BO'S POV
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This isn't like her, something must be wrong.
I look up from my phone, smile taking over my face instinctively as I watch her jogging across the street. She's got that worried, 'I'm in trouble' look. It's adorable-so long as nothing is actually wrong. With my luck something will be wrong.
"I'm so sorry." She runs her hand through her hair, shaking her head as she steps off of the street. "I really cannot believe that I ended up being so late. I had a planned schedule to avoid this exact situation." I tilt my head, brow furrowing as I look over her. She seems okay. "You standing here alone waiting for me on the corner." My eyebrow raises, then I realize she's misreading my concern. "I really hate being late, even more so to meet you and-you aren't even paying attention." I can't help smiling as her nervous chuckles begin to turn to laugh, while she just gives me this little shrug. She's just so adorable. "What?"
"I was just thinking how adorable you are when you get nervous and ramble." My lips curving into yet another smile as I can't help but to lean in. Lips finding hers for one quick, sweet kiss. "Almost beats geek speak." Who am I kidding? One is never, ever enough. My lips stealing yet another kiss as I let my arms unfold between us. "Almost." Playful whisper against her lips, my hands passing her arms to find the curve of her waist.
"I'm beginning to think I should be late more often if this is the kind of greeting I'm going to be getting."
"Oh," Laugh escaping me as I nod, my noes brushing against hers. "So you want me to keep waiting on street corners in the middle of the night?"
"Are you saying you wouldn't?" This smirk plays over her very, very kissable lips. Her hands running up my arms until they come to rest on my shoulders.
"I'd wait an eternity for you if I had to," My eyes finding hers, holding them just I have so many times before. God, it was so easy to get lost in them. "Kinda wish I had to actually." I whisper almost, sighing at the thought that words like 'forever' and 'eternity' are only kind lies and ideal hopes.
"Bo," She speaks, but then suddenly hesitates and I can't help worrying something is wrong. "Wouldn't you much rather spend an eternity with me, rather than waiting for me?"
"That would be ideal," I can't help this sad laugh. It was actually just supposed to be a laugh, the sad part unplanned. Slowly I take a step back. "Yes."
"Well, how about we just start with tonight," Her eyebrow raises, beautiful smile taking over her face. "See how it goes?" Hm, frisky Doctor Lewis tonight-today might just actually turn around.
"That sounds great, Dr. Lewis". I do my best salute at her, hoping to earn a smile, and then grab her hand softly as we start walking.
Holding hands may be something 'normal' couples do every day, but when it comes to us, we rarely got the chance to do the normal simple things. We were always kicking fae ass, saving people, hell the whole world for that matter, so we never really got to have many easy simple moments as a couple. So whenever we get a chance to, it means a lot to me, and I know it means a lot to her too as I can see her smiling at me. If she only knew how beautiful she is, how lucky I am to have found her. She thinks I've saved her many times, but the truth is she's saved me more times than I can count.
"You know, some people consider staring rude". I can't help but chuckle, I never could when I tried to sound serious with her. "Although in your case I just find it very sexy". She gives me that adorable eye roll that tells me she's thinking how adorable she thinks I am, not that I'm complaining, more points for me. But my smile quickly fades as the events from today run back to the front of my mind, I wish I could shut them out but I just can't.
"So," She pauses cautiously. "What did he say?" Her once playful tone is serious now, since we both know how hard it's always been for me to talk about him. But if we want to have a real shot we have to work on our biggest flaw, communicating with each other.
"More lies. He's trying to brainwash me but I won't let him." Like always, I try to sound tough, but I know she doesn't buy it, she knows me too well and she knows how much I must be hurting. I'm hurting because of the pull he has on me, because I can't make him go the hell away, because I'm afraid I might become like him one day. But I will fight every day to keep that from happening. I won't lose myself. And I know having her by my side will always help with that.
"Right. Now, I know that him being here changes everything, but you can try to look on the bright side a little bit". She makes sure I hear the 'can' loud and clear. She knows optimism has never been my strong suit. I feel like there's something she's not telling me, something she's keeping from me, I wish I knew what it is.
"Uh-Mark got stabbed, Iris and Cece are dead and my dad is at your clinic. Please, tell me the bright side because I'm all tapped out for my gratitude journal". I almost scoff that out in my best sarcastic tone, though the way I look at her, I'm almost pleading her. Pleading that she'll tell me something to make me forget what a disaster today was, make me forget that one day too soon I'll lose her.
"I can think of three reasons!" She laughs, letting go of my hand as she runs out further into the street. I can't help smiling curiously at her. What in the world has gotten into her?
