A/N: Thanks to everyone who's followed/favorited and/or is reading but not reviewing:)
dmcreif-Those people genuinely don't understand why Anna cares so much about Elsa, so...:/ I like to think Elsa's not stupid; she does think about things carefully, just not always the most helpful thing for herself.:P
Fatten Saad-I figured Elsa would like having fun with her powers in a hundred percent non-dangerous situation. (I mean, look at her when she's building her ice palace:)) My logic with that is that Olaf can't feel pain because he kind of represents the happy, childish, and innocent side of Elsa; and since Elsa made Marshmallow when she was completely terrified and most definitely hurting a lot inside, Marshmallow can feel pain. I guess it's sort of complicated, but...yeah.:)
johnpatgillespie-Thank you for not being offended:) And I'm glad you liked the chapter!:)
bananas-rule-2015-I'm glad you enjoyed it!:) Yeah, there's more accomplices, because I don't know what idiot would plot against the throne of a country with four people total, lol:P Anyway...:) P.S. Totally fine:)
BellaCullen931-Yes, Elsa WILL need those things. She kind of needs them anyway-she's the monarch of a country; I think she should know how to defend herself, especially when she has built-in defenses.:)
Protoestrella1-Yep, Elsa just predicted a hurricane...very precisely.;) Yay, my description of what Elsa was doing with her ice was good! Yeah, at least they know who the other two are.:) Elsa needs hugs, so...she gets hugs.:) And thanks:)
On to the story!:)
That night, Elsa sat on the floor in her room with Anna looking over the pile of papers they had gotten from the library incident. "They're abdication documents," Elsa said in disgust. "Or technically abjuration ones, if you read this c-carefully, since it s-says 'abjure the realm'." So that's what they wanted out of me, force me to sign these things or else they would hurt Anna. Except then they would probably hurt Anna anyway, even if I did do that.
"These ones aren't," Anna announced. "Read this! And what on earth is 'abjuration'? I've never heard of that."
Elsa took the papers Anna handed her. "It means 'swear an oath to l-leave a country or realm f-forever'," she quoted the official definition. "Basically it would mean I was v-voluntarily exiled from Arendelle. Permanently." Okay, Elsa, don't break down. You knew you would probably find something like that in these papers. It doesn't matter. That isn't going to happen.
"As you should be," a voice said.
Elsa jumped to her feet on instinct. "Who said th-that?" she asked, her shaky voice betraying her inner feelings. "Who is in my r-room?" Elsa's frightened blue eyes darted back and forth, trying to locate where that voice had come from. We didn't catch all of the usurpers earlier. One of them is in here!
Elsa yelped in surprise when the same man that had pinned her against the wall and held a knife to her throat on two separate occasions dropped into her room through the open window. "Get out of here!" she ordered. "This is my r-room!" She glanced down at herself, wishing she was wearing her ice-dress instead of her light blue nightgown that looked almost exactly like the one she'd had at age eight. I probably look like a scared little girl. And most definitely not threatening or like I'm going to take charge of this situation.
"You're stuttering," the man announced.
"What's it to you?" Elsa shot back. She stepped into a protective stance in front of her sister, determined that that man was not going to touch Anna. Anna's revolver is right on my nightstand. Please don't notice it. Please…
"You probably have PTSD or something."
Elsa's mind raced. Where did I hear that line before? I have no idea if I have some stress disorder or not, but that man just told me something important. What is it? Wait a second… "You work for Hans," Elsa blurted; then immediately wished she hadn't when the man started toward her. Elsa started backing away towards the wall.
"No, Elsa! Do what you practiced earlier!" Anna shouted, clutching that pile of papers against her chest. She and Elsa needed to keep those papers. "Elsaaa…don't freeze up. Don't!" Anna began edging toward the nightstand to pick up that revolver.
"You do realize telling that to someone like her is pointless," the man said to Anna. "She's nothing but a terrified little freak. Why did your parents even keep her? Look at her. She's so scared she's shaking. She looks like she's never seen a day of sunlight in her life. And-"
"You shut up about my sister," Anna growled. "Stop picking on her!" He's just saying mean things to Elsa on purpose to hurt her. I promised Elsa I wouldn't get out of control angry again. I promised Elsa I wouldn't get out of control angry again. "Elsa, do what you practiced earlier! I know you can do it!"
