Chapter 11

TOBIAS

"Christina?! What are you doing here?" I asked, surprised.

"I hear you went to see Matthew today," she said, ignoring my question and inviting herself into my apartment.

"Yeah I did. Wanted to chat with him and see how he was going," I replied. She knew I had planned to go see him so I wasn't sure where she was going with this.

"And is it true about his memory serum?" she asked, fishing for something.

"Is what true?" I asked, deferring her question with a question.

"That they can manipulate memories. Take away memories and input what they want you to believe? Kind of like what Tris did at the Bureau in wiping their memories, but this takes it one step further, to be able to implant memories they want so the recipient actually believes it to be genuinely true. Rather than us having to convince them of a circumstance," Christina answered and I didn't like the idea that that was possible.

If that was true, it could have very wide reaching repercussions. The thought of this getting into the wrong hands was sickening. I shuddered to think at what someone like Jeanine could have done with the technology. Matthew hadn't mentioned it. Was it possible? Matthew wasn't working on something like this. Surely?!

"No, it's not true. Matthew is working on assisting the recovery of memories, not the alteration of. The serum is a passive stimulant of the hippocampus and surrounding areas which enable the person to push past the trauma or void that is making them forget. It is not an aggressive serum like Jeanine's were. This works to revive memories, not replace them," I said, finding myself defending Matthew and his research.

"Are you sure?" she asked me, crossing her arms over her chest. I hoped I was wrong about the feeling I was getting about Christina in that she was believing the rubbish that the Revolutionists were putting out.

"Of course I am sure. If you're concerned, why don't you go and see Matthew so he can fill you in on his projects. He's quite excited about them," I answered.

"That won't be necessary. I'm glad," she replied but didn't sound very happy about it.

"How was your day?" I asked, changing the subject. We were friends. It all seemed to have changed within a couple of days, but it was about time I got this back on track.

"It was good. I've been able to get out and about a bit more lately with work so I am enjoying the change," she answered and we went and sat on the lounge.

"That's good. Sounds like it's becoming more varied. What are you getting out and about doing?" I asked, curious.

"Just interviews and visiting clients," she answered vaguely. I didn't push. We both seemed to be suspicious of each other.

"Sounds interesting. Been out ziplining lately?" I asked, surprised at the fact I was struggling to make conversation with her.

"Not recent. But a bunch of us will be getting together to go in a week or so. Did you want to come?" she asked politely and I shook my head emphatically.

"No thank you. Once was enough," I said and she grinned at me.

"Once is definitely not enough!" she said and laughed. "I love the rush even still!" This was the Christina I knew. And this was the Christina who helped me make it through the loss of Tris. "So tell me about this girl you're seeing," she said and I cursed inwardly.

"What do you want to know?" I asked, hedging. I had to skirt the truth.

"Do I know her?" she asked.

"I'm not sure," I replied and she narrowed her eyes at me.

"How old is she? Hair colour, eye colour etcetera," she asked.

"She's nineteen," or would be I mentally added, "and has blonde hair and sky blue eyes," I added and noticed my voice started getting a little dreamy. I really missed Tris.

"And you're crazy about her," Christina added smiling. I think she thought I must finally be over Tris.

"Yeah, I am," I answered without hesitation.

"Good. I've been thinking about Will a lot lately," Christina said.

"Oh really?" I asked. I wondered if she knew he was coming back.

"Yeah, about how much he changed me in such a short time. How much he meant to me," she said and her voice faltered slightly. "If not for that damn serum," she said and her voice started taking an angry undertone. I had almost thought we were back to how we were but perhaps her resentment at the way Will had died had resurfaced with a vengeance.

"It's good that you can focus on the positives," I said, ignoring her last comment.

"Yeah," she replied and we sat in silence for a few minutes. "So I was thinking that we should have a bit of a reunion," Christina announced suddenly.

"A reunion?" I asked.

"Yeah like get some of the old boys and girls together and go down to the old grounds and have a capture the flag activity. Minus the guns. Add in a picnic beforehand. Something different and fun," she explained.