"What are you doing?"
"One, we're alive. Two, we just saved the whole world. And three," She falls silent, motionless and I feel myself go still. What's wrong? "I love you Bo Dennis."
"I love you too. Now get off the street," I laugh nervously, waving her back over to me. "You're making me nervous."
"What are we gonna have? Are we gonna do pizza or Thai? Or—or-or enormous cocktails?" She's almost yelling her words, and this huge smile plastered to her face. It's been so long since I've seen her this excited, this carefree. It's refreshing actually.
I hear the sound of this car horn and then there's this loud thud. This loud thud and I know what it is, I see it play out in front of me in slow motion. I see the truck slam into her and drive off without so much as slowing down. I see her fall to the ground motionless and I see it all-but I just can't believe it.
Life can be so funny, after all there is a reason why they say if you want to make God laugh then tell him your plans.
I go to her, stumble toward her and I just can't believe what I'm seeing. This isn't right-this can't possibly be right. She can't be dead. I just got her back. We just-we just-I'm not ready to lose her. I know-I know eventually I would lose her, it was inevitable, but not like this. Not so soon. I'm not ready.
I'm not ready.
Just as I can't believe she's gone-I can believe even less that she's moving. Her arm reaches up, grabbing the back of my neck as her eyes open up in an all too familiar piercing blue. I feel myself begin to weaken slightly. I see my chi flow passed her lips with such ease-it takes a second to realize I'm not the one doing it.
Suddenly, she lets me go.
"I-wha-Lauren?" I can't move, I can't breathe. I just stare into her eyes as tears finally fall from mine. "I-I don't-you-"
"Bo," She whispers my name, pain in her voice-but it doesn't compare to mine. "Bo just-just listen."
"You-we need to get you to a hospital." I stand up, hands shaking as I wipe my face trying to hide the tears.
"I-I don't need a hospital."
"You-I think-I think you do. You were just hit by a car," I trail off, looking one way down the street and then the next. She was just hit by a freaking car and-she just fed from me. SHE fed from ME after being hit by a freaking car. SHE NEEDS A HOSPITAL-right? "A car hit you Lauren." My voice raises unintentionally. "I really think that-you should need a hospital."
"Bo," I can see her try to stand up but her legs are broken. Oh my god, her legs are broken in so many places! I quickly get back on my kneed to help her sit up. I-I don't know what to do-how can she be so calmed? I'm barely holding it together here. "It's okay Bo, I really don't need a hospital".
"I repeat, you were hit by a car Lauren!" I can't help but to raise my voice, I didn't want to yell but this is too much. I can feel the tears running down my cheeks. "I have to call an-" Before I realize, it's happening again, she's feeding from me AGAIN. Why is she not surprised by this? Like she was expecting it to happen. Wait, was she expecting it to happen? No-no, no way, it's not possible. She would've told me.
We both look over at her legs-they're healed now. It's nothing new to me but to see it happen in someone else is a little weird, especially if that someone is Lauren, HUMAN Lauren. As I help her up all I can manage to do is stare at her. I need some answers and I need them now. What the hell is happening?
"I promise I'll explain everything, but for now could we just get off the street and go home?" She walks us over to the sidewalk and then starts looking for a cab like if nothing had happened just now.
"Home? Lauren, a car ran you over, how are you even standing up?! I don't understand-I-this doesn't make any sense." She just keeps ignoring me as a cab pulls over and she opens the door for me, but she can't keep ignoring me forever. "Lauren, what is happening?!"
"Bo please, let's just go home and then I'll tell you everything." Making a gesture for me to get in, almost pleading me with her eyes. Okay I'll get in, but I better get some freaking answers as soon as we get home.
"Where to, ladies? It's a beautiful night to-" He stops abruptly once he looks at her, clothes soaked in my blood, her face as well. "Oh my God, hospital?"
"You'd think, but the lady here doesn't want a hospital." Even though I repeatedly said she needed one, but apparently my girlfriend is now a succubus who has the ability to heal with chi. There's a sentence I never thought I'd say.
"No, it's fine." He looks at her like if she was a crazy person, and can't really blame him, I can still barely believe it myself. "Really, no need for a hospital." She just waves him off and gives him the address of the clubhouse.
"Please stop looking at me like that." It must have been at least 6 or 7 minutes of awkward silence before she says something. All I had been doing was stare, and not in the cute, 'you're so sexy' way she likes.