Elsa flinched under all the accusations, but Anna's belief in her that she could actually do something fueled her to finally take action. Plus, now she was angry. Elsa's hand shot out and shoved that man against the wall, not nearly as roughly as he had done to her before, but the same motion nonetheless. After all, that man probably weighed more than twice as much as she did. "You hurt me, but you get out of my castle!" she said firmly.
Anna shoved the papers under her sister's bed and smirked. That wasn't what she was assuming Elsa would do, but whatever. Then Anna made a face. Except…I know Elsa isn't physically that strong. She needs to use her powers! That man could just toss her away from him if he wanted to. I can pick Elsa up fairly easily and I don't weigh any more than she does…
Sure enough, a second later Elsa yelped in pain as she was tossed onto the floor. I shouldn't have done that. What in the world was I thinking?! Elsa thought she might have cut her arm on something sharp on the floor or maybe the edge of the bed frame or something, but she ignored it and jumped to her feet. I can't mess with that now. Elsa, do something! Get him out of here!
"Elsa, use your powers!" Anna ordered. "It's all right. Just do it. Do what you practiced earlier!"
Elsa glanced from her sister's reassuring face to the man smirking at her assuming she was too scared to do anything else and back to Anna again. Elsa, do something. Anything! Don't freeze up. Don't freeze up. Anna gave her a slight nod, telling her to go ahead and do something, that yes, it was all right to do so. Elsa scrunched her eyes shut and held her hand out at the man. Ice shot toward the man, hitting him in the arm.
The man clutched his arm and scrambled out the window, surprised that Elsa had actually done something. He hadn't been prepared for that reaction.
"Anna, I…I hurt s-someone!" Elsa whispered frantically. "I know I did…my aim was r-right on…I…I…" But you got the man away from you and Anna. You did the right thing, Elsa. She suddenly dashed over to the window, but it was dark outside and she couldn't see anything. "I should have frozen his feet t-to the floor! That wouldn't have h-hurt him, and we'd have been able to c-capture him. I'm so stupid…"
"But you did actually do something this time, Elsa," Anna pointed out. "I told you to 'do what you practiced earlier', and that was the ice shooting, not freezing feet to the floor. So it's kinda my fault." She hugged a still trembling Elsa close. "You did fine. You didn't freeze up again, and you defended yourself and me. So that's good. And in case you're wondering, you just hit the creep in the arm. You didn't kill him or anything anyhow." Anna pulled away from her sister and looked her straight in the face. "Are you hurt anywhere, Elsa? You got tossed on the floor, and I know that had to have hurt…"
Elsa just shrugged. "I guess my left arm might hurt a l-little," she admitted finally. "But I'm okay."
Anna glanced at Elsa's arm, saw the cut, and promptly made a face. "That 'hurts a little'?! Either you're lying or you have a high pain tolerance, you goof. Or probably both. You need to take care of that!" She pulled Elsa into the bathroom and sat her down on the edge of the bathtub. "Stay there, Elsa. I gotta find…hmm…your cabinets are too organized…can't find anything…"
Elsa giggled as she found a washcloth and held it against the hurt spot herself. Anna, if my cabinets are so organized, that should mean it's easy to find things. Not impossible. "Anna, you're hilarious. Quit messing up my c-cabinets! Everything was easy t-to find in there…"
Anna stuck out her tongue at her sister; then just stood stock-still when she heard a knock on the door. "Elsa, stay here. I'll go look," she said.
Elsa peeked out into her room from the bathroom as Anna opened the door, announced "Don't come near my sister!", and then said in her usual friendly voice, "Oh, Gerda, I am so sorry! I was afraid you were another cuckoo-head that was gonna try to hurt Elsa!" Elsa hid a giggle behind her hand. Anna is so funny. She plopped back down on the edge of the bathtub when she saw Anna and Gerda coming back over to the bathroom.
"Elsa, you were spying on me and just sat back down, didn't you?" Anna scolded. "I told you to stay put!"