"I like that idea. We should start planning it," I said, slightly excited at the prospect. I had actually always enjoyed the games and it was true I missed it just a little bit. And so the next couple of hours went by quickly and Christina seemed like her old self, not the bitter thing she seemed to be lately, full of hate and vengeance. I hoped she wasn't going to turn out like Tori in this way who had been driven entirely by her want of revenge against Jeanine Matthews.

"I should probably go," she said, it was quite late and I was surprised Zeke wasn't here yet.

"Thanks for coming over," I said, walking her to the door. "It's been fun."

"Yeah it has. Hey," she said, turning and placing a hand on my arm, "have you seen that person on the street who you thought was Tris again?" she asked, seemingly concerned.

"No," I replied, which was the truth. I hadn't seen her again on the street.

"Well that's good I guess," she said sighing. It seemed she was as disappointed as I with the answer. Perhaps she still missed Tris a lot as well, which probably added to her current anger when she wasn't nostalgic.

"Yeah I guess," I replied and we shared a look.

"Bye Four, see you later," she said and left. I closed the door and sat back down on the lounge and waited for Zeke to come over. I leaned my head back and closed my eyes. I think I must have nodded off because next thing I knew, Zeke was knocking on my door a couple of hours later.

"Hey Zeke," I said and stood aside to allow him to pass. He didn't say anything as he walked past me. "You ok?" I asked and he looked at me.

"Ness broke up with me," he said in a monotone.

"And how do you feel about that?" I asked him.

"I actually don't know," he replied and we sat down on the lounge. Then he seemed to snap out of his funk as he remembered why he was here. "You ready?" he asked me and I laughed.

"Born ready," I replied and he got it ready.

"Are you going in first again?" he asked and I shrugged. We could use my landscape or his and I could go in first or we could just go together. "I think you should go in first again," he said and I nodded.

"Sure, see you soon," I said as I injected the serum and closed my eyes.

Nothing happened.

I waited for the wind of being atop the Hancock building.

Nothing.

I waited for the walls to come crashing in on me.

Nothing.

I opened my eyes and looked at Zeke, but Zeke wasn't there. I looked around. I was still in my apartment. I stood up and walked into the bedroom. Tris was asleep in my bed again.

"Tris?" I said as I walked over to the bed. She stirred and opened her eyes.

"Hey," she said groggily, grinding sleep from her eyes. I sat on the bed and she smiled up at me. "Come here," she said and pulled me down to her. I slipped under the blanket and cradled her to me. She was so warm as she snuggled into my chest. "I love you," she murmured.

"I know," I said back and wondered where this was going. This didn't seem to be the aware Tris who was waiting for me in the landscape. But this wasn't my fear landscape either. Was it? I hugged her tightly to me and she looked up at me and kissed me. Something changed and she kissed me hard, reaching for my shirt and tugging it up and over my head. I pulled her shirt off and relished the sweet sensation of her skin against mine.

I ran my hands up over her and she shivered and sighed against me. I kissed her neck and down her shoulder. "Tobias," she murmured. I was about to lose control in five… four… three… "Maybe we better slow down," she said and I chuckled. I snuggled back into her and we were so content and warm, that we fell asleep.

Banging. I could hear banging. It was coming from inside my skull. No wait, it was coming from outside. I opened my eyes. I was in bed with Tris and she looked around, startled.

"What's that?" she asked and I shook my head.

"I don't know," I answered and we both got up quietly, looking around. The noise was coming from two sources. One sounded like gunfire coming from the street, and one sounded like someone pounding on the door. Tris looked at me and we shared a look, then we moved silently over to check out the scene outside the window, hopefully without being seen.

There were people running everywhere and a number of randomly dressed people chasing them down with guns. Tris and I both watched in horror as a man dressed all in grey, chased down a woman running with a small child, and killed them in cold blood. Tris gasped and I shuddered. I grabbed her hand. What the hell was going on? Someone was still pounding on the door.