"Like what?" My tone is harsh and my eyebrow is raised, she must feel like I'm defying her and in all honesty maybe I am. I'm so-I'm so-I don't even know what to feel. All I know is that I'm angry, but more than anything I'm hurt.
"Like I'm a walking zombie." So many The Walking Dead scenes come to mind where she could've perfectly blended in with how she looks right now.
"Well can you tell me I'm wrong for thinking that?" Arms folded on my chest. I'm well aware I'm not being the spokesperson for maturity at the moment but I have every right to be angry. How long has she been keeping this secret for me? Days? Weeks? Months?
"No, but there's an explanation." I can see her starting to get a little upset. She knows even without me saying it, I'm accusing her of-of-something.
"One I'd love to hear." I barely let out the words. I need to look away from her, I can't hold back the tears any longer, but I only let one slip out before I quickly wipe it away. I don't want her to see me like this, to see how much I'm hurting right now. I can't see what possible explanation she could give me that would make this, make us okay.
"I promise you, you'll know soon enough." She takes my hand, and for a second I contemplate pulling away, but I don't, it's never been easy to pull away from her. I still don't look at her, I just keep looking out the window, wanting-no, needing for us to finally get home so I could get some answers.
This wasn't how tonight was supposed to go. This wasn't how any of this was supposed to be. Then again what with us goes according to plan?
Block after block staring at buildings, and people. Stupid happy, unknowing of all the things that go bump in the night people. This-how am I supposed to handle this. Better yet, what is this? I steal glances, just glances. Funny, stolen glances were most of what the first few months of knowing her was. Stolen glances and kisses and touches.
I notice the driver glancing up into the mirror every once and a while, who could blame him? Lesbian-Zombie drama-practically writes itself. Or he probably thinks I've done it. That's all I need. Call the police, get Dyson involved, well hell maybe then I'll get an explanation.
The car comes to a stop, I reach into my pocket giving him whatever is there. I think I just tipped him twenty over the fair, but it's not really my concern at the moment. I pull my hand from hers and make a dash for home. If I can just get home, somewhere safe and familiar then maybe I won't feel like this.
Maybe I can get an answer-an explanation that doesn't involve my head exploding.
I can feel her right behind me, normally I'd wait for her-or maybe fall behind her just a bit to watch her walk. God I love her body-but now I just need a bit of distance. This-there has to be some explanation. Something reasonable, doesn't there?
We make it to my room, and I glance around. What's next? I repeat over and over again until I finally look at her. She's covered in blood-well no shit, she was just ran over. I nod to myself, holding my hand up just enough to keep her from following me this time.
I just need a second.
I walk into the bathroom, or is it stumble, I can't even tell at this point. Leaning over I pick up a bowl from the floor, wash cloth already in it. I can't even remember now why it's here, doesn't matter serves my purpose. I take the cloth in one hand, turning on the water letting it fill the bowl.
People survive crazy things all the time. People see crazy things when they're in shock. This is just that. Simply the two situations colliding, because the alternative-no. That's what this is. Sighing, I hit the faucet off and walk back into the room.
"Sit down." My eyes moving over her as I realize she's already begun to make herself at home. Normally it wouldn't bother me, at the moment it kind of does.
"Bo?"
"Sit down." I repeat myself, taking a seat on the edge of the bed.
"I'm sorry."
"Don't." I shake my head, cutting her off as I stare up at her waiting. "Just sit down and let me take care of you." My voice breaks, eyes falling into the bowl.
"I-I really don't-"
"Need me to take care of you?" My attention snapping back to her, eyes narrow as I feel tears beginning to form in the corners of my eyes.
She doesn't speak again, just takes a seat in front of me. I dip the cloth into the bowl before reaching out and trying to get some of the blood off. I don't see a mark, there doesn't seem to be one-but there has to be. Several times I do this, but as the blood clears-there's nothing to be found.
"Does it hurt?" I whisper, wiping almost the last of it away from her temple.
"N—No."
"Good." She stares down at the bed, allowing me to continue. It's two more times before I come to realize I won't find anything. "There isn't a mark. You really don't need a hospital, do you?"
"No Bo, I really don't."
"You know," I can't help laughing. "I kept thinking that, you know, you see these things on the news where people after accidents get like superhuman strength. Or they're in shock and don't feel anything. Or there are miracles-I mean I've been kinda short on experiencing those, but I kept thinking about how you hear these things. The whole ride home I kept thinking about that, and kept telling myself that, that's what this was."
"Just let me-" She reaches for my hand, and on instinct I pull away. Strange that it's been such a long time since my instinct with her was anything other than to run to. I drop the cloth into the bowl, standing up as I walk the two steps to place on the nightstand.