Elsa's guilty smile told Anna that was exactly what she had done, and Elsa knew it. "I just wanted to see," she said simply.
"Miss Elsa, did you hurt yourself?" Gerda asked.
"She didn't hurt herself; somebody threw her on the floor and she cut her arm on something!" Anna announced. "But Elsa defended herself and me this time," she added proudly.
Elsa dropped her gaze to her lap as Gerda gently took the cloth away from her arm. I'm still embarrassed and a bit upset about what happened…first I was stupid and tried to pin the man against the wall, and then I shot ice at him instead of freezing his feet to the floor. At least I didn't freeze up. That's good, I suppose. Right?
"I'm sorry if I'm hurting you, Miss Elsa," Gerda said. "Goodness, first those bruises and now this. May I ask what exactly is going on now?"
I don't care who knows about everything now. Those creeps are going to attack Anna and me no matter what I do. "There are still three usurpers in the c-castle," Elsa said quietly. "One of them came in m-my room through the window. Stupid me first tried t-to pin him against the wall l-like he did to me the other day, but he just tossed m-me on the floor…Anna managed to get me t-to actually do something useful, but then I shot an i-icicle at him instead of freezing his feet t-to the floor. So he got away. Again." Because of me.
"But you did defend yourself and your sister," Gerda said. "It sounds like you cut your arm before you chased the intruder away. That means you didn't become paralyzed in fear after you were hurt. You did fine, Miss Elsa. And there, does that feel better now?"
Elsa smiled a bit and touched the bandage covering the cut on her arm. "It's okay. Maybe if something happens a-again, I'll actually have a better r-reaction." She hopped up and hugged both Anna and Gerda. "I don't know what I would d-do without both of y-you," she said softly. Gerda has been a mother to me since I was little. And Anna's just…she's just my awesome little sister. She doesn't mind me and all my problems; she just takes care of me and she treats me like a normal sister.
"D'you want me to stay with you tonight?" Anna asked a few minutes later.
Elsa nodded shyly from under the covers. I can't know if Anna is safe or not if she doesn't stay in here with me. And…I don't want to admit it, but I feel safer with Anna, too. "I'm sorry I'm so…so…"
"I think you're perfect just like you are," Anna informed her sister. "Please don't apologize for anything about yourself." She plopped down next to Elsa and took Elsa's hands in hers. "I love you, Elsa. I'll always love you, no matter what. I don't care if you need a friend with you to help you feel better a lot of the time. I like being your friend." Anna paused for a moment; then added, "I bet you could make it through the night without your gloves now, Elsa."
Elsa's cheeks turned red as she jerked her hands away from her sister and hid them under the covers. I can't do that. I'll just lose control again…I do hate wearing gloves though, even if it's just while I'm sleeping… "I want to take them off…I just d-don't trust myself," she said finally. "What if I mess up and l-lose control again…?"
Anna gave Elsa's shoulder a gentle squeeze. "I don't think you would, but I'll leave you alone about it for now. I know you'll take 'em off when you're ready," she told her sister. I gotta let Elsa do things at her own pace. She's way, way happier and more confident than she was before, but she still needs to let herself finish healing inside.
"Thank you for the vote of confidence," Elsa said happily. She turned over and curled up on her side with her eyes closed. Anna is right. I will take them off when I'm ready.
"You deserve it," Anna replied firmly. She hesitantly touched the bandage on her sister's arm as she asked, "Does it still hurt?"
Elsa blinked sleepily at Anna. "It just stings a bit…no big deal…my fault anyway…Elsa stupid…" she mumbled tiredly. I shouldn't have tried to pin that man against the wall…what was I thinking? I barely clear a hundred pounds and that man had to have been over twice that…I'm just dumb. Really, really dumb.