I was about to go and see who it was when the man in grey looked up at us and without a second's hesitation, fired up at us. Before we could even drop to the floor, glass shattered, raining down on us and I felt something warm and wet hit my face. We both dropped to the floor and I looked at Tris and screamed. She'd been shot in the skull. There was blood everywhere.

"Four!" shouted Zeke, shaking me. I screamed again and opened my eyes, blinking rapidly as tears ran down my face. "Tobias, calm down!" Zeke said emphatically. "Whatever you saw, wasn't real!"

"What?" I asked him, gulping in deep breaths. "She's not?" I asked and I couldn't even speak the sentence.

"Four, calm down," he said soothingly this time and I focused on my breathing. In. Out. In. Out. "What happened?" he asked me and I shook my head, brushing the tears from my cheeks. "It was only your fear landscape. It's all ok," Zeke said, rubbing my shoulder.

"Oh my God," I said, still struggling to get a grip on my emotions. It felt so real. It was unlike any other fear landscape I had ever been in. Minutes passed as we sat in silence and I forced myself to pull myself together.

"What happened?" Zeke asked me again, softly this time. Probably hoping it wouldn't turn me into a blubbering wreck again.

"It wasn't like any other fear landscape I have ever been in. I may not be a true Divergent, but I know when I'm in a simulation. This one was so different. Tris was there, and I forgot I was in a sim and we fell asleep. I woke up to some kind of alternate reality where there were people with guns chasing down and murdering people in cold blood. And Tris was shot," I said and my voice faltered. "It felt so real Zeke. I know they normally do, but this was so different!"

"Wow. That sounds very deceiving. This is still the same batch of the serum, so I'm not sure what happened," Zeke said, analysing the why instead of the what. He paused and looked at me. "Do you want to try again?"

"Yes," I said without hesitation. Now I needed to know she was ok.

"Are you sure?" Zeke asked me and I nodded.

"If it happens again, pull me back out," I said and he nodded. I injected the serum and closed my eyes. When I opened them, it was pitch black. I brought my hand up in front of my face and couldn't see it, it was that dark.

"Hello?" I asked and my voice echoed. But I couldn't hear any other sounds. My feet were on solid ground and I walked hesitantly forwards with my hands out on front of me. If I was in a room, hopefully there would be a light switch.

"Tobias, concentrate," said Tris and I looked around in the dark for her. If I was in a simulation, I could do what she had always done, and pictured what I wanted. There WILL be a lightswitch, just in front of me. I reached out and hit a wall. I ran my hands over it and found a switch and flicked it on and suddenly the room was flooded with bright light and there she was next to me.

"Oh my God," I said again and crushed her to me. "What the hell is going on?" I asked her.

"It's being changed by someone external," she said. "Try to stay calm and focus on me," she said soothingly. "It's going to push you beyond your boundaries. Just keep trying to remember why you are here."

"I'm trying. But it was so real," I said and run my hands over her to check she was here, and whole, and alive.

"I'm ok Tobias, I'm ok. And so are you," she said and pressed her lips to mine and we kissed for a few minutes.

"What can we do?" I asked her and we parted as I rest my forehead on hers, breathing in her air.

"Nothing at the moment. We are coming. You have to be patient," she answered and I started getting frustrated again. So few real answers. So little information. She hugged me tighter, feeling me bristle. "I love you Tobias," she said and put her hand on my cheek.

"I know. I love you too," I said and she grinned at me.

"Is Zeke coming?"

"Not yet," I answered and she kissed me, clutching me to her.

"I miss you so much," she said and sighed. "I can't wait to see you again. But you better get Zeke," she said, reluctantly and I sighed then nodded.

"Wait for me," I said as we let go of each other.

"Eternally," she said and blew me a kiss. I closed my eyes.

"That seemed better?" came Zeke's voice and I opened my eyes again.

WRITER'S NOTE:

Hey everyone. Hope you are enjoying the story so far! I am currently seeking feedback on what you think so far, what you think of it all and where you think it is going… so feel free to leave a review or drop me a message. Interested to pick your brains about it!

Look forward to hearing from you!