"I don't understand Lauren. I'm trying to understand what happened, and I can't."
"Okay, okay! Could you please sit down so I can explain?" I comply, not exactly pleased about it but I do. "Remember how I was able to make the serum to turn Evony into a human?"
"Vividly." Boy did I remember. I know exactly how she managed to administer the serum. For a second I think my eyes flash blue, but only for a second, I don't think she notices it. Good, the last thing I need right now is her knowing how jealous I still am. We weren't together at the moment, I have no right to be upset. Focus Bo.
"Well, ever since that happened I've been trying to work on the opposite scenario." Her eyes fall to her knees, she looks ashamed. But, why? I already knew she'd been working on that for Evony.
"Yes I know, to turn Evony fae again." Again that tone of jealousy, come on keep it together succubus, this is not the time to be jealous.
"No-well yes that's what I've been trying to make it look, but not just for Evony." She finally looks up at me, her pleading eyes meeting mine and I know she can see the hurt.
"Why didn't you tell me?" I already know the answer, but I have to ask anyway.
"Would you have been okay with it?"
"Of course not! It's too dangerous Lauren!" I go to stand up but she grabs my hands so hard, making it impossible for me. When did she become so strong?
"I know, Bo!" Her grip on my hands loosens up a little as she feels me calming down. "I don't think I've ever been so careless before. But I couldn't stop myself." The brilliant, genius, OCD, meticulous, careful Lauren Lewis couldn't stop herself. That doesn't sound right at all.
"I need to know two things." I take a deep breath, doing my best to calm down. We need to have this conversation. "How and why?"
"Well the how took me a long time. I had my original serum formula, and after months of research I was able to figure out that the key to make the serum have the opposite effect was to isolate the mesenchymal cells, which are essential to the genetic modification process." Normally, I'd be all for the geek speak, but right now I need to actually understand what she's saying.
"Okay I know I've always said your geek speak was sexy, but could you just explain in plain English this time please?"
"Basically, if I somehow managed to isolate those cells, I could turn human cells into fae cells."
"Okay, that's better."
"The problem was that those cells are basically impossible to isolate, and the only way to do it was to inject a virus, but every time I tried that, the stem cells immediately destroyed it. I had been stuck for months until-" She trails off, and all I know is that whatever she's gonna say next is going to be bad.
"Until what?" My face completely serious at this point. What's wrong? What did she do?
"Until Hades gave me an idea." I-I-I want to say something, but no words come out. She's looking down at her knees again, she already knew how angry I would be when I found out she had been playing scientist with daddy dear.
"Hades? Are you serious? You went to him for help?!" I had been trying not to yell but I couldn't control it anymore, all my previous efforts to calm down proving useless at the moment.
"No, of course not, he was just at the clinic after the whole Mark situation and he saw my board and gave me a suggestion, that instead of trying a pathogenic virus, I should try a benign virus, that way the cells wouldn't attack it." More geek speak, though this one I can understand. But this doesn't justify that she took my father's advice, who by the way happens to be freaking darkness in its purest essence!
"Did you ever stop to think why my father would want to help you Lauren? He is not exactly a warm and fuzzy dad. He must have had an ulterior motive; he could've been trying to kill you for all you knew." I really can't believe this, she's usually so cautious, why would she ever trust my father?
"I know, of course I was cautious. I didn't just take his word for it. I did some tests on the samples I had and every single time I was able to modify them. It worked every time Bo. So-"
"So you injected yourself with a serum that could've very well killed you?!" Before she's even finished I start yelling-again. I pull my hands away from her so fast that she can't stop me, walking away and towards the dresser. I-I need a minute to process this.
"But it didn't. Bo, it didn't kill me. I'm still here. You don't have to be scared because I ran tests on myself afterwards and everything is fine, normal, I'm just fae now." Oh that's all? Well excuse me from being a drama queen and thinking that changing every cell in your body and risking your life in the process is a big deal! I really-I need to calm down.
"Now my second question is," I take a deep breath again, doing my best to understand, to act calmed. "Why? Why on Earth would you risk your life like that to turn yourself fae?" The second the words leave my mouth I can see her face change, going from calmed and apologetic to-not so calmed.
"Do you really need to ask me that Bo?" Her once calmed tone becomes a harsh one. She's giving me her best death glare, maybe I shouldn't have asked. No, no I did have to ask.
