf stored mostly weapons and a few small hand-held weights. But he moved some of the clutter aside and pulled out a motorcycle magazine. He flipped it open and pulled out the two pages that he'd managed to save from that book he'd accidentally destroyed so many years ago. He'd tried to keep the whole book, but the juice had caused most of the pages to eventually mold. Leo probably didn't even know that he'd kept any part of it. But he had. Because it reminded him of that kiss from Leo.
He left his room and went next door. Leo left his door open when he slept. Raph wasn't sure why. Probably so he could always hear what was going on in the rest of the lair. But the open door allowed him to peek in and stare at this other version of his big brother.
This wasn't his Leo. It was the same face. And the same goddamn scent. He was damn close to his Leo. Close enough that Raph was beginning to feel frustrated with longing for his own Leo when he looked at him. How could he miss Leo this much while looking right at his face? He leaned on the door frame and watched Leo sleep. This may not be his Leo but being able to look in on him gave him a sense of peace he'd not felt in a long time.
Leo sensed someone nearby and was surprised to find Raphael standing inside the doorway. He sat up and moved his shell back to the headboard as he rubbed at his eyes.
"What's wrong?" he asked, his voice groggy with sleep. Raph didn't answer and Leo raised his eyes to him again. "Raph?"
Raph took a few steps into the room and sat at the end of Leo's bed. "What's yer relationship with yer Raph like?"
"Our relationship?"
Raph nodded. "Yeah. So far you've said that you don't lecture him and that you don't really fight. That's not what it was like between us when he left." He looked up at Leo. "You've got that symbol on yer arm. Is that for him?"
Leo paused. He hadn't wanted to tell this Raphael the true nature of his and Raph's relationship. It seemed like it would complicate things here even more. But he couldn't lie to Raphael. No matter what dimension Raphael he was talking to.
"Yes, it's his mark," he said slowly.
Raph nodded at the knowledge. He'd already known it. But there was something important in hearing Leo say it.
He took a deep breath. "Can I ask you somethin then?"
Leo nodded through a yawn.
"Before you two got together," he paused. "If you'd just lost yer father, and I told ya I hated you, would ya have left?"
Leo tilted his head as his eyes widened. "You told him you hated him?" He could see the guilt all over Raph's face.
"Would ya have believed me if I said it? Would it have made ya run away?" Raph stared hard at Leo.
Leo looked away. As much as he was adamant that he would never leave his Raphael or his family willingly, he considered this Raph's question. He knew the loss of Master Splinter would've severely affected him, especially at such a young age. And back when he was eighteen, he did sort of think Raph hated him. And if he'd had to hear Raphael say that to him out loud, well, maybe. Maybe he would've run.
Leo looked back to Raph and Raph saw the answer on Leo's face.
"It was still his choice to leave," Leo said when he saw the sad look on Raph's face. "You didn't tell him to go. And I can almost guarantee that it's hardly the worst thing you've ever said to him."
Raph huffed out a breath.
"It was probably just poor timing," Leo added.
They sat in silence for a few moments as Raph thought about Leo's words.
"Have you actually looked for him?"
"You think I haven't looked for my Leo?" Raph growled at him.
"You think he doesn't know how to stay hidden?" Leo stated plainly, raising an unimpressed eye ridge at Raph's snarl.
Raphael rolled his eyes at this other Leo, but then asked, "Well, where would you go?"
Leo had thought about this. He figured one of them would eventually ask him to try to get some clue as to where their Leo had gone. He'd never thought about leaving his family. He had no idea where this Leo would've gone.
"If you haven't seen him in two years, I'd say he's definitely not in the city. And if I didn't have my Raph," Leo said. "I'd probably head somewhere warm."
Raph huffed out a small laugh, thinking about how cold Leo always seemed to be.
"If Donnie could make something to find me in another dimension, couldn't he do something to find me here?"
"I didn't even know he was makin that machine in the first place," Raph said. "I didn't know he could do anything like that. But I hadn't really been home much lately either."
"You know Don brought me here because he was worried about losing you and Mikey."
Raph nodded. He hadn't been a very good brother in a long time.
Leo could see the guilt on Raph's face again. He was about to say something to squash it when Raph spoke.
"Can I ask you something else?"
Leo nodded.
"How did you two actually end up together?"
Leo thought back. "It was your nineteenth birthday."
Raph raised an eye ridge. "Were you my birthday present?"
Leo shook his head and huffed out a small laugh despite himself, thinking of all the presents they had shared on their birthdays over the years since then. "He heard me having a nightmare. And he came in my room to wake me up." Leo paused at the sudden pain in his chest. He missed his Raph.
"And?" Raph asked when he could see that Leo's mind had wandered.
Leo sighed and shifted his eyes back to Raph's face. "And he dropped the scowl. Kissed me. Apologized."
"You forgave him?"
"Immediately," Leo said.
Raphael thought about it. He didn't think a reconciliation with his own Leo would be that easy.
Leo watched Raph think. "It would be that easy." Leo said and watched Raph lift his head in Leo's direction as Leo had so easily voiced his unspoken thoughts. "I miss my Raph. Trust me, he misses you. Raph's always found me. You have to find him."
Raph nodded again as he stood. "Thanks, Leo."
Leo pushed himself back down in the bed and turned his shell to the door. "Night, Raph."