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Eragon sat there with Murtagh and Orik, eating ice cream next to the burning van which used to contain frozen dairy treats. From the back of the vehicle came the ice cream man, his whole body ablaze.
Ice cream man: HEEEEEEEEEEELLLLLLLPPPPP MMMMEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Eragon: You got my fudgesicle?
Ice cream man: Oh yeah here you go (hands Eragon a fudgesicle) that'll be 1.50$ sir
Eragon: Here you go.
Murtagh: Hey! Where's my Mega Missile Warhead?
Ice cream man: were ran out of that a while ago, how about a Firecracker?
Murtagh: uuuuuuuuuuuuuuuhhhhhhhhhhhhhh .....................okay (takes the Popsicle and gives him the money).
Ice cream man: What was I talking about again? (Scratches burning head) Oh well, I guess if I ignore it it'll go away. We'll see you later.
The ice cream man goes into the flaming truck without noticing that it's on fire. As soon as he starts it up, the van explodes causing him to fly out and hit the ground.
Ice cream man: urrggh...............hey, I'm alive! IM STILL ALIV-(gets knocked out by baboons)
Baboon #1: Take him to the torture chamber!!!!
Baboon #2, #3, #4 and #5: Yes sir!!!!! (Drags the ice cream man away)
Baboon #1: (points at Eragon and the gang) you saw nothing.
Eragon: .......
Orik: .......
Murtagh: .......
Baboon #1: Oh and by the way, could you give this pie to Durza? He forgot it while trying to escape. (Hands the pie to Eragon) See you later!
They waited for the baboons to leave before finishing their popsicles and started thinking of ideas for their movie.
Eragon: We should have dragons in the movie, and lots of them!
Orik: How can we do that? The only dragons at our disposal are Saphira and Thorn.
Eragon: Easy, since Saphira is a female and thorn is a male they could just-
Murtagh: HELL NOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Eragon: Relax, all we need is about 100 eggs, your dragon will have to stay up all night for the next week and I'll have to buy at least 10 barrels of Red bull and-
Murtagh: I SAID NOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!
Eragon: Okay fine, just 50 eggs then
Murtagh: HOW MANY TIMES DO I HAVE TO SAY IT, NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!
Eragon: Can I at least get some of thorn's butter?
Murtagh: What did you just say?
Eragon: What? I'm hungry and my toast is getting cold.
Murtagh: For a second there I though you wanted me to get you thorn's sperm
Eragon: Ewwwwww....that's disgusting, I would wait until you left for somewhere like Ellesméra and take as much as I can from Thorn before you come back
Murtagh: Wait what?
Eragon: Ok we'll have more ideas in larger groups so Orik, you go to Surda and bring as much people as you can. Oh yeah and by the way, give this pie to Durza on your way
Orik: You can count on me
Eragon: Now Murtagh, go to Ellesméra deep within Weldenvarden and convince them to be in my movie. I'll go and bring Saphira and Thorn.
Murtagh: HEY! I know what you're trying to do! As soon as I leave, you'll go and try to get some of Thorn's-
Eragon: Did I mention that since the elves are vegetarians they don't hunt the animals in the forest
Murtagh: I'm still not going
Eragon: Did I also forget to mention that one of the animals are made of magical taco?
Murtagh: I'll go get my hunting equipment and my lucky harpoon!!!!!!
Eragon: Then it's settled, well meet up here when were done
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Orik finally arrived at the police station were Durza was imprisoned until his debt was repaid.
Durza: Orik thank god! You got to get me out of here! The baboons are coming to bring me back to the torture chamber!
Orik: Eragon said to give this to you
Durza: MY PIE!!!! FINALLY!!!!
Orik: Well, see you later. (Walks away)
Durza: WAIT!!!!!!!! Well at least I have this pie made of...........wait a second, what's this? (Finds paper under pie tin)- DESINTEGRATOR PIE; IT MELTS ANYTHING- Oh great! What am I supposed to do with a pie that can melt anything ... Wait a second I got an Idea!
He aims the pie towards the jail bars and, without a second thought, hits the cop on the face. The man then instantly turns into liquid. Durza then takes the keys from his remains and opens the door.
Durza: Now all I have to do is go get enough money to pay of my fine and I can get out of this horrible place. Its times like this I'd like to thank my brain for making me so smart.
Durza's brain: What the hell are you talking about? Your freaking dumb!!
Durza: No I'm not!
Durza's brain: Yes you are!
Durza: No I'm not!
Durza's brain: Yes you are!
Durza: No I'm not!
Durza's brain: Yes you are!
Durza: No I'm not!
Durza's brain: Yes you are!
Durza: Prove it!
Durza's brain: How about this idea right now!
Durza: What of it?
Durza's brain: Why don't you just walk away? You're already out of jail
Durza: well that would be breaking the law
Durza's brain: Just go meet everyone in there movie thing
Durza: Fine, but we go to the pie shop first
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Deep within Weldenvarden, all the animals cowered in fear as the monster struck down yet another one of their companions.
Murtagh: Let's hope you're the animal made of tacos
Elf: STOP!!! IM NOT EVEN AN ANIMAL!!!!!!!
Murtagh: (sniffing the elf like a dog) you're right and you don't even smell like taco. Oh well, to the evil hole of torture you go!
Murtagh drops the elf in the hole, causing him to hit his head on the ground below. He looks around and sees paralyzed and scared beasts near an open TV.
TV announcer: The following presentation is brought to you by: THE MAGICAL BABOONS OF THE GAY BAR!!
Elmo: Help me count! 1, 2, 3, 4...
Elf: NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO- you got anything to drink?
Murtagh: no
Elf: NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!
Murtagh: Ha-ha! Look at him suffer!
Giant deer made of tacos: Hello! I am the giant deer made of tac-
Murtagh: SHUT UP OR GO AWAY!!!!!! I'm busy making someone suffer!
Giant deer made of tacos: Fine! (Walks away)
Murtagh: Hahahahahahahahaha now I'm bored.....well time to go hunting. I WILL FIND YOU TACO BEAST WEREVER YOU ARE!!!!!
Giant deer made of tacos: I'm right here
Murtagh: SHUT UP!!! Can't you see I'm trying to catch you!!!
Giant deer made of tacos: ......
Murtagh: Now where was I...... ah yes I WILL FIND YOU!!!!!!
Will the ice cream man ever escape the clutche of the baboons? Will Durza ever stop arguing with himself? Will Murtagh ever find the taco animal? Is Eragon really gonna milk Thorn? Will I ever stop questioning myself? tune in to find out!!
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