"Yes Lauren, apparently I do. Because I never told you that you needed to change who you were for me. The fact that you were human never stopped me from loving you. I can't understand why you would do such a stu-"
"Because I love you Bo!" Raising her arms in the air, she yells it out, surprising us both.
"I love you too, but-"
"No-no Bo. I LOVE you. From the moment I met you I've loved you. From the first not so professional examination I've loved you." She's a little more calmed now, but her tone is still serious, she wants to help me understand. "And even though you never wanted my mortality to be a problem for us, it is, it's always been there, because you've always known you were going lose me one day. I saw the look on your face earlier, the disappointed look because you knew we couldn't have a forever, at least not a forever in fae terms." I knew she had noticed how affected I was. But I never wanted her to feel like she had to change for us to be together.
"So you risked your life to be with me? What if the serum hadn't worked the way you wanted it to? What if it had killed you?!" A lot of 'what if's, but I know I'm right, what she did was way too risky, things could've gone terribly wrong.
"But it didn't!" I guess we're both yelling now. "It was risky and careless but I would do it all again Bo. Because you once told me you wanted to give this a real shot, be together. But as long as I was human, that was never going to happen." My mind wanders off to that day. The day I knew it was our time, the day I knew she wanted to have kids, the day I knew I wanted to be the one she'd have kids with. But the memory quickly fades away and the anger comes back. God, I'm so angry.
"It was stupid Lauren, you risked yourself for me! Why did you do such a stupid thing?!" I wish I could stop yelling, but at this point I can't control it, the anger has taken over, I want to understand but I can't, mostly I'm angry at myself because she did all this for me, for us.
"Because I wanted to be enough for you Bo!" She yells even louder than me as she walks over to me, cupping both my cheeks softly and looking straight into my eyes, telling me everything I needed to know just with a look, the most loving look she has ever given me. "In every way, I wanted to be enough, so you wouldn't have to worry about hurting me, or having to feed from others, to be able to heal you when you get hurt," I only realize I had been crying once she brushes my tears away. "For us to be able to make love without you being afraid of losing control." My eyes immediately go to the floor, but her hands won't let me. I had never lost control with her, but I've always been afraid to. And I've always been embarrassed that I couldn't offer her a monogamous relationship, that because of my nature I would always need to feed from others, even if it never meant anything, I know it hurt her, it hurt me too. Her voice breaking brings me back from my thoughts. "I wanted to be able to give you all that I am and have it be enough. Because like I told you earlier, I love you Bo Dennis, and I want to be your forever."
"I love you Lauren, so much, but-I just need a second." I take a step back, wiping my face dry. She can't help watching me. She has this frightened look, like she doesn't know what happens next. I honestly don't know either. "I just don't know how I should feel."
"It's okay." She smiles softly, taking a seat on the bed once again. "I'm not going anywhere."
"I want to be happy. Lord knows I want to be happy about this, but there's just the consequences and-"
"That's tomorrow's problem, or the next day, or the day after that." Her eyes fall to the floor, small laugh escaping as she does so. "As it turns out, we really may have forever, so time-not really a big deal at this second."
"Lauren," I sigh her name, caution causing me to fall silent once again. I'm really not sure what to say next-actually I'm not sure what I will say next. So many emotions running through my mind like a speeding freight train turned into a carousel with The Mad Hatter as the conductor.
I'm so angry that she lied to me-rather kept this from me. It's a lie of omission, but still a lie regardless-reasons be damned. But if I take a breath, I can't honestly say if my anger is because she kept this from me, or because of everything that could have happened. I've never been one known for keeping my emotions in check, or really knowing which I was feeling at the moment actually.
Apart from the many, many-many levels of anger and hurt, I can't help this strange feeling of hope. Hope that there isn't some major disaster waiting around the corner. Hope that this could honestly be something good for her-for us. Hope that I can promise a forever with her, and it won't just be an empty promise that holds the side note of 'forever is really only as long as you're alive'. Hope that we could actually have a shot at a real relationship. Not just the one we knew we were getting into, but real in the sense that I could actually remain monogamous-and not experience the side effects of my last attempt.
I'm still not exactly sure what I'm feeling, though all that anger and hurt seems to be taking a backseat to my hopeful imagination. I'm still not sure what to say, but yet I still find myself making my way to her. It must be another fifteen seconds or so before she finally looks up to face me. She looks a bit taken back, she must not have heard me.
"What's tonight's problem?" The words make their way passed my lips, smirk already threatening to make an appearance.
Hope really is such an interesting thing.
"Wh—what?" She looks up into my eyes.