Anna turned out the light; then flopped down on the bed next to Elsa and tossed one arm around her sister. Elsa is so sleepy I know she's not just pretending to be ok. So that's good. "You aren't stupid. It was the first time I've seen you actually do something yourself. So I'm proud of you. Even if it's silly to try to choke somebody over twice as big as you are, 'specially when you don't know what you're doing," she teased. "Elsa, what on earth possessed you to try that anyway?!" She could have gotten seriously hurt, getting tossed on the floor like that! And Elsa barely weighs anything; she's a string bean besides…
"Dunno…" Elsa replied, sounding sleepy. "Thank 'ou…for holding…me," she added a moment later. I feel safe right now. I know I have a lot of things to take care of tomorrow, but right now I am safe and sound with my sister.
Anna jerked awake a few hours later because the room had become downright freezing. Why is it so crazy cold in here?! Wait a minute…Elsa! Duh. She shivered and lit the kerosene lamp on the nightstand. "Elsa, are you all right?" she asked softly.
Elsa lay curled in a ball with her hands covering her face, her body shaking a bit all over as she tried to keep from crying. "N-no…I…I'm…that is…I can't…I'm…" Elsa shook her head and gave up trying to explain to Anna what was wrong. I can't even tell Anna what's wrong with me right now. I didn't even have a bad dream; I just woke up and completely lost it.
"You don't have to explain. It's all right," Anna said. "I don't know what's making you upset, so I'm just gonna hold you 'til you feel better. 'Kay?" She carefully pulled Elsa onto her lap and just hugged her close. Well, Elsa feels cold, but she's not too cold to touch, so that's good. "You're safe now, Elsa. I won't let anyone hurt you," Anna added quietly.
I'm safe right now. With Anna. I can deal with those problems tomorrow. Elsa hid her face in her sister's shoulder and let herself go limp. I trust Anna not to drop me, she realized. "Thank you," she whispered finally. "You made the terrified l-little freak feel better…and I feel s-sick…"
Anna scowled and held Elsa tighter. "Elsa, you were thinking about those rotten things that man said about you. I just know it. You are not a terrified little freak! And you were shaking just now 'cause you were trying to stop crying, not 'cause you were scared. Besides, even if you were shaking because you were scared, I'd still just give you hugs and comfort you 'til you felt better. I love you, Elsa." Well, at least she didn't get like this when that man came in here. I don't mind Elsa getting upset and all, but I don't want her giving people like that ammunition to use against her, either. "And…I think you'll feel un-sick in a minute. You just gotta be happy again, remember?"
"I do look l-like I haven't seen a day of sunlight in m-my life," Elsa said softly. "It's almost l-literal for me, too…" I have abnormally fair skin anyway, and I was isolated in my room for years on end…that's one thing that horrible man was right on…
"Elsa, you just have really fair skin. You'd probably have your coloring even if you went outside all that time when you were little. I think you're pretty," Anna announced. "You look perfect just like you are. Don't go out in the sun and try to turn brown; you're gonna get sunburned. Really, really easily."
Elsa giggled at that. "Then you can have a Lobster Queen instead of a S-Snow Queen," she quipped, knowing Anna was right. Elsa was positive she would turn bright red if she stayed out in the sun for any length of time. "I'm tired, Anna…" Elsa stifled a yawn and settled herself comfortably in her sister's arms. I'm happy and safe with my little sister…Elsa, you deal with those problems you need to take care of first thing tomorrow. For now, just stay calm and don't wake your sister up again tonight.
Anna resisted the urge to sigh when Elsa stayed half-sitting, half-lying in her sister's arms even though she was happy now. Elsa might not weigh much, but she's still getting heavy! Especially when she's just all limp like that. Although…that means Elsa trusts me not to drop or hurt her. I can't take that trust away from her. She brushed a stray wisp of hair out of Elsa's contented face and just cradled her securely in her arms. "You are such a stinker, Elsa, but I love you for it," Anna said quietly. "I know you don't trust a lot of people, but you trust me enough to fall asleep with me holding you…"
"Most people…not deserve trust…Anna…exception," came Elsa's half-asleep reply.
The next morning found Elsa still in her sister's arms. Anna held me all the rest of the night, Elsa thought in surprise. Anna had half-dropped Elsa after she'd fallen asleep herself, but Elsa didn't care. She felt absolutely, positively safe and loved. Elsa thought most people didn't deserve to be trusted, but her little sister was an exception to that rule. Oh yeah, and Elsa trusted Gerda too. But she didn't trust anyone else implicitly. Elsa had spent so long deprived of any socialization skills that she couldn't trust anyone else. The two people Elsa wished she could have trusted never gave her a chance. She hadn't been around anyone else long enough to decide whether they were trustworthy or not. Better to be cynical and pessimistic than trust people too easily, like what happened when Anna trusted Hans. I can't let anything like that happen again.