"You said that the consequences," I smirk, holding out my hands giving me no choice but to take them. "And everything else is a problem for tomorrow." My jaw tightens, eyes moving over her face. God she is gorgeous. "So I ask, what's tonight's problem?"
"I wouldn't call it so much of a problem as a risky adventure."
"Ooh, my favorite kind." Smirk growing, leaning down almost awkwardly to drape her arms over my shoulders before crawling up onto the bed. My knees digging into her thighs, as I lower myself down into her welcoming lap.
"So I um," She clears her throat softly. "Wow completely having trouble keeping my thoughts in check."
"It's annoying, isn't it?" I laugh out, nodding playfully as I lean down. My lips finding that sweet spot on her neck. Teeth giving a light scrape before I kiss the tender skin.
"I-don't know if annoying is quite the word I would use."
"Just wait," My words trailing off as I gently continue to bite at her neck, sucking after each one. Hands maneuvering between us, pulling at her pesky shirt. "You'll get there."
"Where is there exactly?" She giggles out against my shoulder, giving a playful bite of her own.
I pull back, smirking devilishly. I had something to say, but looking at her now-I can't seem to find the words. Instead of speaking I just lean down, kissing up her jaw before finding her sweet lips. Soft kiss after soft kiss, soft bite to her bottom lip before I soothe it with my tongue.
"Have I mentioned how much I love your lips?" Question whispered against her lips, tongue already darting past my own to tease them again.
"Have I mentioned that I love yours?" She leans back just a bit, looking at me with an eyebrow raised. Her hands taking a cue from my mischievous own as they maneuver themselves between us, tugging before unbuttoning my pants.
"My, my, Doctor Lewis."
"What?" She just smiles again as I lean down, biting her bottom lip.
"Usually takes a little more-persuasion to get you to be so forward."
"Are you complaining?" Her teasing words trailing as she manages to pulls my zipper down further. These pants have to go-NOW! "Because I could most certainly dial down."
"Don't you dare." I order, pressing my hips down further adding just enough movement to earn the smallest moan from her.
The very firsts of many.
"Yes ma'am." She teases, leaning up to find my lips as she arches her hips to meet mine the best she can given our position.
Soft and gentle overlooked this time as her tongue slips passed my desiring lips without an ounce of hesitation. I can't help the rush of anxiousness building, it's been quite a while since I had noticed it so much with Lauren. I had spent so much time suppressing it and now-now it was sneaking back up. It's beyond exhilarating. My increasing need for dominance I'm sure becoming more and more apparent with every stroke of my tongue, and rock my hips. Her hands giving up at her task as they move under my shirt. Nails scratching my skin painfully pleasurably as they roam my body, my stomach, my hips, the small of my back.
My desire-my need to feel more of her becoming increasingly incontrollable.
My eyes open, this feeling of something new taking over rendering me weaker-yet I've never felt stronger. I've never felt more alive. Every inch of my body awakening in a way that I have yet to feel with anyone ever before, not even close.
"Oh my god!" Her voice startles me as she turns her head away, eyes tightly shut. "I'm so sorry. I-I don't know what that was." It takes me a second to understand what's happening. She's ashamed because she started feeding from me. I can relate after all the times I've tried to keep control and thankfully I've never lost it. But now, neither of us has anything to be embarrassed of or worried about. We're both free now.
"That, my dear doctor," My finger goes to her jaw, guiding her to look back at me. "Is called sucking chi." I can tell my eyes have gone to their usual brown to my not so usual blue. But what I see is what makes me smile as wide as I can, the sight before me was indescribably beautiful.
"What is it?" She asks confused as to why I'm staring at her, silly smile on my face.
"Your eyes," My thumb softly brushing against her cheek. "They look like mine." A soft chuckle escaping me. "My god Lauren, you look so beautiful." My lips going to hers once again, never getting enough, nibbling her lower lip. "Once again, you've taken my breath away." Slowly leaning forward, I kiss her right eye softly. "I don't care if you're human," Then her left one. "Or fae," I kiss her nose. "Or an alien for that matter". A soft giggle and a kiss to her lips. It sounded like a joke but it was the truth. "I will always love you no matter what. You have my heart, Lauren Lewis." I don't think I ever understood the meaning of unconditional love until this very moment, with her.
"And you have mine, Bo Dennis." She's crying now, but this time I know they are happy tears. I still can't believe I managed to win her heart. I can't believe that for the first time I don't have to be afraid of losing control, I don't have to be afraid of hurting her. I can see her expression change from a loving one, to that curious one she gets whenever she's working on a science experiment and I immediately know what's on her mind. "Do you um-" Quick peck on my lips. "I know you've never really uh-" She looks down, I know she's scared I'll say no. "From me I mean." She finally looks up as my smile fades. I don't know if I can, what if I end up hurting her after all?
"I want to, but what if I hurt you?" It's my turn to look down but she doesn't let me. She says there's nothing to be afraid of anymore but we won't really know until we try-right?
"Bo it's okay, nothing bad will happen. Just try it." Her eyes pleading mine again. She can see I'm still holding back, I'm still scared. "For the first time since we met you don't have to hold back with me, I want to give you all that I am and I want all of you."
I just give her a slight nod. And then-everything I knew changes. As I start seeing the chi flowing from her into me, for a split second I look at her, worried that I might be hurting her, but she looks so-revitalized. Is that how I look when I feed? I can tell my eyes are bluer than ever, because I've never felt like this before. This-this-connection with anyone before. I always knew our connection was strong but this, I had never experienced anything remotely close to this. It's like we've become one soul, one heart, one body. And the arousal I'm feeling, my fucking god, no one had ever made me feel this way without even touching me.
"Oh my-oh my god, Lau-Lauren that was-holy shit." I'm actually panting, barely able to form a thought. And she's-oh she's smirking. She must be pretty proud of herself. Have to admit I find it kinda sexy.
"I-I know, I can barely-speak. That was-wow. That's about all I can say at the moment. Is it always like this when you feed?" Even through her labored breath, I can hear the jealousy starting to form. And I honestly can't blame her, I wouldn't like it one bit if she experienced this with anyone else. This was the ultimate level of intimacy.
"No, not at all. I mean-I could always feel a rush of energy yes, but-oh my god, nothing like what just happened, that was-" I actually struggle to come up with the right word, but I simply can't. "I think we need to come up with a new word for it because mindblowing doesn't even begin to cover it." And oh wow did I mean that. We both begin to laugh, not really knowing why but we didn't care, this was the first time we could be so carefree. "Are you okay?" My laugh immediately replaced by a concerned look, funny how I could go back to being worried about hurting her a matter of seconds. And I know she didn't blame me, after all, this whole thing was going to take some getting used to.
"Well-define okay." I raise my eyebrow at her, half playfully, half concerned and she kisses my concern away. "Yes Bo, I'm okay. I'm perfect, I had never felt this close to you." She places her hand on my heart and I can't help but to sigh happily, amazing what the smallest touch from her could do to me. "I could feel all of you. Are you okay?" She gives me her own concerned look. Aren't we a pair.
"Are you asking as my girlfriend or as my doctor?" I ask playfully, arousal building up as I feel her hands back at the small of my back. She really has no idea what she does to me.
"Hmm-I'm asking as your sexy doctor girlfriend." I moan softly as she kisses and playfully bites my neck, on that perfect spot that she knows drives me crazy. "Do I need to do an inspection?" Another kiss and bite, a little harder this time. Well two can play this game, and this game in particular was going to be very fun.
"Well doctor, I do have this symptom at the moment." She pulls back to look at me, her eyes blue again so I know mine are too, I can feel it. Devilish smirk on my face as I rock my hips against her, knowing just how she likes it. "I'm so," I take her hand and guide her down my stomach. "Very," A little lower, passed the hem of her shirt. I can see her biting her lip, knowing it's driving her crazy how slowly I'm moving her hand. "Wet." Smirk growing even more as I know she has no further obstacles once her hand goes into my pants. I always knew she loved it that I never wore panties, and today was no different.
"Fuck Bo." That's all she can say before she bites her own lip. No one could make me this wet other than her, no one. And even though I didn't have any complaints about how we used to make love before, this time is-different, better. I can't really explain it, but I can feel more of her, it's a deeper connection, a more intense one and right now all I needed was her and nothing more. "Well, being a doctor and all, I'm sure I can do something about that." This was going to be fun.
"I'm absolutely sure you can." I moan out. More like whimper as her fingertips continue to tease the wetness between my aching lips.
"I don't know how you can control this." Her own moan escaping as she kisses along my collarbone.
"It takes a lot of practice." I smirk, eyes closing instinctively as the feel of her fingers becomes too much.
"Well it's lucky I have a good teacher at my dispense."
"I'd say more at your command." My laugh silenced by a groan of protest as she pulls her hand away. "Wh-."
"Shh."