Remembering those papers she and Anna hadn't finished looking at the night before, Elsa slid out of her sister's arms and crawled partway under her bed to retrieve those papers. Okay, Elsa, no matter what the papers say, don't freak out. They're just papers. Elsa quickly took off her gloves and left them on the nightstand. Then she froze her door and window shut. I will not be caught unawares by someone breaking in here again. That should prevent that from happening. Elsa set the papers in a neat pile on her desk; then quickly put her ice-dress on and fixed her hair in her now usual single braid. "Elsa, you and Anna captured half of the usurpers," she informed her reflection in the mirror. "So now c-catch the other ones." She made a face at herself, thinking that even in her ice-dress showing her true self, she still just looked like a little girl. I think I look okay in general, but no wonder those people think they can easily take advantage of me. I'm genuinely nothing but a scared, freakish little girl to them.
"Hi, Elsa," Anna mumbled sleepily from the bathroom doorway. "You wake up too early…woke me up…Elsa missing…she's safe, right?"
Elsa promptly gave Anna a hug. "I'm safe. You took care of m-me," she said softly. I'm not going to bother worrying about whether I look like a little girl or not. If I do, I can't help it. It's just me, and oh well. Besides, if they think I'm just a scared little girl, then I have the element of surprise in my favor. That's good. I just can't freeze up again.
"Anna wants ice-dress too," Anna mumbled, still sounding like she was half-asleep.
Elsa gently shook her sister's shoulders. "Anna! You sound like you're s-still half asleep!" she informed Anna. I can't make Anna an ice-dress anyway. She'll freeze.
Anna finally woke up all the way. "I want an ice-dress," she repeated. "Just like yours! I know you said it'd be too cold for me, but I want to see anyways. Please?"
Elsa clasped her hands together, holding them close against her chest. I can't make Anna an ice-dress. What if I mess up and freeze her instead of making a dress? "May we please just l-look at those papers together instead?" she asked hopefully.
"All right," Anna agreed quickly. She had already figured out that Elsa did that hand-clasping thing often when she was nervous or upset. Me having a dress like Elsa's is so not worth making her upset. I'll ask Elsa later. "I'll go get dressed and stuff, and then we can look at the papers together. Ok?"
"Okay." Elsa sighed in relief that Anna had dropped the topic. Thank you, Anna.
"Your deduction last night that those creeps work for Hans was right!" Anna exclaimed a short while later. "Look at this."
Elsa quickly scanned the paper Anna handed her. "Oh my goodness," she muttered a minute later. It's a note/letter that one of those people wrote…he was going to send this to Hans…great. Just great. Did Hans even get punished when he arrived home to the Southern Isles? This leads me to believe that he got scolded and that was about it… She couldn't resist rolling her eyes at that note. "Anna, have you read this?! It's c-completely illogical!" First it says 'This will be simple. The ice girl breaks easily; she'll be helpless without her sister by her side.', and then it says 'The Snow Queen is powerful; she just doesn't show it. We should get paid more for undertaking such a dangerous job.' Suddenly Elsa found the whole thing hilarious in a sick sort of way. "I'm helpless and powerful?!" Elsa unsuccessfully tried to stifle her laughter. Since it was funny at her own expense, she didn't feel bad for laughing.
Anna scowled, but then she realized just why Elsa thought that was so funny and started giggling herself. "So those people are cowards besides! Also, they're admitting that you could easily beat their butts! Elsa, you have so got to find the last three of 'em, and just freeze their feet in place. I can't wait!"