Her order of little concern to me as she makes impressively fast work of my shirt-and then bra. Today I really should have opted out of wearing one. My mind in a single split second focusing on where I want her mouth gives her the opportunity to flip us. Lips part to tell her how hot that was, but the way she tears my pants from me just causes my giddy mind to wonder further down the lustful rabbit hole.
Smile on her lips as she stares down at me, I know what she's thinking. So many times the positions have been reversed, but tonight-tonight this show is all hers. My eyes wandering over her flawless body as she sheds her clothes just as quickly as she had removed my own.
Lauren has always been like gravity to me. Pulling me in with every look, every word, and every breath taken. Maybe that's why I can't help starting to lean up, my hands reaching for her. Instead I find her falling atop of me.
My moan muffled against her shoulder as our bodies slip into a familiar fit. Our legs intertwined with such ease you'd think we'd done this for a hundred years. Her moans joining my own to make one distinct sound that echoes through the room. Each rhythmic movement pleasurable, yet not enough at this moment. I don't think it is for her either. The way she grabs me, the pressure she puts into every movement only confirming my growing suspicion.
I need her like I need to breathe.
Every movement of ours earning a moan, starving lips finding every inch of skin possible, but it's not nearly enough. Her hungry lips roam without a destination-or they seemed to. A lingering kiss to the base of my throat before she moves up. My neck the next 'victim' of her delightful voyage, before lingering up my jaw line.
Then finally she finds my lips.
One long, passionate and hungry kiss after another until they begin to blend together. Just like that, in an instant-the inconvenient need for air is surprisingly not a factor.
My eyes coming to open, smirk on my lips in between the feeding kiss. A curiosity lingering in the back of my mind of how long it'll take her to realize. It must be a good ten seconds, before I find myself staring into these all too familiar eyes. I've looked into my own eyes so many times in mirror over the years-this is the first time I've ever found them beautiful.
She holds me tight as I gently pull chi from her, this rush ripping through my body I can't begin to describe. It's just a bit, ever so gently, just enough to coax her to do the same. It's only seconds before I feel her pull and I relinquish control back to her.
We fall into synchronicity with one another.
I feed just enough-and then she follows. Moan after moan, rhythmic rocking of our hips and impressive show of flexibility all just adding to the bliss that I had never dreamed possible. I mean I had fantasized so many times about this moment-but that's all it was ever supposed to be, a fantasy.
Fantasy had nothing on this.
Each exchange becoming a little more and then a little more after that-before the most interesting thing happens. I let myself lose control just slightly, give into desire just a little bit. Pulling more from her than I should as I arch my back up against her. She moans loud enough to focus my mind-but then that focus is gone when I realize she's already begun feeding from me.
My nails digging into her back, eyes opening to find hers once again already peering into mine. I should stop. I should stop this. So much can go wrong. I could lose control-she could lose control.
I should stop this-before I can't.
The way she pushes her hips down against me, almost painful-in the best way possible warns me it might be too late to stop already. The way she effortlessly takes more chi from me tells me it definitely is too late.
Just as everything else about us falls into sync-this is no different.
Each kiss, each skillful movement of our tongues never once faltering as our exchange becomes something more than feeding. It becomes something more than her just taking chi from me, and me from her-it becomes us. It's no longer mine and hers as entangled as our bodies have become-it's become something new altogether.
It's ours.
Hours go by before we are both exhausted; having given everything we had to each other and then some. We got lost in our passion, our desire, our bodies, our souls, our love. We got lost in each other.
We simply lie down, both happy, facing each other, like an everyday routine, and right now that actually seemed possible and not just a dream. This whole night had been so-so surreal I guess would be the best way to describe it. We had made passionate love many times, but never like this. Never had we been able to achieve this level of intimacy, of comfort, of freedom. This was like our first time-in a way.
At this moment, neither of us really needed to say anything. I knew everything I needed to know and so did she. Simple gestures, a smile, a touch, a look, they conveyed everything we were feeling. Happy sighs and innocent laughs filled the room. My god, I love this woman in front of me. As she kisses the palm of my hand, up to my arm, my shoulder, my jaw and finally my lips, I have to fight back tears. No one had ever looked at me the way she does. Sure I've had many-partners, and they always looked blissful afterwards, I am a succubus after all, but the way she's looking at me right now, like she can see into my soul, I had never experienced that before. No one could've ever come close to her. And it makes me so happy that after tonight, I will never need to be with anyone else again. Because she is mine and I am hers and that's more than enough.
If there was something certain, it was that life as we knew it was over. As we fall asleep we can't help but smile, looking forward to our forever, because yes, now we could finally have a forever