"They're scared of a little g-girl who stutters, has p-panic attacks, and barely knows how to c-control something that's physically part of her!" Elsa was practically rolling on the floor with laughter now. She knew the only reason those men were remotely scared of her was because of her powers, but still. Good grief, they're probably as scared of me as I am of them. That makes me feel a lot more confident. I wonder if something happens again, I could bluff my way out of it. As long as I didn't freeze up…
"Quit picking on yourself, Elsa," Anna said firmly. I shouldn't have said that. For whatever reason, Elsa thinks it's hilarious, and I don't wanna make her upset all over again…
"I'm not-I just stated facts! Look at me, Anna. Do I really l-look threatening?" Elsa hopped to her feet, still giggling, and continued in a faux-threatening manner, "It is I, the indomitable S-Snow Queen! Shall I-" She couldn't keep up the act any longer and just plopped back down on the floor next to Anna, unable to contain her giggles.
Elsa doesn't understand just how much she's capable of. She's laughing at her own expense, but it's not funny anymore. Elsa thinks she isn't even worth enough to be an equal opponent to those people trying to get rid of her. Anna frowned and scooted closer to her sister. "Elsa, you definitely don't look threatening, but you shouldn't underestimate yourself. You make it sound like you're a harmless, annoying little fly that those creeps could just squish in about two seconds."
Elsa's laughter abruptly ceased, and she looked straight at Anna. "That is what I am. Look at me. If I were, say, just w-wearing a normal dress-not my ice-dress-and walking d-down the street outside the castle, and you were s-some creepy attacker up t-to no good, wouldn't you think I'd be an easy t-target? That isn't counting all my other problems, like g-getting those awful panic attack things and s-stuttering." The one defense mechanism I have is one I'm afraid to use…without Anna around, I'd be rendered helpless almost instantly. I just know it. She had to work hard to convince me to use my powers last night…
Anna just bit her lip and gave her sister a hug. Elsa does have a point. Without her powers, she can't really do anything. So…wait a minute! That also means that with her powers, she's really a formidable opponent, all the more so because those people won't be expecting anything out of her. "Elsa, there's one very big problem with your logic. You are not just a slight young girl who's completely oblivious to the bad things going on around her and doesn't have any way out if she's attacked somehow. You know about the creepy people, and you also have a defense system and weapon that can't be taken away from you in a fight. If anything, those creeps are far less equipped to deal with you than the other way around," Anna pointed out. "Also, your stuttering has absolutely nothing to do with your fighting capabilities. You talk quite a bit better now, and even if you didn't, it's not a valid negative anyhow."
Elsa shuddered a bit and hid her face in Anna's shoulder. "I don't want t-to have a built-in weapon," she said softly. "That means I'm dangerous…" And those people are quite well-equipped to deal with me. All they have to do is attack me verbally and I'm down for the count. Stupid me.
Anna roughly jerked herself away from her sister and put her hands on Elsa's shoulders. "No, Elsa. You do too want a built-in weapon. That means nobody can disarm you. Period. You're right, that does mean you're dangerous. But only to someone who's attacking you or me or whoever else you'd want to protect. Understand?"
Elsa dropped her gaze to the floor and didn't respond. That does make sense…it's just…what if I mess up? And I really don't want to hurt anyone, even someone who's after me. I'd just want to get them away from me and that's it. She jumped and looked back at her sister when Anna shook her again. "I…I sort of understand," Elsa said finally.
"Maybe this will help you understand. You aren't dangerous to me one bit," Anna replied, now sounding more like her usual happy-go-lucky, I-love-Elsa-and-want-to-comfort-her-and-make-her-happy self. She pulled Elsa close and just hugged her tightly. "Are you ready to go downstairs for breakfast? We can find those two drips, too. You don't have to hurt 'em. You can just freeze their feet to the floor."
"Okay. Just…please don't…leave me to handle it on m-my own," Elsa said softly, not wanting to admit that she needed help but knowing quite well that she did. If those people separate Anna and me somehow…we're doomed. That's one thing that note was dead right on. I will be helpless without Anna right by my side…
"Of course not!" Anna exclaimed. "You are capable of handling things like that by yourself, but I won't leave you alone. I promise."
A/N: So...Elsa's a bit more likely to actually do something now.:)
Next chapter coming soon!:)
P.S. Please excuse the blah chapter title...I stink at coming up with chapter titles in my opinion.:P